My Dad Passed Away This Morning
He was in the hospital and really bad off a few weeks ago when I flew to the East Coast to see him. I feared it would be the last time I ever saw him alive, so I made sure we got a chance to talk one on one.
He had surgery, it went very well, and I was filled with hope that at 80 perhaps he wasn't done and might live another 10 years. It wasn't meant to be.
My family has never been really close, but I certainly love my Dad and I cherish all that he did for us five kids. I never missed a meal growing up, the mortgage got paid, so I got to grow up in the same house and neighborhood and school district. During dark times when my parents were apart, but never separated or divorced, my Dad was the Ted Kramer (Kramer Versus Kramer reference) who took care of me, my younger brother, and one older sister still at home.
I can even remember a couple of trips that summer to visit my maternal Grandmother. She was an odd woman, and for several reasons--not the least of which was that she was an unabashed Republican and would probably be a Teabagger were she alive today. It was a very strained set of visits with her daughter astray and her son-in-law whom she clearly never liked bringing the Grandkids, but my Dad endured it to let her see her Grandkids. My Dad was a Democrat through and through, but he never confronted her for her wacky ideas, and she had some truly wacky ideas.
My Dad retired from Amtrak, and before there was an Amtrak he worked for Washington Terminal Company. He worked a couple of different jobs for Washington Terminal and Amtrak, but he was a ticket agent at Union Station in Washington D.C. for as long as I could ever remember. My Dad, my Mom, and us kids at home got to ride the trains for free, along certain routes. Got to ride all the way up to Boston once, out to Cincinnati and back, and Baltimore, Philly, New York a number of times. Really developed a love for the trains, but I'm not one of those train nuts who videos trains going by. My Dad and I chuckled at train nuts, but on some level I get why they love to video trains.
In a weird roundabout way, during a Bring Your Kid To Work Day, he introduced me to computers and perhaps unknowingly planted the programming bug that led me to go into IT and become an application programmer. 30 or 35 years later, and I still vividly remember it and the impact it had on me. This was one of the things I made sure I shared with my Dad when I saw him. I told him how much I appreciated it, whether accidental or intentional, and it was very much a gift that I cherished. Sending five kids to college just wasn't going to happen, but for at least a time three of us were living at home while attending college. I still feel the gift of doing something I love to do is perhaps the greatest gift I could ask.
After being adopted, then going to school at a Catholic Military School in the 30s and 40s, I know my Dad had a really rough childhood. Over the years, there were some things he shared with me. Other things he shared with my brother. Probably other things I didn't want to know.
My Dad was a smart aleck who always made me laugh, and that is definitely something I either inherited or developed from him. Another precious gift from him.
I was anticipating his passing, but I wasn't prepared. I don't think anything can prepare you. When I got the call from my sister, I knew. Had to let it go to VoiceMail, listen, and call back. Could not even function the rest of the day, so I had to leave early. Felt I was in a daze just floating through the day. Spent the day with my wife and kids.
At 80, with health issues he'd been battling for years, I think my Dad fought hard and beat the odds against him.
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I dread the day I will make a similar one. 
I lost both my parents while still a child. Every now and then I allow myself an imagined glimpse of what might have been had they lived. Ideally, mine would have been a story much like yours.
Peace be with you. Your father's life sounds like it was a life well lived.
So sorry for you loss.
What a nice tribute you wrote...sounds like he was a terrific person.
Peace.
I went through the loss of my father last year and it was very difficult because of all of the fighting within my family.
Thanks for the stories. I read them with a smile and tears.
He sounds like a good man.
Condolences to you and your family.
You are never prepared to say the last goodbye.
Wishing you and your family fond reflections, healing and peace.
Deepest sympathy to you and yours
[hr][font color="blue"][center]There is nothing you can't do if you put your mind to it.
Nothing.[/center][/font][hr]
May he rest in peace.
there aren't any words that will make it easier. Thank you for sharing him with us.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is like losing a part of yourself.
Peace to you.
I hope you find peace in the coming days. My grandfather died last year, and my mother was a total champ through the whole ordeal. My father-in-law passed away 10 years ago this October, and I am worried about my husband on this painful anniversary.
Your tribute to your dad is quite touching. Thank you for sharing it.
May all of the memories of times with your Dad stay in your heart forever and may those memories bring you comfort and help ease the sadness.
and bless those great memories!
Beautiful and emotional post.
What a wonderful tribute you wrote. Your Dad's generation was the best and the colorful stories! Know what an enormous loss.
Lost 97 yr old Dad in June and still grieving despite his age. He was orchestra leader and when I watch video of him playing piano for the last time this year...I play this video as makes me feel better. Hope it makes you feel better as well.... also planted a lot of seeds and healing to see things growing 
...for you (((Kennah))) and your family. I lost my mom two years ago this past Saturday and the time still seem to creeps by slowly. And let me tell you it will get easier to bare, even though I felt (or wanted to feel) she would live forever. BUT, you and I both know they are in a better place and there is nothing more we could do for them. So praise God! 
Take care of yourself during this stressful and painful time.
Having lost both my parents I truly feel for you. There is no easy way thru it. You are among friends here at DU. A lot of us have been where you are now. You know you can lean on us at any time. I hope your family can keep it together during this time. I will say a prayer for you for strength.
Losing a parent is very tough.
peace eventually comes to you again. I'm so sorry for your loss, and I'm glad you have great memories of your father.
my dad turned 75 today and I called and talked to my step mom as well who said I REALLY need to get out there to see my dad...and I do....but its going to be hard to go out there knowing its probably the last time
Gonna try and do a parental tour around turkey day...my parents then hubbys parents...
