UPDATE: “AYN RAND & ATLAS SHRUGGED IN UNDER 10 MINUTES.”

[JEFF9K]

When I attempted to become the first person to actually read Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged I didn't expect to make a video about it. But many months later, after finishing the book and half-a-dozen biographies about the author I got the idea to make a little video. Nine-and-a-half minutes is little, compared to the nine-and-a-half months it took to do all that reading.

At the end of January 2013 I posted a video to YouTube called “Ayn Rand & Atlas Shrugged in Under 10 Minutes.” Not surprisingly, I was bombarded with negative comments from conservatives who had been told by Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck that Atlas Shrugged is a great book.

One guy kept insisting that I never read the book. I told him that if he didn't apologize for being so stupid I would delete his comments. Of course he didn't and so his comments were removed. Then he got all his friends to post the exact same comments that he posted. I asked what the possible motivation could be for making a video about a book I hadn't read. Now he concentrates on getting everyone he knows to vote “thumbs down.” I'm pretty sure I will hear from him again when the “thumbs down” surpass the “thumbs up.”

Another guy said that the video wasn't accurate because Satan didn't really endorse Atlas Shrugged, even though Anton LaVey's Satanic Bible was inspired by it.

One person said that I was wrong in saying that Rand “hero” Ragnar the Pirate was responsible for countless deaths overseas by sinking ships carrying relief supplies. He insisted that the ships weren't sunk. I gave him a page number and told him to look it up. Then he tried to tell me that Ragnar took the captured relief supplies and distributed them himself to the people overseas.

One guy refused to believe that John Galt's speech promoted atheism. He may have changed his mind when I gave him a dozen examples, but it's hard to tell when you are dealing with conservatives.

Someone thought he had proof that the video sucked because it had only 88 “likes” out of 10,000 “views.” I told him that while anyone on the Internet can watch YouTube videos, only members can vote. Anyway, the “like-view” ratio was double the 0.4% ratio of popular videos featuring Justin Beiber and Nicky Minaj.

A guy insisted that Atlas Shrugged MUST be a great book because it has sold so many copies. Well, the book is nearly 1,200 pages long and libraries don't let you keep books for eight months! If you want to read it you HAVE TO buy it! I bought it, and hated it, like I knew I would.

Countless people have bought the book on the recommendation of Rush Limbaugh and his fellow fraudcasters. Few have made it past page ten! Did I mention that some conservative billionaires buy Atlas Shrugged in bulk for free distribution to schools and libraries?

One individual called the video long and boring. I guarantee THAT person never read Atlas Shrugged!

[Barack_America]

1. I read every page of that piece of shit.

Horrible literature and a despicable, childish philosophy.

[JEFF9K]

13. As Whittaker Chambers said ...

... in his famous book review, it's a preposterous story meant to be taken as political reality. And Chambers was a conservative!

[Warpy]

49. I did, too

and the only thing good that came out of it were the gales of laughter at reviews like this one.

I do confess I skipped most of the multi page polemics after I'd read the first few, they were already getting to be repetitive. Perseveration, thy name was Rand.

Even at the ripe old age of 16, I know it was a pile of shit.

The only wonder is that so many people take it seriously. They must be the ones who never read beyond the first four pages, if that, before they skipped to the last page.

[alarimer]

2. I loathe that book.

I have finished it, yet somehow never made it through Moby Dick, one of the greatest American novels.

Atlas Shrugged is probably one of the worst things ever written. It might be better, barely, than 50 Shades of Grey, but I doubt it.

Ayn Rand was an atheist, unfortunately for us in the atheist movement, because we have to share it with weirdo libertarian types. I wonder if Paul Ryan, who has admitted admiring Rand, knew she was an atheist?

I want to ask all those libertarians about the days of the robber barons and child labor. It seems like that was the golden age of libertarianism. No rules, just unfettered capitalism. Would they really be in favor of child labor? Because that is what happened when we had no laws reigning in capitalism. These companies did whatever they wanted, with impunity. It was acceptable for children to work in coal mines. We needed laws to stop them. Left to their own devices, it would happen that way again. Libertarians would probably argue that it wouldn't, that we have changed as a society. Well, yes, enough people decided the rules needed changing and they were, but they had to make laws forbidding child labor, because it wasn't enough to rely on companies to do it voluntarily. It never is.

[tblue37]

8. It already HAS happened that way. Since our oligarchy

has purchased laws to reward rather than punish corporations that ship jobs overseas, most manufacturing is now done in places with few or no regulations controlling environmental damage, abuse or endangerment of workers, or exploitation of child labor. Even where there are a few rules governing such things, enforcement is essentially nonexistent, so the regulations are just for show.

[Enthusiast]

23. History proves that corporations

have no limits in their desire for ever increasing profits.

Where I live coal miners actually had to go on a long strike to get the scales adjusted accurately to reflect the true amount of coal they dug. A miner would have to dig several hundred pounds over 2,000 to equal one ton. The scales were calibrated by a special officious looking coal company employee. It was universally understood that the scales favored the company.

Every abuse imaginable is on record in organized labor history.

We can return to those days. And we are well on the path.

[Pretzel_Warrior]

3. Truth? I didn't make it all the way through your vid

Or the book. I was expecting more of a short, stitched together synopsis of the plot. One that mocked the book and made me laugh or something.

But thanks for the video and for spreading the word about how craptastic that book is.

[thelordofhell]

4. This guy's got you beat

[Pretzel_Warrior]

6. Bahahaha!

Hilarious

[JEFF9K]

11. He nailed it!

[treestar]

5. I did make it through

Most of the characters were unlikeable.

I'd read some biography on her, too. She was unable to get along with anybody for long. Eventually the person would think something "immoral" as she put it for any disagreement with her.

[JEFF9K]

10. The only decent person associated with Rand and her movement ...

... was her husband, Frank O'Connor.

[hatrack]

7. Meh. I'll see your video and raise you one 'Fountainhead In 5 Seconds'

[JEFF9K]

12. That movie was a lot more successful than ...

Atlas Shrugged Part I, Part II, Part III, ...

[Walk away]

52. This should have been the director's cut!!!

It is 100% better than the actual movie!

[Jester Messiah]

9. I can give it to you in five words.

"Fuck you, I've got mine."

[Zorra]

14. Atlas Shrugged in one second.

[JEFF9K]

36. That's asking for trouble ...

... the cats may poop on the carpet!

[Zorra]

43. Good one!

[MrMickeysMom]

15. I love this...

Thank you. Atlas Shrugged.. the long version of reading your toilet after "number 2"...

Oh, I wasn't going to read it anyway, but now I have more reasons besides trying to figure out her idea of "objectivism". I guess the objective was to never finish insulting the hustings…

[ornotna]

16. There was a good summary posted a while back

And here it is. I really like this one.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021132043

[JEFF9K]

34. You are right. It's a good summary!

[Tyrs WolfDaemon]

17. I just had a thought (that is dangerous, at least according to my family)

(It has been years since I've read this stuff and to be honest, I couldn't finish Atlas Shrugged, so bear with me for a second)

Could Kafka's human bug from "The Metamorphosis" have been some kind of premonition of Ayn Rand and her ideas?

I'm curious as to what others here think.

[JEFF9K]

35. "Ayn Rand Cult" by Jeff Walker ...

Some say that Rand was an original thinker, but Jeff Walker, in his excellent book "Ayn Rand Cult," (Open Court, Chicago and La Salle, Illinois Copyright 1999) says otherwise.

From my notes:

page 4: Many of Rand's ideas are taken directly from 1920s business theory. Atlas Shrugged was written to serve as pro-business propaganda. There have been other Ayn Rands: Mary Baker Eddy, Edward Bellamy, Count Alfred Korzybski, L. Ron Hubbard, Werner Erhard, Bhagwan Rajneesh.
page 81: Rand's thinking was narrow-minded and slipshod
page 225: Rand was no great originator of ideas
page 226: Philosophers are mostly appalled by her sloppiness and ignorance
page 227: Rand had egregiously poor scholarship
page 288: Rand's rhetoric of selfishness and satisfaction in productive achievement is lifted wholesale from many writers.
page 300: the basic idea of the plot of Atlas Shrugged, that prosperity and civilization depend on a few creative minds, was familiar to 1920s business theorists.
page 305: Atlas Shrugged was similar to Garrett's THE DRIVER
page 308: Atlas Shrugged is so similar to Ernest Bramah's THE SECRET OF THE LEAGUE that some think Rand plagiarized from it.


Books about Ayn Rand are much more interesting and fun to read than Atlas Shrugged, but that's a really low bar!

[Tyrs WolfDaemon]

42. I was thinking she was more like a huge cockroach in human skin

(insert mild to chuckle to a four second laugh here)

[rustbeltvoice]

18. Hell-o Jeff,

I must admire your endurance. And i have to respect your resistance to surrender to the idjits that responded to your presentation.

Reading the whole thing...... . Have you ever been in a room where autopsies were being done?

Some how, i have this image of being blindfolded, and being given spoon, and a large bowl or bucket. After tasting the first spoon, and finding it as gruesome as vomit, i can not fathom emptying the container by ingestion.

Somewhere, i had a teacher/professor who required two book reports. He said he was not accepting one that told how bad the book was, "Why would you read more than fifty pages of crap not quit?" O.k., he was more polite than me, and did not say 'crap', but after so many years i forget the exact wording.

[JEFF9K]

37. Very well said ...

... and I like your teacher's philosophy.

[riverbendviewgal]

19. I read all of Rand 's books

The first was Atlas Shrugged in 1980 on recommendation from a younger coworker. I read the Fountainhead because it had been made into a movie. I was struck at the main theme of her books that selfishness is good.
Through the years I noticed those who like her books are conservatives who have no charitable feelings. I would be surprised to find DUrs liking her writings. We do have empathy.

[calimary]

20. I once heard it said that ayn rand turned selfishness into a sacrament.

And you're spot-on about charitable feelings. Remember when cheney and friends openly scoffed at the whole idea of empathy? And they were proud of it! Viewed it as a sign of strength and character and very "the adults are back in charge." Which is what they actually said after they TOOK office following the Clinton administration. DISGUSTING. Utterly and completely DISGRACEFUL!!! Ironically, many of these same people claim (and rather loudly, too) that they are devout followers of Jesus Christ. Seriously, understanding the message of Christ as I was taught it in Catholic school, selfishness was certainly and demonstrably NOT His thing. As my mom used to say "heart like a BB." A most excellent comparision. BBs are very small, and very hard, and very cold.

[rustbeltvoice]

21. Hell-o Mary,

I do not know how to begin this. What is the difference between hypocrisy and mendacity?

About Jesus. You know the representation of the Sacred Heart of Jesus? The blood and thorns, Jesus was the first bleeding heart liberal.

These people (yes i know that phrase people take as an offensive dismissive insult, but there is here a commonality). Ayn Rand, Dick Cheney and so many more have a similarity.

I wrote this concerning the dark one.

Occasionally, new words and phrases enter the language. Some are proverbial or axiomatic, they even become reflexive. A new one ought to be, lying like Dick Cheney. Darth Cheney will not stop. That permanent smirk announces, with a voice of invented, constant certitude, lies without end. He will carefully select where, and with whom, he speaks. He retracts nothing.

Remember, he told the first public lies that began the ginning up to war. Now, he spews constant diarrhœa cheering torture. Also remember, that another sobriquet for the Devil is the father of lies. He is truly evil.

I can go on, but either one follows the gist, or one does not accept it.

[Enthusiast]

24. Dick Cheney?

The architect of 911 and the Iraq War.

[calimary]

33. Eloquent!

I rather enjoy pointing out another painful truth: that physically and anatomically, the human being is quite literally designed and built to be liberal. The human heart, after all, hangs to the LEFT.

[Snarkoleptic]

22. I was at my brother's house and saw Atlas Shrugged on the bookshelf.

It was a paperback that appeared in near perfect condition, so we all know what that means...
Anyhow, he and my dad were talking about Objectivism and all that other Randian bullshit, so I suggested we watch an interview she did with Mike Wallace.
After watching the video showing the object of their admiration with her creepy/shifty eyes, slouching/shifting posture and poor grooming, they were largely silent as I railed on her "greed is good" bullshit.

Ayn Rand as an abstract character has appeal for some, but the reality of the amphetamine addled crank is hard for folks to handle. Show them their hero and all her faults and they're less likely to idolize her. The fact she was a serial adulterer, speed freak and hate merchant who died on welfare must not be glossed over.

There are also Rand interviews done by Tom Snyder and Phil Donahue on youtube, which I recommend showing to those who hold her in high esteem.

Here's a link to the first part of the Mike Wallace interview...

[JEFF9K]

38. I recently got a paperback edition of The Fountainhead in near-perfect condition ...

... at a yard sale. The first three pages were dog-eared.

[Blanks]

44. There's a Johnny Carson interview out there somewhere too. eom

[JEFF9K]

53. Thanks for bringing up the Carson interview. ...

... I found the link and just watched it for the first time. Notice near the end, at 12:31, where Ed McMahon asks her about the family unit of husband, wife, and child. Her reply leaves out any mention of child. She hated kids. They are practically non-existent in Atlas Shrugged, except for 8-year-old Millie Bush, who's brutal attack was partially "justified" by Rand because the girl was "ugly."

[Buns_of_Fire]

25. Perhaps Trey Parker and Matt Stone need to work on a musical version.

I think people are being much too critical, though. Atlas Shrugged is, without a doubt, the best doorstop ever published -- especially if you duct-tape the pages together so there's no chance of them ever accidentally opening.

[Cha]

26. Well, your video did make me laugh.. thank you, Jeff.

I kept flashing back to my dorm room at the UofA in the '60s.. eating pastrami sandwiches from the deli and reading Atlas Shrugged. I don't remember a damn thing about it or why I was reading it.

All I know is Paul Ryan and Rand Paul are horrible despicable human beings and the poor people who fall for their special brand of stupid should be deeply ashamed of themselves.

[JEFF9K]

39. Thanks, I tried to make it entertaining.

[Cha]

45. Ya did.. it was

the dry humor I liked. And, that drawing image of ayn keep popping up. rofl

[hobbit709]

27. When I was a kid I read voraciously. I would read with a flashlight under the blanket

when I was supposed to be sleeping. Rand was the only author that would put me to sleep in under 25 pages.

[TBF]

28. I've posted the "abridged" (funny!) version before on DU -

and others have as well. There used to be a mopie.com site we could link to. If anyone has credits or knows a more recent site to link to please let me know as I did not create this, but I wish I had because it is hilarious:

Atlas Shrugged (by Ayn Rand)
ATLAS SHRUGGED: THE ABRIDGED VERSION (with spoilers)

AYN RAND:
Hello, I'm Ayn Rand. I wrote a novel based on my Objectivist philosophy called The Fountainhead, but I don't think 700 pages was quite enough to get my point across, so I will write the exact same novel, only it will take 1100 pages this time.

READERS:
Hey, great.

HEROINE:
I'm Dagny Taggart. I am a railroad tycoon, woman-in-a-man's-world, stunningly beautiful heroine. I am the only person capable of running this railroad. I am the only woman in the universe worth a damn. I am also the only woman in the universe with a real job. I am basically the only woman in this novel.

LOVE INTEREST #1:
I have worshiped you, the only woman in the universe worth a damn, from afar for my whole life.

HEROINE:
That's nice.

LOVE INTEREST #2:
I have worshiped you, the only woman in the universe worth a damn, naked on the forest floor. Yet I will nobly step aside in the name of noble idealism, despite the fact that I love you and want you, the only woman in the universe worth a damn, desperately.

HEROINE:
Okay.

LOVE INTEREST #3:
I worship you, the only woman in the universe worth a damn. Let us have creepy rape fantasy sex now. I will not ask permission to do all these kinky things to you, but luckily you want to be forced into all the kinky things, you dirty bitch.

HEROINE:
This is clearly true love! Stick it in me.

ALL:
Who is John Galt?

AYN RAND:
I am not telling. Instead, please listen to someone pontificate about my Objectivist philosophy for a while.

SOMEONE:
Pontificates

VILLAINS:
There are many of us, but we are all exactly the same. We are caricatures of evil socialists and embodiments of pure evil. Let us create a perfect socialist world order ruled by the inept! We all suck! Socialism sucks! Ha ha!

HEROES:
We are all exactly the same. We are noble and perfect and have very angular and insolent faces. We can read each other's minds and the minds of everyone else in this novel, leaving less room for misunderstanding and more room for pontificating. And we are all in love with Dagny Taggart, the only woman in the universe worth a damn.

ALL:
Who is John Galt?

VILLAIN:
Threatens hero.

HERO:
Flips coin
If it's heads, I will gaze apathetically. If it's tails, I will laugh heartily.

VILLAIN:
Although these are the only two things any of you heroes have done for the past 800 pages, I am shocked at this response! How could you! How dare you!?!

HERO:
I will now pontificate about Ayn Rand's philosophy. It has been at least 50 pages since you've heard it.

AYN RAND:
It is so convenient that all of my heroes are in perfect agreement about my philosophy so that their pontificating is so interchangeable.

ALL:
Who is John Galt?

JOHN GALT:
Hello. In this, the culmination of all the pontificating, I will explain Ayn Rand's philosophy for a full 57 pages. No, I am not kidding. This one monologue will last for 57 pages. Oh and also, I love Dagny.

DAGNY:
I love you too. Man, this is really going to suck for Love Interest #3.

LOVE INTEREST #3:
Despite my passionate love for you and enjoyment of our rape sex, and the fact that there is no other woman on earth worth a damn, and the fact that I sacrificed my life's passion on your behalf, and that I spent my entire fortune to get a divorce to be with you, I will now nobly step aside in the name of noble idealism.

DAGNY:
Great! I will miss our creepy rape sex. Farewell.

LOVE INTEREST #3:
Bye.

READER:
Wait, what?

ATLAS:
Shrugs

THE END

[Pholus]

31. Simply Awesome, but "Book a Minute" did it quicker....

http://www.rinkworks.com/bookaminute/b/rand.atlas.shtml

[TBF]

32. lol - that is terrific! nt

[JEFF9K]

41. Excellent! ....

... A longer version might mention that there is, for all intents and purposes, no place for children in either Atlas Shrugged or among most of Rand's inner circle.

[Turbineguy]

29. Oddly enough

a lot of people who support that philosophy would fall into Rand's cohort of "Looters".

[JEFF9K]

40. Very true!

[Pholus]

30. Ugh. TLDW: Ten minutes is too much.

And, if the sales argument is right then L. Ron Hubbard is simply God compared to old Ayn based on the number of copies sold.

[Rex]

46. I've tried to read it, cannot do it. It is a piece of trash.

Literature it is not.

[nyquil_man]

47. I love your dry, sarcastic tone.

Some favorites:

"... took 13 years to write and takes nearly that long to read. At least it seems like it."

"... the most boring, goofy nonsense you can imagine."

"The library... doesn't allow writing in the margins, especially the words you'll want to use."

[JEFF9K]

50. Thanks. That helps to balance out some of the negative comments from conservatives.

[Amaril]

48. Read it years ago......

.......my boss at the time recommended it - said it would "change my life"........yeah, not so much.

What I remember:

* Took me 6 months to read -- I finished it out of sheer stubbornness (i.e., this book is NOT going to beat me!). By way of comparison, I read Stephen King's "The Stand" (unabridged version is a healthy 1,168 pages) in three days.

* John Galt soliloquy = 47 pages. I counted them.

* Impenetrable force field that rendered her Utopia invisible! That was actually kind of cool (I always was a sci-fi nerd).

* Ayn Rand obviously liked to read herself write the way some people like to hear themselves talk.

[JEFF9K]

51. I wouldn't want to work for a boss who recommends the book.

[Amaril]

54. You'll notice I said "at the time"

I was 22, newly married, had just relocated to a new city with my career-military husband, and took a temp job as a secretary with a government contractor that replenished military medical supply ships stationed around the world. The management team was comprised solely of retired (Vietnam era) military personnel (primarily Marines). They were an interesting group of people -- every single one of them just a bit crazy in one way or the other. Believe it or not, he was, easily, the most sane of the bunch.

[JEFF9K]

55. I've been lucky enough to work for a liberal boss for many years. ...

... Interesting story about the Marines!