General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsWould you have a problem being in a public bathroom with someone who is transgender?
This refers to the story about the Pastors in Houston fighting an anti discrimination ordinance.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/national/religion/houston-subpoenas-pastors-sermons-in-gay-rights-ordinance-case/2014/10/15/9b848ff0-549d-11e4-b86d-184ac281388d_story.html
NYC_SKP
(68,644 posts)If we were truly evolved, we wouldn't have separate toilet facilities.
Erich Bloodaxe BSN
(14,733 posts)Every bathroom would be unisex, with stalls.
The only problem with that even now is the danger of attacks. I think I'd be really nervous if I first saw a female friend go into a bathroom, and then some crazy-eyed guy go into the same one. Of course, trans folks have to worry about that even more than straight women.
Xyzse
(8,217 posts)As a guy, I'd feel bad.
Have you seen how Men's bathrooms compare to women?
Oie vey. The misfires and stained floors can be quite embarrassing.
I don't care who uses what. I just know how dirty the men's stalls are in comparison.
It is one thing to be standing up, but having to sit down on that is gross.
TDale313
(7,820 posts)I don't feel as bad then.
pipi_k
(21,020 posts)I've seen my share of gross, disgusting and putrid ladies rooms.
Makes you wonder what their home bathrooms are like.
Live and Learn
(12,769 posts)Mojorabbit
(16,020 posts)dballance
(5,756 posts)Pastors in Houston are obviously ignorant.
I think the women's room is the safest place for a transgender woman and I'd hope she'd use it.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Have no problem with men bringing their children in with us either.
JustAnotherGen
(31,937 posts)She's much safer with us.
cwydro
(51,308 posts)Back in the day in the gay bars...we would use whichever was available.
fadedrose
(10,044 posts)Personally, I like public bathrooms best when I'm the only one there
PeteSelman
(1,508 posts)But I can see where women might have a problem with it the other way.
Last week's South Park dealt with the issue quite well I thought.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Coed restrooms would be fine with me too.
PeteSelman
(1,508 posts)Go on the street and ask women what they think of either idea.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)In my personal experience women are more sympathetic towards sexual minorities.
sweetloukillbot
(11,098 posts)There was a big stink with the owner banning TG customers because women were complaining about them peeing standing up in the women's room.
The place ended up closing, then reopened as a gay bar. So I'm sure some of it was just a marketing ploy from the owner, but there were real, angry women being interviewed about how uncomfortable it made them feel.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)If the women were so uptight why were they in that bar to begin with?
eridani
(51,907 posts)If someone is peeing standing up in a stall with a closed door, how would anybody know?
3catwoman3
(24,070 posts)...in the opposite direction. It is possible to see the shoes of the person in the stall next door.
eridani
(51,907 posts)snooper2
(30,151 posts)plus, there is no butt sound buffering effect
FYI
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)And of course those nasty types can't possibly be expected to wipe their own piss off a toilet seat.
I'd prefer to know it was a presurg TG.
At least the aim would be better.
MillennialDem
(2,367 posts)People with penises can sit to pee too and the last thing anyone transgender wants is to get bounced for "being the dude in the chicks bathroom"
Eleanors38
(18,318 posts)One_Life_To_Give
(6,036 posts)Now why with a padded girdle around your knee's and holding the hem of your dress, one would decide to do something so masculine?
That would be the real question. Be about as convenient as using a urinal while wearing side zip pants.
sweetloukillbot
(11,098 posts)But it was a big news story in Scottsdale for a few months, a transgendered artist who was playing at that club cancelled a concert over it.
Here's a follow-up story... http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/1113transgender1114-ON.html
pipi_k
(21,020 posts)depending on how far away the source is.
I have bad knees and often have to pee standing up if the toilet is too low and/or there are no grab bars.
There's a definite difference in how it sounds. Louder and more echo effect from standing up. More of a tinkling effect, no real echo when sitting down.
PeteSelman
(1,508 posts)In general, men have much less of a problem with a woman in the men's room than women do with a man in the woman's room.
Look, I understand the whole transgender thing. Most people don't see it that way yet.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)I get what you're saying.
LeftInTX
(25,607 posts)However, if someone is standing up to pee, I would think it's a guy.
pipi_k
(21,020 posts)some of us use these
http://go-girl.com/index2.asp?utm_expid=14210237-3.7g4QgiWOThKXbKJulh46KA.1&utm_referrer=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2Furl%3Fsa%3Dt%26rct%3Dj%26q%3D%26esrc%3Ds%26source%3Dweb%26cd%3D1%26ved%3D0CDUQFjAA%26url%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.go-girl.com%252F%26ei%3DZfo_VKbMO8yxyASCjoLoAw%26usg%3DAFQjCNGpDUotny1yoS0zisBkYbDQVmocxw
Due to issues with bad knees or a general distaste for public toilets
If I ever travel to a place where you gotta squat, I'm buying.
When I use a porta potty, I don't let my cheeks touch the seat.
Eleanors38
(18,318 posts)In a sense, women deer hunters have an advantage, if the device works, by lessening odors. Even if men pee into a jar and immediately cap it, the vapor is unmistakeable to wildlife. I try to mask mine with raccoon piss (its bottled) which could cover the cats in the Coliseum.
LakeVermilion
(1,044 posts)Are there other reasons to use a rest room?
Honestly, I don't believe that GLBT people are tuned into sex 100% of the time. I don't think about sex in a public restroom. I do my business and leave.
baldguy
(36,649 posts)burrowowl
(17,653 posts)uppityperson
(115,681 posts)Bigmack
(8,020 posts)Starry Messenger
(32,342 posts)No.
Myrina
(12,296 posts)I'm there to do business, not spot-check everyone else's privates.
upaloopa
(11,417 posts)I have taken cultural diversity training and transgender people are some of the people we are trained to work with as clients. We are trained to make people feel comfortable getting services from us and I have no problem with transgender people.
closeupready
(29,503 posts)a female-to-male transgender person (saying as a male, myself).
If, on the other hand, you mean a female who was born in a male body but is now biologically female, then yes, I wouldn't want that.
uppityperson
(115,681 posts)closeupready
(29,503 posts)Obviously, I've been places with unisex toilets, but to answer the question if I would have a problem, just being honest (not a huge problem, on balance).
uppityperson
(115,681 posts)You wrote:
"a female-to-male transgender person"
vs
"female who was born in a male body but is now biologically female"
Are you saying that you are ok with a female to male transgender who has gone through the surgery and is on hormonal treatment, but not the same person who had not gone through transgender surgery/hormones? Do you mean someone who appears physically how they feel but not someone who appears different how they feel?
I think you are saying people who use the same toilets, if the toilets are separated by gender, should physically look the same, am I right?
closeupready
(29,503 posts)to get the gist of my meaning.
Cheers.
uppityperson
(115,681 posts)jberryhill
(62,444 posts)It can easily be done, because combining the floor space of mens' and womens' rooms, opens up additional design opportunities.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)closeupready
(29,503 posts)The bathroom is for anatomical men when a man is in there. It is the ladies room when an anatomical female is in there.
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)You have a unisex bathroom at home. Regardless of whomever is occupying it, it is the same room.
The thing with public bathrooms is that we do not have a gender problem. What we have is an architectural problem. Using the combined floor space and eliminating a wet wall for the plumbing, unisex bathrooms can be, and are in places I've seen them, designed to provide the same security and privacy that your unisex bathroom at home does.
A floor-to-ceiling divider, instead of the partial-wall stalls, a small shelf, maybe a small basin, a coathook or maybe a built-in hangar of some kind - think of an airplane bathroom. Airplane bathrooms are pretty small stalls, but you can, in addition to the basic purpose, arrange or change your clothing, fix your makeup, wash your hands and face, and all kinds of things in there.
NOBODY looks for sex-segregated bathrooms on trains, planes or at the county fair.
closeupready
(29,503 posts)I probably misunderstood the original question, so let's just close this side discussion noting that you've made some really good points. Cheers.
fizzgig
(24,146 posts)nc4bo
(17,651 posts)Wonder why anyone else would....
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)Daemonaquila
(1,712 posts)Anyone with a brain, that is.
But I guess there are a lot of morons. A friend's rescue dog came into their hands because a moron brought her to a vet to have her put down because she was a true hermaphrodite and the owner "didn't want to have to explain that to the kids."
Thinkingabout
(30,058 posts)because of long lines in Women's restrooms, usually someone watched the door since it may have made potential men from entering without knowing there are women currently using their facilities.
Lochloosa
(16,073 posts)Brickbat
(19,339 posts)99Forever
(14,524 posts)Recursion
(56,582 posts)It's incredibly perverse how the moral panic gets this exactly backwards.
samsingh
(17,601 posts)Solly Mack
(90,792 posts)Because I don't care. I've used unisex bathrooms with multiple stalls and never had a problem. When I have to go, I'm not concerned with the plumbing of those around me. My concerns are getting a reasonably clean stall and having toilet paper handy.
RadicalGeek
(344 posts)I go in, do my business. wash my hands, and get back to work, etc!
If they are with a pitbull and carrying leftovers from Olive Garden.
Seriously? No. I can't imagine anyone that I know that would even care. Holy hell.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Amazing how one perfectly nice human being can instill so much irrational fear.
Behind the Aegis
(54,013 posts)tap, tap, tap!
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)And not just to men
bluesbassman
(19,379 posts)Good one.
And no, I don't have any problem with sharing. When you gotta go, you gotta go!
get the red out
(13,468 posts)I go to a lot of dog activities and someone having their dog in the bathroom isn't that uncommon. Leftovers from Olive Garden? Some dog would find a way to grab that! (Probably mine).
Iggo
(47,577 posts)Not to check other people's plumbing.
Ykcutnek
(1,305 posts)But no, wouldn't be made any more or any less nervous because of someone who is transgender.
irisblue
(33,036 posts)biggest issue for me....wash your damn hands......only the crazy worry who is in the stall next to them...I got no time for that...WASH YOUR HANDS after is all I freakin care about
1StrongBlackMan
(31,849 posts)Guy bathroom code precludes even glancing in anoher occupant's direct. But then, I wouldn't have a problem sharing a restroom with ANYONE, including a female ... I'm in the restroom for reason and sex isn't it.
Skittles
(153,220 posts)at work....fine with it
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)they were taking a dump. Then, I'd hate the smell. Otherwise, I'm not a closed minded bigot who would have a problem with it. I can't believe this is an optional opinion on DU. Seems DU's policy is against discrimination and bigotry, as far as the rules go, anyhow. What juries might do is a whole 'nother ballgame. Too bad the transgender community on DU will have to read some of the usual suspects and their usual anti-trans crap, but I already know before reading the rest of the thread, there will be plenty here.
Spirochete
(5,264 posts)to socialize. I pay pretty much zero attention to anyone else who happens to be in there at the same time, so I doubt I'd even notice.
kestrel91316
(51,666 posts)And a trans person in the women's room would presumably have ZERO interest in me (but somebody correct me if I am wrong because I am confused by some trans relationships).
Really? Starving children in India, Ebola in Africa, poverty everywhere we look, chronically jobless Americans? And people wanna hassle trans persons? What the fuckety fuck is THAT about??
LawDeeDah
(1,596 posts)KinMd
(966 posts)SheilaT
(23,156 posts)and someone who appears to be a man is inside, I would be terribly bothered. Actually, that happened once to me many years ago and I told the guy to leave.
However, I might not actually know someone is transgendered, depending on their appearance.
But no, I would not be comfortable using a public restroom with someone who to me looks completely like a man. It's a sense of privacy that would be violated. For one thing, I don't know about the men's rooms, but a remarkable number of the stalls in the ladies' have broken latches and won't stay shut. I hate that.
AtomicKitten
(46,585 posts)I'm more concerned with people in the restroom that don't wash their hands. It is rampant.
theHandpuppet
(19,964 posts)That is just too gross.
Aerows
(39,961 posts)Human beings aren't allergic to soap and water, but some think taking the time to wash their hands is a nuisance.
Inkfreak
(1,695 posts)And at the reststops, the amount of dudes walking right by the sink after hitting the urinal is staggering. So gross. Bleh.
Aerows
(39,961 posts)what people were taught about hygiene, but basic is ... wash your hands after you use the restrooms!
Lex
(34,108 posts)theHandpuppet
(19,964 posts)The only things I'm concerned about are getting in and out of public bathrooms as quickly as possible and finding a place (other than the floor) to put my purse.
Warpy
(111,383 posts)I honestly have absolutely no problem sharing with a transvestite or a transsexual. I would much rather share than think of the problems they might face in a men's room.
LostInAnomie
(14,428 posts)I'll pee and poop in front of anyone. I'm enlightened that way.
Rex
(65,616 posts)Are they going to tell me?
JEB
(4,748 posts)Kalidurga
(14,177 posts)I would prefer to be alone though.
DebJ
(7,699 posts)I've almost not made it home sometimes in my attempts to avoid ever using them.
I used to manage restaurants and the filth I had to clean up behind.........ugh.
Nevernose
(13,081 posts)Or at my urinal?
Otherwise, why would I care?
The first time I went to Europe I quickly realized that the bathrooms were usually different. Shared sink facilities, for one thing, and in many establishments there was no seperation by sex or gender, just individual stalls.
ChazII
(6,206 posts)How often are sermons subpoenaed for any issue?
Initech
(100,108 posts)LostInAnomie
(14,428 posts)Calista241
(5,586 posts)Cause that just smells awful.
Egnever
(21,506 posts)yup.
DesertFlower
(11,649 posts)KittyWampus
(55,894 posts)Crunchy Frog
(26,679 posts)JoePhilly
(27,787 posts)Further down than I expected.
DreamGypsy
(2,252 posts)...back in the early 80's when I was working at a startup software company:
One of my coworkers (I'll call him Andy) had a bunch of the guys over for beer one evening. After a couple rounds he told us that he was taking a weeks vacation, but wouldn't showing up for work after that. "Andrea" would be taking over the position he filled and was expected to fulfill the role with the same expertise. Andy said that "the ultimate surgical consequences" of the decision wouldn't occur for a few months, so she had let the HR (Human Resources) people know about the transition and they had a hosted a meeting with the female employees to let them know about the "new person" appearing in the Ladies room. Apparently all the women understood and were supportive.
For the next year, there were no incidents, no misunderstandings, no objections....except for one jerk who could just not accept the reality and took every opportunity to make Andrea miserable. As a result of one person's bigotry, she left the company.
I look back on that experience with awe...at the courage, the determination, the self-realization of a person to become who they truly were.
Inkfreak
(1,695 posts)I'm one of those types who cringes using a public bathroom, period. I get all nervous about germs & other people. I gotta do the countdown thing..it's just uncomfortable for me.
But that's all on me. That's my problem. I don't care who uses the bathroom with me. I always use the stalls anyways. And I'm certainly not looking at anyone's gear. I'm
More into who washes their hands, if anything. I see you dudes walking right by the sink all the time. Gross.
Bonx
(2,078 posts)that my wife/niece/mother is in.
Nope. Don't like it at all.
KeepItReal
(7,769 posts)Who's got time to make societal judgements on people in the lavatory?!?!?
zappaman
(20,606 posts)And I state that from previous experience; ie, this is not a hypothetical question.
L-
rufus dog
(8,419 posts)if yes, then YES, if no, I don't care.
ZombieHorde
(29,047 posts)greatlaurel
(2,004 posts)pnwmom
(109,006 posts)Women have nothing to fear from transgender people.
But there are men who stalk women into bathrooms, and women are right to be cautious when a man is in the ladies' room, especially if a woman is alone.
Zorra
(27,670 posts)men don't bother to pick up the toilet seat before they pee, and end up peeing all over the seat, and it's really disgusting when I don't notice the seat is wet and sit down on toilet seat that's been peed on.
Not fun, can ruin my day.
I don't have any problem sharing public restrooms with women.
MadrasT
(7,237 posts)But here, women "squat and hover" and pee all over the seat all the time. Makes me batshit crazy. Being inconsiderate is not gender specific.
Zorra
(27,670 posts)I've lived in very rural areas of the west all my life, so maybe that's where the regional thing comes in. Maybe women peeing on toilet seats is some kind of urban thing, where there are more people, and where there is a great deal of anonymity.
I've only ever had this problem in unisex restrooms, particularly at events where alcohol is served. Or when I've had to use men's restrooms because the women's room was out of order. Sorry, but, eeewww.
snooper2
(30,151 posts)Are Mens Rooms Really Cleaner Than Womens Rooms?
Read more http://healthybodylife.com/932-mens-rooms-cleaner-womens-rooms/
Womens restrooms are dirtier than the mens
http://www.pcccourier.com/2013/10/23/watercloset/
Womens Restrooms the Dirtiest
http://numbertwoguide.com/womens-restrooms-the-dirtiest/
Same thing for the workplace-
TUCSON (AP) Your office desk harbors far more bacteria than your workplace restroom, and if you're a woman, chances are your workspace has more germs than your male co-workers', a new research report shows.
http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/health/2007-02-14-dirty-desks_x.htm
Zorra
(27,670 posts)tell us the same thing.
The past:
The Uncleanness of Women
19When a woman has a discharge, if her discharge in her body is blood, she shall continue in her menstrual impurity for seven days; and whoever touches her shall be unclean until evening. 20'Everything also on which she lies during her menstrual impurity shall be unclean, and everything on which she sits shall be unclean.
Ezekiel 36:17
"Son of man, when the people of Israel were living in their own land, they defiled it by their conduct and their actions. Their conduct was like a woman's monthly uncleanness in my sight.
The present (from one of your study articles:
http://healthybodylife.com/932-mens-rooms-cleaner-womens-rooms/
Seriously?
Same shit, different day.
I'll make a deal with you snoop, if you don't come into women's bathrooms and piss all over our toilet seats, I won't come into men's bathrooms and get my scary woman germs on your toilet seats.
TDale313
(7,820 posts)Prophet 451
(9,796 posts)My problem is not with the person being trans, my problem is with having anyone in the bathroom at the same time as me. I know that sounds like either complete nonsense or a cover for prejudice but I'm mentally ill and one of my *quirks* (as my SO describes them) is being unable to use a public bathroom if there's anyone in there with me.
B Calm
(28,762 posts)pipi_k
(21,020 posts)I'm the same way.
I wouldn't care about a TG person using the same restroom I'm in, but I have trouble peeing if someone else is in there. Or, let's say, I used to. To the point where I would wad up tp and try to pee on it to silence the noise. Now I just try to direct the stream to the front of the bowl where there isn't any/much water.
I will not dump in a public restroom unless absolutely necessary.
Years ago when I was having trouble with IBS, I had an attack. Went into a fast food place where there was a line outside the ladies room. Well, it was a single-person bathroom. Thought I would die! Finally got inside where I let loose. Had no matches to light to cover up the aroma, had to open the door and walk past a whole line of women to get the hell out. They all knew what had happened in there. Honestly, the fumes were disgusting.
My only consolation was that the restaurant was in an area that I don't normally travel (on a camping trip) so I knew I'd never see any of them again.
madokie
(51,076 posts)I try to stay out of public bathrooms and when I have to use one its an in and out affair for me. No lingering nor loitering nor paying attention to anyone else there
Retrograde
(10,164 posts)while she was re-applying makeup, but that's a California thing (wasting water during a drought is a big no-no here).
But otherwise, no, not after being in one-for-all restrooms in Europe.
B Calm
(28,762 posts)on the toilet seat.
democrank
(11,112 posts)someone like Dick Cheney. The country needs to get their "problem people" straight.
Maedhros
(10,007 posts)Would creep me out.
mr blur
(7,753 posts)merrily
(45,251 posts)Last edited Thu Oct 16, 2014, 07:02 AM - Edit history (1)
as to males, females, transgenders, etc. The rest is only sound and I assume transgenders, like everyone else, gets that I probably entered the stall to relieve myself, or to adjust some garment that I'd rather adjust in private, so that is not an issue for me, either.
Anyone is welcome to wash and dry their hands stand in the same restroom as I wash and dry mine. I don't use the mirror much, but I have no problem with that either.
And, btw, I assume that, at some point, I may have been in a public bathroom with a lesbian without knowing it. AFAIK, Neither of us seemed to give a, um, to care. BTW, would I even know if I am in the restroom with a transgender, as opposed to a transvestite? Either way, all the above applies.
I would really rather not share a public rest room, or anything else, with a murderer or thief or rapist or an asshole, um, unredeemable jerk, or someone who is carrying a serious contagious disease,* but no one ever seems to ask me about that.
ETA: meaning a disease that I might actually pick up just by using the same restroom, not one I only imagine I might pick up that way.
bklyncowgirl
(7,960 posts)FarPoint
(12,466 posts)As long as the restroom has stall doors for privacy... Oh, I won't share my mascara...
eShirl
(18,505 posts)I like privacy, the more the better
Rhinodawg
(2,219 posts)In_The_Wind
(72,300 posts)sendero
(28,552 posts)..... I am not waving my junk around and am not expecting to see anyone else doing so.
So no, I really don't care and to be honest I doubt I would have any way of knowing to begin with.
HughBeaumont
(24,461 posts)I want solitude. I've always found the concept of strangers shitting in the same proximity in an enclosed space creepy and uncomfortable.
Luckily, this building has 18 floors.
City Lights
(25,171 posts)We need more gender neutral bathrooms in public places.
RobinA
(9,898 posts)However, I can live without unisex bathrooms. Not that I'm above using a Men's Room if it's empty and the line at the Ladies Room is 10 people deep. And I have somebody to guard the door.
Vinca
(50,318 posts)LeftinOH
(5,359 posts)don't leave "remnants" in the bowl, and wash their hands before leaving.
Lots of NON-trans people don't seem to understand these essentials.
Rex
(65,616 posts)Please.
ryan_cats
(2,061 posts)Doesn't bother me but I can see it be abused big time by young punks who want to use the female restroom and predators as well.
I have no idea how to solve the problem though. Having transsexual bathrooms reminds me of 'coloreds only'.
bigwillq
(72,790 posts)MineralMan
(146,338 posts)get the red out
(13,468 posts)And I probably wouldn't even recognize that they were transgender. I don't inspect others very closely in the BATHROOM.
hedgehog
(36,286 posts)AngryAmish
(25,704 posts)In that case they have to go to the gas station.
CAG
(1,820 posts)dilby
(2,273 posts)For the most part it's really hard to tell when a guy used to be a woman.
angel823
(409 posts)Some of these pastors around here need to pay attention to the many other issues we have in our community that need some attention.
WWJP (where would Jesus poop)?
I don't think Jesus would mind using a public bathroom with someone who is transgender.
Angel in Texas
Scout
(8,624 posts)but no it wouldn't bother me if i did know.
i'm in a stall anyway, so what's to be bothered by?
Gothmog
(145,666 posts)n/t
NCTraveler
(30,481 posts)LeftInTX
(25,607 posts)I had gone swimming and was pretty much in my birthday suit and quick grabbed my towel. Fortunately, someone who didn't speak English, managed to reassure me with: "That's a she"
Chan790
(20,176 posts)Not at all. I'm a vocal supporter of implementation of more unisex public restrooms in order to make this less of an issue.
nolabear
(41,995 posts)I've been throwing a FB fit over this tripe. Those poor beleaguered pastors had sermons subpoenaed in a case THEIR side brought to suit to protect their right to discriminate against trans people. They just don't believe that people can be the sex they are, but have to be the one those people have assigned to them.
Donald Ian Rankin
(13,598 posts)What determines whether I feel comfortable or uncomfortable is whether I feel *I* have a right to be there, not who else is there.
I'm not sure I'm representative in that, though.
hifiguy
(33,688 posts)of a hoot? Only the brain-dead fundies worry about crap like this. They need some heavy therapy and/or powerful medications if they give a shit about this. Or maybe a detox from their jebus addiction.
Tikki
Faux pas
(14,697 posts)not at all.
msanthrope
(37,549 posts)Stellar
(5,644 posts)How would I know? My husband used to tell me that I never paid attention to anything or anybody. I think that's one of my problems.
LittleBlue
(10,362 posts)Then again, I really don't care who walks into the men's restroom. Nothing they haven't seen before.
yellowcanine
(35,702 posts)If not, probably not.
Response to edhopper (Original post)
Post removed
intaglio
(8,170 posts)stevenleser
(32,886 posts)It feels awkward for 20 seconds, then you never feel awkward again.
cbdo2007
(9,213 posts)It would save a lot of wasted space.
logosoco
(3,208 posts)with anyone!
RiffRandell
(5,909 posts)REP
(21,691 posts)That's not what I'm there for.
jmondine
(1,649 posts)Rhetorical. I know that our own prudish past coupled with modern rabid bigotry is the source of this bullshit "controversy".
Drayden
(146 posts)Ask this: why is it OK for biological males who happen to be transgendered to state they are uncomfortable using the restroom with other biological males, but it isn't OK for biological females to state they are uncomfortable using a restroom with biological males, transgendered or otherwise?
Warren Stupidity
(48,181 posts)REP
(21,691 posts)A transwoman may feel unsafe around cisgendered men - TG people have been assaulted and even killed for being TG. Going into a men's bathroom isn't something a lot of women - TG or cisgendered - would want to do, unless things were desperate and the men's room was empty.
If you don't understand why a woman would feel uncomfortable or even scared going alone into a men's bathroom - well, I don't know how to explain it to you.
Drayden
(146 posts)Would feel threatened by having men come into the women's bathroom. Men, even transgendered men who still possess the original biological equipment, can simply unzip a fly and hang their junk and pee. Women have to unfasten and drop trou and sit. And forget about dealing with periods. As a woman, yes I would feel vulnerable sharing a restroom with strange men. And fear that any pervert could don a wig and dress to gain access to the lady's room. Now an actual transgendered male wouldn't bother me, but having the precedent of men in women's bathrooms would. And for women who have suffered through sexual assault, the fear may be even worse. Far more women are sexually assaulted than even transgendered biological males.
Warren Stupidity
(48,181 posts)the person in that stall was "hanging their junk" as you put it. You do that a lot? Because the only thing that really creeps me out in a public bathroom is some person walking around checking out what sort of equipment is in use.
Drayden
(146 posts)I cited the anatomical difference between how bio men pee compared to women to show that women are generally more vulnerable than men in restrooms. As an aside that is completely unimportant, there is a sound difference between how women and men pee as well. But that isn't important. Picture being a 5'2 woman walking into a rest stop bathroom at night and it is filled with men. Most women would be intimidated. Now a transgendered person using the opposite genital restroom isn't alarming in and of themselves, assuming the person is truly transegenderd. But if the precedent is set that men with women's clothing and wigs can enter restrooms, it isn't a stretch to think predators will take advantage of that. Right now a man in the women's bathroom would put people on alert, it isn't allowed and you can act on it if it happens. Laws meant to be partial to transgendered bio males could change that. We can't just cast aside the safety of women, who make up 1/2 the population, for the comfort of the maybe .5% of the population that make up transgendered males. If changes are made they need to be evaluated throughly and decided with the safety of women in mind. If transgendered women who are biological males feel uncomfortable using a restroom with other biological males, we need to accept biological females also feel very uncomfortable sharing a restroom with biological males. No, multi-occupant unisex restrooms will not be acceptable for me, too much danger for women.
MillennialDem
(2,367 posts)First of all, please change your language. Biologically male is ok to use but transgendered male is not (unless you are referring to a female to male).
Secondly, just because some of us have penises does not mean we stand to pee in a public toilet. In fact, the last thing I want to do when in a public women's bathroom is stand to pee and get the cops called on me. Moreover, many trans women do carry notes from their doctors stating what is going on so if some dude in a wig walks into a women's bathroom and you call the cops on him he's going to get in trouble.
And honestly, I look 100% female with my clothes on. What the hell do you think is going to happen to me if I walk into a men's bathroom? I'm pretty much guaranteed to be verbally harassed, assaulted, or have the cops called on me. Of course, the reality of the matter is I use the same bathroom to piss as you and you never know it, so it's a what you don't know won't hurt you thing.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Thank you for that classy (and informative) post.
I would have been far less kind.
MillennialDem
(2,367 posts)Drayden
(146 posts)What I don't want is unisex multistall bathrooms to become the norm. I'm fine with unisex single bathrooms, but that isn't always feasible for large venues.
As far as men dressing up in drag to harass women, that has happened. Transgendered doesn't bother me, I have never read of a transgendered bio-male sexually assaulting a women. I'm just pointing out why women would have issues sharing restrooms with men.
MillennialDem
(2,367 posts)any time soon, if ever in our lifetimes.
There have been trans women (and trans men) who have assaulted people, we're human just like anyone else and have our people with mental health problems and of course sociopaths, but there have been cis women who have assaulted women too.
As for men dressing up in drag to harass women in a bathroom, that is a separate issue from trans people. It's sick as hell and wrong - but it would happen even if there was a men's bathroom, women's bathroom, and trans person's bathroom.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)gollygee
(22,336 posts)Not a transgender man.
I think the thought that there are bunches of cisgender men dressing as women to gain access to women's rooms is a bit silly.
Transgender women are way too frequently victims of violence, and a men's room would be a dangerous place for them. They should absolutely be in the women's room. We have separate stalls, so no one is seeing us change tampons - your worry about menstruation causing us to only want to have women who were assigned the sex of female at birth in the bathroom with us is ridiculous. We aren't dealing with that in front of anyone else.
Warren Stupidity
(48,181 posts)onecaliberal
(32,929 posts)valerief
(53,235 posts)I'd have a problem with a pitbull there.
LostOne4Ever
(9,290 posts)Why should I?
Lil Missy
(17,865 posts)Turbineguy
(37,374 posts)I attend to my own physical needs. I honestly do not have the inclination or the energy to see or care what other people are doing as long as they are not drawing attention to themselves in some way (like shooting people).
damnedifIknow
(3,183 posts)Marrah_G
(28,581 posts)TorchTheWitch
(11,065 posts)How would one know if a transgender person was in there anyway?
Lost In America
(51 posts)can go fuck themselves.
Preaching hate and intolerance has jumped the shark.
Perhaps they should just be burned at the stake for general purposes?
undergroundpanther
(11,925 posts)Men have been in a restroom with me . They didn't notice a transman was in there. I dunno how often people in bathrooms notice other genders are there.I think people need to grow up and get past the binary gender bullshit. Call rapists rapists and quit confusing transpeople with rapists.Either sex can be raped.All rapists rape but all transgender people are NOT rapists.I wish people would stop assuming having a transgendered identity means someone is a rapist asshole.
phylny
(8,390 posts)Am I going #1 or #2? Because my #2 might freak her out.
No, I'm just funnin' ya. I would not have any objection at all.
Eleanors38
(18,318 posts)One wondered why there was a urinal in the women's room. I offered an opinion, and she scooted out. The others roared away as if all was routine. No big deal.
TexasMommaWithAHat
(3,212 posts)Men's bathrooms, female bathrooms, family bathrooms, and single stall unisex bathrooms are just fine with me. But a unisex bathroom with multiple stalls?
No thanks.
Whatever gender the transperson identifies as should be able to use that gendered bathroom.