Of course I’ll win, I’m the white guy.” Satire

[malaise]

http://www.freewoodpost.com/2012/05/22/romney-of-course-ill-win-im-the-white-guy/

What could have been a game changing moment in Mitt Romney’s campaign turned into a horrendous gaffe Tuesday afternoon when the former governor was having lunch with a few of his supporters. Romney was hoping to show America how well he relates to the average working American by having a press recorded lunch at a local pancake house in rural Kentucky where the primary elections were taking place. However, what turned from a nice preplanned lunch with “common-folk conversation” ended up getting off track when one of Romney’s supporters asked him how he was so certain he would win.Romney turned to the man seated on his left and seemingly forgetting the ten plus reporters in the room said, “Well between you and me, we have to think about the reality of the situation. Obama is a popular guy and his supporters are hell-bent in getting him reelected. There is one thing that his campaign seems to keep forgetting over and over, and that is how many Americans can’t stand the guy for an obvious reason. Of course I’ll win, I’m the white guy.”

The Romney supporter looked at Romney with a look of agreement yet bewilderment. The chatter within the room got quite loud as reporters grabbed at their phones and took rapid notes. It’s not every day that a candidate is so brutally honest with his supporters.

One of Romney’s aides quickly tapped the former governor on the shoulder and whispered something into his ear. Romney’s face had a stone cold expression that can only be described as terrified. After talking with his aide for a minute or so, Romney turned back to the table and smiled saying, “It’s a good thing we all know how to take a joke here, huh? Of course the reason that I know I’m going to win in because I’m the guy that will stand up for true conservative values and economic prosperity. Which of course is what the American people will want come November.”
-----------------
Hahahaha - I fell for it - it's satire - my bad

[derby378]

1. Wait a second...

This is like The Onion, isn't it? It don't belong here.

[malaise]

2. You know I can't wait to see his concession speech

What a fugging racist.

[malaise]

11. You would hope

Tone deaf doesn't describe this racist

[ZombieHorde]

22. Yes, Freewood is satire, just like the onion. nt

[greatauntoftriplets]

3. He didn't really, did he?

Last edited Wed May 23, 2012, 08:54 PM - Edit history (1)

My God, the man is tone deaf. McCain was a white guy too and we all know how that ended.

Oh drat! I can hear him saying it, though.

[drm604]

4. Just like the last white guy won.

[lumberjack_jeff]

6. This is a joke, right? Right? n/t

[cali]

15. otherwise known as satire. It's beyond fucking pathetic how often people here fall

for obvious satire. I mean for fuck's sake, the top of the site reads "NEWS THAT"S ALMOST RELIABLE". And now we'll be treated to the same lame ass "but it could be true" from those who were dupes.

[Orangepeel]

18. Yes, a bad one. It is a poor attempt at satire.

[cali]

8. I won't be sending this anywhere. it's SATIRE. Hard to find more obvious satire

The huge honking "NEWS THAT"S ALMOST RELIABLE" is a huge honking CLUE.

Sheesh.

[Webster Green]

9. Ah jeez.

That's a satire site. I was falling for it though.

Too good to be true.

[malaise]

29. I fell for it

[yellerpup]

10. I actually clutched my pearls over this one.

Then I notice that freewood is a satirical website. Ya got me!

[malaise]

16. Shit - I just realized that

LOL

[yellerpup]

32. And YOU posted it!

I needed a laugh.

[malaise]

35. I'm laughing at me too

[yellerpup]

36. To be fair, it did sound like something Mittens would say.

[PSPS]

12. Do you realize that the story is satire?

[malaise]

20. I didn't and I'm not easily fooled

Received it by email from a good friend and never checked the site.

My bad.

[The Second Stone]

13. This is satire and fiction, right?

It's written as a straight news story.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

14. Hello, folks, this is satire.

Unfortunately it's also an example of Poe's Law.

[malaise]

26. I edited the OP

Fell for it hook, line and sinker

[Cali_Democrat]

17. Is this for real?

[drm604]

19. I'm skeptical.

I think that website is questionable as a source. Here's another story from that website.

http://www.freewoodpost.com/2012/03/07/bananas-and-cucumbers-deemed-too-sexual-and-will-soon-be-banned-from-some-shelves-in-tennessee

Bananas and Cucumbers Deemed “Too Sexual” and Will Soon Be Banned From Some Shelves in Tennessee

[malaise]

21. I edited the OP

It is satire - I fell for it

[MichiganVote]

23. So the real State of the Union address: "My Fellow White Americans.."

[Nye Bevan]

24. Those "Onion" wannabe sites are pathetic imitations of the original (nt)

[Blecht]

31. +1

Pathetic isn't a strong enough word.

[salparadise1000]

38. why?

Last I checked the internets were a pretty big thing, yet you seem to imply that there is only room for a single satire site. Also, the Onion has many funny things, but some others leave me with nothing more
than a faint smile. Disclosure - I am a regular contributor FWP. Many of the things we publish are more daring than anything The Onion has put out in years.

[Logical]

25. Change the title or self delete!

[marasinghe]

27. dude, freewoodpost's disclaimer:

http://www.freewoodpost.com/disclaimer/

".... Free Wood Post is a news and political satire web publication, which may or may not use real names, often in semi-real or mostly fictitious ways. All news articles contained within FreeWoodPost.com are fiction, and presumably fake news.

Any resemblance to the truth is purely coincidental, except for all references to politicians and/or celebrities, in which case they are based on real people, but still based almost entirely in fiction ...."

[malaise]

28. Edited the OP

[marasinghe]

37. i fell for it first go, too.

[Blecht]

30. Not funny

This is idiotic. It's not funny, and you should delete the post.

[99th_Monkey]

33. Crap! I was about to launch a campaign to make this viral. never-mind. ~nt

[TrogL]

34. This really happened...

...in recent Provincial elections in Alberta. It's been called one of the "bozo moments" that cost the Wild Rose Party the election.

The candidate in question blogged that he had an advantage over other candidates because he is Caucasian