Was informed today that my mom has stomach cancer.

[Puzzledtraveller]

I am not with her because she lives in Texas with the majority of our blood family and I live in Kentucky. I am thankful that my older sisters are there to keep her company and see her to her doctor visits. It was said that surgery is definite and they will remove the entire stomach. We are also waiting on results to determine if there has been any spread. She is old and has lost weight so she is already in a high risk category. I do not know what to expect. What I should prepare myself for. Beside my wife and close relatives I do not have anyone to share this with. I decided to share this here because I know DU is a caring bunch of people.

How ever you may please think about her, her name is Gloria.

[ScreamingMeemie]

1. Oh PT... she will be thought about here...

as will you... I will hope with all my heart that they caught it early.

[peacebird]

2. My father in law is 78 and just had surgery to remove half his stomach and esophagus due to cancer

He was out of the hospital after a week, but is back in for fluid in chest cavity now. I am sorry to hear about your mom. My FIL is doing better than expected so far, but the situation is fluid.... How old is Gloria?

we will add Gloria to our chain of positive thoughts!

[Puzzledtraveller]

4. She is 78 too.

[peacebird]

6. Gloria is in our thoughts & prayers!

We were lucky enough to be able to travel from Virginia to Washington state to be here for surgery and first three weeks of recovery. For that we are grateful!
It is hard to live so far away from the parents as we age......

[Major Nikon]

3. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best

Go to see her as often as you can. Call often and talk about things that will lift her spirits.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

5. My good thoughts go out to Gloria and to your whole family, my dear Puzzledtraveller...

I hope for the best possible outcome.

And also that she may be pain-free and comfortable, no matter what.

[Liberal_in_LA]

7. sending good vibes to your family

[malaise]

8. Sending positive vibes

Speak with her as often as you can and try and go and see her.
This is very serious.

[Waldorf]

9. I hope things go well for her. I've been fighting cancer now for nearly 5 years and I'm 51.

Cancer sucks but I'm still giving it the middle finger.

Be strong Gloria!

[Lochloosa]

26. .l.

Just helping out.

[Mnemosyne]

36. Good thoughts for your mom, PT. And good thoughts to you also, Waldorf.

Welcome to DU!

[niyad]

50. welcome to du-- good for you on the middle finger--may you be able to salute that way for

many years to come!

[stage left]

54. Good wishes to you, too.

And the strength to go on fighting.

[ms liberty]

10. Sending vibes to Gloria...

And to you and your family!

[Solly Mack]

11. I'm sorry to hear that, Pt.

You'll both be in my thoughts.

[dorkzilla]

12. Healing thoughts for Gloria!!

My mom had stage 4 Non-hodgkins lymphoma and beat it, even though initially they’d given her several months to live. Over 6 years now since her diagnosis and she scans cancer free for the past 5 years. One of my dearest friends was diagnosed with liver cancer 20 years ago...we’re going to dinner this weekend.

Good outcomes can and do happen.

[flamingdem]

62. Me too!

My mom is doing really well after surviving the same cancer same stage. Years have gone by and I feel so lucky for the extra time that she didn't expect!

[dorkzilla]

67. Science is amazing!

I was recently diagnosed with MS and I get a weekly newsletter with all the clinical trials etc; it's amazing what medical science is able to do today that was impossible just a few years ago.

So glad our moms are still around and hopefully Gloria will be too!

[Person 2713]

13. They can do so much now days . Try to keep informed from your sisters so you know day by day

if you can't be there. Good thoughts to you your family and of course Gloria

[Puzzledtraveller]

18. Thank you.

We are going to go down my wife and 17 month old daughter. I am not sure how. My daughter doesn't do well in the care for any length of time and I think a flight would be impossible with her. But we have to bring her with us. I'm her only son to have a child and her and I were both worried it would never happen but it did and thankfully while my mom is still with us.

[Person 2713]

23. Bet she would like to see that little baby girl right about now .

safe trip

[TBF]

72. Any chance you could take bus or train?

I used to give my son benadryl (normal dose) when we would fly when he was young. He'd be out like a light and stewardesses would just smile as they passed. The nice thing about bus or train is that it frees up you and wife to deal with child if she is awake. Will keep you all in my thoughts.

[Puzzledtraveller]

79. Thank you.

I think we will drive and just stay a long the way as needed. I believe we can make it with two overnight stays that would break the trip up into manageable segments for her.We will be coming from Louisville to San Antonio. Thank you again for your concern and kind words.

[LNM]

98. Try driving overnight

My daughter and son-in-law drove their 1 year old from the Twin Cities to Rapid City, SD. I think it's about 10 hours. On the way out they left at about 4 am and took several stops along the way. On the way back they left about 11pm and drove all night. Baby was fine both ways.

Best wishes for healing for your mom. I think an a poster above was right that she'd want to see the little one.

[Puzzledtraveller]

102. That's what we are thinking.

I know she wants to see all of us but I know seeing her granddaughter will really lift her spirits. She only got to see her when she was born when she came up from Texas. That was April last year. Thank you for the kind words and advice.

[shenmue]

14. ...

[vankuria]

15. I'm sorry...

but please try and stay positive, especially when you are around your mom. I'm glad your mom has the immediate support of your sisters, to keep her company and see to her medical needs. You should also make it a point to be in close touch with your mom, family and her Dr.'s. I wish I could help more, but it's tough when our parents get old and start dealing with all kinds of health issues. Please stay strong, prayers and healing thoughts for you and your sweet mom Gloria.

[Puzzledtraveller]

20. Thank you, any advice really does help.

[PMR808]

25. Sending positive vibes your way

positive vibes are coming your way. Take one day at a time, cancer treatment is very tiring and exhausting, and most cancer centers/hospitals have support groups for family members and children whose family members are living with cancer. Stay positive and have her watch something that makes her laugh. Be there for her, it is going to be a journey, get as much information about her treatment plan and talk to doctors/nurses if you can, it makes the whole thing a tad bit less threatening

[riderinthestorm]

16. Healing thoughts coming Gloria's way!

Vibes for peace and wisdom during these hard times for you and your sisters...



Stay strong. There's so much they can do these days.

[Demeter]

17. Thoughts and prayers for your whole family, Traveller

We are here for you, truly.

[Siwsan]

19. My heartfelt sympathy goes to you

And deep empathy. I have had to deal with cancer, in my family, more than I care to remember. I hope you will keep us posted and maybe joint the DU Cancer Support group. I joined it when my sister was diagnosed with cancer, for the 3rd time. People were a great help, both with advice and also with with words of comfort.

I will keep Gloria in my highest thoughts and wish her and your family all of the strength that they will need.

[livetohike]

21. Holding you, your family and Mom Gloria in my thoughts for

strength, comfort and peace as you all face this health challenge .

[yardwork]

22. I am so sorry.

[840high]

24. I'll keep her in my prayers.

[SoapBox]

27. Thinking of Mom, you and your family.

Stay strong...I know it's hard but everyone needs everyone in these situations.

I miss my Mom terribly...please give yours all the support you can.

[Puzzledtraveller]

28. Thank you all, it really does help

to see your reply's and well wishes, the advice.

[madokie]

29. good ole

madokie healing thoughts headed her, you and your families way.

[babylonsister]

30. Love and light sent to you and Gloria!

[Tab]

31. Please, if you can

visit us over in the Cancer forum.

I'll be thinking and wishing the best for your mother and you as well.

[irisblue]

32. ((Gloria))((PuzzledTraveler))

positive energy for your mother & her caregivers

[roguevalley]

33. First of all, if you can, try not to waste energy on worry. I found that out the

hard way with my dad's three cancers. Your mama is in my prayers. So are you. just wait as best you can for the results. Keep your spirits up. If you can go, make a trip. HOWEVER. If things prevent you from going, finances and the like, DON'T BLAME YOURSELF no matter what happens. Sometimes life sucks that much. Call her a lot. Send her little things in the mail that she likes. Keep up communication among the siblings. Until you have data, its all a waiting game. I will pray for your mama, Gloria, and send her and you all healing thoughts.

[Puzzledtraveller]

37. Thank you.

your words really helped.

[Warpy]

34. I don't know what "old" means

but if she's over 85, have her ask about palliative care. That means keeping her comfortable without heroics to extend her life. It can include things like radiation to shrink the tumor but generally doesn't include high risk surgery.

She might want everything done, in which case you can expect her to have a long convalescence, probably in a skilled nursing facility where they will work to get her nutrition set up and her activity increased.

Having our parents get old and ill is tough to deal with, especially at a distance. Been there, done that, and I was an only so it was all on me.

[Puzzledtraveller]

35. Thank you.

She is 78, and the major concern voiced by the doctor is her weight and then the weight loss that will come with the surgery. She is able to take care of herself at this point as far as moving around unassisted, drive short distances if need be and is active to the point she still mows her own lawn. Thank you for sharing a little of your experience. I can't imagine going through this alone.

[Warpy]

40. At 78, she has a better chance of survivng the surgery

especially since she's otherwise healthy and very active. They might bring her in a few days early for IV nutrition to try to build her up a bit. She might also need transfusions to improve her chances. This is if the cancer isn't terribly aggressive.

[brer cat]

38. Sending positive vibes

for Gloria as well as for you and your family. I think the best preparation is to be ready to accept what your mother decides because ultimately this is about her life and how she chooses to live it now. She may be mentally and physically strong enough to aggressively fight this horrible disease, or she may choose the quality of life that pain management can bring. Both are legitimate alternatives that she is best able to select.

Call often, visit if you possibly can, and be sure to hug and thank your sisters.

[cherokeeprogressive]

39. Get better Gloria! {{{{VIBES}}}} coming your way!

[DrBulldog]

41. This is exactly why I stopped drinking all soda pop several years ago.

The years of heavily drinking it slowly created acidosis and corroded my stomach lining to the point of feeling pain.

If I had continued, the condition would have become pre-cancerous. This is how many stomach cancers begin: from the diet.

I stopped in time. Today the only beverage I drink is tea, take melatonin daily, and my stomach is completely healthy.

[Half-Century Man]

42. I'm a long term cancer surviver. 15 years.

I was devastated financially.
Protect whatever assets she has, get it into trust funds and such ASAP.

A very common side issue in cancer patients is depression. Make sure she get visitors. If she has a circle of friends, reach out to them and encourage visitations. If/when she gets outings, gather family and do something.
She will be facing a lot of changes in her eating habits. Find her recipes to put variety into what will be a blander diet.

Cancer is the biggest scariest medical monster out there, but it is beaten all the time. She has to believe she can beat it. She has to be able to "play through the pain".
I'm not going to bullshit you, this will be a fight.

Hope and strength to Gloria.

[bkkyosemite]

43. Love, light and prayers for

your mother Gloria and for you.

[Dustlawyer]

44. If she is in Houston I hope it is the MD Cancer Center. I am VERY skeptical of doctors

but I have a huge respect for the ones at MD Anderson. There isn't a better place to be in the country if you have cancer! There are a lot of things wrong with my state as everyone knows, but top notch hospitals are usually not one of them.

[MADem]

45. Go see her. If you can't go see her, do the skype. If you can't do the skype, get on the phone.

Reach out, communicate, stay close.

I hope she comes through OK. I had a relative that had a large portion of the stomach removed (this was eons ago, in the dark ages of medicine) and she lived for another forty years. Don't give up hope.

[spanone]

46. ....

[MsMAC]

47. I'll add your mother to my prayer list from today on. I hope you

are able to see her.

[mia]

48. Gloria will be in my thoughts and prayers.

I know that it's a hard time for you, Puzzledtraveler. Best wishes to you and your family.

[renate]

49. I'm sorry about your bad news

What a shock that must have been.

She will be in my thoughts--and my prayers, if you want them --and so will you, because this is hard on you too.

Best wishes to you all.

[Puzzledtraveller]

82. Thank you

I do pray and my faith does provide comfort and my family gladly accepts yours.

[niyad]

51. good thoughts and healing vibes for your mom, and prayers for strength for all of you.

please continue to let us know how she, and you, are doing.

[tavernier]

52. Second of all, I am paying back

to all the kindness I received from DU when my dad was ill last year and passed days before Christmas.

First of all, my wishes go out to you and your mother for the very best to come to you both!! I picture a Merry-go-round and you are both riding it, all smiles and laughter. I don't know why I see this, but you must have a very strong circle of love.

💖💖💖

[Puzzledtraveller]

61. Thank you!

[stage left]

53. Good thoughts going out to your Mom, Gloria.

And to you.

[Omaha Steve]

55. Yes we do care

My mom was in and out of the hospital her last two years. I got a lot of support.

They didn't figure out her cancer until her last two weeks. That was all the time she had in hospice.

I wish your mom Gloria the best care and lot of chimney sweep luck with a little that rubs off on you.

OS

[retrowire]

56. My wife and I are sending love your way PT. :) n/t

[passiveporcupine]

57. I'm so sorry to hear this

When you are that old, surgery can be totally debilitating. Even if she survives the cancer with surgery, it may just take too much out of her. It may depend a lot on how mobile, fit and active she was up to now.

I know that being at a distance is tough too.

[Glimmer of Hope]

58. So sorry about your mom!

I am currently fighting cancer myself and think one of the most important things is to find a medical team that is confident and caring. My team of doctors and nurses have made the process more manageable and stress free than I ever thought it would be. I hope your mother's treatment goes smoothly!

[niyad]

75. good thoughts and healing vibes for you, as well.

[Glimmer of Hope]

95. Thank you! I am doing very well.

[Samantha]

59. I will say a prayer for Gloria and for you and your family as well

If I were you, I would focus on the fact that you have had a mom in your life for so many years. You are very lucky in that regard. Try to keep a positive mindset. I don't know if you jog, if not, perhaps you can take long walks to keep your spirits up. Some days are going to be harder than others, so be prepared for that. I think those that suggested you join DU's cancer support group gave you great advice. This website has a wonderful way of picking people up when things are so hard.

Good luck to you, and I hope you keep us posted.

Sam

[lpbk2713]

60. Wishing Mom all the best.

Please remember your fellow DUers are with you on this.

[WillowTree]

63. I lost my Mom to stomach cancer. It's a tough one.

They call it a "silent cancer" because often it's in fairly advanced stages before there are symptoms that would cause medics to go looking for it. Also, it usually doesn't start in the stomach, but has traveled there from somewhere else. They traced my Mother's back to her liver as the original source.

All of that said, there is so much that they can do for the various cancers now. I would be surprised if there weren't numerous new treatments for this cancer that weren't out there for us when we went through it. One good thing is that MD Anderson is one of the leaders in cancer treatment and, even if your Mother can't get there, hopefully she can get hooked up with an oncologist connected to them.

Will be praying for your family. Meanwhile, be sure that you and your sisters take good care of yourselves, too, so you can do the things that need to be done for her and everyone around her.

[Puzzledtraveller]

80. Thank you WillowTree for sharing that.

[workinclasszero]

64. I said a prayer for Gloria

I hope and pray she can recover.

[mahina]

65. Good luck to Gloria and you and your family.

Medicine has come a long way lately. Hoping she is comfortable.

[etherealtruth]

66. You and your mom are in my thoughts

This is very, very hard and i am sorry. I also am hopeful

[madamvlb]

68. I will keep Gloria and your family in my thoughts.

[magical thyme]

69. hugs and healing light to ((Gloria)) and to you and the rest of your family, ((PT))

[glinda]

70. ...

[bullwinkle428]

71. K&R. My own mother turns 78 this year. She's been blessed with amazing health

for the most part over the years, but with each passing year, I become more and more aware of her own mortality.

[hedgehog]

73. I'm so sorry you and your mother

are going through this with such distance between you.

[TygrBright]

74. Will hold you and your family in the Light. n/t

[bearssoapbox]

76. Here's hoping for the best.

Don't forget to take care of yourself too.

[Xyzse]

77. Damn, I am so sorry.

Prayers/Positive vibes are sent.

[trusty elf]

78. I'm so very sorry to hear that.

[wendylaroux]

81. Oh Puzzledtraveller, I am so sorry!!!

I wish you and your wonderful Mother,love,peace, and all the best!

[LongTomH]

83. My thoughts are with you and your mom.

[femmocrat]

84. Sending best wishes to your mother and your family.

[No Vested Interest]

85. Prayers and good thoughts for Gloria, and Puzzledtraveller and family.

You've received a lot of good thoughts and advice here already.

There is a Prayer Circle on DU, if you wish that help.
May you have a safe and easy trip to be with your Mom, Gloria, and your sisters.
They will welcome your support, as you welcome theirs.
Be not afraid.
Peace.

[joanbarnes]

86. So sorry, wish by sharing we could help...sending thoughts of comfort.

[PasadenaTrudy]

87. Here's a link

to a message board that really helped me when my sister had pancreatic cancer. I'm posting the stomach cancer link:

http://www.cancercompass.com/message-board/cancers/stomach-cancer/1,0,119,9.htm


I'll be thinking of your mom

[a kennedy]

88. D*mn.

Positive thoughts and prayers for your mom and your family.

[Puzzledtraveller]

92. Thank you Pasadena Trudy

this is all very helpful.

[Oldtimeralso]

89. You and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers

and you stay strong as I know your mom wants especially for that little one. Remember, she is our future.

[JDPriestly]

90. Sending positive thoughts your way.

[clamshells]

91. I'm sorry, however, my elderly grandmother

had most of her stomach removed due to cancer and lived quite a few years after that, traveling around the country in an rv. She was always thin and frail looking, her whole life, so I would not assume that we old ladies are not tough birds.

[LoisB]

93. Positive vibes to your mom, hugs to you. Hope for the best.

[ProfessorGAC]

94. Good Thoughts

My MiL had that too. They removed part of the stomach. She lived another few years, but she had many GI issues over the years and she just kind of broke down after the surgery. Per the doctors, the surgery was a complete success and she did get a few years she wouldn't otherwise have had.

[secondwind]

96. So truly sorry that your mom has been diagnosed... I will pray for her.. I will pray that God will

keep her pain-free, and that if she has to go, that He takes her softly and gently. We are dealing with a similar situation, an inoperable malignant brain tumor -- my wonderful, always positive, always smiling sister-in-law.. I know what you are going through

[Puzzledtraveller]

108. Thank you

Your prayers are very welcome and I pray for peace in your family too.

[Puzzledtraveller]

97. Thank you all so much.

I really value the well wishes, thoughts, prayers and advice. I read every one of them. I woke today hoping yesterday didn't happen. This really helped.

[DFW]

99. Wishing you and her as easy a time as fate can possibly provide

Both my parents and ALL their siblings had cancer. So with me, it's probably not a question of "if," but "when."

I have great sympathy and solidarity with everyone who has to go through this, or has a family member or friend who does.

[joeybee12]

100. Sorry to hear this, but hopefully they can get it all

and it doesn't spread.

[Eleanors38]

101. I'm very sorry. Stay strong. My Mom is 96 and now is using a walker: 2 fall, 2 fractures.

[penndragon69]

103. I had stomach cancer at 46...

luckily, they caught it early and i only had to endure 6 rounds of CHEMO.
However, later recurring incidents of gastric bleeding led to several more
surgeries. I got lucky and the surgeons were able to repair my stomach
so that no gastric bypass was needed.

It was rough as hell for me and my heart goes out for your mother and
what she must now go through. Keep your faith and she can pull through
this difficult time !

[Puzzledtraveller]

104. Thank you for sharing that.

I don't know what we will be doing and I know every ones experience is different but it helps to hear others stories.

[rhett o rick]

105. My best to you and your family. nm

[Dont call me Shirley]

106. Much healing energy sending her way....

[ohheckyeah]

107. My thoughts and prayers

are with your mother, you and your family.

Spend as much time with her as you can - it will help both of you.

[kairos12]

109. Positive and healing thoughts to you and family.

[sarisataka]

110. Best wishes

To you and yours.

[ancianita]

111. VERY sorry. Please hug each other a lot and know that we give you collective hugs, as well.

Remember the best things, talk about them, cry together and hug even more.

Hoping you have some comforts in this hard time.

[Jack Rabbit]

112. ()

[Puzzledtraveller]

114. I really appreciate this.

My sister who is closely monitoring our mothers condition had heard of this organization and recommended I take a look. Thank You very much.

[DFW]

115. Been there myself

Best wishes to you (and for a better outcome).