If one is going to leave a discussion forum, why post a long goodbye, or even a short one?

[HuckleB]

Heck, I think I've done it myself a few times at DU, when I was drunk, but I still don't know why I did it!

[CJCRANE]

1. Hello.

I thought I'd try the opposite tack.

[HuckleB]

10. Nicely done!

[question everything]

2. How else would you express self pity and self justification? (nt)

[HuckleB]

11. Good point.

And I think I resemble that remark, at least when drinking.

Hmm.

[sabrina 1]

14. Or maybe just to let your friends know that you are not sick. That they don't have to worry as

people often do when someone just disappears.

Not everything is done for nefarious reasons. One the bad aspects of the internet is that people seem to become very cynical after a while.

I assume that unless there is a reason to think someone is just looking for attention, we assume they simply want to let their friends, especially longtime members, that they are okay, that they are just moving on.

[LiberalElite]

53. Thank you nt

[KatyMan]

55. If you're "friends" you should be in

Enough contact that it shouldn't be necessary to draw attention to you leaving. Or you should at least have the courtesy to IM anyone interested.

[sabrina 1]

68. When you are as popolar and well respected a poster as the DUer who has decided to move on

today, no, it isn't possible to be in personal tough with the hundreds of DUers who have followed your work over the years.

[HuckleB]

73. Now I feel silly.

Which DUer "moved on today?" As you note? Sorry, I may have missed a thing or two.

[Sheepshank]

103. Did you see those tweets on a thread honoring her?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=7367805
Wow...well respected? By whom?

And her nasty insulting rude comments on her own fwcr thread was far from the noble "I just want to let you all know I'm ok" you are implying. http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027366316

That op and even more so their own responses on their own thread was nasty.

At least they found a friend in you, I suppose. Although I wonder, were you aware if those tweets she had been sending. Many posted down thread on the first link I provided.

Are on board with those?

[yuiyoshida]

107. AsahinaKimi left without a good bye

she told me she was fed up, I mentioned this in the Asian group, but otherwise it was no big production, which is the way she wanted it.

[ChazII]

64. That is why

I like when DUers do issue a good-bye statement. There are some that I do worry about.

[question everything]

110. Then say that you are taking a break for a while

Most posts - the most recent, thankfully was finally locked - are just full of hatred of DU, of DUers, of the administration.

But, of course, you don't need me to point the difference.

[HuckleB]

111. Indeed. -eom-

[redwitch]

3. I understand saying goodbye.

DU has become important to me over the 12 years I have been here. If I ever decide to leave I will say goodbye.

[HuckleB]

12. Some well thought out goodbyes, have been worthy, indeed.

I don't know if the majority qualify, however. Certainly, any goodbye I offered was nonsense.

[EV_Ares]

101. Personally, who cares. They may have a good reason for doing it of which they have a right or as I

do from time to time & don't spend much time here as well, just leave. Like now, just coming back to watch the fun between the Bernie supporters & Hillary supporters. DU is the same old thing, fighting among themselves, lots of good drama until it gets old. I love the posts that say they are going to be terminated & kicked out of DU.

However, if someone wants to say goodbye, that is OK, if not that is OK too.

[randys1]

4. Why not. Get in some last insults....

[HuckleB]

15. Well, you know. I'm trying to avoid insults in my sober old age.

I may not always be particularly at this aversion, but I'm trying.

[cwydro]

46. Ha!

Well played there.

[rjsquirrel]

72. That's exaxtly

what the past bring obliquely referred to does.

"I'M LEAVING, love you ...... And FUCK you people I don't like."


A highly respected poster who has to swear as she leaves.

Lol.

[Number23]

86. And FUCK YOU to the xy who did yz to me!!1 I'm LEAVING!!!!11oneone11

It's so moronic and embarrassing.

[BlueJazz]

5. Probably just to let people know how they feel. I took a vacation from DU for 7 months.

It did me a lot of good. I realized I was the one that was at fault for my anger...not anybody else.

[HuckleB]

16. I've taken many vacations, some involuntary.

I think I'd be cool with "hey, I'm going on vacation! see you when I get back!" posts!

[kwassa]

6. To get people to beg you to stay.

and tell you how wonderful you are.

out of a sense of inflated self-importance.

[sabrina 1]

17. Or maybe to simply let people know you are okay, not to worry. How cynical to assume

it's for any other reason. It's always been a tradition on forums like this for people to let others, who often worry when someone is missing, that something is wrong.

I prefer to assume the best of people whenever possible.

[sheshe2]

56. I prefer to assume the best of people whenever possible.

Ok~

[Tarheel_Dem]

25. ^^^^ THIS ^^^^

[Baclava]

7. I leave all the time and nobody notices

[HuckleB]

18. Oh, I think they do.

Especially with THAT name! We would miss you!

[OKNancy]

8. Some people like to feel important

when people say "don't leave" it makes them feel wanted. It is also attention seeking...but so are many posts on DU. LOL

[sabrina 1]

19. How sad, to always assume the worst of people. I take it they don't want people to worry so

let them know they are okay, just moving on.

Especially longtime members who are well known and ARE missed when they suddenly disappear.

[HuckleB]

22. Hmm. I don't know how one would explain a middle ground between these two posts.

But I think the middle ground there is where I'm at...

Hmm.

[Sheepshank]

105. It's not hard to think poorly of some fwcr posters

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=7367805

That op and even more so their own responses on their own thread was nasty. At least they found a friend in you, I suppose. Although I wonder, were you aware if those tweets she had been sending. Many posted down thread on this post http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027367805

Are on board with those?

[ScreamingMeemie]

42. I don't think we get to reach into the minds and thoughts of others and state why they do

what they do. EVERY post on DU seeks attention, or it wouldn't be posted. What would be the point? Come on now. Have a cup of tea, and enjoy your weekend.

[GusBob]

9. The truth is no one would notice unless you said so

[Renew Deal]

13. Attention

And the repeat offenders are starving for attention.

[HuckleB]

20. Or drunk.

And I guess I crave attention when I'm drunk. Hmm.

[Renew Deal]

23. lol

[linuxman]

21. Drama.

[Iggo]

24. Shh!!!

Those are some of the best threads.

[HuckleB]

29. You do speak truth.

[Trajan]

26. Humans are emotional

Leave some room for that

[HuckleB]

28. Emotions suck!

Oh, wait. Yeah, I like them, too. They do serve a purpose.

[UglyGreed]

27. I think all of

you should leave so I can be alone with my thoughts

[HuckleB]

34. Hmm. How about some bourbon with those thoughts?

[UglyGreed]

38. Thanks but I never tried bourbon

and I'm not much of drinker at all. I'll just spread out enjoy my own company, it's best for us all if you catch my drift

[HuckleB]

43. Got it.

I'll enjoy your bourbon.

[UglyGreed]

51. LOL

just take it easy please since I'll be left alone to clean up the place...

[GP6971]

61. Makers Mark? n/t

[HuckleB]

62. Sounds good to me!

[jberryhill]

30. Why suicide notes?

I don't understand them either.

[HuckleB]

32. Uh, uh.

What?

[jberryhill]

47. "Goodbye, cruel world"

We call them GBCW's after the classic line from suicide notes.

I never understood the point of suicide notes either. After you are dead, it's not as if you are going to give a shit what anyone thinks.

[ScreamingMeemie]

48. I would have given anything for a note from my husband.

Instead, I am left dying a thousands deaths alongside him. It doesn't ease the hurt, but there are times when it is completely and wholly out of left field. That's why.

[HuckleB]

59. I am sorry for your grief.

I lost a brother to suicide when we were both in our 20s, and there was no note, either. Long story, of course. Still, it's a long road, as you clearly know, for the survivors.

Take care.

[Evergreen Emerald]

106. I am so sorry

[HuckleB]

58. I suspect some of them are trying to convince themselves to the act, or from the act.

We're now learning that the act is very often quite impulsive, so the suicide note is interesting in light of that.

[frogmarch]

31. Sometimes when people

get hurt or disgusted by something or someone here, they need to vent. That's all. I don't think everyone who posts a goodbye is trying to get other posters to ask them to stay. They just feel bad.

[HuckleB]

33. No doubt about it.

I never intended to stay when I did it. That's for sure.

And yet...

[ScreamingMeemie]

35. Because they want to.

It's that simple. Some people like to "leave a mark" if only for a moment. Others not so much.

I left one once because I did leave for a very long time after MrG died. I wasn't myself, and I was sick of the trainwreck aspect of my life... and at that point I had more than a few acquaintances here (it's not like it is now) so I left and returned with a new name. Now? I take off all the time, but I'm not super attached to the majority of people anymore. I've "grown up," and DU doesn't mean to me what it once did. I hope that makes sense.

[HuckleB]

69. You're post makes much sense. Still, this song also hit my head when I read your tag line.

[ScreamingMeemie]

93. Ha! I haven't heard that song in forever.

[Nye Bevan]

36. I wouldn't do that if I left, because the thread would set a new record

for the total number of occurrences of the words "door", "ass", and "hit".

[cwydro]

50. Lol!

I think you're made of tougher stuff anyway.

[Fumesucker]

37. If you live in a very red community you may have no other political contact that's not hostile

Of course the hostility from conservatives has now become part and parcel of DU. I actually found Discussionist to be more respectful overall than DU.

For quite a few of us DU was a real lifeline to political sanity at one time, it would be difficult to adequately describe how isolated I felt back when I first found DU through Bartcop (who is now dead and gone).

[haikugal]

60. Good observation, as usual. Thanks Fumesucker.

[HuckleB]

83. I don't see that.

The reality is the 40 percent of the most red or blue communities is still the opposite, although online nonsense is not the same.

[Fumesucker]

97. Eh, I've never knowingly met another atheist either

I'm sure I've met other atheists, we just don't know each other when we do because it's something that isn't spoken of in the more religious and conservative parts of the country.

Likewise I'm sure there are other liberals around but there's no way to tell who they are when liberals don't bring up their political inclinations in public.

When every political or religious discussion turns into a fight you learn to shut up about it unless you want to spend all your time fighting with irrational people.

Remember, at the time I found DU, Dubya had a 90% approval rating generally and where I live it was higher than that. The chances of running into someone that didn't like him were about one in twenty or thirty, everyone else was a potential political fight.

[SickOfTheOnePct]

39. YAGE

Yet Another Grand Exit

[saturnsring]

40. same with ignore - why do people feel it neccessary to tell you theyre putting you on ignore

[HuckleB]

63. That is weird, indeed.

And yet I have done it, myself. I still say it's weird, however.

[Action_Patrol]

74. The best is 'welcome to my ignore list'

As if anyone could possibly care.

So very dramatic.

[kwassa]

78. Welcome to MY ignore list.

as soon as I start one.

[Action_Patrol]

95. WhooHoo! Thank you.

[npk]

90. The best part is when they tell you they are ignoring you, but then occasionally come off ignore...

just to yell at you.

[sibelian]

99. So that they're saved the effort of posting to me without hope of response.

If they KNOW they won't bother and waste their time.

ALSO, I want them to actually know that I'm sufficiently pissed off with them that I don't think they're worth talking to any more. It's very unlikely that they'll give a fuck, sure but if there's a general consensus that informing people that they are being ignored, those who end up getting ignored all the time MIGHT think "hm, maybe this is my fault" IF they're being told.

[bigwillq]

41. They're free to do so. End of story.

If that's what they want to do, cool. But it still makes me chuckle and I will crack a joke about it.
Bye, Felicia.

[840high]

45. When a favorite poster is leaving - I want to know.

[cwydro]

49. The ones who do it almost once a month are the ones that I find tiresome.

But each to his own.

[ScreamingMeemie]

52. That is really the only time it grinds on me too.

And then I hide the freaking thread and pretend like nothing happened when he/she returns.

[cwydro]

65. Yes, I have to admit sometimes I do remark on the GBCW post,

but I usually restrain myself when I see them again within the week lol.

I actually think a lot of people on DU may be very lonely and/or alone. So I try to put myself in their moccasins and move on.

Some of the angriest posters here - I think are maybe in a bad place elsewhere. I mean, we all have RL issues to deal with.

At any rate, that's the excuse I come up with for some of the posters whose never-ending negativity starts to become annoying.

[Rose Siding]

54. They lose their cool

Boy, boy, crazy boy,
Get cool, boy!
Got a rocket in your pocket,
Keep coolly cool, boy!
Don't get hot,
'Cause man, you got
Some high times ahead.
Take it slow and Daddy-O,
You can live it up and die in bed!

Boy, boy, crazy boy!
Stay loose, boy!
Breeze it, buzz it, easy does it.
Turn off the juice, boy!
Go man, go,
But not like a yo-yo schoolboy.
Just play it cool, boy,
Real cool!

[DFW]

57. Sometimes it's not an intended permanent departure

I need a cumbersome operation soon, and might be away for more than a normal hiatus. I'll probably post something when the time comes. That way, the people who care will know, and the ones who have me on ignore (there must be several by now), plus the one self-righteous jerkoff crusader who banned me from a group for an inadvertent post, will have no cause to rejoice

[HuckleB]

66. Ouch, and good luck!

Take care!

[DFW]

108. It won't be pretty, but I knew it was coming some day

The surgeon told me last time (1999) it was a degenerative process, and that I'd need it again "some day," but he couldn't possible predict when. I'd know it. Well, I'm limping and am in constant pain since about 2 weeks, so I know it. At least I know why. It's complicated though, as I am on blood thinners for my heart, and know for a fact (as in from 4 years ago) that I will get another heart attack if I go off the blood thinners, which will then cause complications if I need an operation.

Oh, well. Either they figure something out, or I become a cripple, or I don't wake up. One way or the other, something will happen.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

67. So they can get hilariously get locked out of their own GBCW pity thread, of course. nt

[HuckleB]

75. This must be a grand thread. Alas, I missed it.

[merrily]

70. Why do so many make such an issue of this. People are entitled to take leave however they wish, or

just vanish. It's really up to them. And if they come back, so what? Welcome back.

[HuckleB]

71. Do you like pineapple on pizza?

[merrily]

85. My point is, why do care if I have pineapples on my pizza or not?

In old films, when an actor had to die, the director would basically let him or her die any way he or she wanted. I think the same should prevail when taking leave of DU.

BTW, I won't be kicking this thread again.

[geomon666]

76. Personally I wouldn't say goodbye.

Doesn't really make sense to in my position. I don't have the attachments that some people do here. I've never made friends here. I'm certainly not close with anyone from this site. I don't think I've even met anyone from here.

But for those that do have all of that, sure I get it.

[bigwillq]

77. Hi.

[geomon666]

79. Hello

[bigwillq]

80. I've only met 1 person IRL

But I interact with many on Facebook that I consider friends. But I still wouldn't make a goodbye posts. I would tell those I want to know, but I wouldn't feel the need to make it public. Folks can do as they wish, I just get a chuckle out of the goodbye threads.

Hope you are having a nice night.

[HuckleB]

84. The first couple of years, it might have been different, indeed.

I don't have a true connection to the site any more, however.

[bigwillq]

87. I still enjoy DU for information and reading articles

But some need to lighten up and remember it is just a message board. We need to not take it so seriously. Bye, Felicia.

[HuckleB]

89. True enough. Still, it used to be more of a community, and that's not bad.

[bigwillq]

91. No, that's not a bad thing.

But things change.

[HuckleB]

92. Good point.

&feature=youtu.be

[JustAnotherGen]

81. Comic relief?

[HuckleB]

82. Far too true, much of the time.

[Number23]

88. Sid and a few others (Creekdog maybe??) are great at keeping track of the GBCW posts

And will post them often in the latest GBCW to much embarrassment and wailing from the author of the latest GBCW and their defenders.

[ladjf]

94. Why not post a "goodbye" letter? nt

[Rex]

96. It must be this thing called positive meta I just heard about, discovered in a DU lab.

GD attracts it while at the same time repelling disruptive meta at near the speed of light.

[HuckleB]

100. Nice. Great term.

[Rex]

109. Thank you sir!

[sibelian]

98. MY leaving thread was LOVELY. Everybody was so nice to me!

Mind you, I was clear about the reasons and it wasn't "I hate you all" it was "I have to focus on other things". I put nice pictures in it too, which I think helped.

Anyway, it's difficult not to put hours of effort into something involving other people of any kind, and not feel attached to it and them, of course. I think it's perfectly normal. I would never insult someone for expressing discontent with DU to the extent that they felt they had to leave. And really, HuckleB, is it so unnatural to want to know that people had some interest in what you did? It's very easy to be snotty about GBCW. I always think it's a shame.

Well. Unless it was obviously just dumb, self-absorbed trolling, obviously. But I've seen far fewer genuinely ugly GBCW posts as the years go by. It's a lot less like that now.

[Sunlei]

102. people even do the goodbye posts on game messageboards. It's because they have a sense of community

[Butterbean]

112. I left a message board I was very entrenched in without posting a word.

What followed was a deluge of emails and phone calls asking where I was and if I was okay. It was.........bizarre. So while part of me kinda really cringes at GBKW posts, part of me thinks they do serve a purpose. People know where you went and won't go a-hunting.