Obama's barrage of complete sentences seen as brutal attack on Trump.

[JHan]

CHICAGO (The Borowitz Report)—In an appearance at the University of Chicago on Monday, former President Barack Obama unloaded a relentless barrage of complete sentences in what was widely seen as a brutal attack on his successor, Donald Trump.

Appearing at his first public event since leaving office, Obama fired off a punishing fusillade( ) of grammatically correct sentences, the likes of which the American people have not heard from the White House since he departed.

“He totally restricted his speech to complete sentences,” Tracy Klugian, a student at the event, said. “It was the most vicious takedown of Trump I’d ever seen.”

“About five or six sentences in, I noticed that all of his sentences had both nouns and verbs in them,” Carol Foyler, another student, said. “I couldn’t believe he was going after Trump like that.”

Obama’s blistering deployment of complete sentences clearly got under the skin of their intended target, who, moments after the event, responded with an angry tweet: “Obama bad (or sick) guy. Failing. Sad!”

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/obamas-barrage-of-complete-sentences-seen-as-brutal-attack-on-trump

[Eliot Rosewater]

1. I know, right! This has always bugged the shit out of me, why does Barack

insist on being not dumb and speaking in intelligent and complete sentences?

Doesnt he fucking realize WE DON'T DO THAT ANYMORE?

[JHan]

2. speaking properly and caring about what you say and how it is interpreted is elitist.

[underpants]

3. Post good

[JHan]

10. I love it lol.

[sheshe2]

4. Bwahahahahahahahaha!

Priceless, JHan.

Borowitz!

[JHan]

9. I died, we need the laughter too..

Nothing satisfies like good mocking

[sheshe2]

11. Dayum straight!

If there is one mocker that can get under Cheeto's skin the quickest, it would be Obama!



Please proceed President O!

[JHan]

13. lol for good measure:

[2Legit]

5. Guffaw!

I know, right? God, I miss him so much.

[JHan]

8. me too , glad he's returned to public life :)

[Amimnoch]

6. Not to mention the judicious use of adjectives, and lack of interjections.

The nerve!

[JHan]

7. how dare he!

[Lucky Luciano]

12. The subject line seemed like Borowitz! I was right and he rocks! LOL. nt

[smirkymonkey]

14. I guessed it too!

I'm getting good at it! Hysterical!

[Stonepounder]

15. And I am willing to bet that Obama didn't use any of the following:

"great"
"many people have told me"
"the worst deal"
"terrible"
"Trump"

[JHan]

23. lol and "i have the best words"

[irisblue]

16. Would someone post the Obama Bat Signal?

We need it now, more then ever.

[jesskirablue42]

34. fuck batman

He's with trump. Have you heard? he let batgirl get raped and is still buddies with joker afterwards.

[irisblue]

36. I guess you have not seen the OBAMA (bat) signal meme

The Obama logo INSTEAD of the batman logo.
So what do you like on your pizza?

[oldcynic]

17. Prez Gop gonna hate this. n/t

[JDC]

18. So good.

[Yonnie3]

19. Satire or fact?

We are now living in a world where it is becoming difficult to determine what is satire and what is real.

Poe's Law now seems to apply everywhere!

Every day I read about the present administration's statements and actions and then need to check carefully to see if what I'm reading is tongue in cheek.

I've worn out the phrase "you just can't make up shit like this."

[Amaryllis]

26. Me too. Have to check sources to know if it's satire, more and more often. Someone posted

some real stuff recently and I thought it was satire till I checked the source.

[malaise]

20. K & R

Great post Borowitz or no Borowitz - it's true

[NastyRiffraff]

21. Borowitz comes closer and closer to objective fact.

As people have said many times, it's hard to tell satire from fact since Dump infested the WH.

Listening to Obama today, I cried. I couldn't help it.

[JHan]

22. the difference is so stark.

sigh.

I'm just glad he's returned to public life. He also spoke about gerrymandering and touched on voter suppression.

[erronis]

28. Since $$$$$s infested elections and the 'uglicans stuck their snouts into the trough

big time.

It's like trumpf is the infested boil on the rump of the pig (sorry porcines).

We're all afraid to lance it because of the puss explosion.

What are the poor(rich) repuglicans to do? They know they're addicted to money and power and pustulence. But if they admit their sins they'll still be wrestling with other pigs in the mud. Keep digging your holes, a----s.

[catbyte]

24. Ouch, lol!

[Cha]

25. asshole takes it so

personally. lol

Mahalo for this, JH!

[JHan]

33. lol

[LAS14]

27. LOL!! K&R

[Heartstrings]

29. How refreshing President Obama had

complete and coherent sentences.....I miss that man so much!

[ailsagirl]

30. Just have to say it (echoing your sentiment, Heartstrings)

God, I miss that man sooo much!!!!!!!

[Wounded Bear]

31. Please proceed...

[JHan]

32. one of the greatest memes ever

[Nitram]

35. How dare Obama expose our president for the rude ignoramus he is!

[rpannier]

37. No Biglys?

No I'll tell yas?
No Yuuuuuuges?

[JHan]

40. Lol

[dchill]

38. That whole subject / predicate thing...

It's just so insidious!

[JHan]

41. harming trump's presidency with predicates n shit

[Sunlei]

39. I hope this years White House Correspondents dinner has Obama & Clinton as surprise speakers :P

just to piss off trump a bit more about more comedy about the Republicans UNFITman coming soon!

[JHan]

42. That would be so epic but won't happen

We play too nice