Sen. Eddie Lucio Files Bill Requiring Texas Men To Take Three-Hour Masturbation Course Before Sex
Senator Eddie Lucio (D) announced today that he's filing a bill that will require all male Texans to complete a required 3-hour webinar on masturbation techniques before every instance of having consensual intercourse in Texas.
The bill -- which is only directed at men, causing some activists to question why no webinar is required for women, should any of them ever be involved in the act of sexual intercourse -- is viewed as the latest effort to create unnecessary barriers between men and their reproductive decisions.
Men's rights advocates argued that men are already well aware of the option of masturbation before they choose to seek a partner, and that this paternalistic legislation is just intended for Lucio to demonstrate that he knows best what men should do with their bodies.
Lucio explained the rationale for his bill in an interview:
"We're not trying to hurt the potential father, we're trying to help the unejaculated be ejaculated," he told the Austin American-Statesman newspaper.
But unplanned ejaculation advocates do not believe the classes would help anyone.
"What I don't like about it is it seems punitive," said Ron Johnson, executive director of the Austin-based nonprofit Ejaculation Alternatives Inc. "It's another hoop for men to jump through when they face an unplanned sexual encounter."
"More" online at http://www.burntorangereport.com/diary/13892/sen-eddie-lucio-files-bill-requiring-texas-men-to-take-threehour-masturbation-course-before-sex .
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Oops, I didn't read below the jump--it is satire.[/font]
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Has to be.
