Things In Politico That Make me Want To Guzzle Antifreeze, 2016 Republican Field Edition

[babylonsister]

Things In Politico That Make me Want To Guzzle Antifreeze, 2016 Republican Field Edition
By Charles P. Pierce
at 11:53AM




Please hit me with a mallet now.

Jindal, the Rhodes scholar and new chairman of the Republican Governors Association, is making a very public case for a more intellectual approach to conservatism, accusing the GOP of being, in his words, "the stupid party."

That's quite enough of that, thank you.

Rather than read this whole thing and lose all hope for representative democracy, let's just see if we can make a game of it. Name all the people pictured and write something about each of them that we all know.

Row One:

1) Kelly Ayotte: Prominent Romney surrogate, now bears mark of Cain forever.

2) Michelle Bachmann: Won re-election by an eyelash. Voices in head provided margin of victory.

3) Jeb Bush: Worst political last name problem since that lovely Mr. Hilter ran in the by-election.

4) Chris Christie: Failed to let state drown rather than do business with Kenyan anti-christ. Megachurches all over South praying that he detonates.

5) Nikki Haley: South Carolina: Cradle Of Presidents.

6) "Bobby" Jindal: It is easier to ride your dinosaur if the earth is flat. Jesus taught us that.

Row Two:

7) Susana Martinez: Will have to show ID to give acceptance speech.

8) Bob McDonnell: Transvaginal.

9) Rand Paul: Aqua Buddha.

10) Mike Pence: Milk carton.

11) Rick Perry: No. Stop. Seriously, you're kidding me.

more...

[niyad]

1. having looked at his bio, I will hereinafter refer to jindal by his given name, piyush (and don't

ask me to tell you what my mind saw when I was skimming the article)

I was going to wonder how an actual rhodes scholar could be so stupid, but there have been a couple of posts on the subject of education vs stupidity already today, and it makes my head hurt)

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

7. It is a little weird that Piyush goes by "Bobby"

due to a childhood crush he had on a Brady Bunch cast member, or so the story he gives goes.

and I love that he's seeking an 'intellectual" form of conservatism.

This, from a guy who carried out an amateur exorcism in college.

[LukeFL]

19. Is that the story he says? The Brady bunch?

[HopeHoops]

2. Thanks. I was THAT close to eating something but now I just want to puke.

[babylonsister]

4. Hahaha! Oh, come on! What a line-up! Think about it! nt

[HopeHoops]

12. GOP 2016 coming right up.

[beac]

3. Hope the RNC has budgeted for a clown BUS... even the biggest car won't hold all that crazy. n/t

[babylonsister]

5. Exactly. :) nt

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

9. The 2016 primaries could be even more entertaining than 2012

at least in 2012 they sort of had a frontrunner in Romney, but 2016 looks like a free-for-all, which should bring out a new level of crazy in all of them.

and am I the only one who suspects Willard might be plotting another run in four years?

[Silent3]

6. Link to full article

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1112/84110.html?hp=l2

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

8. Seeing a lot of pieces from the beltway hacks about GOP candidates for 2016

but very few articles on possible Dems.

Wonder why?

[babylonsister]

10. Because we have the luxury of

having a Dem as President, and don't have to be too worried at the moment, I think. Plus, we need to give this man room to do his thing. My opinion anyway... Don't worry, there will be tons of speculation in plenty of time.

[Cosmocat]

13. Because it is the liberal press

and the liberal press, naturally, swoons over the next republican STAR and its DEEP BENCH, while never referring to any D as a STAR and never using the term DEEP BENCH for the democrats.

[Thrill]

11. I bet Christie has that surgery that Rex Ryan had

and looks nothing like he does now. And easily wins the nomination

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

14. Now that'd the biggest collection of assholes I've seen

in a long time.

[babylonsister]

15. No shit! Hahaha! nt

[SunSeeker]

16. Oh please, "Bobby." If you had any guts you'd use your real name like Barack does.

And "intellectual conservatism" is an oxymoron. The rest of your compatriots? They're just morons, although some do appear to also have "oxy."

[NewJeffCT]

20. He was the guy that whined about volcano monitoring

only days before a major eruption took place in Alaska.

[Proud Liberal Dem]

17. Mike Pence?

*ugh* He just got elected Governor of my state and we'll have to deal with him for at least the next 4 years. Pass the antifreeze!!!

[CBHagman]

18. I'm going to go out on a limb here...

...and say that Michele Bachmann and Rick Santorum will never be elected president or vice president. Not going to happen.

[NewJeffCT]

21. Bush, Rubio and Christie are all possible threats

in 2016.

If the country could "elect" Bush Jr in 2000 only 8 years after Bush Sr, I don't think Jeb in 2016 is far-fetched at all.