Hey, Kellyanne! Remember when? [View all]

[NanceGreggs]

Remember when Donnie-J announced at a rally in Jacksonville, Florida, the “breaking news” about the FBI’s investigation of the Clinton Foundation, stating that “an avalanche of information is coming in” and that “the FBI agents say their investigation is likely to yield an indictment” – an “announcement” that was based on a FOX-News report by Bret Baier, which was later retracted and called an “inartful” representation of the situation?

Remember when you later appeared with Brian Williams and told him that Trump’s proclamation that Hillary was facing a “likely indictment” by the FBI was based on “inaccurate reporting” – but it didn’t matter because factual or not, “the damage is done to Hillary Clinton”?

Remember when Williams asked you to concede that “indictment” is a specific term of law, and that it was a huge misrepresentation to use the expression ‘likely indictment’ when all the legitimate reporting on the matter was to the contrary?

Remember when your response was “Well, the damage is done to Hillary Clinton, and no matter how it’s being termed, the voters are hearing it for what it is, a culture of corruption.”

Guess what, Sweetums? The Donnie-J Pissgate story is all over the media now, along with allegations of ties between your boss and Russian operatives before AND during the campaign. And it’s not coming from some FOX-News bobblehead, but from reliable intel sources.

You see, honey, nothing gets the public all a-Twitter like a juicy scandal involving perverse sex acts, Russian spies, and urinating hookers. In fact, if someone could throw-in some 80-mph troika chases for the action sequences, we’d be looking at a blockbuster movie.

People who, out of sheer boredom, tuned-out stories about alleged goings-on in the Clinton Foundation have suddenly tuned-in. The CF stories involved money, and convoluted connect-the-dots exercises (Math? Spreadsheets? Pie-charts? UGH!), which quickly led to a “meh, wake me when it gets interesting” attitude.

But now all ears are perked-up and listening intently to tales of Russian lovelies urinating-on-command to satisfy the sexual cravings of a soon-to-inaugurated presidential candidate - tales that don't involve math, except for those curious about exactly how many paid-to-perform sex workers were involved, and precisely how many pints-o'-piss it takes to get Donnie-J off.

What goes around “comes” around (pun very much intended). I look forward to your inevitable spin, your indignant declarations that this is all “fake news” and shouldn’t be given any credence whatsoever.

But the truth is – as you yourself stated – factual or not, “the damage is done”. And there seems to be a lot more fact involved here than not.

So get to spinnin’ that straw into gold, lady fair. (And by the way, it's Trumpelthinskin – just so you know the name to invoke in order to break free of the evil spell.)