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HipChick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:06 AM
Original message
I can't find the way to a man's heart..

because I don't cook..:rofl: it's not that I can't,but just have no real interest..guys always seem shocked when I say that...:shrug: guy wanted to know when I was going to invite him home for a good cooked meal..I said, as soon as you stop by the grocery store,and bring your own pots and pans..:eyes: he thought I was joking..:evilgrin:

I can rustle up something so I don't starve...but I can just live off salads if need be..

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Richardo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
1. There are several alternate routes available.
Edited on Mon Apr-12-10 11:10 AM by Richardo
:D
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zanana1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:16 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. Mac n' cheese will do....
If you use Richardo's alernate routes. In fact, let the man find his way to YOUR heart if you use one of those routes.
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Q3JR4 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 04:11 PM
Response to Reply #1
43. Yep. A very sharp knife would do in a pinch.
Oh you meant the way to his heart while keeping him alive? Bit harder there.

Q3JR4.
Especially if you can't cook. :shrug:
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Lucian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:20 AM
Response to Original message
3. Food isn't everything to a man.
:)
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trof Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 06:52 PM
Response to Reply #3
45. 'Man does not live by bread alone.' Scotch plays an important part.
She could try that.
;-)
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Bucky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:35 AM
Response to Original message
4. Don't be fooled by guys telling you there's a short cut. The trip is quicker, but...
it doesn't wind up in his heart.
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HipChick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:40 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. LOL!

:rofl:
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Swede Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 11:56 AM
Response to Original message
6. Shortest way is through his rib cage.
:shrug:
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baldguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:48 PM
Response to Reply #6
24. .
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gmoney Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 12:07 PM
Response to Original message
7. you don't have to cook it... carryout works fine, too.
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MilesColtrane Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 12:58 PM
Response to Original message
8. Tell lover boy to cook YOU a meal instead of trying to invite himself to your place.
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HipChick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. He's too busy trying to schedule the U-Haul truck...

boy does he have a surprise coming...I don't even like him staying over too much.
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Mopar151 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:26 PM
Response to Reply #12
21. Is he inviting himself for the bum's rush?
Some ladies don't take well to smothering....My wife is an ace cook, but I do a lot of the day-to-day "leftover surprise" things.
Tonight is "dirty rice", which becomes "Macho Nachos" or burrito stuffing.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 01:02 PM
Response to Original message
9. i dont know. i had a stove i had never turned on, a freezer of frozen dinners. hubby cooked good
Edited on Mon Apr-12-10 01:02 PM by seabeyond
meals for me.... and, i fell in love.
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Deep13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 01:19 PM
Response to Original message
10. Thrust your knife just under the sternum and upward.
You should be aware that this is not necessarily a silent method.

:evilgrin:
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unpossibles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 02:29 PM
Response to Original message
11. I was going to suggest another route
but it would get the thread locked in a nanosecond.

FWIW, I love to cook, and am not expecting anyone else to cook, as long as they accept that it can be a lot of work. My ex often did not really appreciate how much work cooking/cleaning can be; even if I do like doing it, it still takes a couple of hours a day.
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 03:06 PM
Response to Original message
13. sounds like a 1950s attitude
to me. Does he also expect both of you to be virgins on your wedding day?

While it would be nice for either party to offer a home-cooked meal, I don't think either person in a relationship should expect something like that.
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Bennyboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 03:20 PM
Response to Original message
14. How bout I cook you a meal?
I'm a GREAT COOK.
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tango-tee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 03:31 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Bennyboy, from a woman's point of view, there are few things sexier than men who can cook.
Edited on Mon Apr-12-10 03:32 PM by tango-tee
And I'm talking about guys who can cook *real* food, not those who drape carrot shavings on foamy parsley pureée, while blabbing on about their copper pots.

Lucky me - I'm married to one of those really good cooks. And just as soon as he finishes washing the dishes... watch out! :nuke:
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Bennyboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 03:49 PM
Response to Reply #15
17. You'd think now wouldn't ya?
But some ladies are really put off by a man that cooks. Competition. I have never met a woman that could cook as well as I can, yet I have met many that refuse to relinquish that function...

I'm a big taco guy. Can do some bad ass tacos about 20 different ways. Can grill a steak and make it perfect. Love to make candies too. Not big into foo foo, but regular food...
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Roon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:23 PM
Response to Reply #17
20. Tell me more!!
I'm just messing with you bud, I'm sorry. :-)
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tango-tee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:54 PM
Response to Reply #17
25. It's really strange.
It seems men either can't cook at all, or they're great. They will absolutely knock you off your feet with delight, or else make you want to gargle with Clorox.

Now... I'm a fajita girl. Give me some flank steak, a bit of lime juice and herbs, some mesquite wood, good tortillas, and we're cookin'!



:toast:
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Roon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:23 PM
Response to Reply #25
30. Ok..i am putting this thread on ignore
I never get to eat that good..now I am VERY hungry! :-)
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Roon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:21 PM
Response to Reply #14
19. Ooooh, Benny!! What are you doing tomorrow?
:-)
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tango-tee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:56 PM
Response to Reply #19
26. Oooh.....
:evilgrin:
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:22 PM
Response to Reply #19
29. now wait a minute roon
you just said in another thread....

ah, lol

never mind. wink
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 06:01 PM
Response to Reply #14
35. dup
Edited on Mon Apr-12-10 06:02 PM by Skittles
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tjwash Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 03:42 PM
Response to Original message
16. What a fool...he should have showed up with all the gear and cooked for you.
There is nothing cooler than cooking up a meal and having someone else enjoy it.

One of my faves is about 5 fresh peeled roma tomatoes, sauteed in olive oil, with a couple fine-minced garlic cloves added in. Then chop as much sweet basil as you can handle, and add it last thing right after it forms a sauce. Then pour over a couple of ahi-tuna fillets, and cook in the oven for 15 minutes at 350.

Serve it over it over a bed of wild rice and you are living large.

Now I'm hungry...
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Roon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:19 PM
Response to Original message
18. My ex and I would fight horribly through out the day...
until meal time...He would whip something up and we would eat with our foster daughter and be at peace for a couple of hours.. then we would start fighting again.
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Forkboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:39 PM
Response to Original message
22. With me it's all dead ends anyways.
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tango-tee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:04 PM
Response to Reply #22
27. Dear forkboy,
If this means what I think it means... that doesn't sound good at all!

Whatever may be happening in your life right now to make you say this, here is a big, loving hug for you.
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Forkboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:10 PM
Response to Reply #27
28. Well thank you!
That was a nice thought. I appreciate it! :)
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tango-tee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:35 PM
Response to Reply #28
33. Big smooch coming your way!
Take care, my friend! :hug:
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Forkboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 09:16 PM
Response to Reply #33
39. If it was possible to blush online I would be.
:blush:
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lunatica Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 04:47 PM
Response to Original message
23. I taught my boys how to cook
They're both excellent cooks. It's a joy to eat their food. One became a professional cook for a while.

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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:32 PM
Response to Original message
31. Me neither.
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Forkboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 09:15 PM
Response to Reply #31
38. Maybe if you liked hockey instead of soccer!
;)
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nickinSTL Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:34 PM
Response to Original message
32. seems to me it'd be through
the ribcage

:evilgrin:
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 05:38 PM
Response to Original message
34. Fix him a sandwich
You'll be pleasantly surprised
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 08:16 PM
Response to Reply #34
48. I was thinking bj
but then, what do I know? :7
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struggle4progress Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 07:35 PM
Response to Original message
36. The secret to good cooking is a very hungry audience
Edited on Mon Apr-12-10 07:36 PM by struggle4progress
Plan carefully. Go for a long hike on a miserable cold rainy day. Then it's back to your place.

Oh, no! I completely forgot to go shopping yesterday because Kathy called. Her boyfriend's father's cat coughed up a hairball, and she was sooo distraught! I had to spend hours calming her down

Well, it's time to raid the pantry. What have you got? An apple, a few tablespoons of peanut butter, seven or eight crackers, three big pretzels, the butt end of a bit of schweitzer cheese, half a cucumber, a few bites of ice cream, two cups of milk, a packet of cocoa mix, one beer ...

Two cups of slightly cocoa-flavored milk from the microwave, a quarter of a cucumber with some apple slices spread with peanut butter on plates, a few slices of cheese on some crackers with a pretzel on the side, two or three bites of ice cream each, half a glass of beer each ... you're on your way to a lovely romantic evening
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Kat45 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 08:45 PM
Response to Original message
37. Same here. My boyfriend complained that I've never cooked for him--
and he's a chef! Who also knows that I don't cook. He can't believe that anyone doesn't know how to cook, but I've known a lot of people, many women, who don't cook. And he's never actually sat me down and cooked me a meal either, despite cooking being his thing. (He's occasionally thrown a few things together for us when we were hungry, but he's never actually planned a meal for me.)
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tango-tee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 12:43 AM
Response to Reply #37
41. Anthony Bourdain wrote in one of his books
that his favorite meals in "real life" are things like meatloaf and mashed potatoes, just regular, stick-to-the-ribs food. Mom food.

Maybe that's because a chef is expected to experiment with all sorts of combinations of ingredients, resulting in mind-blowing experiences for the palate, that he just doesn't feel like standing in the kitchen in his off-hours? But I definitely know what you mean - if my boyfriend were a chef, I'd like for him to prepare an out of this world dinner for me, too.
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Robeson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-12-10 09:38 PM
Response to Original message
40. I do all the cooking on our homefront. In fact, I don't like Mrs Robeson in the...
...kitchen when I'm cooking. Surely you could find another wonderful male - like myself - out there! :D
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Mopar151 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 04:07 AM
Response to Original message
42. A broiler or toaster oven
A microwave, paper plates and aluminium foil. (I loathe doing dishes)

A quick stop at the deli or grocery, and you're good to go. I have a number of concoctions I make this way - basically toasted sandwiches with microwave prepared meats. The trick is to toast the cheese on the bread or roll. If using prepared (or leftover) bacon, toast it on the bread too.

And there's good ol' soup, and some supermarkets have hard-boiled eggs. If a big bowl of Minestrone and a chef salad won't do, there's no hope at all. One good saute' pan, and a compatible spatula, and my repretory expands dramatically. You can get frozen chopped onions and peppers now, which is an excellent cheat.
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Honeycombe8 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 06:10 PM
Response to Original message
44. Men like money more than cooking.
I'm divorced many years now. But when I was married, hubby was unhappy that I wasn't cooking the 7 course dinners that his mother used to. I pointed out that I can't, that those take time that I don't have, since I work.

But I told him that I would quit work and do my best to become a domestic wife, if that's what he really wanted. And that included cooking meals from scratch with several courses, every night and every day. (His mother even cooked meals for lunch. No quickie sandwiches for her!) I didn't know if I could really do that, but I'd give it a try to do that, just like I'd do any job.

Of course, that meant he'd have to give up my paycheck.

He chose the paycheck and thereafter seemed satisfied with meals that took 1 hour or less to cook (except for occasional weekends).

Like you, I have no interest in cooking. I think that's because I just don't like the activity, plus I don't have picky tastebuds. I pretty much like the way all foods are cooked, if I eat that food in the first place. And you CANNOT become a good cook if you don't really care what food tastes like!

So take it from me. Men like money more than cooking. What appeals to men about cooking, I think, is the fact that a woman TRY to cook lovingly for him. I mean, their mothers weren't usually great cooks. But that doesn't matter to most men. What mattered was that mom cooked their favorite foods, with love, just for them.

Men also like good looks. Trust me....if you're good looking with a good job, you have no worries. But it would add a spark if you would just show an interest in trying to cook something you know the men like, but you can save the spark for that someone special.
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 08:11 PM
Response to Original message
46. That would require most of us to have hearts to begin with.
:evilgrin:
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HipChick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 08:13 PM
Response to Reply #46
47. See I was being nice and not going there..
:rofl:
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Richard Steele Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 08:21 PM
Response to Original message
49. Have you tried pulling his zipper down? That works too. nm
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old mark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-13-10 09:26 PM
Response to Original message
50. I cook. All I want is for you to shut up during football games. nt
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denbot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Apr-14-10 01:54 AM
Response to Original message
51. If your smile alone doesn't light the way, give him a pass.
I learned early in my long former bachelorhood that cooking gives the illusion of domestication.:evilgrin: I had great relationships where I cooked, and many where I wasn't allowed in the kitchen. If he is like I was, cooking whether at my place or hers was just a way to edge closer to the bedroom.

My cooking past was a sorted affair, I know, but it served me well. This evening I made fried chicken, garlic mashed potatoes, and corn for Alley and the spawn.

Karma is a bitch! :spank:
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