Gay DU'ers, DOBSON and Nicolosi Insults Your Fathers

[liberalpragmatist]

Okay, sorry for clogging DU with ANOTHER Dobson post, but I can no longer update my original and found a new outrage in the SAME newsletter.

I'm sure our Gay and Lesbian friends on DU would be THRILLED to tell their fathers that it's all their fault.

Fresh off Dobson and Dr. Nicolosi's bizarre advice regarding "un-manly" sons (shower with them so they can be impressed by your penis - and there's evidence he's including children ages 5 to 11 in that), Dobson's column and quest against the gays also takes on... their fathers.

First thread on the showering subject is here:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=104&topic_id=4307241&mesg_id=4307241

As for the new outrage:

http://www.family.org/docstudy/newsletters/a0021043.cfm

Based on my work with adult homosexuals, I try to avoid the necessity of a long and sometimes painful therapy by encouraging parents, particularly fathers, to affirm their sons' maleness. Parental education, in this area and all others, can prevent a lifetime of unhappiness and a sense of alienation. When boys begin to relate to their fathers, and begin to understand what is exciting, fun and energizing about their fathers, they will learn to accept their own masculinity. They will find a sense of freedom—of power—by being different from their mothers, outgrowing them as they move into a man's world. If parents encourage their sons in these ways, they will help them develop masculine identities and be well on their way to growing up straight. In 15 years, I have spoken with hundreds of homosexual men. I have never met one who said he had a loving, respectful relationship with his father.

Many of these fathers loved their sons and wanted the best for them, but for whatever reason (perhaps there was a mismatch between the father's and son's temperaments), the boy perceived his father as a negative or inadequate role model. Dad was "not who I am" or "not who I want to be." A boy needs to see his father as confident, self-assured and decisive. He also needs him to be supportive, sensitive and caring. Mom needs to back off a bit. What I mean is, don't smother him. Let him do more things for himself. Don't try to be both Mom and Dad for him. If he has questions, tell him to ask Dad. She should defer to her husband anything that will give him a chance to demonstrate that he is interested in his son—that he isn't rejecting him.