Craigslist: ASSHOLE HUSBAND for sale, or will trade for dog toys

[DS1]

Ouch

http://kansascity.craigslist.org/rnr/777361299.html

HI LADIES I am putting my lying, cheating, scumbag of a husband up for sale. After all the money I gave him to repair our house (which he spent on other women) plus the alimony and child support I'll never get (he gets paid under the table) I should be charging thousands of dollars to recup my loss. However, since his dick is so small and he can't keep it in his pants, I am only asking the incredibly low price of FIVE DOLLARS ($5)!!! In this one-time-only, amazing deal, you get an ugly, sleazy parasite who will insult you daily, ruin your career and destroy your happiness, all the while making you feel like you are at fault for everything from global warming to the price of cigarettes.

Here is some more information about the gem of a man you will receive:

Name: EFRAIN ROJAS, he also goes by the names of SALINAS and SMILEY

Location: in other people's beds. He also hangs out in Westport at the BUZZARD BEACH, the POINTE, JAZZ and the LAVA ROOM.

Price: $5 (as that is all he is worth). Would also be willing to trade for some dog toys as I have bought a dog to replace him. They both go around sniffing crotches, the difference being the dog comes when I call and is toilet trained.

Shipping: is free, but I would highly recommend you get shipping insurance, as Asshole Husband will not make it from his place to yours if he comes across some T&A, anywhere.

Accessories: yes, he does come with accessories! Asshole Husband will arrive with a closetful of clothes, perfumes and watches I bought him. He will also bring some pots and pans for you to cook with, a mop and broom for you to clean with, and some flavored massage oil for the (daily) request that you suck his incredibly small, stinky dick. Also he will bring Valtrex for the Herpes he will give you, and some welfare coupons for the baby(s) he will beg you to have but will be unable to support. FINALLY...and this is an ongoing accessory..expect to have growing mountains of beer cans in every possible square inch of living space...because Asshole Husband is an alcoholic, but not the kind that goes to AA, the kind that gets DWIs.

Supported Software: you will need to buy some translation software when you get Asshole Husband, because he speaks mangled English when he is sober (rare) and garbled gibberish when he is drunk (most of the time).

Thank you for your interest. I prefer paypal.