I feel like a million dollars.

[William769]

I met my life partner when I was 25 years old, I felt that we had a fairy tale love with the two of us nothing could hurt us we were invincible. But that was not to be somehow HIV came into the picture & after 16 years of being together I lost David to AIDS. That was six years ago.

I grieved for David & I did in such a hard way to the point that I didn't want to live anymore I felt my life was over. I was 41 years old when he passed & HIV positive what kind of life was I going to have? I took life one day at a time & refused to look at the big picture simply because I did not want to be alone intimately.

Before David I had a couple of guys I dated but nothing serious, back then dating in our lifestyle is not what it is today.

Now I am 47 I still miss David but realize he is in a better place & my life must go forward. About six weeks ago I went to a singles party for HIV positive men and I met Dino, he is quite a bit younger than me (he's 31) for some reason we hit it off & for the past six weeks we have been dating. Well last night after dinner Dino told me that he wanted to take our relationship to the next level and stay the night. I was shocked, scared, mortified to say the least. what did he see in me plus David instantly came into my mind. I asked him To please give me a couple of minutes to think about it he understood he knows my past with David. I agreed to his offer & after walking on the beach for awhile we went back to my place. needless to say fireworks ensued.

I woke up early this morning in a haze thinking what a wonderful dream I had last night I rolled ove & there was Dino, once again I was in shock that this actually happened. I asked myself again, what did he see in me? I got up made breakfast & brought it to him in bed. He looked at me & said thank you thats all he said. After breakfeast he wanted to make plans for Saturday night.

Now this relationship may not go very far, but at least for awhile I feel alive again.

I posted this for all to read in the hopes if there is anyone out there that has felt the way I have felt over the past couple of years, life goes on.