Reply #34: As I was sitting behind an M 60 just inside the front gate awaiting attack,

[alfredo]

I wasn't praying, I was wondering how long it will take for the unseen enemy to vaporize me. I had never fired an M 60, nor has anyone in my squad. We didn't even know if the machine gun even fired. The one box of ammo was Korean war vintage. Word came down that a force of 3,000 were on the way toward us. I was dead, I was just waiting for it to become official. I didn't become a Christian, I didn't fall on my knees to pray. I was just waiting and worrying if I can put up a good fight, if my feeder can perform for us, and if my death would be painful. It was over for me, my life had ended.

The attack never came. No explanation, no apologies, just silence. Tensions were high, there was talk of abandoning our station. Our unit would go first, before dependents. We'd been working sixteen hours straight for nearly two months. We lived on cigarettes, meth, alcohol, and coffee. We were wired and worn out before the alarm went up. It was probably a drill, but a drill without telling us it was a drill. Fuckin lifers. To a man, we knew we were dead. Everything changed for us because of that ugly stunt. Drinking and fighting increased. Anti Army sentiment grew. Bad attitude was the norm.

I crawled into the machine gun nest an Atheist, I left an Atheist.