Reactions to the Tiger Mom book

[bluestateguy]

I have yet to read the book, but I think I will.

I did, however, read two good Time magazine articles about it yesterday. I have to say that Amy Chua's book leaves me with a lot of mixed opinions that will likely not satisfy people with strongly held pro or anti views. I will say this though, I am glad the book was written because it will activate a conversation that needs to be held.

The positive: I applaud parents who implore their kids to work hard, study hard, do their best, behave themselves and respect others. Too many parents are unable or unwilling to do that. I have always been frustrated amid all of these around-in-circles debates about public education how few people seem to want to talk about parental responsibility. The conservative approach to parental responsibility is for parents to blame the teachers, blame the unions and blame the politicians. The liberal approach to parental responsibility is to make excuse after excuse as to why parents can't be more involved in their children's education. I don't think you see any of those problems from Chua.

The negative: First, there is such a thing as overdoing it. Not accepting any grade lower than an A? Few children will go their whole school career and only get A's. And only one child can be #1 or the valedictorian. You are setting your household up for a lot of friction if you set expectations that high ALL OF THE TIME. No TV or video games? Come on now. In small doses these can actually be good things (video games can teach strategy, split second thinking and hand eye coordination) if properly regulated and managed by parents, and I for one think parents should encourage educational TV in the home as well.

Then there are elements of class privilege here that also need to be looked at. Piano lessons, violin lessons, ballet; that's all great if you as a parent can provide all of those things, but it is not an option for even a lot of middle class parents. If Chua's girls go to public schools, I suspect they are excellent functional suburban public schools, which is a big advantage that not all families will have.