Bush, Press joke about how bad things are

[TOOLZ]

Bush doesn't get to make jokes about how fucked things are, IMHO.


Bush Pokes Fun at Himself at Press Dinner

By DARLENE SUPERVILLE, Associated Press Writer

WASHINGTON - President Bush (news - web sites) poked fun at himself at the press corps Saturday night and offered a new reason for overhauling the Social Security (news - web sites) system. Raising the name of Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, Bush said, "We have to fix it or Rumsfeld may never retire."

Bush noted — with a little help — the presence of a number of new Cabinet members attending the Gridiron Club's 120th annual dinner.

Turning to Vice President Dick Cheney (news - web sites), the president said, "Dick, maybe you can point them out to me."

Some of the press skits he had watched earlier in a long evening were about steroid use in professional sports, but Bush said that in looking out at the press corps he was confident none of them were on steroids.

"Those are all natural bodies," he said.

Bush said anyone looking for a transcript of the evening's program should call Doug Wead, the longtime Bush family friend who recently made public tape recordings of private telephone conversations he had with Bush before he started running for president.

The president noted that former President Clinton (news - web sites) was recovering from surgery and said that "when he woke up he was surrounded by his loved ones" — his wife, daughter and "my dad."

The former President Bush and Clinton have become something of an item despite their once fierce political rivalry.

Earlier in the evening, a woman pretending to be John Kerry (news - web sites)'s wife sang about how happy she is that he wasn't elected. Karl Rove revealed his successful strategy for winning President Bush a second term. Wannabe presidential candidates pressed for advantage in the 2008 race.

It was as close to "Saturday Night Live" as Washington gets, as journalists assumed the personas of politicians in song, dance and wisecracks.

The Gridiron Dinner is a journalistic tradition in which, for one night, members of the Fourth Estate turn the tables on the powerful people they report and write about daily. The Gridiron Club's motto is to "singe, but never burn."

In a nod to 2008, they parodied the White House aspirations of Republican Sen. Chuck Hagel (news, bio, voting record) of Nebraska and Democratic Gov. Bill Richardson of New Mexico, featured speakers at the white-tie dinner.

Richardson compared the Bush's administration's treatment of U.S. allies over the Iraq (news - web sites) war to the NCAA (news - web sites) basketball tournament.

"Sixty-four teams start and they're whittled down to just one," Richardson said in prepared remarks. "Kind of reminds me of what we've done with our allies."

Hagel paid tribute to Johnny Carson, a Nebraska legend, by impersonating "Carnac the Magnificent," one of the late comedian's characters.

"Answer: March Madness (news - web sites)," Hagel said. "What do Democrats call my Social Security plan?"

Having observed their routine, Bush called Richardson and Hagel "a couple of independent thinkers, which in my book is a negative."

Following another close presidential election, the show poked fun at despondent Democrats and smug Republicans.

Prison-striped Democratic leaders were seen trying to figure a way out of "Gitmo," the U.S. facility at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, where the government is holding suspected terrorists.

One sketch had Massachusetts Sen. Kerry singing a lament about "why, oh why, oh why did I ever lose Ohio?" while in the next scene wife Teresa Heinz Kerry appeared positively giddy over her husband's loss to Bush.

"Thank heaven, he lost the race," her character sang to the tune of "Thank Heaven for Little Girls." "Now I can tell the press just how and when and where to go, and I'm allowed my wine and escargots."

Republicans were singed, too.

To the tune of "Doo Wah Diddy Diddy," a Karl Rove impersonator sang about the challenges of turning Bush into presidential timber. "He looked smug, he looked dim. How we gonna win with him?" he sang. Rumsfeld was rapped for his Iraq war planning. "Rummy, have you some spare Teflon coating that we could wear?" soldiers sang to the tune of "Mister Sandman." "You said we'd win Iraq with ease, Mr. Rumsfeld, we need Humvees."

Other 2008-themed skits portrayed Democratic Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (news - web sites) of New York singing about how she'll "turn those red states blue" and Senate newcomer Barack Obama of Illinois, prancing around in a gold outfit and halo, urging the party to "go with a guy who walks on water."

Founded in 1885, the Gridiron Club is made up of Washington news bureau chiefs, columnists, reporters, cartoonists and editors. It exists only for the annual dinner and political roast. Every president since Benjamin Harrison, except for Grover Cleveland, has attended.

[GetTheRightVote]

1. How stupid are they becoming ............. very

:kick:

[hippiechick]

2. ugh.

Further proof that inside the loop isn't much more than a good ole boys club, and the problems of the common plebe simply don't matter.


Groan.

[Zorra]

10. Yeah. Rumsfeld needing SS to retire on really is a joke.....

Donald Rumsfeld's biography
Chicago Magazine
The Don
By Carol Felsenthal
snip---
When he moved from Washington to Chicago in 1977 to take the job at Searle, Rumsfeld had to take an advance from the company to buy a house in Winnetka. But Searle made Rumsfeld a wealthy man; according to financial disclosure documents, his fortune today is estimated at between $50 million and $210 million......

http://www.geocities.com/rummyfan/chicagomag.html

[ashmanonar]

3. ok, this is kinda funny..

'The president noted that former President Clinton (news - web sites) was recovering from surgery and said that "when he woke up he was surrounded by his loved ones" — his wife, daughter and "my dad."'

but most of those jokes are in bad taste, imo. i'm all for a president having fun at his own expense, but i think bush doesn't really have a place to make jokes when people starve in middle america. fix the problems in america first, get us out of oil wars, then we can hear you make jokes.

[rockedthevoteinMA]

4. I have no words to express how I feel about this.

:cry:

[Hand]

14. I do...

Feh!

[dweller]

5. this is funny?

"Prison-striped Democratic leaders were seen trying to figure a way out of "Gitmo," the U.S. facility at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, where the government is holding suspected terrorists."


:wow:


dp

[Old and In the Way]

6. Sounds like Comedy Night

on the Titanic.

[ewagner]

7. Has it occurred to anybody

that these guys are their own little society?

that they care only for what goes on within their little group?

That it doesn't matter to them who is in power as long as they get to keep their positions of privilege?

That none of Bush*'s crimes matter to them?

This just sickens me.......

it's an exclusive club.....we're not allowed in, we're just allowed to look in the window and "admire" them.....

this kind of crap is turning me into a revolutionary......a radical...

[rockedthevoteinMA]

11. Yes and it's doing the same to many across the country

especially in my little corner...even my grandparents, who are in their 70's.

It's sad, and disgusting - but at the same time my mother pointed out today that it is making us all firm in our beliefs, and making us take a stand for them - and most of us (well my sister, boyfriend and I) were pretty uninterested until the war began in 2003.

edited for horrible grammar. :(

[glitch]

12. That is the only bright side of * - he's waking people up.

So maybe he was chosen by God after all ;)

[Book Lover]

17. Yes, when government by and for the people is revolutionary

it's either 1776 or 2005.

[Robbien]

8. Rude and crude.

And corporate elite media thinks this is funny.

[TahitiNut]

9. "Bush poked fun at himself"??? Where?

Everything I read was mean-spirited bashing of liberals and anyone suffering under this regime. Humor? Like greasing the tips of crutches.

[Sydnie]

13. They obviously only like it when it's a "summer camp" type skit

done by amateurs. They couldn't shriek loudly enough when a smart professional comedian (Whoopi for example) pokes "fun" at them.

Hypocrites, one and all.

[VegasWolf]

15. Sounds like comedy night at the Westborough Baptist Church. n/t

[Zerex71]

16. They're really frickin' funny.

Tell that to the thousands of people who've died since they took over in their junta.

[Moderator]

18. locking..as per DU rules

Please be aware that DU copyright rules require that excerpts of copyrighted material be limited to four paragraphs and must include a link to the original source.

Please feel free to repost within the guidelines. TIA