Sex, the final frontier: Nasa acts to ensure that astronauts don't follow

[RamboLiberal]

http://news.independent.co.uk/world/science_technology/story.jsp?story=516336

In the First World War, frontline troops who were away from their loved ones for long periods famously had bromide put into their tea to reduce the distraction of their sexual drive. But yesterday it was suggested that such measures might be taken a lot further - to Mars, in fact.

Dr Rachel Armstrong, speaking yesterday at a British Interplanetary Society symposium on the Human Future and Space, said the US space agency Nasa was considering how to deal with the natural urges of astronauts travelling on long journeys such as a three-year trip to Mars, where the six-strong crew would be likely to include two women.

"Nasa is talking about the chemical sterilisation of astronauts on longer journeys," Dr Armstrong said, in a talk discussing the problems humanity may face in trying to reach the planets and, eventually, the stars.

Nasa was nonplussed by the suggestion yesterday. "I haven't heard anything about that," said a spokesman at Nasa's Johnson Space Centre, where the long-range trips announced by President George Bush in January are being planned.

Why don't they just send some fundie astronauts? Captain Kirk sure wouldn't qualify for *'s astronaut group.

[codegreen]

1. why not just screen them to only send uninhibited pansexuals?

[Wapsie B]

2. Fundie astronauts?

God, they'd never be able to hold back. A lifetime of repressing those urges just to make babies. We'd damn near have an orgy every day up there.

[daleo]

3. Since we are now in the parallel reverse bizzaro universe

This would be the universe of evil Kirk. Since good Kirk was a horndog, evil Kirk would perforce be a puritan. So, I think Kirk would qualify in this brave new world.

[KissMyAsscroft]

4. I think we all see the answer here...

gay astronauts.

[FlemingsGhost]

12. As long as they don't explore Uranus.

Thank you... I'll be here all week.

(on edit: better punchline.)

[Melsky]

5. Why can't they just have sex

or masturbate?

[Chicago Democrat]

11. it messes up the inside of their suits

[Kitsune]

21. So they can take a leak in there

but whacking off is a no-no?

Besides, I doubt John Q. Astronaut is going to stop in the middle of a spacewalk to jerk off. Honestly, the only problem I'd see with sex in a spacecraft is the mess potential, and one little condom can fix most of that.

Oh, and leverage might be an issue as well...but that's what velcro is for.

[farmbo]

23. Just send up married couples...they never have sex.

:crazy:

[BiggJawn]

33. That's what I was thinking....

But what happens when they form a swap club?

[farmbo]

34. Couldn't work...no sets of keys for the spacecraft...no key party possible

NASA's thought of everything!

:party:

[arcos]

6. they could send only gays and lesbians...

the the right wing would never be able to consider them heroes, though... :P

[mike1963]

7. I grok it.

:D

[DAGDA56]

8. I can see the recruiting posters...

...become an ASTRONAUT! Adventure! Great pay and benefits! and We Cut off your Balls! Where do I sign up?

[SoDesuKa]

9. Weightless Sex

Just imagine the 1001 Kama Sutra positions you could get into if you didn't have to worry about gravity. Hoo, hoo! Talk about a zipless fuck!

[kysrsoze]

18. I'd be fuckin' all the way there. Why not? Good exercise.

n/t

[LizW]

10. O-kaaaayyyy.

That should have 'em knockin' each other over to get in line for astronaut training. :wow:

[hunter]

13. Don't ask, don't tell

I have heard from reliable sources that is the official policy.

[American Renaissance]

14. uhh... yeah,

give them a snip and let them do whatever the fuck (no pun intended) they like, their going to have alot of spare time.

[kysrsoze]

19. Easy solution: The Rhythm Method

Ha ha ha!

[jdj]

15. This is ludicrous. They haven't figured out how to

get people to Mars but they are obsessing on astronauts' sex drives?

They need to get out of the lab and get laid.

[Chicago Democrat]

20. Abolish Abortions in Space!

[phaseolus]

16. A pregancy on a 3 year space mission would be a REALLY BAD THING.

/obvious

[0rganism]

25. So use a sterility injection, right?

No reason not to work on the first edition of the Zero-G Kama Sutra while in transit.

[Demonaut]

36. I agree, these astronauts will be exposed to high levels of radiation

during the entire trip and where would you put a 100ft baby?

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

17. "Johnson" Space Centre?

:freak:

[2cents]

22. I'd opt for vasectomy n/t

[0rganism]

24. (a deep resonant voice announces) Eunuchs... In... Space...

(a computer-generated starfield spins to show a slim rocket flying in space)
(the scene cuts away to the bridge of the ship)

Captain Castrato (high soprano voice): Where are the latest fuel reports, ensign?

Ensign Cutaway (in an equally high voice): Well, the situation isn't good. We're going to need more boost from our solar sails to make it to the Mars orbital platform.

(and so on)

[WillyT]

26. Great... The First Earthlings On Mars Will Be rePublicans !!!

And even after they land, there will STILL be no life on Mars!!!

:evilgrin:

[neverforget]

27. Just think: a 3 year supply of condoms!

[yellowcanine]

45. That's only 3 condoms per male. What's the big deal?

Ok, maybe 6 per male to be on the safe side. Or why not just send up all of the same sex? Then it would either be gay sex or self gratification - neither of which will get you pregnant.

[aquart]

28. Most prurient administration in history.

[sniffa]

29. wanna join the "miLLion miLe cLub"?

[gottaB]

30. NASA 14-307-1792

+1 funny, -1 troll, take your pick.

[Mountainman]

31. Wouldn't this be a great opportunity for the Gay community?

Just think, the gay community would be especially qualified since they don't need to reproduce. Or is it just sex that NASA is afraid of?

[The Stranger]

32. They're worried about running into some hot alien sirens.

Wax in the ears worked for Odysseus, but Kirk seemed to do okay with just a pack of Trojans.

[Vladimir]

35. Not fair!

I wanna have sex in space! LOL

[a560]

37. there's a good reason not to have sex in space

children, pure and simple we dont know what effect low gravity and high radiation would have on the development on a fetus. That said, I think the honor system is good enough for people as profestional as astronauts are.

[Vladimir]

39. There are ways and means

;)

[ironflange]

38. As Isaac Asimov once said

"Sex in space would resemble the dance, not like sex on earth, which resembles digging ditches."

Or something to that effect, I'm relying on memory here.

[drfemoe]

40. This thread is too funny .

much needed laughter ..

The ugly truth is that if the medieval lords spent half as much time procuring sex as they do trying to stop it, they would quit trying to stop it.

[XNASA]

41. A married couple has already flown aboard Endeavour....

Astonauts Mark Lee and Jan Davis on STS-47.



That's them in the lower left-hand corner.

[XNASA]

42. And they were newlyweds at the time....

Having met each other while training for that particular mission.

[yellowcanine]

43. Why not allow only oral and anal sex?

And sending "fundies" would not work. Their rate of premarital and extramarital sex is as high as any other group.

[yellowcanine]

44. Fly me to Mars?

Sorry, couldn't resist.