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top10 ADMIN Donating Member (155 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-27-08 11:20 PM
Original message
The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 334
Edited on Mon Apr-28-08 12:17 AM by EarlG


The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 334

April 28, 2008
Ever Decreasing Zirkle Edition

You may not know who Tony Zirkle (1) is, but you're about to find out. Elsewhere, George W. Bush (2,6) shakes his booty, John McCain (3,5) demonstrates his leadership qualities, and John Ashcroft (10) explains torture. Don't forget the key!



Tony Zirkle batshit crazy batshit crazy batshit crazy

There's a hot primary battle going on right now - and no, I'm not talking about the Democratic presidential race. Several Republican contenders are curently fighting hard to become their party's nominee for Indiana's 2nd Congressional District, and they're pulling out all the stops.

Take GOP candidate Tony Zirkle, for example, who made a campaign promise to speak to any group who would invite him - and kept that promise last week, prompting WSBT-TV to run with this headline:

GOP candidate Zirkle addresses Nazi gathering

Yes, last week Zirkle accepted the invitaton of the American National Socialist Workers Party and spoke at their special dinner to celebrate the 119th anniversary of Hitler's birthday. Look, there's even a picture (and no, it's not Photoshopped):


Zirkle's initial excuse was that he was merely trying to convert the neo-Nazis to Christianity. "If you want to witness to people, if you want to share your message with people, you have to talk to them," he said. "By not taking a risk and going out there and addressing issues that your enemies can paint you as a racist or a bigot, then we're never going to address them."

I see. Perhaps that excuse would hold more water if Zirkle hadn't said in March that "segregating African-Americans in separate states is an issue that deserves to be debated."

But it turns out this was all just a misunderstanding - Tony Zirkle gave another reason for appearing at the dinner last week, prompting the South Bend Tribune to run with this headline:

GOP candidate defends speech at Nazi gathering

It turns out that...

Zirkle said he feels he was misunderstood. His real mission, he said, is to rid the country of pornography, and that's what he was saying at the ANSWP gathering.

And what does the fight against pornography have to do with attending a dinner honoring Hitler's birthday?

"Most of the male porn stars were Jewish at the beginning," Zirkle explained.



George W. Bush loser

The economy is collapsing, oil is $120 a barrel, food riots are breaking out across the world, war is raging in the Middle East - so why is Our Great Leader dancing?




If you guessed, "because he's crazier than a shithouse rat," give yourself a pat on the back.

In fact George W. Bush has developed quite a penchant for strutting his stuff lately. In the past twelve months he's performed tribal dances...


...sword dances...


... even tap dances.


I guess when you know that you're going to live out the rest of your life with the blood of thousands on your hands, and then be remembered forever as the worst president in U.S. history, dancing's the only thing that keeps you going.



John McCain excessive spin hypocrisy

John McCain went to New Orleans last week and vowed that "Never again, never again, will a disaster of this nature be handled in the disgraceful way it was handled."

Republican presidential candidate John McCain took stock of still-hurricane-damaged areas of New Orleans on Thursday and declared that if the disaster had happened on his watch, he would have immediately landed at the nearest Air Force base, drawing a sharp contrast to President Bush's handling of the tragedy.

McCain called the response to Hurricane Katrina "a perfect storm" of mismanagement by federal, state and local governments.

Hurricane Katrina struck the Gulf Coast on August 29, 2005. According to Wikipedia:

At 6:10 AM CDT (1110 UTC), Hurricane Katrina made its second landfall as a Category 4 hurricane near Buras-Triumph, Louisiana, with sustained winds of more than 135 mph (191 km/h). Katrina also made landfall in St. Bernard parish and St. Tammany parish for a total of three landfalls in Louisiana.

By 8:00 AM CDT (1300 UTC), in New Orleans, water was seen rising on both sides of the Industrial Canal.

At approximately 8:14 AM CDT (1314 UTC), the New Orleans office of the National Weather Service issues a Flash Flood Warning for Orleans Parish and St Bernard Parish, citing a levee breach at the Industrial Canal. The National Weather Service predicted three to eight feet of water and advised people in the warning area to "move to higher ground immediately."

By 9:00 AM CDT (2100 UTC), there was 6-8 feet of water in the Lower Ninth Ward.

At 10:00 AM CDT (1500 UTC), Hurricane Katrina made its third landfall near Pearlington, Mississippi and Slidell, Louisiana, with sustained winds of 120 mph (193 km/h) after crossing Breton Sound.

So where was George W. Bush while this was going on? What was so important that he couldn't jump onto a plane and fly to the disaster-stricken area, just like John McCain would have? Funny story...


That's right - George W. Bush wasn't on his way to the Gulf Coast because he was too busy celebrating John McCain's birthday.

While this was going on:


This was going on:


To recap, while this was going on:


This was going on:


But let's be fair to McCain. As you can clearly see from the photographs, he's doing everything he can to explain the magnitude of the disaster to Bush, and urging him to get back on the plane and head immediately to the disaster-stricken area.


I guess when McCain says, "Never again, never again, will a disaster of this nature be handled in the disgraceful way it was handled," he should probably add, "Unless it happens on my birthday."



Rush Limbaugh just plain evil flip-flopping lying

How desperate is the GOP this year? This desperate...

Talk show host Rush Limbaugh is sparking controversy again after he made comments calling for riots in Denver during the Democratic National Convention this summer. He said the riots would ensure a Democrat is not elected as president, and his listeners have a responsibility to make sure it happens. "Riots in Denver, the Democrat Convention would see to it that we don't elect Democrats," Limbaugh said during Wednesday's radio broadcast. He then went on to say that's the best thing that could happen to the country.

(snip)

Limbaugh said with massive riots in Denver, which he called "Operation Chaos," the people on the far left would look bad.

So much for the "party of ideas," right?

Oh, but wait a minute, it turns out that Rush wasn't trying to incite a riot after all.

Several callers called in to the radio show to denounce Limbaugh's comments, when he later stated, "I am not inspiring or inciting riots, I am dreaming of riots in Denver."

Ah yes, just like Henry II didn't incite his knights to go murder Thomas Beckett in Canterbury Cathedral.

Oh, but wait a minute, it turns out that Rush wasn't even dreaming about riots in Denver. According to the Colorado Daily:

In response to a caller on Thursday's program, Limbaugh appeared to soften his stance. "Who wishes for riots?" he said.

Let me give you a minute to pick your jaws up off the floor after that one.

So, yeah, that's all they've got this year. Hoping for riots. And I hate to break it to Rush, but the Democrats won't be rioting in Denver this year - they'll be far too busy making plans for how best to govern the country after the GOP becomes a footnote in history this November.



John McCain loser

Speaking of desperation: it seems that John McCain is now having difficulty wrapping up the "current Republican president's daughter" demographic.

First daughter Jenna Bush isn't as committed to Republican candidate John McCain as her parents are, who are firmly behind the party's expected presidential nominee.

Jenna Bush told CNN's Larry King that she is open to learning about all the candidates - including the Democrats.

King asked Jenna Bush and her mother, Laura Bush, who appeared with her, whether they had a favorite between Democratic candidates Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.

"My favorite is the Republican," said Laura Bush.

Her daughter wasn't as sure. "I don't know," Jenna Bush said.

Jenna later added, "Wait, isn't McCain the guy who fathered an illegitimate black baby? I don't like that guy."



George W. Bush loser

Good news! President Bush's approval ratings are "holding steady." Bad news! According to the American Research Group, they're holding steady at 22%.

So what's a president to do when faced with some of the lowest approval ratings ever seen? Simple. According to Think Progress:

On Monday, President Bush made a videotaped cameo to NBC's "Deal or No Deal" game show, joking, "I'm thrilled to be anywhere with high ratings these days."

Smart idea, Mr. Prez! Just one problem...

Ironically, the New York Post reports that Bush's appearance was a deal-breaker, "tying the show's worst-ever Monday-night performance." Monday's show had approximately 10 million viewers, "down 27 percent from its season average."

But that didn't stop Our Great Leader, oh no. Later in the week he made another TV cameo, this time on American Idol.

Earlier in the show, President Bush and first lady Laura Bush announced that the show's "Idol Gives Back" special had raised more than $65 million for various children's charities.

I must admit it's nice to see Bush acknowledge this remarkable piece of fundraising, although I should point out one thing. Do you know how long it takes the United States to spend $65 million in Iraq?

Less than six hours.



Barry McCulley partisanship

Fortunately John McCain has still got some supporters who are willing to do what they can to help him succeed - meet Barry McCulley, mayor of Homewood, Alabama. John McCain was in Homewood last week for a campaign event at Rosewood Hall, a venue owned by the city.

Now, when Democrats want to use Rosewood Hall they have to pay the full price - according to the Birmingham News:

(Robert) Yarbrough (chairman of the Jefferson County Democratic Party) rented the entire hall, three rooms, on Thursday nights in September 2006 and September 2007 for the Democratic Blue Dot Ball fundraiser. The weekday fee is $1,700 for all three rooms, according to the official rates. Yarbrough said the Democrats paid more than $2,500 for all charges each year.

But when Republicans roll into town, it's a different story...

The McCain campaign was charged $250 to use two rooms in the hall, which normally would book for $1,200 on a weeknight.

In case you were wondering, that's an 80% discount.

Oh, and did I mention the slave labor? Turns out that there's a $100 set-up fee at Rosewood Hall, but McCain didn't have to pay because his campaign was given "free labor from Homewood City Jail inmates to set up tables and chairs for the event." How convenient.

Of course, this didn't go down too well with the rest of Homewood's city council.

City Councilman David Hooks said that the council typically debates and votes each time there is a request to discount or waive the rent, but that didn't happen this time. "I'd be concerned with the legal ramifications of that, from the city's perspective," Hooks said. "It could be a problem for the city to have made in-kind donations to a political candidate by charging less rent or having inmates do work for the event."

(snip)

Homewood police Chief Phil Dodd said city jail inmates had never before set up at Rosewood Hall, but did so at the mayor's request.

We hear that McCain is going to repay this kindness by allowing McCulley to hold a wedding reception up his ass.



The Bush Administration dumb

Hey, did you know that the U.S. military has developed secret technology for countering improvised explosive devices (IEDs) in Iraq? According to military.com, "Electronic jammers like the Symphony have saved American lives in a war where the roadside bomb is the number-one killer." That's the good news - now for the bad news.

The U.S. has taken the unprecedented -- and some would say questionable -- step of selling some of its most sophisticated counter-IED technology to the Iraqi government, equipping specialized police, military and interior ministry troops with electronic systems designed to detonate roadside bombs and jam triggering signals.

(snip)

But some might see handing over America's most sophisticated and top secret counter-IED technology to Iraqi ministries, whose loyalty to Baghdad is less than certain, as extremely risky.

(snip)

"You have to assume that about the third one that we ship over there is going to go straight out the back door," said John Pike, director of the Globalsecurity.org, a Washington-area defense research group. "We have a fundamental dilemma here in trying to indigenize these security forces."

But pay no attention to the naysayers. This is Iraq! What could possibly go wrong?



Douglas Bruce batshit crazy racism

Republican state representative Douglas Bruce of Colorado first made it onto the list back in mid-January - coincidentally his first week on the job - and at the time I noted that we'd probably be seeing more of him.

Well, courtesy of the Denver Post, here's what Mr. Bruce has been up to since he was featured in Idiots 321.

January

* Drew the ire of some lawmakers for delaying his start date in the statehouse so that he would serve less than half of a two- year term. That allows him to run for an additional eight years in the House instead of six.

* Became the first lawmaker in state history punished with censure after kicking a photographer on the floor of the House.

February

* Refused to co-sponsor a resolution honoring members of the military - saying he doesn't vote for nonbinding, symbolic resolutions - and was stripped by GOP leadership of a committee assignment as a result.

April

* Was criticized for placing fliers attacking his opponent in this year's GOP primary on the desks of several House Republicans.

Good stuff. So what did Mr. Bruce do to top this off last week?

State Rep. Douglas Bruce's derogatory remarks Monday about Mexican migrant workers could leave him facing a second censure penalty or worse.

"We don't need 5,000 more illiterate peasants in the state of Colorado," Bruce, R-Colorado Springs, said during debate on a bill to speed up a temporary seasonal worker program.

Presumably he then clambered aboard his favorite white charger and galloped back to Castle Bruce where he raised the drawbridge, kicked his jester, and spent some quality time in the privy.



John Ashcroft excessive spin

And finally: back in the year 2000 when George W. Bush ran for president under the banner of "compassionate conservatism" and a "humble foreign policy" it was hard to imagine that eight years later serious people would be debating whether or not it's okay for the American government to torture people. Of course, the Bush Administration insists that we do not torture. However, the Bush Administration also thinks that torture isn't torture unless you cause organ failure. So what exactly is torture?

Thanks goodness we have former Attorney General John "Statue Boobs" Ashcroft to finally draw a bright, clear line for us. During an appearance at Knox College last week, Ashcroft was asked the following question by a student:

After WWII, the Tokyo Tribunal was basically the Nuremberg Trials for Japan. Many Japanese leaders were put on trial for war crimes and crimes against humanity, including torture. And among the tortures listed was the "water treatment," which we nowadays call waterboarding ... The judgment describes this water treatment, and I quote, "the victim was bound or otherwise secured in a prone position; and water was forced through his mouth and nostrils into his lungs and stomach." One man, Yukio Asano, was sentenced to fifteen years hard labor by the allies for waterboarding American troops to obtain information. Since Yukio Asano was trying to get information to help defend his country - exactly what you, Mr. Ashcroft, say is acceptable for Americans to do - do you believe that his sentence was unjust?

Good question! Now here's rest of the exchange, as described by the student who asked it:

ASHCROFT: (angrily) Now, listen here. You're comparing apples and oranges, apples and oranges. We don't do anything like what you described.

ME: I'm sorry, I was under the impression that we still use the method of putting a cloth over someone's face and pouring water down their throat...

ASHCROFT: (interrupting, red-faced, shouting) Pouring! Pouring! Did you hear what she said? "Putting a cloth over someone's face and pouring water on them." That's not what you said before! Read that again, what you said before!

ME: Sir, other reports of the time say...

ASHCROFT: (shouting) Read what you said before! (cries of "Answer her fucking question!" from the audience) Read it!

ME: (firmly) Mr. Ashcroft, please answer the question.

ASHCROFT: (shouting) Read it back!

ME: "The victim was bound or otherwise secured in a prone position; and water was forced through his mouth and nostrils into his lungs and stomach."

ASHCROFT: (shouting) You hear that? You hear it? "Forced!" If you can't tell the difference between forcing and pouring...does this college have an anatomy class? If you can't tell the difference between forcing and pouring...

Aha, finally, it all makes perfect sense! Get it? If you are tied down and water is forced into your mouth and lungs, it's torture. If on the other hand you are tied down and water is poured into your mouth and lungs, it's not torture. Thanks for the explanation, Mr. Ashcroft!

Just in case you're still confused, Ashcroft also made an appearance at St. John's University last week, where he told students:

ASHCROFT: Going to a high school dance, having to listen to loud music, to me that's torture. I was on the Daily Show once. I was interviewed by Jon Stewart. That was torture.

So I hope that clears that up. See you next week...

-- EarlG
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Oldtimeralso Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-27-08 11:41 PM
Response to Original message
1. Tony Zirkle is from Indiana not Illinois
We have some good Dem's in Illinois Sen. Dick Durbin (who voted against the IWR) and both Democratic candidates have roots in Illinois.
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EarlG ADMIN Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:17 AM
Response to Reply #1
6. Oops
Thanks, fixed it.
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intaglio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 02:08 AM
Response to Reply #6
14. I accuse you of listening
to "The Blues Brothers" too many times

Jake: Hey, what's going on?
Police Officer: Ah, those bums won their court case so they're marching today.
Jake: What bums?
Police Officer: The fucking Nazi party.
Elwood: Illinois Nazis!
Jake: I hate Illinois Nazis.
.
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FVZA_Colonel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 06:31 PM
Response to Reply #14
39. "I hate Illinois Nazis!"
So THAT'S where the quote came from; I've seen it all over the web and until now I never saw the context.
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The Doctor. Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-27-08 11:44 PM
Response to Original message
2. Hehehe...
"Somehow I have a feeling that this might not be the last we see of Douglas Bruce..."

Well done.
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Oldtimeralso Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-27-08 11:47 PM
Response to Original message
3. Barry McCulley just cut a deal
to make Bud the official beer of Rosewood Hall.
so McLame got a break.
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Apr-27-08 11:56 PM
Response to Original message
4. Why do we keep electing fucking morons? I dont get it.
It seems to me that our leaders should be smarter than we are, but they're not.m
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rambler_american Donating Member (565 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 05:21 AM
Response to Reply #4
17. Why do we keep electing fucking morons? We Don't.
The repugs keep stealing elections and the fucking morons keep letting them. Shit's gotta stop!
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-29-08 10:46 AM
Response to Reply #17
47. That doesnt explain local elections.
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DeepModem Mom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:16 AM
Response to Original message
5. K&R
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DeepModem Mom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:20 AM
Response to Original message
7. EarlG, I'd like to thank you for this each week, with venom directed not toward fellow DUers...
and Dem candidates, but at our political opponents. THANK YOU!

K, and, of course, R!
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Number23 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:20 AM
Response to Original message
8. You have a winner...
A more fitting choice for the number one spot would be hard to find. That guy needs to be Number 1 every single week.
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armodem08 Donating Member (186 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:34 AM
Response to Original message
9. Good one:
"John "Statue Boobs" Ashcroft"


ROFLMAO!

Thanks for making my evening!
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krispos42 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 01:02 AM
Response to Original message
10. I actually facepalmed my self, hard, at #1
*SMACK*

Oh. My. God.

"'Most of the male porn stars were Jewish at the beginning,' Zirkle explained."

:wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow: :wow:

The stupid, it hurts!!!

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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 01:20 AM
Response to Original message
11. OMG EARLG
TELL ME YOU MADE UP THAT STUFF ABOUT ZIRKLE - I CANNOT BRING MYSELF TO GOOGLE! :o
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ekwhite Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 07:50 AM
Response to Reply #11
23. No, he didn't make it up
Tony Zirkle is actually that bad.
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Kibitzer 2006 Donating Member (78 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 01:34 AM
Response to Original message
12. Ashcroft adds clarity to the torture debate
OK, I think we're making progress. We thought that John Yoo had resolved the issue in his infamous memo (you can start here and work back):
...limited the definition of torture to physical pain "equivalent in intensity to the pain accompanying serious physical injury, such as organ failure, impairment of bodily function, or even death." It was the administration's so-called "golden shield" which permitted the CIA to use its most aggressive interrogation techniques, such as water boarding.

Now my first response was that surely being forced to inhale water induces physical pain equivalent to the pain accompanying organ failure (lungs) and impairment of bodily function (breathing). I see now that I was wrong. The victim is not "forced" to inhale water, but is merely placed in a condition under which his instinctive bodily functions are sure to eventually cause him to inhale water. That makes all the difference.

In any event, we must remember that John Yoo was a lowly Assistant Attorney General, but Ashcroft was the Attorney General, and we should therefore defer to his opinion. We have known for some time that the simple, clear, bright-line definition of "torture" is "that which we do not do". Ashcroft has now supplied two examples of what is torture (techniques that we might have applied to Abu Zubaydah and his colleagues, but, due our high moral principles, chose not to):
  • Taking him to a high school dance, where he might have had to listen to loud music
  • Putting him on the Daily Show to be interviewed by Jon Stewart
I'll add a few more techniques which would clearly constitute "torture" under the "that which we do not do" standard:
  • According him his basic human rights under Common Article 3 of the Geneva Conventions
  • According him the rights guaranteed in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights
  • According him the basic rights we inherited from British Common Law (the presumption of innocence, the right to confront one's accusers, ...)
  • Taking him to Baskin Robin's for ice cream
  • ...
    All of these techniques would have been torture, since they are "that which we do not do". Thank you, John Ashcroft, for clarifying that.

    --Kibitzer
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moonbatmax Donating Member (290 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 11:41 PM
Response to Reply #12
45. Ashcroft and Musical Torture
Taking him to a high school dance, where he might have had to listen to loud music

This from the guy who "blessed" us with Let the Eagle Soar?
Maybe he was thinking of something like this?
Sort of ironic that I happened to hear that one just today, for the first time in... years.
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scarface2004 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 01:46 AM
Response to Original message
13. hey republicon voters?? what the hell are you doing??
republicons are so pathetic.
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happygoluckytoyou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 02:32 AM
Response to Original message
15. I GOT THE NUMBER 2 FIGURED OUT.......
Give 'em the old double whammy
Daze and dizzy 'em
Back since the days of old Methuselah
Everyone loves the big bambooz-a-ler

Give 'em the old three ring circus
Stun and stagger 'em
When you're in trouble, go into your dance

Though you are stiffer than a girder
They'll let you get away with murder
Razzle dazzle 'em
And you've got a romance

IS IT ANY WONDER DUBYA ENDS UP NUMBER 2 PRETTY MUCH EVERY WEEK?

WITH RATINGS OF 22... AT LEAST WE WILL ONLY HAVE TO HEAR "PRESIDENT BUSH HAS HIT A NEW LOW"
22 TIMES....
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Kaleko Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 03:09 AM
Response to Original message
16. Lovely public service, Earl.
Makes a weary nation wanna kick ass even more vigorously.

Thnx xxx
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SalmonChantedEvening Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 05:30 AM
Response to Original message
18. Keyboard killer!!
"Presumably he then clambered aboard his favorite white charger and galloped back to Castle Bruce where he raised the drawbridge, kicked his jester, and spent some quality time in the privy"

bahahahaha :rofl: :spray:

Zirkle will be an FNC anchor by 2010.

Thank you EarlG!! :hi: :pals: :yourock:
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annabanana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 05:43 AM
Response to Original message
19. Does Ashcroft ever have trouble sleeping?
I know he keeps me awake nights...
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johnlal Donating Member (974 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 06:19 AM
Response to Original message
20. Hey Ashcroft
Gravity is force. Didn't they teach physics at your school?
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nxylas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:06 AM
Response to Reply #20
24. That's science. Republicans don't do science
Ashcroft probably believes in Intelligent Falling.
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ladym55 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:39 PM
Response to Reply #20
42. Physics is SCIENCE
So I'm guessing that good John didn't study that in school ... would have interfered with his deeply felt religious beliefs. (You know, how the dinosaurs were on the ark with Noah and stuff)
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DeeDeeNY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 06:43 AM
Response to Original message
21. This is Iraq -- What could possibly go wrong?
This group has really set the bar high as far as anyone ever coming even close to them in stupidity and incompetence.
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rasputin1952 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 06:57 AM
Response to Original message
22. #10...Let's just see what Ashcroft thinks after he undergoes
waterboarding. After all, nothing like first hand knowledge through experience. Odd how those who never have to face such things, believe they are "OK".

I never thought I'd see our nation stoop so low. I am ashamed.
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rpannier Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:09 AM
Response to Original message
25. Douglas Bruce R-Colorado Springs.It about says it all
I served at Ft Carson from 90-92 and Colorado Springs was fairly 'bat-sh*t' crazy back then.
The city had more fundamentalist-evangelical churches than doctors.

The local news paper was the Colorado Springs Gazette-Telegraph (A member of the freedom papers network)

I'm assuming it hasn't changed much -- which is a pity.
A lot of nice scenery in the area.

Used to have a great bookstore-theater "Poor Richards" (I think was the name) It was near Colorado College. I heard they tore it down -- figures
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momster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:59 AM
Response to Original message
26. American Idio...Idol
According to the TV column in the Post, Idol Gives Back raised 11 mil *less* than the year before. Now this info re: Deal or No Deal's poor ratings with GWB's appearance. Coincidence? Hmmmm....
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RabbitDad Donating Member (2 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #26
40. Re: American Idio...Idol
Now this info re: Deal or No Deal's poor ratings with GWB's appearance. Coincidence? Hmmmm....

Now, be nice. I understand W was rejected from "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader".
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momster Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:27 PM
Response to Reply #40
41. Welcome, Rabbit Dad!
Enjoy DU!
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yardwork Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 10:37 AM
Response to Original message
27. "because he's crazier than a shithouse rat,"
really sums up every single Republican.

Well done, as usual, EarlG!

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IronLionZion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 11:03 AM
Response to Original message
28. Jewish porn stars!
The awesome thing is that the incumbent Democrat is going win big in that district. That's why freaks like Zirkle are allowed to run as Republicans.

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Withywindle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:21 PM
Response to Reply #28
30. That's in the Protocols of the Elders of Zion, isn't it?
The uncut, unrated edition.
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IronLionZion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:24 PM
Response to Reply #30
31. Yes, unrated is fine but all editions have to be "cut"
OUCH!!! :rofl:

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Withywindle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:30 PM
Response to Reply #31
33. AHAHAH!!
Yes, I suppose they'd learn very early in life about the importance of "editing."
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Festivito Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:17 PM
Response to Original message
29. Pouring uses the FORCE of gravity, thus forcing the water...
Funny in a sick way how "We don't do anything like what you described." becomes one word different, then EXACTLY, like, described.

Anatomy? Try physics, oh useless boob.
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gibbyman Donating Member (78 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:26 PM
Response to Original message
32. Did Jenna Bush really added
isn't McCain the guy who fathered an illegitimate black baby? I don't like that guy. why am I just getting this

:patriot:
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ejbr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 02:47 PM
Response to Reply #32
37. No.
Anything EarlG writes outside of block quotes should not be taken literally. Although by asking the question, you confirm that her thinking this is not beyond the realm of reason.
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rocktivity Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 12:49 PM
Response to Original message
34. John Ashcroft criticizing music is like Hugh Hefner criticzing pimps.
Warning: this link contains material which many not be suitable for music lovers.

x(
rocknation
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futureliveshere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 01:31 PM
Response to Original message
35. Oh wow.. Amazing post.. Thanks.. K&R
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 02:18 PM
Response to Original message
36. those photos of McCain and Katrina survivors
would make a great commercial.
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ejbr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 02:52 PM
Response to Original message
38. Limbaugh
I actually heard that show.

In response to a caller on Thursday's program, Limbaugh appeared to soften his stance. "Who wishes for riots?" he said.

In response to his response, the caller said, "'Who wishes for riots?' Why YOU do mutha fucka!!! That's why I'm callin'!"

Are Republicans really this fuckin' lame? They are like another species!

Thanks Earl!
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ladym55 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:43 PM
Response to Original message
43. Thanks for the awesome pictures of the dancing Chimpy
:rofl:

Maybe he could go on Dancing with the Stars while awaiting trial for war crimes?

Oh, wait, he just proved he HURTS ratings, doesn't help them. Never mind.
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polmaven Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-28-08 08:47 PM
Response to Original message
44. I'm confused!
You're telling us that Douglas Bruce galloped back to Castle Bruce where he raised the drawbridge, kicked his jester, and spent some quality time in the privy.

I knew that Minneapolis/St.Paul airport had jesters, but I didn't know about the drawbridges and castles!

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muriel_volestrangler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-29-08 06:34 AM
Response to Original message
46. There's even more to Zirkle - "Derringers for Dildos"
Via Sadly, No!:

I'm considering discussing divorce aids and my plans for a "Derrenger's for Dildos" policy to put guns in American women's hands instead of divorce aids. Presently, when a criminal is arrested for a weapons crime, the prosecutors seek orders to destroy those weapons. What a waste! Put our criminal prisoners to work modifying those guns to be smart-guns that can only be fired when the female owner is holding it so that children don't hurt themselves and so that criminals can't use them (unless they use the woman's hand). When a women turns in her stash of divorce aids, then give her a free gun to defend America when the jihadists follow us home.

I may discuss the historical fact that before there were Nazi doctors, there were divorce aid doctors who used these divorce aids to "treat" "hysterical" women. Is there an etymological connection between hysterical and hysterectomy?

http://www.tonyzirkle.com/campaign /


I think there's a real possibility it's a spoof campaign. Surely no-one can post that seriously?
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FVZA_Colonel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-29-08 07:00 PM
Response to Reply #46
48. After all my years on the Internet, I'm inclined to agree.
That is either the writing of a mentally deranged individual, or the world's greatest Fake Post.
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