what would Jesus say to george dubya bush, were he here today?

[mopaul]

best answer gets a free pass to the rapture, first showing only.

[patchdickens]

1. are you a religious person?

or just looking for a response? because i have 2 answers!

[mopaul]

5. not religious, but i dig jesus

and my question is serious. curious to hear your two answers.

[patchdickens]

20. if you dig Jesus,

you should consider yourself religious. there is absolutely nothing wrong with "digging" Jesus! I know there are so many things wrong with this war but I still think God expects an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth! I cant wait to hear all responses!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[TexasProgresive]

2. * might see Jesus as an Iraqi child in torn and bloody

wedding clothes carrying his head. "Whatever you do to the least of these you do to me."

[TNDemo]

3. Quit making me your scapegoat!

[xultar]

4. Listen you little shit, when I come back I'm gonna whoop your ass!!! n/t

[Jack Rabbit]

6. Something to get Ashcroft to crucify him, I'm sure

[dweller]

7. same thing he said

to the fig tree.

dp

[Poiuyt]

8. "You are the anti-me."

[Ann Arbor Dem]

9. He'd say...

You're going to hell, Georgie.

[Deb]

10. "Go to hell"

[Gman]

11. Look, you sorry piece of shit

if you use My name one more time your sorry ass is coming back as a poor baby in Rwanda.

[markomalley]

12. Is this before or after Bush* has his heart attack...

...he would probably say to the lot of them, "Woe to thee, scribes, Pharisees, hypocrites."

Remember, it was the equivalent of the fundies that were the ones to crucify Him.

[Amaya]

13. You're a hypocrite!

nt

[shamrock]

14. Ye are of your father the devil

Joh 8:44 Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.

[Tinoire]

19. Bingo. And He'll crown it with "Get the away from me!"

Bush serves noboby but Satan himself. Millions will be misled and many of them are following Bush. Bush is indeed an anti-Christ.

[mopaul]

23. 'get thee behind me satan'

turn your swords into plowshares

[Tinoire]

27. Vade retro me satana!

Maybe what we really need is a good exorcist :shrug:

My Liberal friends can laugh but I really do believe Bush is a minion of satan.

[mike1963]

15. "So how come you never read my Sermon on the Mount, asshole?"

...

[checks-n-balances]

16. Here's how I would ask & answer the question...

If *I* were Jesus, here's just some of what I'd say:

"Stop doing all these demonic deeds in my name"

"Stop destroying my greatest creation - the world!"

Then again, he actually did say about The Last Judgment:

(Paraphrased) "I'm telling you the truth: I will say, 'I do NOT know you.'"

[killbotfactory]

17. "I told you to do what? Are you FUCKING CRAZY?!"

Tom Delay would then immediatly issue a statement saying Jesus is endangering our troops and should apologize.

[ben_thayer]

18. You're gone. You are SO gone...

:evilgrin:

[harper]

21. "What the fuck is wrong with you people"

Got that off of the Daily Show when Jon was interviewing Bob Kerry. Chimp and Cheney were due to show up and chat and Bob asked Jon if there was anything Jon wanted him to ask C&C. Jon's response was classic. All my friends and I have adopted it as our own.

[Kod478]

22. Jesus's message

You know the part of the new testament called the Beatitudes?
You were supposed to read or have somebody read it to you and
then practice it in everyday life. Oh, by the way, you're going
straight to hell.

[patchdickens]

25. now now

we are not to judge and "beatitudes"? HUH? please tell me where to go to read THAT!

[Kod478]

28. beatitudes

I don't know if you're joking or what but these are
the beatitudes and apparently they don't apply to Mr. Bush:

Gospel of St. Matthew (v, 3-10)
Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. (Verse 3)
Blessed are the meek: for they shall posses the land. (Verse 4)
Blessed are they who mourn: for they shall be comforted. (Verse 5)
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill. (Verse 6)
Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. (Verse 7)
Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God. (Verse 8)
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. (Verse 9)
Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

[lovedems]

24. Something to the effect of

Last time someone listened to a bush, they wandered the desert for 40 days so keep your mouth shut!

[shamrock]

26. thou art wretched

Here's another one that fits well.

Rev 3:17 Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked:

[leftofthedial]

29. "I don't know who was talking to you . . ."

"...but it wasn't me."

[moondust]

30. Where's the boss Goober?

[exploited]

31. Jesus H. Christ! WTF!

/he WAS a man of the people after all

[Serenity-NOW]

32. * is here today and didn't he say God told him to bomb? n/t

[bigtree]

33. Pack your bags, you're headed for the Middle East. Write this down.

"You have heard it said, "an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth." "But I say to you, do not resist him who is evil, but whoever slaps you on the right cheek turn to him the other also."

"You have heard it said, "You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy."

But I say unto you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you in order that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous.

For if you love those who love you , what reward have you? Do not the tax gatherers do the same? And if you greet your brothers only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same?"

Matthew 5:38
Matthew 5:43-48

[Straight Shooter]

34. Jesus knows better than to speak to a blind and deaf man

Jesus would turn His eyes to heaven, and pray, "Father, forgive him, for he knows what he does, but he does it anyway.

[0007]

35. Jays'us would sez in a low real cool sweet voice,

"junior I see that you have a bent frame and a twisted head full of depraved thoughts." Go yonder and drink the cool water from the well in Fullujah with the many tribes of Abraham. Make peace my son, and then return to your land with your assassin brothers and bug Abraham and his people no more.

Jays'us would also tell junior to learn how to ride a camel.

[Cleita]

36. Stop taking My name in vain and doing those vile thing and

blaming them on Me.

[exploited]

37. My father only speaks through a burning bush

... do you have a match?

[Wind Dancer]

38. I am hesitant to say what I think Jesus would say to Bush!

I'm sure you could guess given certain predictions made in the New Testament!

[myopic4141]

39. First Jesus would have to get over the digust of having to address Bush.

The Jesus would say to Bush "Being a religious individual is not the same as being a person of faith. Having faith implies the using of God's tools to overcome the evil within each of us. You, on the other hand, discard God's tools in favor of the Devil's tools in an 'end justifies the means' approach when facing the Devil. These are the signs of a righteous fanatic rather than a person of faith. Such an attitude is as unacceptable for me as it is for God. May God have mercy on your soul for no one else will."

[neebob]

40. He'd probably tell some parable

and Bush would laugh and tell him to get a real job.

[Lou_C]

41. He would say...Begone Satan I banish you to the bowels of Hell

:evilgrin:

[Gregorian]

42. GET THEE BEHIND ME!

[opihimoimoi]

43. "For the Love of God, I said PEACE!!! NOT WAR!!!!!!!"""""

"Are you Humans Numb or What?"

[Morning Dew]

44. He'd say.......

"Hey W., my Dad was calling you to be penitent, not
President.

[TheWizardOfMudd]

45. I would answer but I don't want the prize

[Sapphocrat]

46. "Guess what, George? I'm gay." n/t

[TNDemo]

48. I nominate this one.

[Djinn]

47. Not a huge bible - head

and I guess this is more God than Jesus but I'm guessing it could involve the words:

"Smote thee"

[Stuckinthebush]

49. W would have locked him up back on 9/12

Jesus would be in Camp X-ray.

He couldn't say anything.