ok, I'll just be RUDE!

[gauguin57]

Reagan's state funeral is Saturday. Lots of government money being spent on it.

My question: Since George H.W. Bush is looking older and more infirm by the day, and since he's making a solo parachute jump on Saturday to celebrate his 80th birthday ... should they just leave everything in place in Washington (the seats, the bier in the Capital rotunda, the barricades, the horse-drawn caisson), just in case? O8)

A friend of mine theorizes: Dubya wants his Dad to kind of go splat on Saturday, but not get killed. He'll be on life support till he can be taken off as the October surprise.

I'm already going to hell because I dare question St. Dubya's Christian credentials and the Patriot Act. So don't even bother telling me I'm damned. I'm damned, and I'm proud!

[MichaelHarris]

1. don't fret

I've been on the short bus to hell for a while. Sit back and enjoy the ride. I knew my seat was secure when I suggested the "My Son went to Bagdad and all I got was this damned video T-shirt" Now that'll get ya an E-ticket to hell.

[SoCalDem]

2. He does not jump solo.. He gets "velcroed" to a real skydiver.

:)

[MichaelHarris]

3. what are the chances

the velcro was manufactured by a company that outsourced? One can only pray for sub-standard velcro.

[gauguin57]

11. not this time!

I read an AP story stating he is absolutely making a solo jump this time; "it will not be a tandem jump," his aide was quoted as saying.

[FemaleDemfromMass]

24. Or so you think

ROFL

p.s. Your line dance and song are hilarious. B-)

[Piperay]

4. Hehehehe...

guess I'm going to hell too cause this whole thread has me ROTFLMAO! :evilgrin:

[MichaelHarris]

5. step right up

get your e-ticket on the short bus to hell.

[calimary]

29. Me, too! But, hey, folks, I am NOT going to go to hell! Know why?

Because, in TRUE Catholic tradition, my dad once sent one of the local priests to Rome, all-expenses paid. The priest came back with a parchment proclamation from Pope John the 23rd (the COOL Pope, no less) that our family was to be granted a plenary indulgence at the hour of death. In traditional Catholic circles, that's a free pass to the express UP-elevator, I'll have you know! No stop-offs at purgatory. It's a ticket straight into Heaven - and no waiting in line. Thanks, dad!

Okay, I know it's just Catholic old-wives-tales. But I choose to believe it only because it brings a HUGE, cynically smile to my face. I remember, even as a kid, wondering if that meant I could do WHATEVER THE HELL I wanted, including murder people, and I'd still be able to collect on my "get out of jail free" card! (So I was a weird kid.) Some of my friends even mentioned that to me.

Hilarious, 'eh? Dear God, I LOVE that story! It's one of my all-time favorite family legends.

Not long ago, on a Catholic thread by Career Prole, I realized while posting that there's a GOOD reason why I refuse to leave the Catholic Church, much as I feel sometimes as though it's left me: How on earth could you possibly turn your back on an institution that generates so much MATERIAL?!?!?!??!

[MichaelHarris]

33. that cracked me up

express elevator up LOL thats a funny story. If I was Catholic I'd steal it.

[LearnedHand]

34. I'm definitely going straight to hell

...which is just fine with me, because, according to what they tell me, anyway, I won't be there with all the creepy-freeper christians.

[gauguin57]

36. I'll see your plenary indulgence ....

... and raise you an acceptance of Jesus as my personal Lord and savior in 1973!

I've got my own get-out-of-hell free card (though I started this evil thread). I became a born-again Christian in high school. I even witnessed to strangers for the LORD. Once you've said the little prayer, I was assured by my youth-group leaders at the time, you're IN, baby! Doesn't matter that I long ago turned my back on all that and became a ... what ... dead-again non-Christian?

I'll be ripped right outta my shoes when the rapture comes, so eat my dust, all you left-behinders! See you in paradise, plenary indulgence! (Cripes, all my years as a Catholic, and no plenary indulgence. I can say the Act of Contrition in 15 seconds or less and everything!!!).

Ah, now that I see what I've written ... I AM going to hell!!!! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

[MichaelHarris]

37. yeah but

I just saw Reagan's image in a flour tortilla. Thats gotta be worth something at the pearly gates.

[xchrom]

6. do i need sun block?

[MichaelHarris]

7. and a beach towel n/t

[DoYouEverWonder]

8. They should probaly put away most of the chairs

they certainly won't need them for Sr's funeral. And they probably would want to change the camera angles and avoid any long shots.

[MichaelHarris]

9. good point

after all after a sky diving "accident" all they really need for a coffin is a Folgers coffee can.

[Sporadicus]

10. A More Appropriate Brand of Coffee

Chock Full o'Nuts

[gauguin57]

12. and holy heck ...

have you seen Gerald Ford lately? He seems like he still has his marbles, but the guy is nearly 91, and looking pretty frail. Are we gonna have state funerals all year?

Quite frankly, I think Betty Ford is among the top few First Ladies who have really contributed something significant to society. Bringing substance abuse as a disease into the open; establishing the Betty Ford Center, telling her story to the country ... maybe SHE should be the one getting the state funeral when SHE passes.

[Vickers]

13. "Are we gonna have state funerals all year?" Aw man!

I know I shouldn't, but I'm LMAO!!!!!

[donhakman]

16. I'm like a War President enRon.

[calimary]

32. Take off the "Com" and leave the "mutator" - and you're correct.

[gauguin57]

17. LYAO!

Go ahead! You'll feel better. If we don't laugh, we'll just be crying from now till Jan. 20 (when I think we'll all be feeling a lot better!).

[rhino47]

21. We wont have state funerals all year Vickers

Just till the election to keep * misadmin`s lying dirty tricks out of the news.

[LearnedHand]

35. Yuk! Har-har-har!

n/t

[liberalitch]

23. Yea, terminal velocity...

one powerful force.

[calimary]

31. Or maybe a couple of sheets of blotter paper?

(sorry...)

[outinforce]

14. The State Funeral Is Not Saturday

It is Friday.

[gauguin57]

15. oops, I misspoke

you're correct ... it is Friday. I was thinking ahead a day to the big parachute jump.

[mockmonkey]

18. Is this to celebrate his

80th birthday or his solo parachute jump from WWII?

[KoKo]

20. What an Ego! He's trying to steal "death time" from Ronnie by doing a

stunt! The whole family is nuts. Show Off's and Nuts.

[BringEmOn]

28. Too bad that John Delaney and William White can't be here to join him.

The radioman and gunner Poppy bailed out on died in the crash.

[WI_DEM]

19. They probably should hold Ford and Bush I state funeral

at the same time as Reagan's and tell Jerry and Poppy that true to GOP principles--it will save tax payers millions and they will have the extra advantage of actually viewing their funerals.

[gauguin57]

22. WOW! what a great idea!

While they have all the big Repuglicans in the free world gathered in one spot, while they have the whole town already closed down, while the mail service is stopped ... it WOULD save taxpayers money.

Nah, Dubya would just use it as an exucse for another tax cut for the wealthy.

You know, of course, that if Poppy DOESN'T make it to the ground safely, I'll feel personally responsible (for having started this thread), and will be in therapy for years. I'm a liberal -- we take these things to heart. Uh ... we HAVE a heart to take things to.

[Lestat]

25. ROFL!

They should! Hahahahaha!

I'm already damned. I'm a vampire. :) I'll see you in hell! :evilgrin:

[gauguin57]

27. yeah, baby!

Hey, if people like Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell and John Asscroft and Dubya Bush are going to heaven, I'll happily apply 2,500 SPF sunscreen in hell!

[Canuckistanian]

26. The few, the damned, the proud...

Interesting theory. But what will the surprise be? Just the sympathy vote? Bush the Smarter was not exactly loved by all, not even conservatives.

[gauguin57]

30. senior-citizen 'fear factor'

Las Vegas Sun:

http://www.lasvegassun.com/sunbin/stories/nat-gen/2004/jun/09/060903337.html


Ex-President Bush Plans Birthday Skydive
By MICHAEL GRACZYK
ASSOCIATED PRESS

HOUSTON (AP) - In a sort of senior-citizen version of "Fear Factor," former President George H. W. Bush plans to celebrate his 80th birthday by jumping out of a plane Sunday at 13,000 feet.

"A scary feeling," Bush said in his usual pronoun-free style as he contemplated standing in the open door of the plane with a parachute on. "A funny feeling in your tummy or your knees."

Bush has made four parachute jumps in his life - three since leaving the White House more than a decade ago, including one on his 75th birthday.

"People say: `Why are you doing this, you nutty old man?'" Bush said. "I say: One, because I want to. It feels good. There's a thrill involved. And two: Just because you're 80 doesn't mean you're finished. It sends a message to a lot of people ... that old age is not a barrier."

This jump will be much different from the first time Bush bailed out of a plane. That was in 1944, when the 20-year-old Navy pilot was shot down over the Pacific.

Bush, who talked to The Associated Press last month about the skydive, decided to go ahead with the jump despite the death of President Reagan.