Latest News Obfuscation Script ...... Martha Stewart - Arch Criminal

[Stinky The Clown]

So today I'm in the car doing the ususal Sunday afternoon runnin' around crap. DC's all news WTOP is playin' the "Political Top 40(tm)" (formerly known as 'the news"). Gunna rain ..... blah blah blah ..... the Mixing Bowl has a 200 mile back-up ...... blah blah blah ....... The Nats ..... blah blah blah ....... today, housing kummishinner ...... blah blah fucking blah .......

..... and then this liddle gem .......

(breathless male newsreaderbot): "Did Martha Stewart break the terms of her federal felony parole?

So I'm thinkin' .... oh shit, now what? DeLay's gotta have done sumthin' .... or Frist ..... maybe Prancin' Preznit Precious got caught gettin' back-doored by Condi while she was wearin' a leather harness anna strap-on ......

(breathless male newsreaderbot)(continuing): "The latest after these messages."

I suffer through the nonesense that is the latest Don Beyer Volvo commercial, the latest American Service Center Mercedes commercial, and the latest Capitol Cadillac/Hummer commercial (notice there's no Chevvy ads?)

(breathless male newsreaderbot)(returning):"Martha Stewart may have broken the terms of her parole following her prison term for her federal conviction ....... " (Notice how this fuckwad has worked the words 'federal' 'parole' 'conviction' into not only a headline, but the tease, the second headline, and now the story. Man-o-man that Martha's is one badass criminnil, ain't she?)

Well, it seems that what happened is Martha attended an award ceremony for the 100 most influential Americans. It seems, further, she was one of the people getting the fucking award. ***AND*** ...... tada ..... she spoke to the probation department and GOT THEIR FUCKING PERMISSION.

So where's the story here? Well, it seems some higherup kommisar in the ol' probation ministry sez it may not have been 'work-related' and that hiz office's gunna 'vestigate an' shit ........

MESSAGE TO THE MEDIA:

Hey assholes ... there's some REAL GODDAM FUCKING NEWS OUT THERE YOU SORRY MOTHERFUCKING ASSHATS

i ..... cannot ..... take ...... this ...... shit ..... much ..... longer ...........:banghead:

[oblivious]

1. Unbelievable.

They read the "Grab em in the headline" chapter of "Reporting for Idiots" but forgot to read the chapter on "Honesty and ethics".

It's like some sort of bad dream.

[ngGale]

2. They are all pathological liars...n/t

[Stinky The Clown]

3. Not pathological ...... 'whorological' ... and I'm not referring to clocks

There is no doubt in my mind whatever that this is all orchestrated by those who would have this country ripped asunder. Does that sound like tin foil hat territory? Maybe. But how else to explain the mass 'losing of their senses' the media exhibit?