Have you or do you spank/hit your children?

[trumad]

I never have spanked my children, ages 11,10,8 and they seem to be turning out pretty good.

Although... I do a good Rock eye lift and that pretty much does the trick.

[trotsky]

1. Please, no, let's not start another thread on this.

It can't end with anything but a fight and a lock.

[trumad]

10. Can't learn unless you debate...

[trotsky]

28. There's never any learning that goes on in these.

Based on your comment - that "learning" should occur - I'm guessing you intended this to be flamebait. Enjoy.

[Boredtodeath]

2. No, I don't spank

There's something illogical about the following scenario:

Don't (thwack)

hit (thwack)

your (thwack)

sister (thwack)

[ptolle]

23. spanking

I tend to think in terms of the opening lyrics to Jesse Winchester's song Do La Lay:
Baby do la lay my child
One and one made you
So right away we make you cry
To show you who is who.
The other one I've really always liked is (thwack-now we/I'll really give you something to cry about)

[sabra]

3. this could get interesting...

I have a 2 1/2 year old son, and 2 1/2 week old daughter, and don't plan on going the spanking route...

[Coventina]

4. flame war in 3.....2......1.......

:hide:

:nuke:

[William Bloode]

16. Hahahahahaha!

I was just gonna post that this is pure flame bait.

[Stinky The Clown]

5. .

:popcorn:

[Just Me]

6. ew

:popcorn:

[redqueen]

7. No I do not spank.

Obedience schools teach people not to hit their dogs, even. Why would anyone think hitting a child is reasonable?

[Geek_Girl]

8. I'm not against Spanking but I haven't spanked my child

She's 21/2 and I found better ways to discipline her. Everyone tells me how well behaved she is so I guess I'm doing ok.

[katinmn]

9. No. My brothers and I weren't hit by my parents either

[trumad]

11. My Dad used the belt on me

and after he whooped me I'd go back out and get in trouble again. Now if he took my GI Joes away I might have thought twice about screwing up.

[insane_cratic_gal]

12. Nope but i'd spank

"the rock"

lol couldn't resist

[teenagebambam]

13. Back in the day

they used to make those little paddle-ball things out of 3/4 inch plywood. My mother had a red one which she kept on top of the refigerator (sans rubber ball of course). All she had to do was LOOK like she was reaching for the red paddle, and everyone would straighten up. I don't think she ever had to REALLY use it.

[katinmn]

19. They used to spank us in school for everything from bad behavior

to bad test scores.

My parents blew their tops over that.

One teacher dug her fingernails into my brother's head so hard that he had scabs for weeks. I think he was chewing gum or something and then said something smart mouthed. He was in 4th grade.

I was always bad in math and in 5th or 6th grade had to stand in front of the class and be paddled for each wrong answer a couple times. It was humiliating.

I think it's why I despise abuse of power and why I will fight to the death for an underdog.

I have a hard time trusting anyone in power. They tend to abuse it.

[XemaSab]

33. Oh MAN

If I'd been spanked for wrong answers in math, I STILL wouldn't be able to sit down.

[katinmn]

34. Ha! Now I am re-learning math with my daughter

she's in 7th grade.

I am amazed at all the good sites there are on the Internets now. Get lots of help online.

[SaveElmer]

14. I did once...and felt horrible afterwards...

Vowed never to do it again. When my son does something I don't approve of I find that really letting him know how sad and disappointed his action made me will always do the trick.

[Protagoras]

15. No but I often wish to spank OTHER PEOPLE'S

Usually in the supermarket when the little undisciplined feral critters are pulling bottles of pickles off the shelves to break on the floor while the parents plead weakly "Timmy stoooooop that.....stooooop it Timmy or I won't buy you that toy....stooop it *crash*...Timmy...come over here Timmy *crash*...I said get over here (then they finally stop talking on their cell phone and wrangle the kid).

Ok nevermind...I don't want to spank the children. I want to beat the parents.

[LeftyMom]

17. nope

I'm small, and men in my family run tall. If I keep LK in line through fear, I'll lose my default disciplinary option before his teens, because he'll tower over me by then.

I have the Mom voice down to a science. I can just say the little bugger's name in a tone that says "Sit down and shut up, for you are about to be in deep shit, little boy."

He's getting pretty good at noticing when he's wound up or out of sorts, he'll tell me "go to bed" and go to lie down on his bed for a few minutes so he can get calmed down a bit.

[gollygee]

18. No and I won't

:popcorn:

[ultraist]

20. No, never have, never will

Don't need to. My 11 and 13 year old are both well behaved. We use civilized, nonviolent parenting techniques.

[PurityOfEssence]

21. Nope.

I was spanked and I was belted by both mom and dad. Aw hell, I was trouble, I'll admit that, but the lingering images aren't good. My spouse was hit too, and once--that I know of--swatted our first-born on the sole of the foot to stop a tantrum; we had a serious discussion about that. There is no hitting in this house. The shortniks are 8 and 5 now, and I've been sorely tempted with the littler of the two on many times, but we will NEVER hit them. When hit by them--which is EXTREMELY rare--it is a good opportunity to remind them of the physical reality.

If others want to hit in a chiding way, I don't like it, but I'm not going to be a perfectionist and dismiss them as savages. If others want to hit to hurt, I'll get in their faces.

Revenge for one's upbringing is the cause of much of this, and basic human primitiveness explains the rest.

Mom's long since dead now, but dad and I have addressed the issue and there are no hard feelings. The only unresolved issues seem to be from him for having resorted to that at times. Those times, lest we forget, were not regular, and the threat of retaliation didn't hang over the household like a pall. Still, the one laboring with residual issues is him. It's all good; he knows I understand, and it's not a topic of conversation. We grow. We learn.

Children have boundless energy and can out-turn you, confound you and send you into a primitive state faster than anything. Boundaries are hard to set with those who don't understand the give-and-take of society's covenant, but the reward is great: if inculcated with concepts of interdependence, they have the tools to be much better critters. (Unfortunately, they can also outdebate you and get their way much better due to our methodology...)

[Pithlet]

22. Taking away priviledges

Seems to be the thing that works best, especially now that my older one is pre-school aged. Combined with focusing and praising good behavior, it is very effective.

[Sweet Freedom]

24. No, never

...and I wasn't spanked, and neither was my mother.

[Misunderestimator]

25. You're a good dad, tru...

but I already knew that...

[MuseRider]

26. Only once

and that was when he ran out into traffic and it just sort of happened. A quick grab and a swat on the butt. It made me feel terrible, he did not even feel it through his diapers.

Both of my boys are wonderful, never any real trouble and they are good citizens. As an abused child I knew I could never even consider spanking, I was worried what might happen if I did and I knew it was not the answer.

[Madrone]

27. I was beaten regularly.

Because of it, I've considered this subject long and hard since I was a child. My conclusion is NO HITTING. Ever. It's whack. No pun intended.

No I don't have children. No, my opinion isn't less valid because of it.

[Divameow77]

29. What is considered actually spanking?

I have "swatted" my son on the bum with no reaction. I have found nothing works like taking the game boy away.
I was spanked as a child and I don't feel bad about it, I just don't think it's as effective.

[lukasahero]

30. I don't have kids but my dad spanked me - once - it was enough

I knew from then on what could possibly come from misbehaving. Never happened again and all I ever needed after that was "the look".

In fact, in later years my friends used to behave because they were afraid of getting "the talk". These were high school and college kids. They've told me getting beaten by their own parents didn't make them feel as bad as disappointing my dad.

[OnionPatch]

31. Yes and no

Before I had a child, I always righteously vowed to never spank, but my daughter, who is four now, presented me with several situations of outright defiance, one that could have gotten her killed; running out toward the road and not stopping when I called her.

There was another occasion where I tried time-outs, etc. and she would simply not take her time-out, just got up, stuck her tongue out and started playing.

On both occasions (about a year ago) I gave her a quick swat on the butt and no, I'm not sorry about it. It was effective. She now knows that if she pushes too far, it's not entirely out of the question. Since those incidents, she is much better behaved and I have never felt the need to resort to spanking since.

Sorry, flame away.

[paparush]

32. My son just turned 10

and we've never spanked him...and never will.

My wife and I both were spanked (code word for beaten) as children and vowed NOT to pass on this form of punishment.

We TALK to our son. We discuss consequences. Our boy WANTS limits.

I really do love being a parent.