The Vogon Poetry Thread (AKA: Bad poetry to stupid things)

[politicat]

Ode to the Ugly Dismantled Car That Sits in my Neighbor's Driveway

Oh little car, that traveled far
and broke at every turn
When shall I look at you upon a hook
of the truck that takes you away?

Oh little junk, what's in your trunk
that the people keep you here?
Why can't they peek at your grody leak
and send you far away?


Politicat

If you didn't already know, the Vogons are from Douglas Adams's The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and are known for awful, truly sickening poetry. And for demolishing earth to make a bypass.

[Canuckistanian]

1. Well. I thought it was rather good.

[Canuckistanian]

2. Here's my own

See, see the slumping sky
Marvel at its big plaid depths.
Tell me, politicat do you
Wonder why the naked mole rat ignores you?
Why its foobly stare
makes you feel dehydrated.
I can tell you, it is
Worried by your flortz facial growth
That looks like
A baking soda.
What's more, it knows
Your masticate potting shed
Smells of lima bean.
Everything under the big slumping sky
Asks why, why do you even bother?
You only charm herrings.

From Here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/vogonpoetry/lettergen.shtml

[politicat]

3. That would make even a Vogon howl!

Thanks!

[Vogon_Glory]

4. I Feel Obliged To Add To The Thread

Brown Palmetto bug upon my floor
You scuttled through some open door
To--bleep--and scuttle across my kitchen tiles
So why is it despite my whiles
And despite the fact I wish you ill
You prove so--bleep--hard to kill
The lunge, the slap, the downturned glass
The improve flail
All meant to squish you flat or
Flush you down the disposal
All Fail
As all these measures you counter
As you scurry under my kitchen counter?