The Great American Earworm Deathmatch- Wat Tyler vs. Eyesroll

[Beware the Beast Man]

Who will be the last person standing?

[kick-ass-bob]

1. Wat. He is unrelenting.

[eyesroll]

2. Shall I fire the opening salvo?

This bed is on fire
With passionate love
The neighbours complain about the noises above
But she only comes when she?s on top

My therapist said not to see you no more
She said you?re like a disease without any cure
She said I?m so obsessed that I?m becoming a bore, oh no
Ah, you think you?re so pretty

Caught your hand inside the till
Slammed your fingers in the door
Fought with kitchen knives and skewers
Dressed me up in womens clothes
Messed around with gender roles
Dye my eyes and call me pretty

Moved out of the house, so you moved next door
I locked you out, you cut a hole in the wall
I found you sleeping next to me, I thought I was alone
You?re driving me crazy, when are you coming home

[Wat_Tyler]

4. Piffle.

Welcome to your life
There’s no turning back
Even while we sleep
We will find you
Acting on your best behaviour
Turn your back on mother nature
Everybody wants to rule the world

It’s my own design
It’s my own remorse
Help me to decide
Help me make the most
Of freedom and of pleasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
Everybody wants to rule the world

There’s a room where the light won’t find you
Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down
When they do I’ll be right behind you

So glad we’ve almost made it
So sad they had to fade it
Everybody wants to rule the world

I can’t stand this indecision
Married with a lack of vision
Everybody wants to rule the world
Say that you’ll never never never never need it
One headline why believe it ?
Everybody wants to rule the world

All for freedom and for pleasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
Everybody wants to rule the world

[eyesroll]

6. I remember all my life

Raining down as cold as ice
A shadow of a man
A face through a window
Crying in the night
The night goes into

Morning, just another day
Happy people pass my way
Looking in their eyes
I see a memory
I never realized
you made me so happy, oh Mandy

Well you came and you gave without taking
but I sent you away, oh Mandy
well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking
I need you today, oh Mandy

I'm standing on the edge of time
I Walked away when love was mine
Caught up in a world of uphill climbing
The tears are in my mind
And nothing is rhyming, oh Mandy

Well you came and you gave without taking
but I sent you away, oh Mandy
well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking
And I need you today, oh Mandy

Yesterday's a dream I face the morning
Crying on the breeze
the pain is calling, oh Mandy

Well you came and you gave without taking
but I sent you away, oh Mandy
well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking
And I need you today, oh Mandy

[Wat_Tyler]

8. Ha!

Out on the wiley, windy moors
We'd roll and fall in green.
You had a temper like my jealousy:
Too hot, too greedy.
How could you leave me,
When I needed to possess you?
I hated you. I loved you, too.

Bad dreams in the night.
You told me I was going to lose the fight,
Leave behind my wuthering, wuthering
Wuthering Heights.

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I´m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window.

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I´m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window.

Ooh, it gets dark! It gets lonely,
On the other side from you.
I pine a lot. I find a lot
Falls through without you.
I'm coming back, love.
Cruel Heathcliff, my one dream,
My only master.

Too long I roam in the night.
I'm coming back to his side, to put it right.
I'm coming home to wuthering, wuthering,
Wuthering Heights,

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I´m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window.

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I´m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window.

Ooh! Let me have it.
Let me grab your soul away.
Ooh! Let me have it.
Let me grab your soul away.
You know it's me--Cathy!

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I'm so cold!
Let me in-a-your window.

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I´m so cold!
Let me in-a-your window.

Heathcliff, it's me-- I'm Cathy.
I've come home. I´m so cold!

Heathcliff, it's me--I'm Cathy
I've come home. I'm so cold!

AHHHHHHH YAAAAA YAAAA OHHHH YAAAAAAA

[eyesroll]

9. Hm.

I am the very model of a modern Major-General,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.


ALL:
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.


GENERAL:
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus;
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
ALL:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
He is the very model of a modern Major-General.
GENERAL:
I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's;
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous;
I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,
I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes!
Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.

ALL:
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.

GENERAL:
Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform,
And tell you ev'ry detail of Caractacus's uniform:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
ALL:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
He is the very model of a modern Major-General.


GENERAL:
In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery--
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.



ALL:
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.

GENERAL:
For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
ALL:
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
He is the very model of a modern Major-General.

[kick-ass-bob]

10. May I interrupt:

Yesterday, There was so many things
I was never told
Now that I'm startin' to learn
I feel I'm growing old

'Cause yesterday's got nothin' for me
Old pictures that I'll always see
Some things could be better
In my book of memories
Prayers in my pocket
And no hand in destiny
I'll keep on movin' along
With no time to plant my feet

'Cause yesterday's got nothin' for me
Old pictures that I'll always see
Some things could be better
If we'd all just let them be

Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Got nothin' for me

Yesterday, There was so many things
I was never shown
Suddenly this time I found
I'm on the streets and I'm all alone

Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Old pictures that I'll always see
I ain't got time to reminisce old novelties

Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday's got nothin' for me
Yesterday

Yesterday

[Wat_Tyler]

11. You asked for it.

There’s a new game
We like to play you see
A game with added reality
You treat me like a dog
Get me down on my knees

We call it master and servant
We call it master and servant

It’s a lot like life
This play between the sheets
With you on top and me underneath
Forget all about equality

Let’s play master and servant
Let’s play master and servant

It’s a lot like life
And that’s what’s appealing
If you despise that throwaway feeling
From disposable fun
Then this is the one

Domination’s the name of the game
In bed or in life
They’re both just the same
Except in one you’re fulfilled
At the end of the day

Let’s play master and servant
Let’s play master and servant

Let’s play master and servant
Come on, master and servant

[eyesroll]

12. Look at what's happened to me!

I can't believe it myself.
Suddenly I'm up on top of the world,
It should've been somebody else.

Believe it or not,
I'm walking on air.
I never thought I could feel so free eee eee.
Flying away on a wing and a prayer.
Who could it be?
Believe it or not it's just me.

It's like a light of a new day,
It came from out of the blue.
Breaking me out of the spell I was in,
Making all of my wishes come true ue ue.

Believe it or not,
I'm walking on air.
I never thought I could feel so free eee eee.
Flying away on a wing and a prayer.
Who could it be?
Believe it or not it's just me.

[Wat_Tyler]

13. Heavy Artillery

The winds are blowing every morning
just to do your hair now
cause she cares you all
her day oh wouldn't be right
without her make up
she's never had a make up
she's just like you and me
but she's homeless, she's homeless
as she stands there singing for money.

In my sleep I see her begging
reaching police
although her body is not mine
I ask now I do (now I do)
she's just like you and me
but she's homeless, she's homeless
as she stands there singing for money.

[Beware the Beast Man]

15. It's a run-in! Beastman's swinging a steel chair!

Istanbul was Constantinople
Now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople
Been a long time gone, Constantinople
Now it's Turkish delight on a moonlit night

Every gal in Constantinople
Lives in Istanbul, not Constantinople
So if you've a date in Constantinople
She'll be waiting in Istanbul

Even old New York was once New Amsterdam
Why they changed it I can't say
People just liked it better that way

So take me back to Constantinople
No, you can't go back to Constantinople
Been a long time gone, Constantinople
Why did Constantinople get the works
That's nobody's business but the Turks

Istanbul (Istanbul)
Istanbul (Istanbul)

Even old New York was once New Amsterdam
Why they changed it I can't say
People just liked it better that way

Istanbul was Constantinople
Now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople
Been a long time gone, Constantinople
Why did Constantinople get the works
That's nobody's business but the Turks

So take me back to Constantinople
No, you can't go back to Constantinople
Been a long time gone, Constantinople
Why did Constantinople get the works
That's nobody's business but the Turks

[Wat_Tyler]

Nu-uh!

You burden me with your questions
You'd have me tell no lies
You're always asking what it's all about
Now listen to my replies
You say to me I don't talk enough
But when I do I'm a fool
These times I've spent, I've realized
I'm going to shoot through
And leave you

The things, you say
Your purple prose just gives you away
The things, you say
You're unbelievable
You burden me with your problems
By telling me more than mine
I'm always so concerned
With the way you say,
You've always go to stop
To think of us being one
Is more than I ever know
But this time, I realize
I'm going to shoot through
And leave you

Seemingly lastless, don't mean
you can ask us
Pushing down the relative
Bringing out your higher self
Think of the fine times, pushing
down the better few, instead of
bringing out the clues, to what the
world and everything anger to, brace
yourself with the grace of ease,
I know this world ain't what it seems.
What the fuck was that,
its unbelievable

[kick-ass-bob]

18. I'll bust you all:

I'm a little teapot short and stout,

Here is my handle, here is my spout,

When I get all steamed up hear me shout,

Tip me over and pour me out.

[eyesroll]

19. Not to put too fine a point on it...

And I'm gonna leave it at that, Beastman. That's all you need from that one.

[Wat_Tyler]

21. Mmm?

Dark in the city, night is a wire
Steam in the subway, earth is a fire
Do-do do do, do do do, do do do, do do do, do do
Woman you want me, give me a sign
And catch my breathing even closer behind
Do-do do do, do do do, do do do, do do do, do do

In touch with the ground
I’m on the hunt I’m after you
Smell like I sound, I’m lost in a crowd
And I’m hungry like the wolf
Straddle the line, in discord and rhyme
I’m on the hunt I’m after you
Mouth is alive with juices like wine
And I’m hungry like the wolf

Stalked in the forest, too close to hide
I’ll be upon you by the moonlight side
Do-do do do, do do do, do do do, do do do, do do
High blood drumming ony our skin it’s so tight
You feel my heart, I’m just a moment behind
Do-do do do, do do do, do do do, do do do, do do

In touch with the ground
I’m on the hunt I’m after you
Scent and a sound, I’m lost and I’m found
And I’m hungry like the wolf
Strut on a line, it’s discord and rhyme
I howl and I whine I’m after you
Mouth is alive all running inside
And I’m hungry like the wolf

-

(hungry like the wolf
Hungry like the wolf
Hungry like the wolf)

Burning the ground I break from the crowd
I’m on the hunt I’m after you
I smell like I sound, I’m lost and I’m found
And I’m hungry like the wolf
Strut on a line, it’s discord and rhyme
I’m on the hunt I’m after you
Mouth is alive with juices like wine
And I’m hungry like the wolf

Burning the ground I break from the crowd
I’m on the hunt I’m after you
Scent and a sound, I’m lost and I’m found
And I’m hungry like the wolf

Strut on a line, it’s discord and rhyme
I howl and I whine I’m after you
Mouth is alive all running inside
And I’m hungry like the wolf...

[eyesroll]

25. Come on, everyone...harmonize!

I'd like to build the world a home
And furnish it with love
Grow apple trees and honey bees and snow-white turtle doves
I'd like to teach the world to sing
In perfect harmony
I'd like to hold it in my arms and keep it company
I'd like to see the world for once
All standing hand in hand
And hear them echo through the hills "Ah, peace throughout the land"
(That's the song I hear)
I'd like to teach the world to sing (that the world sings today)
In perfect harmony
(Lead singer and background singers singing simultaneously)
I'd like to teach the world to sing
In perfect harmony
Id like to build the world a home
And furnish it with love
Grow apple trees and honey bees and snow-white turtle doves

[Wat_Tyler]

28. You can't hurry, love.

I need love, love
To ease my mind
I need to find, find someone to call mine
But mama said

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
She said love don’t come easy
It’s a game of give and take

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
You got to trust, give it time
No matter how long it takes

But how many heartaches
Must I stand before I find a love
To let me live again
Right now the only thing
That keeps me hangin’ on
When I feel my strength, yeah
It’s almost gone
I remember mama said:

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
She said love don’t come easy
It’s a game of give and take

How long must I wait
How much more can I take
Before loneliness will cause my heart
Heart to break?

No I can’t bear to live my life alone
I grow impatient for a love to call my own
But when I feel that i, I can’t go on
These precious words keeps me hangin’ on
I remember mama said:

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
She said love don’t come easy
It’s a game of give and take

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
She said trust, give it time
No matter how long it takes

No, love, love, don’t come easy
But I keep on waiting
Anticipating for that soft voice
To talk to me at night
For some tender arms
To hold me tight
I keep waiting
I keep on waiting
But it ain’t easy
It ain’t easy
But mama said:

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
She said to trust, give it time
No matter how long it takes

You can’t hurry love
No, you just have to wait
She said love don’t come easy
It’s a game of give and take

[Phillycat]

51. Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet!

[eyesroll]

17. La da dee, la dee da.

We're going to dance,
We're going to dance,
We're going to dance
And have some fun

The chills that you
Spill up my back
Keep me filled with
Satisfaction when we're done
Satisfaction of what's to come
(I) I couldn't ask for another
(I-I-I-I-I I)
No I couldn't ask for another
Your groove I do deeply dig
No walls only the bridge
My supperdish, my succotash wish
(Sing it baby)
(I) I couldn't ask for another
(Uh-huh uh-huh)
(I-I-I-I-I I)
No I couldn't ask for another

Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah-ah
Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah-ah
Groove is in the heart
Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah

The depth the hula groove
Move us to the nth hoop
We goin' through to Horten
Hears a who-ooh
(I) I couldn't ask for another
(I-I-I-I-I I)
No couldn't ask for another
DJ Soul (soul) was on a roll
I've been told he can't be sold
He's not vicious or malicious
Just de-lovely and delicious
(I) I couldn't ask for another

(Sing it)

Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah-ah
(Ne-na-na-na-na)
Groove is in the heart
(Ne-na-na-na-na)
Groove is in the heart
(Ne-na-na-na-na)
Groove is in the heart-ah-ah-ah

Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah-ah (yeah)
Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah
Groove is in the heart
Groove is in the heart
Ah-ah-ah

[Wat_Tyler]

20. OK.

Wir fahr'n fahr'n fahr'n auf der Autobahn
fahr'n fahr'n fahr'n auf der Autobahn

Wir fahr'n fahr'n fahr'n auf der Autobahn
fahr'n fahr'n fahr'n auf der Autobahn

Wir fahr'n fahr'n fahr'n auf der Autobahn
fahr'n fahr'n fahr'n auf der Autobahn

(repeat until sun burns out)

[eyesroll]

23. Tell me you want to touch me.

Tell you what?
Oh, yeah
Oh, show me that monkey you got there
(Ah, here?)
Hey, what's the monkey?
This is the monkey, baby
Say hi
Say hi to the monkey, the monkey likes you
Will it bite?
Yeah
Y, No, he doesn't bite as long as you're nice to him
No
No he won't bite you, nah
I want you to pet the monkey now
(Pet?) Does it like that?
Yeah ha ha
(Like, right like, oh, right there?)
Yeah
Oh, oh yeah
Uh huh
Oh wow, this is great
I have something else I want you to do for me
Whip me, teenage babe (x4)
Let me be your mortal slave and whip me
Teenage babe
Oh (x2)
Ah
(Yeah, come here, you little shit)
I been, I been, I been
I been so bad
I, I been so bad
I, I been so bad I,I want you to put me on the wheel
I want you to put me on the wheel
Uh, no, uh, put me on the wheel
Uh, oh, oh yeah, all right tie, yeah
Tie me up
All right, all right
Yeah
All right
Now spank me
Mm
Spank me
Like that?
Yeah
Like that?
A little harder
Uh
Harder
Uh
Oh, I been so bad
All right (x2)
(Look at that flesh fly)
(My god)
I want you to s
Spin the wheel
Spin it now
Ready?
Spin it, yes, I'm ready
(Around like this?)
(x2) Yes
Faster? (x2)
Spin it now
(Faster, faster, faster, faster, faster)
Oh (x2)
You wanna, Julie, you wanna get on the wheel, I'm jumpin' on, here I go
Oh, whe
Go, hu, look at all that hair fly
Faster, yeah
No
It's so good
Stop it
Stop it, I'm gonna
He's swinging on my pubicles
I'm gonna puke
Stop, I'm gonna
Here, I'll save you
I don't care, I'm dizzy
A hahaha
I'm too dizzy, Stop
Oh, good
Stop, I'm gonna puke
No
Oh
Oh my god
Oh, oh oh
Whip me, teenage babe (x4)
Let me be your mortal slave and whip me
Teenage babe
Hahahahhaha
Oh, yeah
Oh, man
Oh, oh I wanna
Uh, I wanna see Snakey
I wanna see Snakey
Where's Snakey?
Snakey?
Yeah, let me see Snakey
Sure you want Snakey?
I'm sure I want Snakey
Oh son, I don't think you want Snakey
I want
(Yes, he does)
I want Snakey, please
You don't want Snakey
I want Snakey
(Come on, give him Snakey)
Gimme Snakey right now
All right
Let me see him
All right, son
Here comes Snakey
Come on, Snakey
Snakey
Snakey's here
Oh yeah
Boy, boy, boy, boy
Whip me, teenage babe (x4)
Let me be your mortal slave and whip me
Teenage babe
Oh, oh, I think
I think
I think I'm
I think I'm gonna come
Oh (x2)
I'm gonna come
(Uh) (x4)
Suck it up (x2)
(Uh) (x4)
I'm gonna
(Uh) (x4)
Oh, man
It was so good
Did I give you a blinkey?
Could you hold me now?
Oh yeah
Just
Just hold me

[Wat_Tyler]

26. Raise you this.

Ah
If there’s a cure for this
I don’t want it
Don’t want it
If there’s a remedy
I’ll run from it
From it

Think about it all the time
Never let it out of my mind
’cause I love you

I’ve got the sweetest hangover
I don’t wanna get over
Sweetest hangover

Yeah, I don’t wanna get over
I don’t wanna get
I don’t wanna get...over

Ooh, I don’t need no cure
I don’t need no cure
I don’t need no cure

Sweet lovin’
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet love
Sweet, sweet love
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet love

Don’t call a doctor
Don’t call her momma
Don’t call her preacher

No, I don’t need it
I don’t want it

Sweet love, I love you
Sweet love, need love

If there’s a cure for this
I don’t want it
I don’t want it no
If there’s a cure for this
I don’t need it
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet love
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet love
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet love
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet love

[eyesroll]

27. I should have known, Wat.

I should have known you'd bid me farewell
There's a lesson to be learned from this and I've learned it very well
Now I know you're not the only starfish in the sea
If I never hear your name again, it's all the same to me
And I think it's gonna be all right
Yeah, the worst is over now
The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball
You never care for secrets I confide
To you, I'm just an ornament, something for your pride
Always running, never caring, that's the life you live
Stolen minutes of your time were all you had to give
And I think it's gonna be all right
Yeah, the worst is over now
The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball
The story's in the past with nothing to recall
I've got my life to live, and I don't need you at all
The roller coaster ride we took is nearly at an end
I bought my tickets with my tears, that's all I'm gonna spend
And I think it's gonna be all right
Yeah, the worst is over now
The morning sun is shining like a red rubber ball

[Wat_Tyler]

29. I should thank you almost.

No one could kill it off until you bled it
But I got rid of that ghost
’though certain habits remain imbedded
With the shadow of a doubt
But baby it was you who fed it
And I don’t know what else to say
But I think you get it.

I should’ve known
It was coming down to this
I should’ve known
You would betray me but without the kiss
I should’ve known
The kind of set-up it is.

And always isn’t always
When it’s not your photograph that I’ve been keeping
But you still live in those days
When I’d stay awake just to watch you sleeping
You delivered that blow
But it left a mark on me that you’re not seeing
And I don’t know what else you hear
But it’s not me weeping

I should’ve known
It was coming down to this
I should’ve known
You would betray me but without the kiss
I should’ve known
The kind of set-up it is.

I should’ve seen the cracks in the ceiling
And the mirror covered up with dust
But I was busy talking on the phone
I should’ve seen the obstacles but I said,
This house was built for us
Hello
Is anybody home?

I should’ve known
The minute that we hit the wall
I should’ve known
The writing was upon the stall
I should’ve known
’cause rome was starting to fall

And I should thank you, almost.

[eyesroll]

31. wimp.

kinda like a cloud i was up way up in the sky.
and i was feeling some feelings you wouldn't believe.
sometimes i don't believe them myself and i decided i was never coming down.

just then a tiny little dot caught my eye.
it was just about too small to see.
but i watched it way too long.
that dot was pulling me down.


i was up above it.
i was up above it.
i was up above it.
i was up above it.
now i'm down in it

shut up.
so what what does it matter now.
i was swimming in the hate now i crawl on the ground.
and everything i never liked about you is kind of seeping into me.
i try to laugh about it now but isn't it funny how everything works out.
i guess the jokes on me.



i used to be so big and strong.
i used to know my right from wrong.
i used to never be afraid.
i used to be somebody.

i used to have something inside.
now just this hole it's open wide.
used to want it all.
i used to be somebody.

i'll cross my heart and hope to die.
but the needle's already in my eye.
and all the world's weight is on my back and i don't even know why.
and what i used to think was me is just a fading memory.
i looked him right in the eye and said "goodbye."



rain rain go away.
come again some other day.



na na na na na na na na.

[Wat_Tyler]

32. Oh, that's it. Gloves off.

Easy lover
She'll get a hold on you believe it
Like no other
Before you know it you’ll be on your knees
She's an easy lover
She'll take your heart but you won’t feel it
She's like no other
And I'm just trying to make you see

She's the kind of girl you dream of
Dream of keeping hold of
You'd better forget it
You'll never get it
She will play around and leave you
Leave you and deceive you
Better forget it
Oh you'll regret it

No you'll never change her, so leave it, leave it
Get out quick cos seeing is believing
It's the only way
You'll ever know

Easy lover
She'll get a hold on you believe it
Like no other
Before you know it you'll be on your knees
She's an easy lover
She'll take your heart but you won’t feel it
She's like no other
And I'm just trying to make you see

You're the one that wants to hold her
Hold her and control her
You'd better forget it
You'll never get it
For she'll say there’s no other
Till she finds another
Better forget it
Oh you'll regret it

And don't try to change her, just leave it, leave it
You're not the only one, ooh seeing is believing
It's the only way
You'll ever know, oh

No don't try to change her, just leave it, leave it
You're not the only one, ooh seeing is believing
It's the only way
You'll ever know, oh

She's an easy lover (she’s a easy lover)
She'll get a hold on you believe it (get a hold on you)
(she's) like no other
Before you know it you’ll be on your knees (you’ll be down on
your knees)
She's an easy lover
She'll take your heart but you won’t feel it (you won’t feel it)
She's like no other
And I'm just trying to make you see (trying to make you see)

[eyesroll]

34. May I have your attention please?

May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here..

Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door
and started whoopin her ass worse than before
they first were divorce, throwin her over furniture (Ahh!)
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,
he didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Dr. Dre said... nothing you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
Feminist women love Eminem
<*vocal turntable: chigga chigga chigga*>
"Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walkin around grabbin his you-know-what
Flippin the you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse, than what's goin on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel don't they?
"We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us cannibals
who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
<*EWWW!*> But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes



I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?


Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell his records;
well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can, sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
so I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
and hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
You little bitch, put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee!"
I should download her audio on MP3
and show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
so I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me
who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
and just might be the next best thing but not quite me!




I'm like a head trip to listen to, cause I'm only givin you
things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it
in front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
and whether you like to admit it <*ERR*> I just shit it
better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums
It's funny; cause at the rate I'm goin when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the nursin home flirting
Pinchin nurses asses when I'm jackin off with Jergens
And I'm jerkin but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurkin
He could be workin at Burger King, spittin on your onion rings
<*HACH*> Or in the parkin lot, circling
Screaming "I don't give a fuck!"
with his windows down and his system up
So, will the real Shady please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?




Ha ha
Guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
Fuck it, let's all stand up

[Wat_Tyler]

36. Close your eyes, give me your hand, darling

Do you feel my heart beating
Do you understand
Do you feel the same
Am I only dreaming
Is this burning an eternal flame

I believe it's meant to be, darling
I watch you when you are sleeping
You belong with me
Do you feel the same
Am I only dreaming
Or is this burning an eternal flame

Say my name, sun shines through the rain
A whole life so lonely
And then you come and ease the pain
I don't want to lose this feeling

[eyesroll]

39. Ever been to Thailand?

Bangkok, Oriental setting
And the city don't know that the city is getting
The creme de la creme of the chess world in a
Show with everything but Yul Brynner

Time flies - doesn't seem a minute
Since the Tirolean spa had the chess boys in it
All change - don't you know that when you
Play at this level there's no ordinary venue

It's Iceland... or the Philippines... or Hastings... or... or this place!

COMPANY:
One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster
The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free
You'll find a god in every golden cloister
And if you're lucky then the god's a she
I can feel an angel sliding up to me

THE AMERICAN:
One town's very like another
When your head's down over your pieces, brother

COMPANY:
It's a drag, it's a bore, it's really such a pity
To be looking at the board, not looking at the city

THE AMERICAN:
Whaddya mean? Ya seen one crowded, polluted, stinking town...

COMPANY:
Tea, girls, warm, sweet, sweet
Some are set up in the Somerset Maugham suite

THE AMERICAN:
Get Thai'd! You're talking to a tourist
Whose every move's among the purest
I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine

COMPANY:
One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

THE AMERICAN:
Siam's gonna be the witness
To the ultimate test of cerebral fitness
This grips me more than would a
Muddy old river or reclining Buddha

And thank God I'm only watching the game, controlling it

I don't see you guys rating
The kind of mate I'm contemplating
I'd let you watch, I would invite you
But the queens we use would not excite you

So you better go back to your bars, your temples, your massage parlours

COMPANY:
One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster
The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free
You'll find a god in every golden cloister
A little flesh, a little history
I can feel an angel sliding up to me

One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble
Can't be too careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

[Wat_Tyler]

41. ...........

Ooh - sshook
Hey did you rock and roll
Rock on, ooh my soul
Hey did you boogie too, did ya?

Hey shout, summertime blues
Jump up and down in your blue suede shoes
Hey did you rock and roll, rock on

And where do we go from here?
Which is a way that's clear

Still looking for that blue jean baby queen
Prettiest girl I ever seen
See her shake on the movie screen, Jimmy Dean
James Dean

And where do we go from here?
Which is a way that's clear

Still looking for that blue jean baby queen
Prettiest girl I ever seen
See her shake on the movie screen, Jimmy Dean
Jimmy Dean - rock on - rock on ....

Hey did you rock and roll - rock on
Hey did you rock and roll - rock on
Hey did you rock and roll - rock on

[eyesroll]

42. Summer of '98, baby.

I had visions, I was in them,
I was looking into the mirror
To see a little bit clearer
The rottenness and evil in me

Fingertips have memories,
Mine can't forget the curves of your body
And when I feel a bit naughty
I run it up the flagpole and see who salutes
(But no one ever does)

I'm not sick, but I'm not well
and I'm so hot 'cause I'm in hell

Been around the world and found
That only stupid people are breeding
The cretins cloning and feeding
And I don't even own a TV

Put me in the hospital for nerves
And then they had to commit me
You told them all I was crazy
They cut off my legs now I'm an amputee, Goddamn you

I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And it's a sin to live so well

I wanna publish 'zines
And rage against machines
I wanna pierce my tongue
It doesn't hurt, it feels fine
The trivial sublime
I'd like to turn off time
And kill my mind
You kill my mind
Mind...

Paranoia, paranoia
Everybody's comin' to get me
Just say you never met me
I'm runnin' underground with the moles
Diggin' in holes
Hear the voices in my head
I swear to God it sounds like they're snoring
But if you're bored then you're boring
The agony and the irony, they're killing me, whoa!

I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And it's a sin to live this well

(One, two, three, four!)

[Wat_Tyler]

43. BICYCLE! BICYCLE! BICYCLE!

Bicycle bicycle bicycle
I want to ride my bicycle bicycle bicycle
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride it where I like

You say black I say white
You say bark I say bite
You say shark I say hey man
Jaws was never my scene
And I don’t like star wars
You say rolls I say royce
You say God give me a choice
You say lord I say christ
I don’t believe in peter pan
Frankenstein or superman
All I wanna do is

Bicycle bicycle bicycle
I want to ride my bicycle bicycle bicycle
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my
Bicycle races are coming your way
So forget all your duties oh yeah!
Fat bottomed girls they’ll be riding today
So look out for those beauties oh yeah
On your marks get set go
Bicycle race bicycle race bicycle race
Bicycle bicycle bicyi want to ride my bicycle
Bicycle bicycle bicycle
Bicycle race

[eyesroll]

45. Tick tock tick tock...

Must be getting early, clocks are running late.
Paint my love a morning sky, itÕs all cold.
Dawn is breaking everywhere, light a candle, curse the glare
Draw the curtains I donÕt care, but itÕs all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
I see youÕve got your list out, say your piece and kiss off.
Guess I get the gist of it, but itÕs all right
Oh well anyway, sorry that you feel that way.
Every silver linings got a touch of grey
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
ItÕs a lesson to me, the ablers and the beggars and the thieves
The abcÕs we all think of, try to win a little love.
I know the rent is in arrears, the dog has not been fed in years
ItÕs even worse than it appears, but itÕs all right
Cow is giving kerosene, kid canÕt read at seventeen
The words he knows are all obscene, but itÕs all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
Shoe is on the hand that fits, thatÕs all there really is to it
Whistle through your teeth and spit, but itÕs all right
Oh well a touch of grey, kinda suits you anyway,
ThatÕs all I had to say, but itÕs all right
I will get by, I will get by, I will get by, I will survive.
ItÕs a lesson to me, the devils and the east and the free
The abcÕs we all must face, try to save a little grace.

[Wat_Tyler]

46. When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful,

a miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical.
And all the birds in the trees, well they'd be singing so happily,
joyfully, playfully watching me.
But then they send me away to teach me how to be sensible,
logical, responsible, practical.
And they showed me a world where I could be so dependable,
clinical, intellectual, cynical.

There are times when all the world's asleep,
the questions run too deep
for such a simple man.
Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned
I know it sounds absurd
but please tell me who I am.

Now watch what you say or they'll be calling you a radical,
liberal, fanatical, criminal.
Won't you sign up your name, we'd like to feel you're
acceptable, respecable, presentable, a vegtable!

At night, when all the world's asleep,
the questions run so deep
for such a simple man.
Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned
I know it sounds absurd
but please tell me who I am.

[eyesroll]

49. Oh, you wanna play identity...

And IÕd give up forever to touch you
Õcause I know that you feel me somehow
YouÕre the closest to heaven that iÕll
Ever be
And I donÕt want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Õcause sooner or later itÕs over
I just donÕt want to miss you tonight
And I donÕt want the world to see me
Õcause I donÕt think that theyÕd
Understand
When everythingÕs made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you canÕt fight the tears that ainÕt
Coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know youÕre alive
And I donÕt want the world to see me
Õcause I donÕt think that theyÕd
Understand
When everythingÕs made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I donÕt want the world to see me
Õcause I donÕt think that theyÕd
Understand
When everythingÕs made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I donÕt want the world to see me
Õcause I donÕt think that theyÕd
Understand
When everythingÕs made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

[Wat_Tyler]

50. At least I can format my lyrics properly, sheesh!

Friday night and the lights are low
Looking out for the place to go
Where they play the right music, getting in the swing
You come in to look for a king
Anybody could be that guy
Night is young and the music's high
With a bit of rock music, everything is fine
You're in the mood for a dance
And when you get the chance...

You are the Dancing Queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing Queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the Dancing Queen

You're a teaser, you turn 'em on
Leave them burning and then you're gone
Looking out for another, anyone will do
You're in the mood for a dance
And when you get the chance...

You are the Dancing Queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing Queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the Dancing Queen

[eyesroll]

53. They made up their minds...

And they started packing
They left before the sun came up that day
An exit to eternal summer slacking

But where were they going without ever knowing the way?
They drank up the wine
And they got to talking
They now had more important things to say
And when the car broke down
They started walking
Where were they going without ever knowing the way?

Chorus:
Anyone could see
The road that they walk on is paved in gold
And it's always summer, they'll never get cold
They'll never get hungry
They'll never get old and gray
You can see their shadows
Wandering off somewhere
They won't make it home
But they really don't care They wanted the highway
They're happy there today, today

The children woke up
And they couldn't find 'em
They left before the sun came up that day
They just drove off
And left it all behind 'em
But where were they going without ever knowing the way?

[Wat_Tyler]

54. Uh-huh?

Ahh, crush, ahhh

I see ya blowin' me a kiss
It doesn't take a scientist
To understand what's going on baby
If you see something in my eye
Let's not over analyze
Don't go too deep with it baby

So let it be what it'll be
Don't make a fuss and get crazy over you and me
Here's what I'll do
I'll play loose
Run like we have a day with destiny

It's just a little crush (crush)
Not like I faint every time we touch
It's just some little thing (crush)
Not like everything I do depends on you
Sha-la-la-la, Sha-la-la-la

It's raising my adrenaline
You're banging on a heart of tin
Please don't make too much of it baby
You say the word "forevermore"
That's not what I'm looking for
All I can commit to is "maybe"

So let it be what it'll be
Don't make a fuss and get crazy over you and me
Here's what I'll do
I'll pay loose
Run like we have a day with destiny

It's just a little crush (crush)
Not like I faint every time we touch
It's just some little thing (crush)
Not like everything I do depends on you
Sha-la-la-la, Sha-la-la-la

Vanilla skies (vanilla skies)
White picket fences in your eyes
A vision of you and me

It's just a little crush (crush)
Not like I faint every time we touch
It's just some little thing (crush)
Not like everything I do depends on you
Sha-la-la-la
Not like I faint every time we touch
It's just some little thing
Not like everything I do depends on you
Sha-la-la-la
Not like I faint every time we touch
It's just some little thing
Not like everything I do
Depends on you

[eyesroll]

56. Red, red wine

Go to my head
Make me forget that i
Still need her so
Red, red wine
It`s up to you
All I can do, i`ve done
But mem`ries won`t go
No, mem`ries won`t go
I`d have thought
That with time
Thoughts of her
Would leave my head
I was wrong
And I find
Just one thing makes me forget
Red, red wine
Stay close to me
Don`t let me be alone
It`s tearin` apart
My blue, blue heart
---red red wine rap section---
Red red wine you make me feel so fine
You keep me rocking all of the time
Red red wine you make me feel so grand
I feel a million dollars when your just in my hand
Red red wine you make me feel so sad
Any time I see you go it makes me feel bad
Red red wine you make me feel so fine
Monkey pack him rizla pon the sweet dep line
Red red wine you give me whole heap of zing
Whole heap of zing mek me do me own thing
Redred wine you really know how fi love
Your kind of loving like a blessing from above
Red red wine I love you right from the start
Right from the start with all of my heart
Red red wine in a 80`s style
Red red wine in a modern beat style, yeah
(chorus)
Give me little time, help me clear up me mind
Give me little time, help me clear up me mind
Give me red wine because it make me feel fine
Mek me feel fine all of the time
Red red wine you make me feel so fine
Monkey pack him rizla on the sweet dep line
The line broke, the monkey get choke
Burn bad rizla pon him little rowing boat
Red red wine i`m gonna hold to you
Hold on to you cause I know you love true
Red red wine i`m gonna love you till I die
Love you till I die and that`s no lie
Red red wine can`t get you out my mind
Where ever you maybe i`ll surely find
I`ll surely find make no fuss jus` stick with us.
(chorus)
Red red wine you really know how fi love
Your kind of loving like a blessing from above
Red red wine I love you right from the start
Right from the start with all of my heart
Red red wine you really know how fi love
Your kind of loving like a blessing from above
Red red wine you give me whole heap of zing
Whole heap of zing mek me do me own thing
Red red wine in a 80`s style
Red red wine in a modern beat style, yeah

[Wat_Tyler]

57. Shiny Happy People evil-stylee.

Shiny happy people holding hands
Yes, that is correct, that's what we are seeing
Shiny happy people holding hands
("Go fuck yourself!")

Mummy, when you shoot up, dear,
do not spew up, dear, in baby's face here
Give him a few beers to dry his wee tears
and if his dad hears, he'll fuck you both, dear

Zeebrugge, '87, mass murder
Campaign contribution that goes no further
Innocent people lost their lives
for the killer's profit and another five
'cos the government by well-spanked arses, closet queens ("Masturbate,
masturbate.") making it a crime to be gay

Shiny happy people holding hands
Shiny happy people holding hands
("Go fuck yourself!")

Fuck your nuclear family
Fuck your passion for advertising
Fuck your show business
Most of all, fuck your show business

Shiny happy people holding hands
Shiny happy people holding hands
I must be blind, I can't see them!
Shiny happy people holding hands
Shiny happy people holding hands
("Masturbate, masturbate")

[eyesroll]

59. Are you gonna take me home tonight

Ah down beside that red firelight
Are you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls
You make the rockinÕ world go round
Hey I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad
But I knew life before I left my nursery
Left alone with big fat fanny
She was such a naughty nanny
Heap big woman you made a bad boy out of me
Hey hey!
IÕve been singing with my band
Across the wire across the land
I seen evÕry blue eyed floozy on the way
But their beauty and their style
Went kind of smooth after a while
Take me to them dirty ladies every time
Oh wonÕt you take me home tonight?
Oh down beside your red firelight
Oh and you give it all you got
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockinÕ world go round
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockinÕ world go round
Hey listen here
Now your mortgages and homes
I got stiffness in the bones
AinÕt no beauty queens in this locality (I tell you)
Oh but I still get my pleasure
Still got my greatest treasure
Heap big woman you gonna make a big man out of me
Now get this
Oh you gonna take me home tonight (please)
Oh down beside your red firelight
Oh you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockinÕ world go round
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockinÕ world go round
Get on your bikes and ride
Oooh yeah them fat bottomed girls
Fat bottomed girls
Yeah yeah yeah
Fat bottomed girls
Yes yes

[Wat_Tyler]

60. This is the winner.

Won't you come see about me?
I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby


Tell me your troubles and doubts
Giving me everything inside and out and
Love's strange so real in the dark
Think of the tender things that we were working on


Slow change may pull us apart
When the light gets into your heart, baby


Don't You Forget About Me
Don't Don't Don't Don't
Don't You Forget About Me


Will you stand above me?
Look my way, never love me
Rain keeps falling, rain keeps falling
Down, down, down


Will you recognise me?
Call my name or walk on by
Rain keeps falling, rain keeps falling
Down, down, down, down


Hey, hey, hey, hey
Ohhhh.....


Don't you try to pretend
It's my feeling we'll win in the end
I won't harm you or touch your defenses
Vanity and security


Don't you forget about me
I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby
Going to take you apart
I'll put us back together at heart, baby


Don't You Forget About Me
Don't Don't Don't Don't
Don't You Forget About Me


As you walk on by
Will you call my name?
As you walk on by
Will you call my name?
When you walk away


Or will you walk away?
Will you walk on by?
Come on - call my name
Will you all my name?


I say :
La la la...

[eyesroll]

61. Wat wears thongs.

This thing right here
Is lettin all the ladies know
What guys talk about
You know
The finer things in life
Hahaha
Check it out

Ooh dat dress so scandalous
And ya know another nigga couldn't handle it
See ya shakin that thang like who's da ish
With a look in ya eye so devilish

Uh
Ya like to dance at all the hip hop spots
And ya cruise to the crews like connect da dots
Not just urban she likes the pop
Cuz she was livin la vida loca

BRIDGE
She had dumps like a truck truck truck
Thighs like what what what
Baby move your butt butt butt
Uh
I think to sing it again
She had dumps like a truck truck truck
Thighs like what what what
All night long
Let me see that thong

CHORUS
I like it when the beat goes da na da na
Baby make your booty go da na da na
Girl I know you wanna show da na da na
That thong th thong thong thong
I like it when the beat goes da na da na
Baby make your booty go da na da na
Girl I know you wanna show da na da na
That thong th thong thong thong

That girl so scandalous
And I know another nigga couldn't handle it
And she shakin that thang like who's da ish
With a look in her eye so devilish

Uh
She like to dance at all the hip hop spots
And she cruise to the crews like connect da dots
Not just urban she likes the pop
Cuz she was livin la vida loca

BRIDGE

CHORUS (2x)

Whoaaa
That dress so scandalous
And I swear another nigga couldn't handle it
See ya shakin that thang like who's da ish
With a look in her eye so devilish

(Whoa)
Uh ya like to dance at all the hip hop spots
And ya cruise to the crews like connect da dots
Not just urban ya like the pop
Cuz she was livin la vida loca

(Whoa)
She had dumps like a truck truck truck
Thighs like what what what
Baby move your butt butt butt
(Ooh)
Uh think to sing it again
Cuz she had dumps like a truck truck truck
Thighs like what what what
Baby move your butt butt butt
Uh think to sing it again
Come on
Come on
Come on
Come on

Yeahhhh yeah

CHORUS (3x)

Whoa
Uh alright
Uh whoa yeah
Ooh
Whoa
(Like it when the beat goes da na da na)
(Baby make your booty go da na da na)
(Girl I know you wanna show da na da na)
Baby
(That thong th thong thong thong)

(I like it when the beat goes da na da na)
(Baby make your booty go da na da na)
(Girl I know you wanna show da na da na)
(That thong th thong thong thong)

.......to fade

[Wat_Tyler]

62. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I know a guy who's tough but sweet
He's so fine, he can't be beat
He's got everything that I desire
Sets the summer sun on fire

I want candy, I want candy

Go to see him when the sun goes down
Ain't no finer boy in town
You're my guy, just what the doctor ordered
So sweet, you make my mouth water

I want candy, I want candy

Candy on the beach, there's nothing better
But I like candy when it's wrapped in a sweater
Some day soon I'll make you mine,
Then I'll have candy all the time

I want candy, I want candy
I want candy, I want candy...

[Phillycat]

63. psst, eyesroll!

"Oh Mickey"! Now! Now!

[Wat_Tyler]

64. Don't bother. I can go nuclear.

[eyesroll]

66. This should do it.

Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt.
It is so big. *scoff* She looks like,
one of those rap guys' girlfriends.
But, y'know, who understands those rap guys? *scoff*
They only talk to her, because,
she looks like a total prostitute, 'kay?
I mean, her butt, is just so big. *scoff*
I can't believe it's just so round, it's like,
out there, I mean - gross. Look!
She's just so ... black!
I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waste
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull up tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But with that butt you got makes me feel so horny
Ooh, Rump-o'-smooth-skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupy
I've seen them dancin'
The hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy butt!
Baby got back!
(LA face with Oakland booty)
Baby got back!
I like 'em round, and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' bout Playboy
'Cause silicone parts are made for toys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Mix-a-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at rock videos
Watchin' these bimbos walkin' like hoes
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo
A word to the thick soul sistas, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna *fuck*
Til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So, ladies! {Yeah!} Ladies! {Yeah}
If you wanna role in my Mercedes {Yeah!}
Then turn around! Stick it out!
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back!
Baby got back!
Yeah, baby ... when it comes to females, Cosmo ain't got nothin'
to do with my selection. 36-24-36? Ha ha, only if she's 5'3".
So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin' workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
My anaconda don't want none
Unless you've got buns, hun
You can do side bends or sit-ups,
But please don't lose that butt
Some brothers wanna play that "hard" role
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that!
'Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'
To the beanpole dames in the magazines:
You ain't it, Miss Thing!
Give me a sista, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em
So ladies, if the butt is round,
And you want a triple X throw down,
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back!
(Little in the middle but she got much back) <4x>

[Wat_Tyler]

67. BWAAHAAHAAHAA!

Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her butt.
It is so big. *scoff* She looks like,
one of those rap guys' girlfriends.
But, y'know, who understands those rap guys? *scoff*
They only talk to her, because,
she looks like a total prostitute, 'kay?
I mean, her butt, is just so big. *scoff*
I can't believe it's just so round, it's like,
out there, I mean - gross. Look!
She's just so ... black!


I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waste
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull up tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But with that butt you got makes me feel so horny
Ooh, Rump-o'-smooth-skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupy
I've seen them dancin'
The hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy butt!
Baby got back!

(LA face with Oakland booty)
Baby got back!


I like 'em round, and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' bout Playboy
'Cause silicone parts are made for toys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Mix-a-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at rock videos
Watchin' these bimbos walkin' like hoes
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo
A word to the thick soul sistas, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna *fuck*
Til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So, ladies! {Yeah!} Ladies! {Yeah}
If you wanna role in my Mercedes {Yeah!}
Then turn around! Stick it out!
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back!

Baby got back!
Yeah, baby ... when it comes to females, Cosmo ain't got nothin'
to do with my selection. 36-24-36? Ha ha, only if she's 5'3".


So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin' workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
My anaconda don't want none
Unless you've got buns, hun
You can do side bends or sit-ups,
But please don't lose that butt
Some brothers wanna play that "hard" role
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that!
'Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'
To the beanpole dames in the magazines:
You ain't it, Miss Thing!
Give me a sista, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em
So ladies, if the butt is round,
And you want a triple X throw down,
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back!

(Little in the middle but she got much back) <4x>

[Wat_Tyler]

68. That's fuckin' hilarious!.

:7

[eyesroll]

73. Well done, Wat.

:bounce:

I think we can officially call time now.

[Phillycat]

40. GAH! GAH!

[a_random_joel]

33. Allright, I'm jumping in...

So, she says it's time she goes
but wanted to be sure I know
she hopes we can be friends
I think, yeah, I guess we can say I
but didn't think to ask her why
she blocked her eyes and drew the curtains
with knots I've got yet to untie
what if I were Romeo in black jeans
what if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with
See, it was just too soon to tell
and looking for some parallel
can be an endless game
We said goodbye before hello
my secrets she will never know
and if I dig a hole to China
I'll catch the first junk to Soho
what if I were Romeo in black jeans
what if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with
Sometime from now you'll bow to pressure
some things in life you cannot measure by degrees
I'm between the poles and the equator
don't send no private investigator to find me please
'less he speaks Chinese
and can dance like Astaire overseas
what if I were Romeo in black jeans
what if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with.

[Phillycat]

30. WHAT IN GOD'S NAME??

[ismnotwasm]

55. Oh my God

Green Jello wow. You win

[Beware the Beast Man]

7. Oooh, a powerful first shot by the Dudette from Dairy Country.

Truly this contest will be an epic of awesome proportion
/Cosell impression turned off.

[terrya]

3. I can't even begin to guess. This will be a real deathmatch.

:-)

[Phillycat]

5. Can other people play?

Love!

Love will keep us together!

Think of me babe whenever

Some sweet-talkin' girl comes along

Singin' her song...

[Magrittes Pipe]

24. Love, love will tear us apart again.

[sundog]

14. Can the audience vote?? I think our studio audience should have some input

[Beware the Beast Man]

16. Yes, we need judges and color commentators

[sundog]

47. Color commentators?? eyesroll has some catching up to do I'm afraid

[a_random_joel]

22. How can I get in on this?

[sundog]

48. start by posting some go awful lyric such as...

There'll be no strings to bind your hands
not if my love can't bind your heart.
And there's no need to take a stand
for it was I who chose to start.
I see no need to take me home,
I'm old enough to face the dawn.
Just call me angel of the morning, angel
just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby.
Just call me angel of the morning, angel
then slowly turn away from me.
Maybe the sun's light will be dim
and it won't matter anyhow.
If morning's echo says we ve sinned,
well, it was what I wanted now.
And if we're the victims of the night,
I won't be blinded by light.
Just call me angel of the morning, angel
just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby.
Just call me angel of the morning, angel
then slowly turn away,
I won't beg you to stay with me
through the tears of the day,
of the years, baby baby baby.
Just call me angel of the morning, angel
just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby.

[a_random_joel]

52. I knew that part, didn't want to be rude and jump in, like this...

I eat cannibal
Feed on animal
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals

I eat cannibal
It's incredible
You bring out the animal in me
I eat cannibals

What can you do
You're in a stew
Hot hot cook it up
I'm never gonna stop
Fancy a bite
My appetite
Yum yum gee it's fun
Banging on a different drum

And I eat cannibal
Feed on animal
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals

I eat cannibal
It's incredible
You bring out the animal in me
I eat cannibals

I like the spice
Tasty and nice
Roastin vitamin
Forget the dietin'
Mmm such a dish
I can't resist
Healthy recipe
What you got is good for me

And I eat cannibal
Feed on animal
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals

I eat cannibal
It's incredible
You bring out the animal in me
I eat cannibals

All I wanna do
Make a meal of you
We are what we eat
You're my kind of meat

Got a hunger for your love
(Hot pot cook it up, I'm never gonna stop)
It's all I'm thinkin' of
(Yum yum gee it's fun, I'm banging on a drum)
Give the world a bone
(Roastin vitamin, forget the dietin')
I got steak at home
(I eat cannibals)

I don't need no take away 'cause Chinese food is so risque
The menu is the venue where your heart is,
can't you see I'm not into foreign platters, loving you is all that matters
You're the kind of bull who's put the animal in me]

I eat cannibal
Feed on animal
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals

I eat cannibal
It's incredible
You bring out the animal in me
I eat cannibals

Roastin', toastin', you're the one I'm boastin'
Eat me, eat you, incredibly delicious too
Gourmet, flambe, serve you up an entree
Intake, home bake, you're the icing on the cake

Eat me, eat you, incredibly delicious too
Gourmet, flambe, serve you up an entree
Intake, home bake, you're the icing on the cake
Full up, can't stop, dicing on a chop chop

[redqueen]

35. None of these earworms are getting to me

but for some inexplicable reason, they have brought one from the 80's and I have no idea who it is or what the song is... just

hit me with your swizzle stick
two fat persons
click click click
hit me
hit me
hit me!



I'm losin it.

[Wat_Tyler]

37. Ahem. I shall not fail you, redqueen.

Artist
Ian Dury And The Blockheads Lyrics
Album
Sex & Drugs & Rock & Roll: The Best Of Ian Dury And The Bloc
Title
Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick
Song Lyrics
In the deserts of Sudan
And the gardens of Japan
From Milan to Yucatan
Every woman, every man

Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
Je t'adore, ich liebe dich,
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me slowly, hit me quick.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!

In the wilds of Borneo
And the vineyards of Bordeaux
Eskimo, Arapaho
Move their body to and fro.

Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
Das ist gut! C'est fantastique!
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
It's nice to be a lunatic.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!

Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!

In the dock of Tiger Bay
On the road to Mandalay
From Bombay to Santa Fe
Over hills and far away

Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Hit me! Hit me!
C'est si bon, mm? Ist es nicht?
Hit me! hit me! hit me!
Hit me with your rhythm stick.
Two fat persons, click, click, click.
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!

Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!
Hit me!
Hit me!
Hit me! Ow!
Hit me!
Hit me!
Hit me! hit me!
Hit me (x5)
Hit me! Hit me! Hit me

[redqueen]

71. You are my hero

:loveya:

[Wat_Tyler]

75. Viva the Peasant Revolution!

(apart from Queens) :hug:

[kick-ass-bob]

38. Slim Shady just got me....

[sundog]

44. ack - put this in your pipe & smoke it

There came a night leaving fear behind, shadows are on the ground
And nobody knew where to find him, no evidence was found
I'm never coming back, I heard him cry, and I believe him
He never meant to do anything wrong, it's gonna get worse if he waits too long

chorus:
Now Billy, Billy don't you lose my number
'Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you
Oh now Billy, Billy don't you lose my number
'Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you, oh

Searchin' through the day and into the night
They wouldn't stop until they found him
They didn't know him and they didn't understand, nobody asked him why
"Get out of my way", I heard a shout, then a blinding light
All I could see was him running down the street
Out of the shadows and into the night

chorus

Don't give up, keep running, keep hiding
Now don't give up, oh Billy, if you know you're right
Don't give up, 'cos you know that I am on your side
Don't give up, oh Billy
You better, you better, you better run for your life

(Solo)

chorus

There came a night leaving fear behind, shadows are on the ground
Nobody knew where to find him, no evidence was found
I'm never coming back, I heard him cry, and I believe him
He never meant to do anything wrong, it's gonna get worse if he waits too long

chorus

Billy, Billy don't you lose my number
'Cos you're not anywhere that I can find you, oh Billy

[redqueen]

72. AAAAAAAAAAAAAH... NOOOOOOOOO!

Not Phil Collins!

Anything but that!

:P

[a_random_joel]

58. Give up now. You cannot compete with this...

When I'm alone in my room sometimes I stare at the wall
and in the back of my mind I hear my conscience call
Telling me I need a girl who's as sweet as a dove
for the first time in my life, I see I need love
There I was giggling about the games
that I had played with many hearts, and I'm not saying no names
Then the thought occured, tear drops made my eyes burn
as I said to myself look what you've done to her
I can feel it inside, I can't explain how it feels
all I know is that I'll never dish another raw deal
Playing make believe pretending that I'm true
holding in my laugh as I say that I love you
Saying amor kissing you on the ear
whispering I love you and I'll always be here
Although I often reminsce I can't believe that I found
a desire for true love floating around
Inside my soul because my soul is cold
one half of me deserves to be this way till I'm old
But the other half needs affection and joy
and the warmth that is created by a girl and a boy
I need love
I need love

Romance sheer delight how sweet
I gotta find me a girl to make my life complete
You can scratch my back, we'll get cozy and huddle
I'll lay down my jacket so you can walk over a puddle
I'll give you a rose, pull out your chair before we eat
kiss you on the cheek and say ooh girl you're so sweet
It's deja vu whenever I'm with you
I could go on forever telling you what I do
But where you at you're neither here or there
I swear I can't find you anywhere
Damn sure you ain't in my closet, or under my rug
this love search is really making me bug
And if you know who you are why don't you make yourself seen
take the chance with my love and you'll find out what I mean
Fantasy's can run but they can't hide
and when I find you I'm gon' pour all my love inside
I need love
I need love

I wanna kiss you hold you never scold you just love you
suck on you neck, caress you and rub you
Grind moan and never be alone
if you're not standing next to me you're on the phone
Can't you hear it in my voice, I need love bad
I've got money but love's something I've never had
I need your ruby red lips sweet face and all
I love you more than a man who's 10 feet tall
I'd watch the sunrise in your eyes
we're so in love when we hug we become paralyzed
Our bodies explode in ecstasy unreal
you're as soft as a pillow and I'm as hard as steel
It's like a dream land, I can't lie I never been there
maybe this is an experience that me and you can share
Clean and unsoiled yet sweaty and wet
I swear to you this is something that I'll never forget
I need love
I need love

See what I mean I've changed I'm no longer
a play boy on the run I need something that's stronger
Friendship, trust honor respect admiration
this whole experience has been such a revelation
It's taught me love and how to be a real man
to always be considerate and do all I can
Protect you you're my lady and you mean so much
my body tingles all over from the slightest touch
Of your hand and understand I'll be frozen in time
till we meet face to face and you tell me you're mine
If I find you girl I swear I'll be a good man
I'm not gonna leave it in destiny's hands
I can't sit and wait for my princess to arrive
I gotta struggle and fight to keep my dream alive
I'll search the whole world for that special girl
when I finally find you watch our love unfurl
I need love
I need love

Girl, listen to me
When I be sittin in my room all alone, staring at the wall
fantasies, they go through my mind
And I've come to realize that I need true love
and if you wanna give it to me girl make yourself seen
I'll be waiting
I love you

[XNASA]

65. Wat isn't an American. I say 'disqualification'.

[Beware the Beast Man]

69. But I booked the match in American cyberspace.

Therefore it's American! :)

[XNASA]

74. Kinda like the Blue Jays being in the American League........

Or something like that? :shrug:

[Phillycat]

70. That is an excellent point.