Rush Limbaugh Picks Satan's Bellybutton Lint, Coos Softly

[trof]

Mark Morford-SF Gate Morning Fix

Conservative commentator and noted hunk of rancid satanic monkey-stroking bile Rush Limbaugh muttered that he resigned as an ESPN sports analyst to protect advertisers and network employees from the uproar over racist comments he made about Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb. Limbaugh stepped down from the sports network's "Sunday NFL Countdown" three days after saying on the show that McNabb was overrated because the media wanted to see a black quarterback succeed, and two days after his 235,887th piece of verbal and ideological proof to the universe as a whole that he should be strung up by his bitter shriveled racist homophobic testicles and slapped with large dead fish until he cries and begs to be kissed full on the mouth by a large gay black man named Ricky. Next up, Ann Coulter gets hired to provide color commentary for Monday Night Football, bitches about the inability of her old rusty DeWalt Heavy Duty Random Orbit Palm Sander to give her painful bitter resentful hate-filled self-immolating orgasms anymore.

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