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If the Gannon/Guckert story was an episode of Speed Racer-With Pictures!

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BigMcLargehuge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 09:44 AM
Original message
If the Gannon/Guckert story was an episode of Speed Racer-With Pictures!
Edited on Thu Feb-17-05 10:17 AM by BigMcLargehuge
Here he comes, here comes Speed Racer, he’s a demon on wheels…



We open in the pits just before the opening of the Desert 500

Pops: Speed HA HA did you see the story about that guy who got press credentials but is in reality a shill for the White House and a gay make prostitute HA HA?



Speed: Oooooooh!



Sparky: Are you saying this has something to do with the Mach-5’s hydraulic lifting legs Pops?

Pops: No you fool, HA HA!

Trixie: But why would the current administration allow such a person into the press corps? Speed, I’m scared.

Speed: I wonder if Racer-X is behind it! HA HA!



Narrator: Racer X, Speed’s greatest rival, also but unknown to him, his long lost older brother believed killed in a dangerous jungle race when Speed was just a boy. Racer X now drives the same circuits as Speed in the amazing Flaming Star! Will speed ever learn the identity of the mysterious masked racer?

Spritle and Chim Chim: What’s a gay male prostitute?



Pops: Ooooooh!

Sparky: Ahhhhhhh!

Pops: HA!

Cut to the middle of the desert race

Speed is driving fast over the parched and dusty course



Speed: If this Gannon/Guckert thing is true then what does it mean that the mainstream media is also totally in bed with this administration? HA HA! And what about what we read everyday or see on television? Ooooooohhh! How can we tell when we are seeing or reading real news or just getting the spin straight from the White House communications office? Ahhhhhhhh!

(A mysterious car pulls alongside the Mach-5 and tries to run Speed off the road)



Speed: Ooooooh! Ahhhhhh! HA HA!

The mysterious car disappears into the dust



Speed: I have to concentrate on the race! HA HA!

Suddenly, roadblock appears in the distance. Speed skids to a halt and meets three villains

Speed: Ooooh! Ahhhhh! HA HA!



Snake Gannon: It’s the end of the road for you Speed Racer! HA HA!



Pickles Bush: We’ve had enough of your meddling! Ohhhhhh Ahhhhhh!



Karl Rove: You can either drop the Gannon/Glucker story now or your family will suffer my wrath! Ooooh! Ahhhhhh!! HA HA! MUAHAHAHAH!!!

Narrator: What will Speed do? And what about the thread to the Racer Family? Tune in next week for another exciting episode of Speed Racer!

cue end theme song
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BigMcLargehuge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 10:53 AM
Response to Original message
1. kick
:kick:
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Crankie Avalon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 11:03 AM
Response to Original message
2. Kind of funny and I'm not even all that familiar with the cartoon...
...I bet there's also a lot of inside jokes I'm missing. :thumbsup:
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ChavezSpeakstheTruth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:22 PM
Response to Original message
3. Awesome!!!!
Now to create a Voltron version.........
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kick-ass-bob Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:25 PM
Response to Original message
4. OOH!
AAH!

:7
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arwalden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:25 PM
Response to Original message
5. OMG!! I Knew It All Along!
What WILL Speed do?

And WHY didn't Speed notice the scorpion on his shoulder?

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Cadence Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:25 PM
Response to Original message
6. That was cool! n/t
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flamingyouth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:27 PM
Response to Original message
7. ROFLMAOPIMP...
Hilarious. How's that baby of yours, Big? :hug:
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BigMcLargehuge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:30 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. she's great
:)

Sleeping 4 hours at a stretch at night, which is a relief. Ian is adapting well.



He likes to feed her and sit with her on his lap. He calls her "my baby", it's very cute!

How are things with you?
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flamingyouth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 12:31 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. Aww! Look at the proud big brother!
What a sweet picture!

All is well here with me, thanks. :)

I just love that pic.
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-17-05 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
10. OK. That's fucking hilarious!
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BigMcLargehuge Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 12:47 PM
Response to Original message
11. kick
:kick:
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DrWeird Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 05:05 PM
Response to Original message
12. Kurosawa could direct a Speed Racer episode that really made you think.
nt
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underpants Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-18-05 05:09 PM
Response to Original message
13. That is hilarious
I always loved that you didn't have to watch the whole show as they continually recapped the whole story line.


The Ooooooooh AAH! HA HA is classic speed racer
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