Late night humor

[buff2]

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset. Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest episode was another and stayed put. He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.

In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.

A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing, and swinging his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet.

As the drunk stood there, unsteady on his feet, staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard (barely containing his laughter) who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here?"

The drunk, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the shit out
of a ghost"

Happy Halloween! :evilgrin:

[AmyDeLune]

1. Kick! n/t

[Crazy Guggenheim]

2. HAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[KitchenWitch]

3. Good one!

:rofl:

[Tafiti]

4. I've got one.

A man wakes up from being put under during surgery, still heavily sedated. When the nurse walks in, he gets her attention, and barely stammers, "Nurse, are my testicles black?"

The nurse assures him they aren't, and tells him to rest.

He mumbles some more to get her attention, and this time more slowly, and a bit louder, asks "Nurse, are my testicles black?"

She feels sorry for the guy, so she grudgingly walks over to his bed and reaches under his gown for a quick examination. "No, they aren't black. You see? Everything is normal, now get some rest, OK?"

Then the man gets her attention one more time, and motions for her to lean in closer to him. This time, with all the diction he can muster, says, "That was nice, but...ARE. MY. TEST. RESULTS. BACK?"