Proof that girls are evil

[Scooter24]

This was sent to me by email :)

Proof that girls are evil:

First We state that girls require time and money.

Girls= Time x Money

And as we all know "time is money"

Time= Money

Therefore:

Girls= Money x Money= (Money)2

And because "money is the root of all evil";

Money= (square root)evil

Therefore:

Girls = ( (square root)evil )2

And we are forced to conclude that:

Girls = Evil

[RetroLounge]

1. You didn't...

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:
:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:
:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

RL

[Scooter24]

2. oh, but yes I did..

:popcorn: pass the butter :)

[djeseru]

3. Sure, I'm evil.

But it doesn't have anything to do with money. =)

[ForrestGump]

4. Please, thread, sink. Sink quickly, before more xx-people notice!

:scared:

Oops.


Sorry, dude. My intentions were good.

Good luck.

[I Have A Dream]

22. Next he'll be offering backrubs!

:rofl:

[Arkana]

5. I'm stealing this,

and pass the salt and butter. :popcorn:

[Ekirh]

6. "hands salt and butter"

I don't use either on my pop corn so you just keep it for yourself. . .

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

[Arkana]

8. Did you make that picture of the Burger King guy?

If so, that is absolutely inspired! :rofl:

[Ekirh]

9. No I didn't

I saw it on another board one day and figured I use it to replace my Commie Dog sig which was deemed to big. .. not to mention got more attention than me.

So I replaced it with this and lo and behold nothing changed. .. my sig still gets more attention than me.

[Arkana]

10. Don't feel bad--it's just cause everyone on this board hates

the Burger King guy--I know if I saw him standing outside my window, the first thing I'd probably go for is a shotgun. :P

[Ekirh]

11. I need to find it again

But I saw a web comic where that scenario does happen

Guy opens window

There is Burger King Guy

BLAM BLAM BLAM

R.I.P Burger King Guy :( or :) if you really hate him all that much ;).

[gollygee]

7. LOL I'm xx and I think it's funny

:D

[hfojvt]

12. that is the common misconception

it is not money that is evil, it is the LOVE of money. Therefore replacing love in your equation it is not girls that are evil, it is loving girls which is evil. Therefore, again, it is not girls that are evil, it is heterosexual males and lesbians which are evil.

You could almost put that in the Bible verse. 1 Timothy 6:10 "For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs."

Just replace the word "money" with "sex". I am sure Paul would approve.

[Deja Q]

13. Assuming you blindly believe the translation into English!

The verse itself seems way too wordy and forced.

Assuming, of course, the wealthy never created religion just to keep the slave classes in line.

[hfojvt]

20. If you want wordy and forced

"The function of money as a means of payment implies a contradiction without a terminus medius. In so far as the payments balance one another, money functions only ideally as money of account, as a measure of value. In so far as actual payments have to be made, money does not serve as a circulating medium, as a mere transient agent in the interchange of products, but as the individual incarnation of social labour, as the independent form of existence of exchange value, as the universal commodity." Das Kapital

Just playin' the game, the "money is the root of all evil" was quoted as if the source was taken seriously.

[Kellanved]

14. Not quite

The equation also has the solution girls = -evil.

[liontamer]

17. good point!

[In_The_Wind]

15. *

[warrior1]

16. Got dump huh?

Well

[liontamer]

18. why are we stating that girls require time and money?

We know that the biggest time and money sinks are children and pets

if we start with a factual statement we conclude that it is actually babies, puppies and kittens that are evil.

And while DU is okay with slamming women, I don't think you have the courage to post that kittens are evil in the lounge
:)

[Kellanved]

19. Then why would god kill them?

:shrug:

[I Have A Dream]

23. Oh, I hope to hell that he doesn't take you up on your kitten=evil idea!

It wouldn't be pretty! :)

[benny05]

25. Kitties are unevil

How many people do you hear about on the news that a cat attacked and killed?

[entanglement]

21. The proof can be trivially extended to include women

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

[I Have A Dream]

24. For some reason, I've never required that money be spent on me.

I must be defective. :cry:

[NNadir]

26. In your proof, you have failed to specify which root of evil money is.

It is quite possible that money is the seventh root of evil, or the 35th root of evil. There is an e/pi th root of evil. There are in fact and infinite number of possible roots of evil, both rational and irrational.

The assumption that money is the square root of evil is not justified.

With these things in mind, maybe you would like to evaluate this proof:

"Fruitcake is better than nothing. Nothing is better than sex. Therefore fruitcake is better than sex."

[Briarius]

27. man, I'm no good at math...

I was working that last one out and my answer keeps approaching having sex with a fruitcake, at which point I know I missed a 1/x or to carry the 1. Guess I'll have to try again...

[NNadir]

29. Be careful. Some things with fruitcakes, even consenting fruitcakes, are

still illegal in many states.

[bridgit]

28. whatever...

:rofl:

[In_The_Wind]

30. bridgit

You're gorgeous gf!