Why are YOU leaving DU? (just for laughs, please)

[Bossy Monkey]

Poll question: Why are YOU leaving DU? (just for laughs, please)

No offense to whinybutts; as I'm the king of Planet Whinybutt, I felt entitled to use the term.:)

Mods: No, I won't be upset or for that matter surprised if this gets locked.

[BigMcLargehuge]

1. Matcom made me take a plastic squirt gun to school

and I got suspended.

x( Bastard!!!!

[matcom]

5. i made you get a penile transplant too

i didn't hear you complaining then :eyes:

[BigMcLargehuge]

9. Well, now that I'm hung like an elephant seal

only the beach prudes complain.

But the squirt gun man, that was way over the line.

[LSK]

2. well....

As one of WilliamPitts 95,000 sock puppets, nobody replies to my pearls of wisdom. My freeper girlfriend is not impressed with my trolling abilities and Planet Whinybutt is calling me home so I can get a life. I would go into more detail but my cat named "Moran" is not letting me type anymore, so I will reserve that information for my highly dramatic and completely original Why I'm Leaving DU thread, thank you very much!

:popcorn:

[Anarcho-Socialist]

3. The Heritage Foundation has commissioned me

to extract blood from stray animals for Dick Cheney's weekly feast.

[terrya]

4. We're STILL forced to drink Andre champagne in the mods hot tub.

:grr:

[matcom]

6. wildhorses keeps PMing me naked photos of herself

and i'm too innocent x(

[Deja Q]

17. She is so evil!!

I wonder if she'll show me what you saw... :D

[RevCheesehead]

7. Definitely the cat's fault.

Not only is CC all over the keyboard, but he's about to be bundled up and taken to the V-E-T in a few seconds.

I'll be back later this afternoon. :hi:

[Bossy Monkey]

25. The monkey has relented and will let me play on the laptop

having been bribed with early morning scritches.:hi: back

(You spelled out "vet"! Cats can read!:rofl:)

[RevCheesehead]

29. Hey, I don't put anything past the furry monsters!

Cat went to V-E-T and stayed overnight, since he's having a procedure done this morning to clear his sinuses. Now the other two are worried because he's not around. Well, OK, his little brother is worried. But Oreo is purring her "thank you; when are we getting rid of the other one?" too. :)

[LostinVA]

8. Because I refuse to give up watching "Lost"

[FILAM23]

10. The reason shall have to wait

until I decide to leave

[swimboy]

11. They wouldn't validate my parking.

:thumbsdown:

[Avalux]

12. Because no one will clean the moderator hot tub.

I mean geez - haven't been able to get in the thing for weeks. x(

[xchrom]

13. i was crowned Queen of Planet Whinybutt.

and i have to have the Bitch Throne reupholstered.

[Rosie1223]

14. Got a new job as a Jesus Camp Counselor

so I'll just lurk until the rapture.

[NC_Nurse]

24. Bwaaahahahaha!

I LOVE that "clusterfuck accomplished" thingie!

[idgiehkt]

15. because

people like to make jokes about other people's pain?

[SOteric]

16. I'd tell you, -but then I'd have to

kill you with a slow, lingering overdose of the Brazilian joke.

[FuzzySlippers]

18. I'm leaving before they find out I'm

benburch's sock puppet and TS me.

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

[MnFats]

19. Keith Richards fell from another tree: Rolling Stones want me to replace..

...him on guitar for remainder of current tour...

[zonkers]

20. I find myself creating copycat threads in real life.

[niallmac]

21. I thought I had joined Dimwitted Underlings. My bad.

[merh]

22. I heard this was an echo chamber and everyone suffered from

"hive think" and folks keep disagreeing with me and arguing with me.

FFS, you all are not paying attention to the folks from the dark side, they said we all are supposed to be saying the same thing and using the same talking points. Didn't you all get the memo!!! I'm series !!!1!!1 :mad:

[bigwillq]

23. Because Mrs. Grumpy never PMed me back yet....

that bitch...... :P ;) :)


See ya.

[ProfessorGAC]

26. Because You Won't Disclose Your Location!

The Professor

[catmandu57]

27. Sniff sniff because NOBODY LIKE ME

Wagh whine sniff I can't help it if I've got bad breath and b.o. :cry:

[leftofthedial]

28. Personally, I just can't stand all the cliques

anymore.