Man, I saw a promo for that "300" film.

[terrya]

That sure looks like one big homoerotic film. Some serious looking manmeat in that.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

1. Well, it is based on a true ancient greece story.

:shrug:

[mainegreen]

2. I've read Theucydides, and I'll tell you it was a lot less entertaining and sexy than the previews

looked.
:rofl:

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

3. Well, less entertaining anyway.

:rofl:

[Aristus]

4. As one who knows a fair bit about the stand of the Spartans at Thermopylae,

I can tell you, this movie looks really, seriously f*****g stupid! I was excited to see it until I saw the promo. It looks like a cross between "Braveheart" and "Sin City", for Pete's sake.

And all that pseudo-relevant (if you're a brain-dead Bushista) talk about "freedom, freedom, freedom" is just idiotic in any story about the Spartans. Sparta was a brutal, repressive military monarchy. Any true Spartan would have laughed himself silly at the modern notion of "freedom".

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

5. Well, yeah.

And Clash of the Titans wasn't like the real sinking of Atlantis at all.

:crazy:

[Aristus]

8. Plus, Lawrence Olivier didn't look Greek enough to suit me.

Stupid film. :silly: :+

[mainegreen]

6. But, but, but, they were EQUAL!

If you were a male citizen (what that was like 5% of Sparta?)
:rofl:

:yourock:

[sasquatch]

9. DING, DING, DING, DING!!! WE HAVE A WINNER!!

WINNA, WINNA, CHICKEN DINNA!

[xmas74]

12. It's the same guy who did Sin City.

He wrote a graphic novel about this and has made it into a movie.

If you hated Sin City this will not be up your alley.

[LostInAnomie]

14. BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Don't poo poo a cool looking action flick. You don't go there expecting anything close to historical accuracy. That's like lambasting a Jackie Chan movie because it doesn't give an accurate portrayal of Chinese society.

[ghostsofgiants]

15. If you go into this movie expecting a true historical representation, you're an idiot.

Simple as that.

And it actually WAS written by Frank Miller, the dude who wrote Sin City. It's only meant to be loosely based on the battle.

[MadAsHellNewYorker]

7. Did you catch this imdb review?

Stunning in almost every way., 17 February 2007
Author: Jeff from Maryland


I just saw a movie that'll give your eyes boners, make your balls scream and make you poop DVD copies of THE TRANSPORTER. It's called 300. I don't know what the title has to do with the movie, but they could have called it KITTENS MAKING CANDLES and it'd still rule. It's about these 300 Greek dudes who stomp the sugar-coated sh-- out of like a million other dudes. I have a feeling that a lot of high school sports coaches are going to show this film to their teams before they play. Also, gay dudes and divorced women are going to use screen captures for computer wallpaper. The movie takes place about a million years ago, and it's sort of like a prequel to SIN CITY. Except way less guns and cars but twice as much skull splitting. If you watch this movie and go into a Taco Bell, and say to the cashier, "I need some extra sauce packets" guess what? You're getting twenty sauce packets because the look on your face will punch him in the brain. I can't spoil the plot because THERE ISN'T ONE. Just ass kicking that kicks ass that, while said ass is getting kicked, is kicking yet more ass that's hitting someone's balls with a hammer made of ice but the ice is frozen whiskey.

TWO COOL THINGS ABOUT THE MOVIE AND ONE THING I DIDN'T LIKE: COOL THING ONE: HEAVY METAL MUSIC DURING BATTLE SCENES: Who gives a sh-- if the music isn't historically correct? LORD OF THE RINGS could have used some Journey. This movie has that chu-CHUNG kind of metal that you hear in your head when your shift supervisor at Starbucks is telling you that you'll have to stay late for clean-up and you wish you had a sock filled with quarters in your hand.

COOL THING TWO: FOES, MINI-BOSSES AND A BIG BOSS: Basically, the Greek dudes are fighting these Persian dudes, but the director, who must have a dick made of three machine guns, does it all like a video game. The Greeks fight every death metal video from the last ten years. There's wave after wave of giants, freaks, ninjas, mutants, wizards, and a hunchback who looks like he's got Rosie O'Donnell on his back. Would I have been happy if Dom DeLuise from HISTORY OF THE WORLD, PART I had shown up? Maybe, but this movie more than makes up for that glaring oversight.

NOT SO GOOD THING: DUDE NUDITY ("DUDE-ITY"): These were Greek times, when there were a lot of naked women around. And there are some naked women in this film, but almost every naked woman scene has a muscular dude giving the screen an ass picnic. Dude-ity is something directors put in their movies so people will think they're serious, I guess, and not just throwing in naked hotties. Any directors reading this - IT'S OKAY TO JUST THROW IN NAKED HOTTIES. Can't someone make a movie about naked Amazons and call it "PAUSE BUTTON"?

[Aristus]

10. Man, that is HILARIOUS!

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

I bet it is twenty times more entertaining that the movie itself.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

11. LOL

Sounds like my kind of movie.

:thumbsup:

[Squatch]

13. Read the book "Gates of Fire"

[driver8]

16. I saw this movie at work...

It is BLOODY!!

Be prepared...

[InvisibleTouch]

17. I love ancient history action-adventures.

I don't expect them to be historically accurate. I just enjoy the ambiance. :)