I would like to become a stay-at-home ticket scalper

[Merrick]

Just received the tickets I purchased for next week's sold out Arcade Fire show here in LA mailed from, where else but Minnesota. Which begs the question, how can I make a fortune obtaining priority access to sought after tickets for shows all over the country so I can re-sell them on the web for a premium? Anybody? Out of the last ten concerts I've been to, I'd say six I've had to resort to going on ebay to get the tickets, and not once were they sent from anybody who lives anywhere remotely close to SoCal.

Seriously, how does one become such a parasite? I'm tired of commuting to a real job like a sucker.