Just because I need to rant (get opinions) somewhere...

[SarahB]

My 11 year old son's Little League coach has been pretty damned rude and since I've known the guy who heads up Little League in my town for the past 12 years, I'm considering causing a bit of a fuss because this coach. I do respect and admire those who do volunteer to do this, so I just need some feedback to know if I'm being out of line here.

For those who don't know, I'm remarried, live in the same town as my ex. We share custody and are fairly amicable here.

First of all, my name. It's 2007 and there are plenty of kids do not have the same last name as their mom. Initially in his e-mails, he got it right. Then all of the sudden I noticed he changed it in his contact list to put my former married name (WTF?). I let it go, but in any return e-mails, always signed my actual last name in bold. The doofus still didn't pick up on it (or he's an ass trying to make some statement).

Secondly, the e-mails themselves. He will sometimes send as many as 6 or 7 per day, often just random crap like upcoming camps the kids can go to, schedule stuff we already have, etc. Because of all the e-mails, I don't check them quickly. However, he does not communicate much of anything in person. Apparently, the first playoff game was this morning which he sent in an e-mail yesterday (not on the schedule). Both his dad and I missed the e-mail (again, he sends a lot of random stuff daily), but his dad, stepdad, and I are all professionals with very busy work schedules (I'm a nurse working full-time, his dad's a hospital administrator, my husband's in school and working 60+ hours a week). The game today was rained out anyway!!! Still, he was rude to my daughter when she tried to take a message (she's 15 at at her dad's recovering from a minor orthopedic surgery she had done Thurs), was rude to me ("You do understand that playoff games are important?" as he talked to me like a Kingergartener when I explained politely that I missed his e-mail). He's supposed to have the game tomorrow morning instead.

He also completely dismissed my ex when he had been volunteering to help (with his job, not only easy to do balancing time-wise) once one of his buddies could help. He always puts in his kid or his friends' kids in starting positions even though my son is one of the more experienced players. I could deal with it if it were just me, but don't take kindly to people acting like assholes to my kids.


Should I say something to my acquaintance who heads the league or just suck it up? I'm not a meddling mom. I've been involved in my kids' sport since my 15 year old did gymnastics at the age of 3 and never caused any stir, but this is a bit much.

[Crazy Dave]

1. I'd say something, if not you or anybody else....

...then you all are just enablers for somebody like that. I don't mean that the way it may sound, with hostility. The most important people involved in this are the kids. I could get over an idiot like that getting pissed at me even for his own incompetence but when a dope like that retaliates against the kids it's time for action. The first person to step forward will have others follow behind. Looking out for your daughter's and other children's well being is not "meddling".

Good luck and do the right thing :hi:

[Lars39]

2. He expects total immersion.

Confront him directly about the rudeness and explain that the volume of email dilutes his message.
I'm betting that you'll have to go over his head. This kind of coach(only playing his buddy's kids in key positions,etc) is one reason we got out of baseball.

[Crazy Dave]

3. I've seen worse

A friend of mine who used to coach said that a kid's own parents would tell him not to let their kid play as he wasn't that good and their team might not with a playoff game. Now that's pretty bad. They still wanted their kid to have a trophy on their mantle but they didn't want their kid to screw that up by trying to earn it.

It's some of the parents too...that's why he got out of coaching

Me personally, I'm getting involved with:
http://www.jacksonvillemiracleleague.org/

No egos. Just giving handicapped kids the right to play sports and the same quality facilities as the ones that are healthy, physically and mentally fit.

[Wapsie B]

4. I would say something to your acquaintance.

No question about it. Working where I do I hold others to the same standards of behavior and treatment of others as I am. If I would ever act like this guy, to either a patient, doctor, co-worker, or whoever I would hear about it in no uncertain terms, as would you.

[Darth_Kitten]

5. You've been too patient..........

how have you been meddling? :shrug:

He's rude, condescending, and somewhat of a bully. Say something please.

[Lex]

6. Little League appears to be some families' total lives and devotion

and I think those kind of families lose perspective that not every family lives and breathes Little League.

Might help him to understand your family life does not revolve around Little League and there are other interests/schedules/activities going on.

He needs to get a grip and respect that.

[SarahB]

8. I think that's a huge part of it.

My ex told me he's on workman's comp and doesn't work, so basically this is his life. With three parents, full-time professional jobs, and five kids in total, we don't have that luxury. You're right on.

[NashVegas]

7. Speak to the League Honcho

Have your list handy. It is in the League's interest to talk to the guy, if he's a good coach and fire him if not.

[SarahB]

9. I think I will.

My 5 year old's in T-ball and I love his coach (and those t-ballers are tough!) so I think I'll mention the good with the bad. He's a decent guy, so he should be pretty cool about it. I know it's tough to get parents to do this, but coaches that are parents need to remember the big picture which is teamwork and families.

[SarahB]

10. Thank you all.

I think I'm going to figure out a nice little e-mail to send to my LL commissioner acquaintance. At least I know I'm not being oversensitive here. :)

p.s. Can ya'll tell I have too much time on my hands today. :silly:

[Redstone]

11. Little League is always like that. Avoid it if you can. 90% of the coaches are

stone assholes. (The other 10% would be any DUers who are Little League coaches.)

Redstone