I hate major chunks of my life...

[gmoney]

And now bullshit encroaches on the one chunk of my life that makes the others tolerable...

[Phillycat]

1. Photography? Or your love life?

[Droopy]

2. My lost decade

That's one major chunk of my life that I've been trying forcefully to forget, but it always seems to come back to haunt me. All we can do, I think, is to try to assimilate those bad times into our consciousness and think about them rationally. Some of the sting might go away then. Once you know something you can't go back and un-know it. Better to own it.

[raccoon]

3. You and me both. For the past few years, I've been remembering things from my past

that I haven't thought of in decades. Most of these memories are mundane, many are sad or painful. I posted about this in the Seniors forum.

I wish I could just dump them in the recycle bin and forget them. But maybe Droopy is right.

How old are you, by the way?

[gmoney]

6. well, maybe "chunks" was the wrong term... "aspects" ?

I hate my house, I hate living in Ohio, I hate my pitiful social life, I hate my so-called love life, I hate my financial situation, I hate my health situation, I hate that the current political/economic/societal/environmental situation...

I'm in my early 40s with not much to show for all that time here on earth... but I guess you could say that entire chunks have been wasted, too.

I'm down, but I'll be OK, I think. Just needed to vent.

[cobalt1999]

13. You're only in your early 40's

Move!

No excuses, if you don't like where you live, your house, your love life, your social life, MOVE!

[CBHagman]

14. No, I got the chunks bit all right.

I've been known to have major chunk discontent problems of my own! :-)

What do you need right now? Is venting really the only need, or do you want cheering up? A plan? Attention?

I do think that David Burns and all the cognitive therapists have the right idea: When you're distraught or depressed, don't talk yourself into feeling worse than ever.

[gmoney]

15. not sure what I need...

I guess I can't go wrong with cheering up and/or attention though.

As for talking myself into feeling as bad as possible about a situation, that seems to be genetic.

[CBHagman]

16. As someone descended from pessimists...

...I can tell you that it's possible to change sides. You won't turn into Pollyanna if you cultivate a kinder way to treat yourself. Part of it is acknowledging that it is a statistical impossibility for things always to go wrong! See link below for the explanation of that.

http://healthymind.com/s-distortions.html

Whatever path you choose to take, when you're so deeply discouraged about how things are going, you're going to need allies, not doom-and-gloomers. And if you make yourself your own ally, that's part of the job accomplished.

[gmoney]

17. You mean?

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone, people like me?

Sorry for the sarcasm, but "Stuart Smalley" ruined the idea of positive self-talk for at least one generation of us...

Thanks for the link. I'll check it out. There's an ad for home lobotomy kits on there, too.

[skyblue]

19. Join the Club. I'm going thru' some shit

check out the Kubler Ross 5 stages of grief. (i can't fig out how to work computer otherwise i'd put the wikipedia link here). I've decided I'm at stage 2 = anger. At least it may put things in perspective if you're trying to get over something.

I've also decided I need to learn to be an adult. Which means I can't be on this website so often anymore.

But go out or get a hobby. Sex and Drugs and Rock and Roll (re: Ian Dury) doesn't work for everyone as far as coping.

[CBHagman]

20. No, I just mean don't savage yourself.

Believe me, I hate quick fixes too. They sell a lot of magazines ("Lose 40 pounds by Thanksgiving!") and keep people tuned in to talk shows, but the risk is focusing on the superficial.

But I find that the older I get, the more it matters to me that I just cut through the crap and look at things realistically but -- and this is a big but -- without adding to any discouragement, sorrow, or fear I already have.

That's why I mentioned the cognitive distortions. They're all the ways we torture ourselves and other people.

Speaking of other people, watch out for the energy vampires, too -- those who suck the life out of you, as it were. I think most of us have had a relative, co-worker, or friend of that variety. These range from garden-variety kvetches to people who faithfully rain on your parade to high-maintenance types who are exhausting to be around. Their presence is sometimes a cue that you need to take a walk or check your e-mail or get the laundry out of the dryer.

[MissHoneychurch]

4. What is the matter?

pm or email me please

[Fox Mulder]

5. So do I.

I hate everything about my life right now.

I just want to make it all go away.

[gmoney]

8. Maybe the aliens will take us?

"Blisstonia" has high levels of bliss, I'm told. :/

The Movementarians might be onto something...

[bicentennial_baby]

7. We could go sunbathing...

:D

[gmoney]

9. if I wasn't stuck in Ohio... that would be a good start.

It's always something...

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

10. If I could forget one year it would be 2006.

It was an emotional rollercoaster of emotions. Things that happen last year prevent me from trusting love and I hate that.

[gmoney]

11. Trust is a big part to lose... so sorry!

Hope you find them again... trust AND love.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

12. I do too ...

[Bucky]

18. just beggin for a copy cat

Will do.

[LynzM]

21. Sorry, dude....

:hug: Hey, you do get to hang with naked women and take fantastic pics of them, if I do say so myself.

You ever thought about moving to someplace a bit crazier, where you might have more people who'd make use of your skill? (NYC or something?) I know you wouldn't have as many contacts there, starting out, but.... if you're so unhappy with Ohio, what's keeping you there?

And one more :hug: for good measure!

[gmoney]

26. Thanks dude :)

Yeah, that's the part that has been keeping me sane... somewhat.

The business and the house of doom are keeping me here for the moment. At least until the bankruptcy and eviction. :)

And then again, no matter where I go, there I am...

Big hugs though... you're the best!

[DarkTirade]

22. Major Chunk reporting for duty sir!

[gmoney]

33. I hate Major Chunk of the Goonies!

Actually, I'm probably the only person who's not seen that movie...

[halobeam]

23. just looked around last night...

thought, man, I don't laugh much anymore. I have always had the nature of being bubbly. I bet some people that knew me well for many years, that haven't seen me in the last decade, would not recognize me.

Change something. Go out and get something that will make you happy. I find I'm standing in my own way at this point, do you feel like that? Much like a poster (above) said, nurture yourself. Do you have energy vampires in your life? I do. Major players, too. Got to make a major change.
We have many more choices than we realize. Some are just a new perception, that which doesn't cost a red cent, and can't be taken from us. Maybe a short list (3?) things that we will live as our own values, and never cross the line on; one could be to treat ourselves as well as we treat others. (That's my thing, anyway.. not sure if it could apply even loosely, to you.. don't really know you LOL)

Sorry you feel this way right now. Some days are better than others, thats for sure. Another promising fact is that when things really suck, you know nothing stays the same, forever. Change will inevitably occur. Our fortunate role in this life, is that we can direct the change if we are willing to.

I hope something "gives" for you REAL soon!

[gmoney]

27. well, waiting for the other shoe to drop...

...and waiting to see how many dominos fall when the shoe drops and if they also manage to knock down the house of cards...

(Mixed Metaphors R Us)

But thanks for the kind words and suggestions... I'm thinking the "going out and getting something that will make me happy" has part of the problem. Starting to suspect that the happiness thing has to come from within.

Considering getting into transcendental meditation, based on a lecture and an audiobook by David Lynch I listened to a week or two ago. "Go inside and dive into the bliss that dissolves the suffocating rubber clown suit of fear and anxiety" or words to that effect.

I think I may BE an energy vampire, too, just to make things worse.

Vampire clowns with shoes dropping all over the dominos and the cards... no wonder I'm confused. :)

[halobeam]

30. hey..

We all get confused LOL.. just see my response to JVS on this thread


LMAO... how's that for totally "clueless"? :rofl:

btw: yeah, it does come from inside.. (for me though, one of my personal challenges is getting "outside")

[JVS]

24. cheer up

"Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life" -- Jesus

[halobeam]

28. pardon

I never quite "get" quotes, sometimes, I look into them so deeply, and yet they are just plain simple. Care to give an insight to this quote?

I look into it;

Whoever loves his life loses it.. so you love your life, you are going to die one day, it will be no more.

Whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life... if you don't appreciate your life, which is a gift, you will get EXACTLY this, forever.


OUCH MAN.

lol

Or is it that you love your life, so you aren't REALLY looking closely enough, there's no joy w/o pain, etc.. so you really lost life by not having lived it?

Whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life... hating the injustice, the greed, etc, with so much passion in THIS world (full of all these things) and you will be rewarded with eternal life?

So? Are any of these close?

Or do I need to just get back to politics?

Oh yeah, be kind.

[gmoney]

31. Yeah, I just scratched my head at that one...

maybe it means if you hate your life, it'll just drag on and on like some tortuously bad movie you can't walk out of... like Jesus portrayed by Bill Paxton.

[halobeam]

32. Heh!

:rofl: Okay, now I'm laughing, and we DO know, that's a good thing.

Hope you are too!

[JVS]

34. exactly time flies when you're having fun and drags on forever when you're wretched

[lost-in-nj]

25. Hey hon

don't.....

concentrate on the good
your absolutely beautiful, surreal and awesome
photos.....

they are-I can't even think of the word.....

wonderful


lost

:hi: :hug:

lost

[gmoney]

29. thanks, o lost one...

I appreciate your sweet comment... I'm at least cheering up to the point that a little ego stroking feels good. :)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

35. my job makes me cranky. i am cranky to lisa. all of a sudden my home life is upset.

so i understand that completely. sorry. :hug:

[gmoney]

36. Thanks...

I guess everyone has their cranky times... ;)