Why...y'all are a bunch of smartasses!

[dawgmom]

I like this place. Can I stay here? They're mean in the other places, and they don't have a sense of humor.

[mainegreen]

1. Sure, but you need to memorize all the necessary history about the lounge.

Olive Garden, Oscar, Rachel Ray, Chuggo, and the like.

There will be a quiz.

[dawgmom]

2. Oh, dear. No one said there would be pop quizzes.

Can't I just sleep with the teacher or something?

[Midlodemocrat]

3. Sorry, no. All the hot teachers are taken.

Better get reading.

[Critters2]

11. I'm not taken. nt

[dawgmom]

21. But your gender is undeclared

When you go through Customs, do you say, "I have nothing to declare?"

[Critters2]

24. It is?! I'd forgotten. But, are you saying you discriminate based on gender?!

I thought this was a Progressive website!!

[dawgmom]

28. Progressive Car Insurance?

Love their ads.

[Critters2]

30. Corporatist.

:eyes:

[dawgmom]

35. I've been called worse

I was told the other day that I'm part of "the investor class." Evidently a 401K with a few bucks in it qualifies for some DU-ers.

[Midlodemocrat]

23. Silly. You're not a guy.

[Critters2]

26. It turns out I'm undeclared. So, maybe I am. I'll do some checkin' and get back to ya, Katie. nt

[AirmensMom]

4. HIstory?

Who needs history?

BTW, I just got back from Olive Garden. Took my daughter and breast fed her while I smoke a cig. :evilgrin:

[mainegreen]

6. I should sick my pit bull on you!

x(

[AirmensMom]

9. I'll retaliate and

post two dozen kitty pics! That'll kill you with cuteness!


:D

[flvegan]

5. Chicken, fercryinoutloud!

[AirmensMom]

7. Vegan!

:rofl:

[mainegreen]

8. I heard Skinner loves chicken.

Could talk about it all day.

[DarkTirade]

10. Umm, hello... kudzu and dont tutch the bot?

How could you leave those out?

[mainegreen]

13. 'Cuz I'm lazy. Anyways 'and the like' covers everything else.

Nyah.

:P

[dawgmom]

16. May I ask questions?

For example....what is the air speed velocity of a fully laden swallow? Also, would it make a difference if Schrödinger's cat had a litter box? And finally, who put the bomp in the bomp-a-bomp-a-bomp?

[Gormy Cuss]

49. You will find all the answers here in this post.

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. Also sitting in are McCain and Palin. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

Sarah pipes up and asks:"In what respect, George?"

[DarkTirade]

12. Humor is illogical.

[Critters2]

15. Strawman. nt

[DarkTirade]

17. No, vulcan.

That's a straw man.

[Critters2]

19. Thanks for the clarification!

What the hell was I thinking?!

[DarkTirade]

22. If you only had a brain...

Hmm... know anybody who could get you one? I'm in need of a heart myself.

[Critters2]

36. Well, I do have a job. For the time being. So, gotta go.

But, my advice is that you follow that road with the oddly-colored pavement. After the Union rally the International Guild of Lollipop Makers, Local 119 is holding. They've come out for Obama, but it pretty much went without saying. Something about them considering Palin a witch.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

14. My dear dawgmom!

Welcome to the Lounge!

It's the living, beating heart of DU!

And yes, we are a bunch of smartasses...:P


But we always can use another one in the group!

:hi:

[dawgmom]

37. Thank you!

I appreciate your welcome. *picture me doing my best Sallie Field, you like me, you really like me, impression*

[LeftyFingerPop]

18. Just don't post any cat pictures. The lounge hates cats. n/t

[Midlodemocrat]

20. And never ask for vibes. We suck at compassion.

[dawgmom]

25. I have a vibe, but I never share it

Unsanitary, you know.

[Critters2]

27. You'll find people askin' for it around here. It's what we do. nt

[flvegan]

29. Good that you bring this up, as the Lounge is a great place for sex threads.

The Mods love them.

:popcorn:

[dawgmom]

32. Unh uh

Mama didn't raise no fool.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

34. ROFLMAO!

:rofl: :rofl:

:spank: :spank:

[dawgmom]

31. May I ask questions about cats?

I posed one above. Would it have made a difference if Schrödinger's cat had a litter box?

[LeftyFingerPop]

33. Locking. No cat threads. First warning. n/t

[LeftyFingerPop]

38. Unlocking. I reconsidered. n/t

[dawgmom]

39. Indecisive? Have you no backbone?

And if not, how do you sit up in a chair?

[LeftyFingerPop]

40. Locking again. Please do not insult pretend moderators. Thank you. n/t

[dawgmom]

41. I am suitably chastised. I shan't disrespect the pretend moderator again

Nah. Just pretending.

[LeftyFingerPop]

42. Hehe...

Welcome to the lounge! :hi:

[dgibby]

43. Truer words were never spoken!

I told somebody on another thread to go back into the shop for repairs-they forgot to install a sense of humor. Then suggested he ask for his money back. I think I really ticked him off, especially since he was trying to inform the rest of us as to his superior knowledge of .....wait for it....economics!
What can I say?
:shrug: :evilgrin:

[dawgmom]

44. Very intense...very intense

Some of the folks on DU are very intense, by my observation. I can be that way sometimes too, but usually I have friends around who will remind me that I am, ultimately, a dork-ette. And they remember all the dork-ette things I've ever done. That's the problem with the internet. A lot of people are on their own, and they don't have anybody that they trust enough to tell them when they're being a mondo zippy dweeb.

By the way -- I hated economics more than any single class I ever had in college. I think most economists are simply talking out of their asses, and have no clue as to what's really going to happen.

[dgibby]

46. I am math impaired!

I don't want to say I had trouble with math, but my hs algebra teacher was planning to adopt me so he could use me a tax deduction. We spent a lot of time together!:rofl:

BTW, the reason I went after that guy is because he attacked the op, blaming her and her family for the financial problems they were having, calling them too stupid to manage money, have credit, etc. I feel the need to water board those people with sarcasm. It got so bad, she decided to leave DU.

[NMDemDist2]

45. watch for the DUzys every Friday and to read the past ones, check JeffR's journal

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x4108490


you don't know the half of it :rofl:

you may also find our DU Glossary both informative and amusing

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_oet&address=358x190

[DS1]

47. You'll need to purchase a subscription to the Offcial Lounge Magazine

yay - I'm shameless like that

[dawgmom]

48. Does it arrive in a plain brown wrapper? (NT)

[mainegreen]

52. It comes wrapped in soggy Nighttrain labels glued together

with a complementary bag of peanuts.

[sarge43]

50. You also have to memorize all the buzz phrases from movies

such as Office Space, Blazing Saddles, The Big Lebowski, Animal House, Young Frankenstein, Airplane! and so forth. Further, you must know in detail the plot, dialog, all major and minor characters and the actors portraying them, important crew members and the sordid personal history of the director of at least one obscure foreign film, preferably from an obscure nation. Then you beat the Lounge into suicidal submission with this knowledge.

[dawgmom]

51. How about Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

I've nearly committed that to memory. Does that make me obnoxious enough?

[sarge43]

53. Yes that will do nicely. MP&HG is one of Lounge's faves.

However, you're not eligible for full obnoxious without the obscure foreign flick. Get back to us on that one.