It looks like there will be lay-offs at work.

[ThomCat]

There are 5 of us, plus the boss. My job is secure because I don't have anyone backing me up. The other people have someone else who does the same job, so two people could be pared down to one.

BUT, I'm doing something that is probably really stupid. I'm putting myself on the chopping block.

I could/should be out on disability. I'm only still working because my boss bends a lot of rules to make it possible for me to keep working. (Things like flexible hours so I'm never technically late even though I'm late every day, and unlimited sick days.) To be honest, it's getting to the point where it's getting too painful and exhausting to keep working even with special rules. So I've told my boss that I would be willing to be the first one let go so that if only one job has to be cut then nobody else is at risk.

I could train someone to do my job. Nobody else wants to learn it because it's less technical and more business than what they do. But if it's a choice of learning my job or get fired someone will learn my job.

I've been working my ass of as best as I can to keep working. I don't want to stop working. But I don't think I really have much choice anymore. It's time to file for disability.

I feel like I'm doing something really, really stupid. :(

[Dangerously Amused]

1. Oh, Thom.

[ThomCat]

4. That is a very cool hug!

:loveya:

:hug:

[flvegan]

2. Do what's best for YOU, Thom.

No need to throw yourself on a sword, but if you really think that a move towards disability would be best for you, then do it. You're deserving,

My best to you.

[ThomCat]

6. I'm trying desperately to find a way to get through this without

feeling like I'm giving up.

I'm trying to turn this into something positive, and I still feel like I'm giving up.

I will do what I have to do and I'll live with it, even if I hate myself for it, I guess.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. My dear ThomCat...

Oh, sweetie...

You are not doing something really really stupid...

You are helping to save both yourself, and someone who desperately needs a job...

But do this only if you really think it's your best move...

I will support you, and love you, no matter what you do...

My respect for you knows no bounds!

:hug: :loveya: :hug:

[ThomCat]

7. Thank you.

:hug:

It is one thing after another recently and I really don't feel like I know what I'm doing. That's a really uncomfortable feeling. I'm hoping I am doing the right thing. I'm trying to convince myself. I hope it's working. :)

[VenusRising]

5. What a confusing position to be in.

I am completely impressed by your selflessness.

As long as you are doing what is ultimately best for you, then it's not a stupid decision. I applaud you.

Hang in there, babe. :hug::loveya:

[ThomCat]

8. It's totally selfish.

If I have to go out on disability anyway then it costs me nothing to to time this so that it helps someone else. On the other hand, it makes me feel much better about myself for walking away from my job. I am absolutely doing this to protect my one bruised ego.

:shrug:

But it would still be nice if this helps a coworker. I know the guy who would probably be the one to get the axe otherwise.

:hug:

I hope you are well. I miss you.

[bertha katzenengel]

22. "It's totally selfish." -- I disagree!

Just because you have an alternative that's not unpalatable does not mean that your decision to put yourself "on the chopping block" is selfish. You've said you want to keep working. By putting yourself in this position, you've not only made it possible for someone else's job to be saved, but you're releasing your boss from the special accommodations s/he's (?) made for you, which I'm sure he'd appreciate. There are a lot more reasons why what you're doing isn't selfish.

I know you're not doing it to say, "hey, look at what a great guy I am." I know that's the last thing on your mind. But that doesn't make you selfish.

I just wish I could do something for you. Bake you cookies or wash your car. I dunno.

:hug:

[Zuiderelle]

23. I agree. And I'd like to clean his kitchen.

And wash his windows. I draw the line at the bathroom though. I hate cleaning bathrooms.


Love you Thomcat! :loveya:

[ThomCat]

27. If you were nearby

I would happy accept your help on the one condition that I get to spend some time just sitting and hanging out with you before and after and just talk over either coffee or tea. :hug:

I love you too, PelosiFan! :loveya:

[ThomCat]

26. Thank you.

:hug:

I have a couple of friends who have named themselves my "house elves." One of them is coming over today to help me with stuff around the house, and another one baked me some muffins yesterday. :)

These kinds of friends are quite seriously saving my life. :loveya:

There is a small cafe in my neiborhood, and I have become friends with owner. She is trying to find more vegan recipies, and she has promised to deliver food to whatever hospital I end up in next time I need to get admitted for any reason.

Your generous sentiment is very powerful and means a whole lot. :hug:

[Tuesday Afternoon]

9. Thom,

:hug: I think it is a very practical and altruistic way to look at it. You are facing life head on and taking it in stride. You are living life on your terms and you are brave. :yourock:

[ThomCat]

10. Thank you.

I really don't mind getting a pat on the back right now. I feel like I'm about to step off a ledge. I might as well feel good about doing it, I guess. :P

Not working is really, truly going to suck. :(

[Tuesday Afternoon]

11. You will find things to do...I am sure of it...maybe there is a book

in there somewhere, maybe volunteer work on a schedule that your body can tolerate...the possibilities are endless if you keep an open mind and a joyful heart (not always easy to do, I know). Peace~TA

[lizziegrace]

12. Hey sweetheart...

:hug:

I'm constantly amazed (although by now I shouldn't be) at the depth of your compassion and humanity. This sounds like a win/win of sorts, since you've gotten to the point that work is becoming more and more difficult.

:hug:

Love you Thom. :loveya:

[ThomCat]

14. Hey right back!

:hug:

I haven't talked to you in a while. I really need to talk to you for an evening. :loveya:

I would call you, but my home phone is locked in the apartment I'm temporarily not living in. (Did I tell you that my apartment is being dug up so I got moved out for 4 weeks?) I can't hold on to the blackberry for more than a few minutes without pain, so that means only short calls until I rescue my land-line.

I will try to rescue that this weekend so I can call you. Be well until then. :hug:

[lizziegrace]

16. I'm around all weekend

call when you can.

:loveya:

[Maccagirl]

13. This world needs more people like you Thomcat.

I'm in awe of you.

[ThomCat]

15. There are a lot of fantastic, wonderful people.

I owe a lot of wonderful people far more than I can ever repay. I am deep in dept to people for all the help I've needed and received. If I do anything that helps someone I'm just paying it forward. :)

The lounge is full of many of those wonderful people. :loveya:

Thank you very much for that complement though. That is very awesome of you to say. :hug:

[RFKHumphreyObama]

17. I truly hope Obama gets to the White House

It would be great to have someone with the same characteristics and qualities as you do in office. We need more people like you

[ThomCat]

18. Wow! That's cool to be compared to our next president.

:7

Thank you very much! :hug:

I used to be a volunteer activist. I would have loved it if I had been able to afford to take a job as a community activist. But debt forced me to take a corporate job to stay above water. Otherwise I might have been at least more in Obama's sphere, if not anywhere in his league. :P

[Lil Missy]

19. Don't be in a rush. It takes several months to get a disability approval.

I got approved on the first round, but it took forever.

[ThomCat]

20. I'm definitely planning on it taking a while.

That's why I've been trying to hard to prepare, and why I'm so worried about it.

I know that I'll almost certainly get approved in the first review too. My medical records are very thorough and go back years. My doctors will support me 100%. But it could still end up taking over a year, possibly two before I get approved.

I have been in no hurry to get sucked into any kind of slow, backlogged bureaucracy. :(

[Callalily]

21. You are a very brave

and caring person, and totally admired not only by me, but many, many others.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[ThomCat]

28. Hi SF!

:hug:

I've openly admitted that I'm terrified of applying for disability, not having a job, being isolated at home with no reason to get up in the morning. I really don't feel very brave. I just fake it with stubbornness. :P

[Bunny]

24. Thom, you are such a wonderful person. The co-worker who gets spared the axe will be so grateful.

FWIW, I think you are doing the right thing for yourself and your health. I've followed your medical issues here, and I've often wondered how you manage to keep going. You have a deep well of strenght to draw from, but I think you've earned a rest. Going on disability does not mean the end of productive living, but I'm sure you know that. You can still earn money, perhaps as a consultant or something. I wish you all the best. :grouphug:

[ThomCat]

29. Hi Bunny! The thing is,

I'm a consultant now. That's what I'm giving up and leaving behind.

I've asked around for ways within the consulting field to work part time, or to work from home, or work off the books. Off the book jobs don't seem to exist, and if I could handle the other offers I would be able to handle just staying where I am and not going on disability to begin with. So no luck yet.

Consulting is a kit like temping, with a higher skill set and more valuable expertise. Hopefully I will find some occasional work that I can schedule irregularly, that I can do off the books. That would be ideal. But it's terribly likely.

:shrug:

At some point I imagine I'll find a few weeks to enjoy being able to rest and sleep and take naps. :)

After that I'll need to find someplace to volunteer.

[TZ]

25. Oh Thom...

Thats really wonderful of you..Maybe you can find a job that allows you to work from home?:hug:

[ThomCat]

30. That seems like the holy grail.

"Earn good money working part time from home!"

:P

I'll have to look into some of those to see if any of them are actually legitimate and are any better than sub-minimum wage scams.

:hug:

[TZ]

31. I was actually thinking about employers that allow telecommuting...

Down here more and more companies are letting their employees work from home several days a week...because of traffic and the fact that even the public transportation here is getting overloaded..Maybe you could get a job where you were home 3 days a week...

[ThomCat]

32. That is a definitely possiblity

If I can find a career niche. With this big economic crash, hopefully more companies will realize that telecommuting is cheaper than physically placing employees in the office.

But if real estate values keep crashing, and office space become cheap and readily available then we'll see telecommuting opportunities crash too.