Single People: How soon do you start telling the person

[Tuesday Afternoon]

you are dating about their faults and why? Are they deal breaking faults or just irritating quirks? Or is it just the plain fact that no one is perfect?

eta: How do you handle the conversation? What about the other way around -- if and when did the person you are dating start pointing out your faults and/or idiosyncrasies?

[ThomCat]

1. Do you really need to tell him/her?

Usually people already know. It's more a matter of kindly discussing acceptable behavior when you're together than labeling faults.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

4. not me.

I am not dating anyone. I have had it happen to me back when I was dating...kind of sucked. Just wondering if it has ever happened to anyone else and how did they handle it?

[undeterred]

2. If you're interested in someone, and you bring out

a list of their faults, that will drive them away. If you're not interested, why bother?

[Tuesday Afternoon]

5. that was my thought as well.

we quit dating soon after the conversation.

[LeftyMom]

3. Uh, if you immediately want to change somebody, you probably shouldn't date them.

Or at least shouldn't have any expectation that the relationship will go anywhere.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

6. uh...this happened to me...

and yeah, we broke up.

[LeftyMom]

7. Probably for the best then.

That person either had issues or was just a douche. Sorry, but at least you found out before you were too far into the relationship.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

9. yes. He was a douchebag of assorted issues.

That did it for me. It is the weirdest feeling. I am done with it. I want to be alone, except for family. No more dating for me. It is just not worth it.

[Radical Activist]

14. I'm amazed at how may

women (I say women because that's the only gender I have experience dating) have the attitude that their role in life is to passive-aggressively change whoever they're dating into what they really want. I've had a few short relationships end quickly when I realized she took that approach to relationships.

[Orrex]

8. I find that an explanatory limerick is usually the best way to go

For instance:

I'm so glad that we happened to meet.
You're romantic and clever and sweet,
But I'll kick your ass out
Without even a shout
If you continue to piss on the seat.



Something like that.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

10. cute.

:) :hi:

[Orrex]

11. Glad I can help!

Feel free to use that one whenever you need it, even without attribution.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

12. it was the other way around...

I have no need for it but, thanks for offering. I am done.

[Orrex]

13. Well, next time make sure to lift the lid

Just kidding, of course.

From what I've read here, it sounds like you're better off.

:hug: