"My parents did the best they could." You hear that sometimes reading

[raccoon]

essays, memories, etc., of adult children of alcoholics or other similarly dysfunctional families.

Maybe that's true for most people. But I definitely don't think ALL parents did the best they could.

You might as well say ALL ex-boyfriends/girlfriends did the best they could. It just ain't so.

[tigereye]

1. well, I think some denial is included in that, and also the realization that

past generations tended to ignore alcoholism and mental health problems and not think of them as treatable... I think it takes a lot of insight or intervention for people to realize how serious the problems actually are. Also children don't always know why something is wrong, they just know that something is.


just my 2 cents..

[Orsino]

2. It's often used in the context of things out of one's control.

In tough economic conditions, particularly. And when there's not a lot one can do, it may usually true that one does the best one can.

[david13]

3. It just ain't so. They could have done better, any of those in those

situations could have done better. It's an excuse, it's a forgiveness, it's a denial of the wrong of it, all that.
But they didn't do better.
So there has to be an acceptance to it, and frequently these are people that still don't want to accept it, that it happened, that it was that bad. That it should have been different and better.
dc