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it was a dark and stormy nite... i had ridden my Bianche Team Issue out to my friends house in the country for a gathering of friends... there were severe thunder storms and it was late.. they told me to stay in the living room on a couch for the nite.. it was unusually low to floor but comfortable... about 3:30am i heard a doors rusty hinge creaking as the heavy door hesitantly opened... a shaply, lithe figure sensously glided like smoke across the darkened room....i thought, "i'm gona get lucky!" ...it was Hellen, a gosamer apparition in the inky darkness of a moonless stormy night.. she stopped and slowly reached out and touched.....the thermostat, and turned up the heat....turned and glided back to her room and shut the door, alone. i thought that strange..the heater was in the living room floor, no central heat, and she shut her door. i didnt think about that again,...untill,..I awoke suddenly in a blinding dizzy fit of nausia, i knew that i wasnt going to make it to the bath room so i turned to vomit on the floor, thinking it would be easier to clean up than the couch. but, only my head turned and fell against the cusion of the couch. i was really concerned about the mess i was going to have to clean up if didnt get up... then it dawned on me ....i was paralized!! i couldnt get up.. i after a brief wave of panic i stopped to acess my situation, i was paralized and couldnt even call for help...Hmmm? why couldnt i call for help? well for one thing i wasnt BREATHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it came to me like a bat to the head. we had discussed having headaches earlier.. someone had set the mica top on the heater ajar to increase the heat output..and the monoxide!! "they say you always wake up 4 minutes before you die and cant move" came roaring back... a Blissful wave of calm washed over me, "well, it took 2 minutes to figure this out, so in 2 more minutes i wont have another care in this world...." it was like i was shot out of a cannon and quickly excellerated to light speed down a tunnel..i was really into the grove of the bliss and ...a voice like a bell..that i was to hear again 10 years later, said, "NO, not now", i was definately not happy about comming back!! it was like being bitch slapped out of a wet dream about Hellen. comming back was harsh, but i was able to arch my neck back.. and felt a cold draft from a window up in the good air, it was falling down gently onto my forehead. it took every milligram of will and energy to force the first feable breath, but i felt it like hot lava flow down my arms and legs, well i survived to wake up the house and express my displeasure and to be here today and yesterday. it was a real lesson... Death is not to fear, being a Buddhist as i get older and experience more daily pain and discomfort as this body wears out.. i look foward to one aspect of rebirth..getting a new body at least, this one has served me well, but now some of the bearings are a bit worn.
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