BREAKING: God Endorses Barack Obama.

[rateyes]

SOURCE: James Dobson, Focus on the Family

A few weeks ago, when the Obama campaign announced that Barack Obama would make his acceptance speech at Invesco Field in Denver, Colorado before a crowd of nearly 80,000 people, James Dobson's "Focus on the Family" organization called upon all born-again Christians to pray to God for rain of biblical proportions to fall in Denver on August 28 to ruin the event.

Stuart Shepard, a spokesperson for "Focus" urged Christians world wide to implore of God for "abundant rain, torrential rain ... flood-advisory rain." He added, "I'm talking about umbrella-ain't-gonna-help-you rain ... swamp-the-intersections rain."

The forecast for Denver tonight, August 28, 2008 is for clear skies, a temperature of 72 degrees Fahreinheit, and a gentle breeze of 9 mph---in other words, perfect weather for an outdoor event.

Meanwhile, next week, during the Republican National Convention that will nominate John McCain as the Republican standard-bearer, weather forecasters are predicting a Category 3 hurricane making landfall on the Louisiana coast---a grim reminder of the Republican inaction that left thousands of citizens stranded for days after Hurricane Katrina.

Focus on the Family president and CEO James Dobson, asked for comment on this story said, "While we certainly regret the coming devastation that is awaiting, once again, the people of Louisiana and the rest of the Gulf coast, we cannot argue with God's will. The fact that our petition for rain in Denver tonight has been denied by the Almighty, and that, in fact, the weather will be perfect for Senator Obama's acceptance speech, together with the news that the approaching hurricane will make landfall during the Republican Convention, we have no choice but to declare that God, in his divine wisdom, has chosen to endorse Senator Obama. We don't understand the mysterious ways of God, but as born-again Christians, we must obey. Therefore, I am calling upon all Christians to answer the clear call of the Almighty, and cast your vote for Senator Obama."

Dobson also called upon Senator McCain to accept the divine will of God, and reject his party's nomination next week in Minneapolis.

--------------------------------------------

***This news report was written by Rateyes, a journalist with impeccable credentials, and blogger at democraticunderground.com.

[grannie4peace]

1. i believe it!

obama's goals are consistent with Jesus' requests to his followers

[rateyes]

2. ...

:hi:

[thunder rising]

5. LOL We're not talking about Obama here. Dobson is a psycho killer white Christian.

[grannie4peace]

12. sorry- thought we were talking about the storm not going to denver

[thunder rising]

19. my sarcasm can be a little dry sometimes.

[WeDidIt]

3. That's some Onion Worthy shit right there! n/t

[rateyes]

4. Thank you.

I know others that would call it "shit," too. :hi:

[Labors of Hercules]

6. FANTASTIC!!!!

Off to the greatest page with ye!!! :applause:

[Patiod]

7. Yeah, them prayers got die-verted

Hoping that the people of the Gulf will be okay, but at the same time wallowing in schaudenfreude in terms of the timing of the storms.

[rateyes]

9. Yeah. I sure do hope that the hurricane breaks up and

the gulf coast remains safe. But, can't help the schadenfreude.

[WeDidIt]

17. Here's my perfect scenario

It moves into the middle of the Gulf and becomes a category 5 Sunday night

All day Monday, it kinda moves around in circles in the Gulf as a Category 5. Prediction models have it hitting Florida on Wednesday

Same thing Tuesday Prediction models put it hitting New Orleans on Thursday night as a Category 5 at 9 PM.

Wednesday it makes it's move directly to NEw Orleans, though it slows a bit and predictions have it making landfall very early Friday Morning.

Thursday night there is a split screen Of John McCain acceptjning the nomination and the radard of Gustav bearing down on New Orleans.

After McCains's speech, Gustav begins weakneing. Byt the time it makes landfall it's been downgraded to a tropical depression.

[rateyes]

21. The weather ruining McCain's acceptance speech, after the

fundie's prayers for rain to ruin Obama's is just classic. Here's to hoping for a downgrade in that storm. :toast:

[Voice for Peace]

28. how about it skips the coast altogether and zooms up to minnesota

[Dem_4_Life]

8. LOL! I love it!!! nt

[meow2u3]

10. "Focus" Christians don't have much Christ in them

Those right-wing fundies give Christianity and Christians a bad name. Real Christians don't pray to God to hurt others. Only people with hatred in their lost souls do that.

[ThatsMyBarack]

11. There's a gospel song in there....

Something like "Jesus Loves Obama" or "God Loves Obama". HAAAALLEEELUJAHHHH!!!!! Amen. :loveya: :patriot:

[rateyes]

Sung to the tune of "Amazing Grace!"

Can I get an "amen?"

[ThatsMyBarack]

16. AaaayyyyyMEN!

:patriot:

[rateyes]

18. I cant' hear you!!!

:hi:

[ThatsMyBarack]

30. Wait a sec....ahem....

AYYYYYYYY............MEN!!!! :patriot:

[rateyes]

32. Now, THAT'S what I'm talking about!!!

:yourock:

[stevedeshazer]

13. ...!...

:hi:

:rofl:

[rateyes]

14. ...

:hi: :toast:

[Joanne98]

15. God hates James Dobson. He's a heretic.

[blondeatlast]

20. God works in mysterious ways, indeed. Especially when he's socking it to the New Philistines

in the republican party.

Damn, he's good! :evilgrin:

[rateyes]

22. Yes, she is.

:evilgrin:

[ElboRuum]

24. Hmm...

I thought we referred to the Flying Spaghetti Monster in the pronomial as "It".

Where's my Pastafarian Hymnal when I need it.

[rateyes]

27. My bad.

:rofl:

[blondeatlast]

26. Touche'! Right you are. nt

[ElboRuum]

23. I so WANT to believe this...

That whole truth stranger than fiction angle... you understand.

Naaaaah. Much lulz in there, tho.

[underpants]

25. lol

[Egnever]

29. If Only

[Kire]

31. at first it was cute

but then I read about the hurricane coming, and now it's scary

The Saffir-Simpson Hurricane Scale is described here, for anyone who wants a reference:
http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/aboutsshs.shtml

[mile18blister]

33. What's the forecast in St. Paul next week?

Any thunderstorms or tornadoes? I don't want any innocent people hurt, but having the electricity knocked out or herding everyone into a storm shelter would provide further proof of the Almighty's will. :evilgrin:

[rateyes]

36. I was going to make a remark about a bridge,

but will forego it.

[Barack_America]

34. Seriously! I just heard his spokesperson, GUSTAV, announce it! nt

[Abacus]

35. Headline needs more zest, perhaps: Almighty Goes All 'Bama

[rateyes]

37. I like it. nt

[AspenRose]

38. God don't like ugly.

[Ian David]

39. See also:

http://tinyurl.com/GodHatesRepublicans

And now:

http://tinyurl.com/GodHatesDobson

[ChimpersMcSmirkers]

40. Assholes, pure and simple...What the fuck kind of "man of god" prays for something

bad to happen to someone...

[Ian David]

41. Republiklan Party Considers Delaying their Convention in Minneapolis due to Weather in New Orleans

Source: Washington Post

Republican officials said yesterday that they are considering delaying the start of the GOP convention in Minneapolis-St. Paul because of Tropical Storm Gustav, which is on track to hit the Gulf Coast, and possibly New Orleans, as a full-force hurricane early next week.

The threat is serious enough that White House officials are also debating whether President Bush should cancel his scheduled convention appearance on Monday, the first day of the convention, according to administration officials and others familiar with the discussion.

For Bush and Republican presidential candidate John McCain, Gustav threatens to provide an untimely reminder of Hurricane Katrina. A new major storm along the Gulf Coast would renew memories of one of the low points of the Bush administration, while pulling public attention away from McCain's formal coronation as the GOP presidential nominee.

Senior Republicans said images of political celebration in the Twin Cities while thousands of Americans flee a hurricane could be dubious. "Senator McCain has always been sensitive to national crisis," said McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds, noting that the senator postponed announcing his presidential candidacy in 2000 because of the war in the Balkans. "We are monitoring the situation very closely."


More:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x3458988

Also:
http://www.TinyUrl.com/GodReallyHatesRepublicans
http://www.TinyUrl.com/GodHatesRepublicans
http://www.TinyUrl.com/GodHatesDobson

[Ian David]

42. Republiklan Party Considers Delaying their Convention in Minneapolis due to Weather in New Orleans

Source: Washington Post

Republican officials said yesterday that they are considering delaying the start of the GOP convention in Minneapolis-St. Paul because of Tropical Storm Gustav, which is on track to hit the Gulf Coast, and possibly New Orleans, as a full-force hurricane early next week.

The threat is serious enough that White House officials are also debating whether President Bush should cancel his scheduled convention appearance on Monday, the first day of the convention, according to administration officials and others familiar with the discussion.

For Bush and Republican presidential candidate John McCain, Gustav threatens to provide an untimely reminder of Hurricane Katrina. A new major storm along the Gulf Coast would renew memories of one of the low points of the Bush administration, while pulling public attention away from McCain's formal coronation as the GOP presidential nominee.

Senior Republicans said images of political celebration in the Twin Cities while thousands of Americans flee a hurricane could be dubious. "Senator McCain has always been sensitive to national crisis," said McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds, noting that the senator postponed announcing his presidential candidacy in 2000 because of the war in the Balkans. "We are monitoring the situation very closely."


More:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x3458988

Also:
http://www.TinyUrl.com/GodReallyHatesRepublicans
http://www.TinyUrl.com/GodHatesRepublicans
http://www.TinyUrl.com/GodHatesDobson

[BlooInBloo]

43. hahahaha!

[NM Independent]

44. K&R

:rofl:

Nice one!!!

[SeattleGirl]

45. Cool!

I always thought God was a smart dude!

[sniffa]

46. His son endorsed him months ago

It's about time he got on board.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x4235844