I asked one of my gay friends if he and his partner were planning to tie the knot

[slackmaster]

He said there was no way he and his partner of 38 years could ever get married.

I had forgotten that his partner is the priest at a small Roman Catholic church. :dunce:

We had a good laugh about it.

[mrreowwr_kittty]

1. How can his partner still be a priest? What about the vow of celibacy? nt

[Warpy]

2. I think Mother Rome tends to look the other way

when the vow of chastity is broken. Look at the way they just kept pedophiles moving around instead of defrocking them and sending them packing in disgrace, turning them in to the civil authorities.

Celibacy is another matter, and refers to legal marriage. Mother Rome takes this one very seriously, as priests and bishops who make a real go of selling religion and build wealthy parishes/sees who marry would naturally leave the boodle to spouses and children, not to Mother Rome.

The twin vows of clerical celibacy and chastity are actually rather recent.

[slackmaster]

4. Gay men can be celebate, and as far as my friend goes...

...I've never asked what kind of physical relationship he and his partner have, and he's never volunteered any information.

[mrreowwr_kittty]

6. I suppose, but it still seems kind of contradictory to the priestly vow.

A commitment to another person, regardless of the presence or absence of physical intimacy, would seem to detract from one's commitment to God as a priest. I thought that was the whole point of taking the vow.

[slackmaster]

7. Can't a priest have a roommate without breaking celebacy?

How about a good friend?

[mrreowwr_kittty]

8. Not the same as a partner.

I certainly don't put my roommates and friends on the same level as my life partner.

[slackmaster]

10. I think the point I am dancing around is that the relationship is a private, personal matter

If the priest in his heart does not feel that the relationship is inconsistent with his vows, who else is better qualified to judge it?

I mean, the guy is a PRIEST. If he's not sure, he should talk to the bishop about it.

[Zuiderelle]

9. I have met two gay Catholic priests in my life.

And I know of several more. I know of several gay nuns as well. Here's a great book on the subject:

[mrreowwr_kittty]

11. Sexual orientation isn't the issue.

Being in a committed intimate relationship, gay or straight, sexual or not, while presenting a facade of celibacy and acting as the public face of a religion that dictates a VERY narrow parameter of acceptable relationships is incredibly hypocritical and dishonest. The Catholic Church espouses the view that the ONLY sexual expression sanctioned by God is within heterosexual marriage, and (generally) only for the purpose of procreation. This rigid dogma has caused untold misery to millions of people for centuries and they are helping to perpetuate it while covertly living their own lives. I seriously doubt the priest in the OP discusses his relationship from the pulpit. And while his particular parish may be very welcoming and tolerant, he is still choosing to be a part of an organized faith that denies him, and others like him, the ability to marry.

[Zuiderelle]

12. As many gay Christians choose to be part of churches that don't accept our orientation,

I don't see how it's any different. Hopefully the rigid dogma will eventually loosen for priests and parishioners alike.

Perhaps they find that helping people in the role of a priest and making change from within is more important than living openly and losing any influence they have at all.

I, for one, don't judge them for this.

[Ian David]

3. I'd find a new religion. Unitarians and United Church of Christ are very nice.

Unfortunately, he wouldn't be eligible to join the religion that I'm starting. I call it HotChickOlogy. Only hot chicks are allowed to join.

So far, not even my wife will join, since she refuses to adhere to ANY of the core principals.

Sigh.

[slackmaster]

5. These two men really don't care that they can't marry

They are in a happy, stable relationship. They're leaving this morning for a three-week road trip to Idaho for a family reunion.