18th child on the way

[YankeyMCC]

I saw this in the Lounge and curiosity led me to the FAQ on the family's web site where I saw this at the top of the page:

"How do you make a household of 17 people run smoothly? What is a typical day in your lives?


Our #1 goal is to lead our children to seek a close relationship with God & give Him every area of their lives."

I guess if you have 18 children you the same tools leaders and governments use to control large populations come in handy.

Get everyone to pray to the same gods and use that to impose standard set of rules and sense of unity.

[charlie]

1. That bunch are the inspiration

for my favorite motivational poster parody:

[progressoid]

2. Bwaaa!

:spray:

That's a keeper!

[Auggie]

3. Amazing!

Mom and Dad stopped screwing long enough to take a family portrait.

[WillParkinson]

4. OMFSM...

That's TOO funny.

[progdonkey]

7. did you see their "special" on TLC?

It's great for its snark-worthiness. The kids are all home-schooled, and I think it's all by the mom, who has about a third-grade education (and that's being charitable). One of my favorite parts is when they're putting up some wooden posts or something, and she asks the kids, "Now, what do we call that? Perpendicular, that's right; straight up and down." Because, vertical and perpendicular are the same thing, right? (She probably also teaches them that north is "up," because that's how it looks on them there wall maps.)

There's another poster of them where most of the children (and the mother as well, I think) have skull-and-crossbones over their faces, with different diseases listed--the point being that, if the world were still run according to their freaky fundamentalist/anti-science religious beliefs, most of the children would've already died of smallpox, malnutrition, etc. Similarly with the McCoughey(sp?) septuplets, where they were only able to have children because the mom got loaded with fertility drugs after years of failing naturally. According to them, though, it was a "miracle from God." God clearly didn't want them to have any kids, let alone seven at once!

[funflower]

9. Didn't that guy run for Congress from Mississippi or something? n/t

[Hoooweee]

5. the fark discussion board on this one was golden

The best line had to be "if they'd all been girls, she could have sired a golf course." Someone replied, "nah, she'd just need 9 girls. You get to hit the front nine, then the back nine."

[NMMNG]

6. As my SO has said before,

"That's not a family, that's a litter."

[frogmarch]

8. Clown Cars

http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/Bigger_20Clown_20Cars

For fun, in this snip replace "car" and "clown car" and "models" with "vagina," and "clowns" and "performer" with "kids." (Make other word substitutions to suit one's own particular fancy.)

~~

I remember a time when you could go to the circus confident that you would at some point be treated to the sight of that tiny gaily painted car wobbling into the center ring to deliver its unbelievable passenger load of twelve, maybe fifteen tumbling clowns. Not so today. Seven perhaps. Nine tops. This is not good entertainment. A new element needs to be introduced to preserve the routine at its best for the audiences of tomorrow.

Whimsically decorated showroom models will not do. The classic clown car configuration (that of the wee puffy station wagon) is key to the comical effect.

Clown cars of the future should be scaled-up at least 3% overall and engineered with the goal of maximum performer containment in mind. Additionally, eschewing the non-essentials is a must, i.e. radio knobs and sun visors. And, certainly, a steering wheel larger than a dinner roll would be totally unnecessary.

It seems such an easy problem to solve.

~~

Okay, I'll admit it...I'm sick. I apologize in advance.