Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

There are times I feel that I don't deserve to be happy.

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
Home » Discuss » DU Groups » Health & Disability » Mental Health Support Group Donate to DU
 
terrya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jul-23-08 06:00 PM
Original message
There are times I feel that I don't deserve to be happy.
I'm going through that right now.

Am I the only one who feels like this?

Thanks.
Refresh | 0 Recommendations Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jul-23-08 08:16 PM
Response to Original message
1. I feel like that every morning from about 4 to 6.
It wakes me up and then I have to spend some time stopping those thoughts.

When you think about it, who have you ever met that didn't deserve to be happy? It's an obvious stunt our brain pulls on us.

((((((((((terrya)))))))))))

You sure aren't alone. Not at all.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
terrya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-24-08 05:31 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. Thank you again.
I can't get rid of these thoughts. I'm in the mindset now where I think it's my lot in life to be miserable and unhappy and it's not going to get any better. Everyone else can be happy and I can't. Therefore, I don't deserve it.

I'll try to get past this. Thank you, sfexpat2000.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
DemExpat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-24-08 07:12 AM
Response to Original message
3. terrya, give this a try, nothing to lose, and is harmless.
http://www.amazon.com/review/product/1561705322/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?%5Fencoding=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

Self-esteem affirmations.

And remember, almost ALL people who need these affirmations think they are ridiculous, or pathetic, or laughable when they first start doing them. They are difficult adn off-putting because our minds reject the messages.
But the more you listen to them, or write them down, which I did in really low times, the more acceptable and accepted they are!

I stopped one major panic attack on a city bus once years ago by simply saying to myself that I had the right to be riding this bus, to be comfortable and relaxed riding this bus like everyone else......something like that. It - amazingly to me - stopped the rising full-blown panic in its tracks. Like taking a pill, only better.

If you don't like this author then look for other affirmations on Google, on Amazon, or in your library.

Sometimes some of us need this tool to RE-WIRE our thoughts that have gotten into difficult patterns of negativity.

:hug:

DemEx

Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
mopinko Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-24-08 10:13 AM
Response to Original message
4. have more sex.
sorry, that is just the first thing to pop into my mind.
i think it happens to us all. i had a pretty hard first half of my life, and i am trying to get my brains to get caught up now that things are pretty smooth.
(((((((terrya))))))))) whatever your stuck thought process is telling you, you do deserve to be happy.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
qb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jul-24-08 02:15 PM
Response to Original message
5. Unconditional self-acceptance is another approach.
In spite of whatever you're feeling...
In spite of anything you've done...
You are worthy of happiness.

Perhaps you have some behaviors and attitudes that need improvement (we all do), but they are not part of your identity. They are only behaviors and attitudes and should have no bearing on your self-worth.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-25-08 11:39 AM
Response to Original message
6. No, I get that too.
Edited on Fri Jul-25-08 11:39 AM by redqueen
I've had a much harder time fighting those irrational thoughts lately... I hope it gets easier for both of us.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
terrya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-25-08 07:44 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. I do, too.
We both deserve to be happy, redqueen. We have to push thoughts out.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jul-25-08 08:44 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. It's so hard sometimes.
I'll feel fine for a while, and then something will happen, and then it's back in the dumps.

I guess it just takes practice.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
mdmc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-04-08 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
9. I have to say that I'm kinda past that now.
I used to be terribly depressed. Recently I recovered from RA. I feel like a got a second chance at life.

(imho) God is in charge. He can make me suffer or make me happy. If God wills it, I will be happy.

To be catholic and irish is to know that the world will break your heart.

My heart is broken. Yet, I am happy.
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
Mojambo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-04-08 09:17 PM
Response to Original message
10. I think I can make a pretty good argument that I don't deserve to be happy.
I'm so unhappy and aimless, and yet I'm still so unmotivated and paralyzed into inaction. I feel so pathetic and angry with myself, but never, it seems, enough to DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT.

I know that I'm responsible for where I'm at in my life and I know that the only way anything is going to change is if I make an effort to change it. And still I do nothing. I don't know if I'm too lazy to try or if I've literally forgotten how to.

Can you forget how to live? Is it possible that the thought of doing even simple things can be so fraught with anxiety and fear that I've tricked myself into an ironclad belief that they are impossible? Or am I truly as pathetically lazy as I feel?

If it's the latter, and I'm not convinced that it isn't, then I really don't deserve to be happy.

I just want out. Living feels like too much. The thought of tomorrow, next week, next month, next year... I'm most definitely not suicidal (that would require initiative that has long since left me), but I do often fantasize about car accidents or exotic diseases... Noble escapes from the endless obligations life demands.

Does a person who feels this way about life deserve to be happy?
Printer Friendly | Permalink | Reply | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Mon May 06th 2024, 05:19 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » DU Groups » Health & Disability » Mental Health Support Group Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC