Is this a passed around story? Need proff and a link if it is.

[Kerrytravelers]

My daughter was diagnosed by 4 different physicians (a radiologist, a maternal-fetal specialist, a neurosurgeon, and a geneticist) at 24w gestation with a severe birth defect which would result in either death at birth or shortly thereafter, or -- best(?) case scenario -- life as a vegatable. We were referred to a late-term abortionist in Wichita, KS and told 'nobody will judge you.'

We declined the abortion. We went home. We wept. We prayed. We were terrified. At times, we felt we could trust that God would give us the strength and grace we and our daughter needed, whatever the outcome, but there were times when we asked 'why?' and when we felt totally abandoned... Sometimes you just can't pray anymore, you just can't dare to hope. It was a very long 16 weeks. I remember the sense of longing for her that -- whatever else might be wrong -- she would have such a capacity to feel the love that we had for her. It made me realize that ultimately, the ability to share love with one another is what is truly defines our lives. Her life, however different it might be from ours, would have meaning if she could receive love.

My daughter was born via cesarean, in the hopes that avoiding head trauma during birth would not further damage what brain capacity she might have left. When we heard her take that first breath, that first cry -- even before she was totally out of my womb! -- my husband began to sob with relief. She did have a large mass on her neck, but it was NOT a herniation of the brain, as both a CT scan and MRI proved. Her brain was perfectly normal -- not protruding outside her skull and filled with fluid. What happened to the hole in her skull they visualized during my numberous ultraound scans remains unknown.

And so, the neurosurgeon bid us farewell and the pediatric surgeon entered the scene. His diagnosis: aggressive in-utero cancer requiring immediate removal and biopsy. So, day 2, she was sedated again and underwent a 3 hour surgery to remove the tumor, which was wrapped around her vocal chords, her neck muscles, and everything else in that region. And while we were thankful that her brain was normal and she was recovering well from surgery, now we waited again for the lab reports to come back while my oncologist-husband began researching infant cancer treatments. Thank God, none of that was needed, as the tumor was benign! A totally random, highly unlikely thing. About a 1/30,000 chance of this type of tumor occuring without serious fetal deformities, some of which are incompatible with life.

I know that our case is the exception, and I don't share this in order to say "the doctors could be wrong, so I wouldn't terminate." I understand, I truly understand the anguish of being told that your baby cannot live outside your womb. I don't think it's an easy decision, and there were times when I questioned whether we had done the right thing. I do understand wanting to spare a baby the suffering of death (although I think by the time these types of things are discovered, there is likely suffering in utero during an abortion procedure as well). What worried me the most was that she would not die quickly, but would linger in a vegatative state, in pain, and we would face withdrawal-of-care issues I don't even want to think about.

My daughter is now 6 years old, going into 1st grade. She reads (a little), annoys her older brothers, wants to grow her hair like kindergarten teacher's hair was, and has asked for a kitten for her birthday. She has a scar on her neck from her surgery and a little scar below from the drainage tube. Otherwise, perfect in every way. She looks just like my husband -- although I take some solace in a comment made by a gal at church: "That baby looks just like her daddy... but she gets that twinkle in her eye from her mama."

_________________________________________________________________________________

If this is simply a cut ans paste job, then I need to let other people on the message board (not DU) know because this person if going for sumpathy. If it's true, then I don't want to say anything.

[mzteris]

1. where'd you get it?

Can you back track or backlink?

[Kerrytravelers]

7. No link was given. It was presented as a true story.

[jobycom]

2. Don't see it on Scopes. Is someone claiming it happened to them?

It reads more like a true story than most of the "I defied the doctors and God rewarded me" stories. The writer doesn't preach, just mentions praying, and she has sympathy for people who make other decisions.

Wonderful things really do happen to people, and there are plenty of true "My doctors are idiot" stories out there. It's a touching story. If it's true, I'm happy to hear it, and happy for the family. If it's not true, I'm sure there are real stories very similar. And real stories that started the same and had very tragic endings.

[Kerrytravelers]

8. Someone is claiming this happened to them.

They may be honest. I don't know. I just wanted to be sure in case this was a reich-wing bullshit story. It's a baby naming site, so lots of mothers or wanna-be moms (like me) there. 98% are liberal, but there are a few rethugs there... but amazingly enough, they keep their political opinions pretty much to themselves!

[mzteris]

11. It sounds made up to me.

Too "pat" if you know what I mean.

IF it's true, great - but I'm highly doubtful.

[Ilsa]

3. Of it is true, then patients and would-be parents are in a terrible bind.

They are basically being told to question everything bad their docs tell them. Who would question good news except for someone with a strong intuitive sense about something that "isn't quite right"? There is nothing wrong in questioning or getting multiple opinions, but at some point you have to make a decision.

[Warpy]

9. Parents and physicians are always in a terrible bind

when something like this is discovered late in pregnancy. There's always a question of whether or not the ultrasound is allowing sufficient visualization of the problem. Most of the time, it is.

The scenario in this post is entirely possible. The parents made the right decision, but it could easily have gone the other way, something the writer freely aknowledges, resulting in a short life full of agony and battles to withdraw life support.

The only inaccuracy was calling it a UTERINE cancer. It was not. It was most likely a teratoma, by my humble guess.

[rosesaylavee]

4. Did you try Snopes? n/t

[Kerrytravelers]

6. Didn't see it there- but there are some great researchers here on DU.

[johnaries]

5. Checking Snopes, but I do know one thing,

the tumor couldn't have been "wrapped around her vocal chords". For one thing, they are not chords but folds in the air passageway. And if the tumor was wrapped around her air passageway, there's very little chance she would have been able to cry - still in the womb or out of the womb.

Smells very fishy to me.

[Cerridwen]

10. I believe this is a variation of a right-wing "testimony" to show the

"dangers" of late-term abortions used frequently to fight choice issues. It's an urban legend which, to date, no one has come forth to prove or deny. Some young girl is currently using this to "testify" in evangelical anti-choice churches to warn of the "dangers" of abortion.

It's been around for a while and has recently been "re-incarnated" for the debate.

Give me a second and I'll find a link for a true and documented story of a woman faced with an abortion late in her pregnancy. It has a bittersweet and factual ending.

Here it is, I found the link:

http://www.boston.com/news/globe/magazine/articles/2004/01/25/my_late_term_abortion/

<snip>

Instead of cinnamon and spice, our child came with technical terms like hydrocephalus and spina bifida. The spine, she said, had not closed properly, and because of the location of the opening, it was as bad as it got. What they knew -- that the baby would certainly be paralyzed and incontinent, that the baby's brain was being tugged against the opening in the base of the skull and the cranium was full of fluid -- was awful. What they didn't know -- whether the baby would live at all, and if so, with what sort of mental and developmental defects -- was devastating. Countless surgeries would be required if the baby did live. None of them would repair the damage that was already done.

<snip>

I wrote my doctor a long thank-you note on my good, wedding stationery. I thanked him for his compassion and his kindness. I wrote that it must be hard, what he does, but that I hoped he found consolation in the fact that he was helping vulnerable women in their most vulnerable of times. He keeps my note, along with all the others he's received, in a large bundle. And he keeps that bundle right next to his stack of hate mail. They are about the same size.

<much more at link>