*** DUzy Awards for week ending July 18, 2008 ***

JeffR

(1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore

Fri Jul-18-08 05:14 PM
Original message

Welcome to the 4'10", 300-pound DUzy Awards, a compendium of star-spangled amusement from this week on DU. Congratulations to this week's winners!

The DUzy Awards will be announced every Friday, if I get around to it. Previous awards can be found in my journal.
Note to Mods: Skinner has authorized the DUzy Awards to be posted in GD.

Special thanks to SOteric, Gilligan, krispos42, Peake, annabanana, CaliforniaPeggy, devilgrrl, kgfnally, AZDemDist6, MrCoffee, hootinholler, 48percenter, babylonsister, stellanoir, JVS, scarletwoman, Richardo, tavalon, swampg8r, DinahMoeHum, gateley, KitchenWitch, wryter2000 and NanceGreggs for their invaluable assistance with this edition.

Where have you gone, Kurovski? A nation turns its lonely eyes to you, DU DU DU...

OP by Median Democrat:

The Downside Of An Obama Presidency...
Landfills throughout the D.C. area will be hit hard due to amount of shredded documents generated in the closing days of the Bush presidency. Likewise, the demagnitization of the massive amounts of White House electronic media could very well have a deleterious effect. Perhaps we should have a NEPA study of the environmental impact of an Obama victory and the subsequent mass document destruction by the Bush administration.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25640768

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18927300

I guess McCain could tout this as an environmental reason for voting for him!

:rofl:

GDP, July 11, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6487596

OP by LaStrega:

McCain can really sing!
Ah, ba ba ba ba bomb Iran

Ba ba ba ba bomb Iran

Oh bomb Iran, I think we can

Bomb Iran

We�ll have �em rockin� and a-rollin�

Rockin� and a-reelin�

Bomb Iran bomb bomb

Went to Iraq, lookin� for some oil

Worked out so good so let�s give Iran a whirl

Bomb Iran, bomb bomb bomb Iran

Blow up their sand

We�ll have �em rockin� and a-rollin�

Rockin� and a-reelin�

Bomb Iran

Ba ba ba ba bomb Iran

Oh bomb Iran, I think we can

Bomb Iran

We�ll have �em rockin� and a-rollin�

Rockin� and a-reelin�

Bomb Iran

GDP, July 11, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6489995

On a thread by babsbunny:

      Anti-Gay Alabama A.G. Caught Being Gay
http://wonkette.com/401018/anti-gay-alabama-attorney-general-caught-being-gay

"This may come as a shock, but a prominent anti-homosexual Republican attorney general has apparently been caught having homosexual sex intercourse with his homosexual gay male assistant. Bonus: The dude�s wife caught him, in their bed. This is the rumor that the AG�s office has officially denied, so now of course everybody is spilling the sordid details.

AG in question is Troy King, who, of course, is only interested in outlawing homosexuality and sex toys. His gay lover is either a college buddy, or a very young youngster and Homecoming King' from Troy University. What are the odds of a dude named Troy King getting caught in bed with a Homecoming King from Troy University... ?"

response #4 by baldguy:

      HE'S NOT A GAY MAN!
He just has sex with them.

response #8 by kmlewis:

      He's not gay...
but his boyfriend is.

response #7 by FloridaJudy:

      "Homosexuality and sex toys"????
Damn it, is nothing sacred? Corporations manufacture those sex toys! Why does he hate America?

You can have my sex toys when you pry them from my cold, dead......um

--------------------------------------never mind :yoiks:

response #9 by krispos42:

      That's a helluva deathgrip, then
Hmmm... might explain why those three Wisconsin teens were running around a graveyard with a shovel and a copy of the obits.

Oh, I'm going to hell...

GD, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3605062

On a thread by RamboLiberal:

      Cheney's heart OK, doctors say
"'All is fine,' Cheney press secretary Megan Mitchell said after Cheney's annual checkup, which took less than two hours at George Washington University Hospital.

Cheney has had four heart attacks, quadruple bypass surgery and two artery-clearing angioplasties.

In addition to the physical exam, he had an electrocardiogram, a test that detects and records the electrical activity of the heart, and imaging of the stents placed in the arteries behind his knees in 2005, Mitchell said..."

response #4 by Wilms:

      Excellent!
Then he's fit to stand trial!

response #8 by What's Ambien for?:

      I can't keep up these days with the new drugs..

response #30 by dixiegrrrrl:

      Ambien (Zolpidem)
prescription medication used for the short-term treatment of insomnia, as well as some brain disorders. It is a short-acting nonbenzodiazepine hypnotic.

Zolpidem is approved for the short-term (usually two to six weeks) treatment of insomnia.
Did you get that? Short-term. Not long term.

Side effects at any dose may include:

* Anterograde amnesia
* Hallucinations, through all physical senses, of varying intensity
* Delusions
* Altered thought patterns
* Ataxia or poor motor coordination, difficulty maintaining balance<30>
* Euphoria and/or dysphoria
* Increased appetite
* Decreased libido
* Amnesia
* Impaired judgment and reasoning
* Uninhibited extroversion in social or interpersonal settings
* Increased impulsivity
( poor gun aim also )

Even more and novel side affects when you mix with alcohol.

( Interestingly, The United States Air Force uses zolpidem as "no-go pills" to help pilots sleep after a mission.
The "go-pills" dextroamphetamine, served under the name Dexedrine,act as a stimulant for the same pilots, the effects of which are reversed by the aforementioned "no-go pills")
Meaning we give pilots uppers and downers. Just like Judy Garland..how re-assuring.)

Source: Wikipedia

response #54 by Wilms:

      I think you found the WMD.

response #15 by blueDachi:

      How?
How could they say it was OK when it was found to be two sizes too small???

response #20 by Robeson:

      Why is there never any good news anymore.

response #21 by daleo:

      Bush's brain ok, say doctors
Doctors reported Saturday that President Bush's brainwaves were normal for an insane moron.

response #25 by happygoluckytoyou:

      WHY THE BIG DICK'S HEART IS SO VALUABLE----->
new, unused and still in original packaging

used to make people with normal sized hearts feel even better about themselves

airlift to the north pole and slow global warming

.... please feel free to jump in any time.....

response #42 by AndyTiedye:

      Surgery to Remove the Wooden Stake Was Successful

response #46 by Historic NY:

      Send him more bacon.

response #48 by Tutonic:

      67???? Hell if I looked like that at 67 I'd ask Harry Wittington to shoot
me.

LBN, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x3392904

OP by crispini:

The Denver Group: Maybe Outside CHANCE Lee Mercer Jr. is to be the 2008 nominee after all.
"...Maybe, just maybe, a bunch of delegates to the Democratic Convention in Denver will change their minds at the last minute. Maybe there is an outside chance that between now and the last week of August a critical mass will decide that Barack Obama is not their guy -- that, to the surprise of one and all, Lee Mercer Jr. is to be the 2008 nominee after all.

That is the thinking behind a small but determined band of Mercer backers, some of whom have formed a 527 fundraising committee that has already run one $9,700 ad in the Chicago Tribune, and plans more in the weeks to come.

"Mercer's name must be put in nomination. His supporters must be allowed to make speeches on his behalf of his candidacy. There must be an honest roll call vote, not a symbolic one, so superdelegates can cast their votes honestly, for either candidate, as their judgment, conscience and democratic principles dictate."

For Eye Spy Community-Military Intelligence (All Three). :patriot:

response #7 by John Q. Citizen:

Isn't he the guy who started that group LAMA?
(Lee's America Must Advance)

GDP, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6493208

On a thread by ruggerson:

      McCain: "I don�t e-mail, I�ve never felt the particular need to e-mail,�
"As he answered questions, sipping a cup of coffee with his tie tight around his neck, his aides stared down at their BlackBerries.

As they tapped, Mr. McCain said he did not use a BlackBerry, though he regularly reads messages on those of his aides. 'I don�t e-mail, I�ve never felt the particular need to e-mail, Mr. McCain said..."

response #4 by JoeIsOneOfUs:

      funny, I've never felt the need to vote Republican! nt

response #5 by Blondiegrrl:

      Why bother? Parchment and quill works just as well.
:evilgrin:

response #7 by Happyhippychick:

      And town criers.

response #12 by TwoSparkles:

      ...and also a sharp rock, a cave wall and...
hieroglyphics

response #13 by Egnever:

      A troubling trend
Perhaps the pukes are getting what they want from public Education?

response #15 by terrya:

      Them newfangled things!
He's probably still angry that about the end of the Pony Express.

response #17 by asdjrocky:

      Stone tablets are heavy...
But hey, if it ain't broke, why fix it?

And see below for a Special Visual Achievement award from this thread.

GDP, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6492244

On a thread by Ken Burch:

A request: No negative posting about Tony Snow for the next few days

response #64 by BlooInBloo:

A truly great American passed. So giving and caring about everybody in this country.

GD, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3604698

On a thread by dkf:

      Sigh...John McCain really doesn't know how to get on the internet.
"Q: But do you go on line for yourself?

Mr. McCain: They go on for me. I am learning to get online myself, and I will have that down fairly soon, getting on myself. I don�t expect to be a great communicator, I don�t expect to set up my own blog, but I am becoming computer literate to the point where I can get the information that I need � including going to my daughter�s blog first, before anything else.

Q: Do you use a blackberry or email?

Mr. McCain: No..."

response #2 by jobycom:

      "I will have that down very soon..."
Like, clicking on the blue E or orange world takes more than a second or two of instruction? "Okay, Senator, now, put your hand on the mouse. That grey thing, yes. No, sir, you're right, it doesn't squeak, very clever sir. No, I don't hear that as often as you might think. Okay, now, move the mouse. Move... No, senator, I mean, just... Now, sir, you have to put it back on the desk to move it. Not off the desk. Okay, now look at the screen and put the pointer over the that blue icon. Sorry, you're right, my fault. The pointer is that little arrow... Yes sir, seemed obvious to me, too. Now, an icon... No, sir, not that kind of icon. Yes, sir, I suppose Reagan is an icon of sorts for some people, but not that kind of icon. Anyway, what's that? Yes, you move the mouse... Yes, that's right, sir, very good, moving the mouse does move the pointer. We are making real progress, sir, I was afraid you would be slow... I mean, not as fast as... Yes sir, sorry sir, didn't mean to imply you were slow, that was my fault. Yes sir, I've heard about your war record. Now if you'll click... No, I really can't imagine what it's like to be a prisoner of war, sir. Now, if you'll click... No, sir, you are right, kids these days don't know what that means. Well, maybe those in Iraq do. Ha ha. No, sir, that wasn't supposed to mean anything. No, sir, it wasn't meant to be a criticism, I was just trying to relate... Yes sir, I'm sorry, now, back... It won't happen again, sir, there's no need to raise your vo... Sir, I don't think that kind of language gets us where we are trying to go... Well, now that you ask, yes sir, I am voting for Obama, but that shouldn't matter... Sir, if you'll just click... Oh, come on, sir, there's no reason to get them involved. No, sir, I'd rather not spend the next six years at Guanta... Yes, sir, maybe you should find someone who relates to you better, sir. You were very close, though, very close to getting online, sir. I'm sure in a week or tw... No, you don't have to pay me, just please, ask the men with the sunglasses to move away from the door...

response #37 by ashling:

      Does he know how to flush the toilet?
"The answer, my friends, to outdated infrastructure is to not flush the toilet."

:rofl:

response #47 by peekaloo:

      Give Ted Stevens a call. He'll learn ya.
"getting on myself"

:rofl:

response #50 by Vickers:

      C'mon, give the guy a break...
...he's getting wi-fi access in the outhouse.

GD, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3610455

On a thread by ensho:

Gates' heifers - this article will make you ill
"It almost sounds like a joke. Set up dairy enterprises in rural African villages with no refrigeration, electricity, veterinary care or passable roads for a population that can't drink milk because it's 90% lactose intolerant.

But the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation didn't think it was a joke when it announced the gift of $42 million to Heifer International at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland in January--the biggest gift the Little Rock, AR-based Christian charity which sends live animals to poor countries has ever received..."

response #9 by IanDB1:

The Gates Must Be Crazy!
If the author had any sense, she would have thought of that headline before I did.

GD, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3611478

On a thread by evilkumquat:

Why Exactly is it Bad to Speak Ill of the Dead?

response #1 by MercutioATC:

Because they will rise from the grave and eat your brains.
I saw it in a movie...

GD, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3611629

OP by bulloney:

      Does anyone agree that Phil Gramm looks like a dildo in a 3-piece suit and glasses?

response #1 by n2doc:

      nah, nobody would ever build a dildo that ugly n/t

response #2 by cherokeeprogressive:

      Doesn't look like any dildo I'VE ever seen.
Where do you shop?

response #3 by Chovexani:

      Dammit, you've gone too far.
Don't you dare compare Gramm to a dildo. Dildos are fun and make people feel good. They provide a valuable public service. :)

response #4 by adsosletter:

      Whipping out THAT dildo would immediately snuff the flame of desire...
...would be my guess...

response #11 by pepperbear:

      my dildo is more comfortable in jeans, a t-shirt, and soft contacts. n/t

GD, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3612686

OP by Wetzelbill:

      Bush is Churchill, and John McCain is TR
Duh! Don't you guys get it! You libruls can't ever see greatness when it's right in front of you.

response #1 by Kutjara:

      Yes, Bush is indeed a petulant alcoholic...
...who has infantile tantrums when he doesn't get his way. I think the similarities with Churchill end there, however.

I'm having a harder time seeing McCain as Roosevelt. Maybe if he grew a moustache...

response #5 by Tutonic:

      Bush is Churchill, and John McCain is TRoll
There, now I fixed your post for you.

response #6 by Wetzelbill:

      So you agree Bush is like Churchill...
:silly:

GDP, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6494964

OP by Peake:

      GWB could _____ and they still wouldn't Impeach
Inspired by Redstate_Democrat's thread in GD.

What do you think Bush would get away with and still not get impeached?

response #4 by ElboRuum:

      Get A Blow Job From Monica Lewinsky
I sense the Clenis.

response #7 by Lil Missy:

      That wouldn't hurt GW. That's only a Constitutional Crisis for a Democratic President.

response #8 by LibDemAlways:

      have sex with a goat on live tv during the superbowl
halftime show....and not only would he not be impeached, he'd end up winning an Emmy.

response #12 by Mendocino:

      Invade Canada, France and Sweden
Stock the Supreme Court with KKKlannies and Nazis

Nuke Seattle, NYC and Hollywood

Strip mine and drill in all the National Parks

Build a "Gitmo" in every state

Declare wolves and spotted owls as terrorists

Burn atheists, gays and vegans in the public square

Make gun ownership a prerequisite for citizenship

Make "Texan" the official US language

Build a border fence around Humboldt County, Vermont and Massachusetts

response #15 by WinkyDink:

      Torture, invade a sovereign nation illegally, betray a CIA covert operation, ....oh, wait.

The Lounge, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7916020

OP by ocelot:

An ice cream truck just went by playing "Koyaanisqatsi."
That would be cool. I'd buy ice cream from that one.

But it would probably be something like mushroom-flavored ice cream, or broccolicicles.

response #1 by Peake:

You'd get tired of it after it went by for the twentieth time that day.
;)

"A way of eating that calls for a different way of eating."
"Eating in turmoil."

The Lounge, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7917022

OP by MannyGoldstein:

I Just Saw The New Yorker. It Opened My Eyes.
Apparently, Barack is an Osama-loving Muslim extremist of some sort. And his wife is militant black-power type, complete with 'fro. And she's armed

Thank goodness that I learned this now, before making the mistake of voting for Obama. Now I'll cast my vote for McCain instead.

Whew, that was close.

GDP, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6496206

OP by Neshanic:

      "Bitsy, you MUST see this New Yorker cover. It is riotous I tell you!"
"Do you think those rubes in those other places will get it's cheeky put down of their nutty streotypes and Fox news images of our guy?"

"Well Bitsums, it is rather sly, and a bold move to make us Northeasterners and certain parts of California laugh, but maybe it is a tad over the top, I must say."

"Oh Brad, you know Californians don't read!"

response #1 by IanDB1:

      LORLEAN!!! LOOK AT THE PICTURE ON THE TEE VEE WITH THE TYPEWRITER ATTACHED! N/T

response #5 by oldtime dfl_er:

      Well, at least it shows them
in the Oval Office! :toast:

response #8 by Dr_eldritch:

      "Brad? This is Chad... You wouldn't BE-lieve today's cover...
Yes, of COURSE the New Yorker. Bunny nearly had to call her SURGEON she almost cracked a smile. Speaking of SURGERY, I'm going in THURSDAY to have my teeth separated. We'll have to meet for cocktails before AND after."

GDP, July 14, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6496937

OP by unblock:

question about the new yorker cover:
i understand why they depicted them as flag-burning, militant, islamic terrorists.

but why did they depict the mccains as black?

GDP, July 14, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6497968

On a thread by babylonsister:

It's 3AM, and John McCain needs to read an e-mail
"It's 3 AM and your children are safe and asleep, but there's a phone in the White House and it's ringing..."

response #2 by NBachers:

Get the kid up to access the email for him

Political Videos, July 14, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=385x157515

On a thread by flpoljunkie:

      John McCain, today: "I know how to win wars."

response #3 by hobbit709:

      Maybe the Punic Wars.
He's old enough.

response #8 by LeftyMom:

      Which explains our remarkable victory in Vietnam.
Oh, wait...

:eyes:

response #12 by mitchum:

      And the North Vietnamese Army thanks him for his contributions

response #17 by SurfingAtWork:

      Replace "win wars" with "get airplanes I fly shot down"
and I couldn't agree with him more.

GDP, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6504428

On a thread by Abacus:

      We all get it.
I wish I didn't feel compelled to do this, but I don't know if I can stand to see another poster who appreciates the NY cartoon "explaining" it to the rest of us morons. I'll save you the trouble: WE GET IT...

response #1 by Richardo:

      I will if the others stop beating the same dead horse and move on to something more important.

response #2 by BOSSHOG:

      I anticipate PETA petitioning to shut down GD-P very soon

GDP, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6504068

OP by hisownpetard:

      McCain announces plan to visit Constantinople in the near past
and, as a gift, promises to bring their leader some internet tubes.

response #5 by Forkboy:

      And he's visiting the Great Library of Alexandria next week.
He's a busy, busy man.

response #12 by Juniperx:

      Perhaps he can work Christiania into his itinerary...
And a swing through Persia would be nice. Ah hell, he should go for the whole Mesopotamian tour!

response #15 by hisownpetard:

      If it's Tuesday, it must be Mesopotamia!
:toast:

response #13 by emilyg:

      Is Bob Hope going with him?

response #14 by Ron_Green:

      KEEP HOPE ALIVE!
His head's in a jar in Pasadena, right?

response #17 by hisownpetard:

      No, I think he's in the same vat of pickling spices as Walt Disney!

GDP, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6505124

On a thread by jefferson_dem:

Laura Ingraham Unhinged! Behind The Scenes Video: Angry At Producers, Thinks She Looks Shiny (VIDEO)
"Laura Ingraham Behind The Scenes Video: Angry At Producers, Thinks She Looks Shiny..."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/07/15/laura-ingraham-behind-the_n_112811.html

response #5 by IanDB1:

We'll DO IT SHINY! FUCK IT! WE'LL DO IT SHINY! FUCKING SKIN SUCKS! n/t

GD, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3620795

On a thread by AZDemDist6:

No traffic jams? I just spoke to a friend in Phoenix, where getting ANYWHERE took an hour
she says now when they jump on the freeway it's clear sailing all the way downtown no matter what time of day.

anybody else seeing this?

response #1 by librechik:

I guess Cyndi McCain was right--you can only get around by small plane in AZ

GD, July 16, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3628268

On a thread by DeepModem Mom:

Two potential VPs join Obama on campaign trail: Nunn and Bayh

response #2 by newmajority:

Their names sum up exactly what I say to either's chance of being VP.
None. Bye.

The whore media is determined to sandbag this ticket with a right winger, aren't they?

GDP, July 16, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6507112

On a thread by notadmblnd:

      Oh yeah, I could be a millionaire... sure.... Anyone get a copy of this scam in their inbox?
"From Attorney John Skelton
5, New Square
Lincoln's Inn
London WC2A 3RJ
16/07/2008.

Hello and Good Day

I feel quite safe dealing with you in this business proposition having gone through your remarkable profile on the internet. Though, this medium (Internet) has been greatly abused, I choose to reach you through it because it still remains the fastest, surest and most secured medium of communication.However,this Correspondence is unofficial and private, and it should be treated as such. Before I introduce myself, I wish to inform you that this letter is not a hoax or Scam mail and I urge you to treat it with the seriousness it deserves. I also guarantee you that this deal is hitch free from all what you may think of. I am John Skelton, a solicitor at law. I am the personal attorney/sole executor to the late Engr Robert, hereinafter referred to as my client' who worked as an independent oil magnate in my country and who died in a car crash with his immediate family on the 5th of Nov 2000. Since the death of my client in Nov, 2000, I have written several letters to the embassy with intent to locate any of his extended relatives whom shall be claimants/beneficiaries of his abandoned personal estate and all such efforts have been to no avail..."

response #3 by RebelOne:

      Send this reply. It's my favorite.
Dear Sir,

Thank you very much for writing to me. I am Conchita and I am so poor that I have no last name, as my father could not afford one for me. We live on a small island in the South Pacific and are the only family that has lived here for the past one hundred years.

Unfortunately, we have eaten almost everything on the island except for the dirt and two skinny dogs that are too old to scratch fleas. Fortunately, we ate all the fleas so there are none left for the dogs to worry about.

I am so pleased that you have offered to send us all that money. We have not seen money for the last three generations as we have no place to spend it and no means of getting to a place where we could spend it if we wanted to. I can assure you that we will take excellent care of your funds and invest them wisely. Our plan for the money is as follows:

1. We want to build a deep-water port in Williwilli, our little lagoon here on the island.

2. We then want to bring in a barge with an electrical generator so that we can have electricity on the island once again. We haven't had electricity in over two hundred years because the last generator broke down and we have no parts to repair it.

3. We want to build a school here so the children can learn to read and write. It is really hard to create email messages with no electricity and no knowledge of reading or writing skills.

4. We then want to install a phone company so we can communicate with the outside world and meet more wonderful people like you and your blessed family.

5. We then want to build a satellite cable system so we can watch television and see all the latest fights in the world. We don't have those here and miss them very much. We think that we could probably hook up a computer to the cable or telephone lines so we could send email messages to our newfound friends when we get them.

6. We want to build a grocery store so we have a place to buy things like bubble gum and candy, something we have never had here.

7. We will then need to build a road from our cave to the grocery store so we can get there. Of course, we will need a car to drive on the road or there will be no point in having a road, will there?

8. If we get a car we will need gas and oil but maybe we could just take some from the electrical generator and save that money for a beauty salon, something we really need here. Have you seen the women around here? They are just awful looking.

9. Of course, we will have to build a church so we have a place to go and be thankful for the gifts you have offered us.

Once all these things have been completed, if there is any money left we would like to use it to build a house to live in. The hole we use for an outhouse is rapidly filling up since we began receiving your letters of appeal and we will need to move soon as the cave will be unbearable to live in during hot weather. Air conditioning in our new house would be nice too.

It is too bad that I am only eight years old. If I were older I could come and visit you if you sent me an airplane ticket and an airplane with pontoons on it so it could land in the lagoon. One of my grandchildren would like to come and visit you also, if you don't mind.

I shall patiently await the arrival of the next bottle with your message telling us when the money will be here. Thank you again, for your kind generosity; it is sincerely appreciated.

Conchita

response #10 by LiberalFighter:

      You're 8 years old and have grandchildren?

response #12 by TahitiNut:

      You mean THAT'S the only part you found hard to believe??
:rofl:

response #7 by cloudbase:

      Well, you've gone and violated the solemn confidentiality.
I'll be damned if I'll ever pass along any secrets to YOU!

response #9 by notadmblnd:

      if you want something kept a secret, don't tell me.

GD, July 16, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3627850

OP by RGBolen:

Crap I just saw an ad for olympic coverage on NBC. I forgot they have them, guess we have more of
this to come.

Announcer 1: Well, she's crying not because she won but because she found out that her parents were just killed back in her little non-American country because of something they stood for against the government, or something like that.

Announcer 2: Enough about that, American Jimbob Shatstain is about to race, and we want to show you the tragedy in his recent life. Last week Jimbob's childhood neighbor's ex-wife's dog collapsed in her back yard, although the three year old beagle has made a full recovery, veterinarians are still baffled as to how and why it happened, here's our thirty minute report.

After the story.

Announcer 1: And Jimbob Shatstain is ready to go, just look at the determination in his face, to be able to focus like that at this time in his life . . . just incredible, incredible.

Announcer 2: And there you see, the entire Shatstain family watching from a TGIFridays back home.

Announcer 1: Of course they all had to pay over $4 a gallon for gas to get to that TGIFridays.

Announcer 2: Yes, Yes, you know American courage, bravery and sacrifice truly know no bounds.

response #4 by Neshanic:

Also the never ending moronic chatter during the opening ceremonies, with requisite
interruptions every two minutes to have a commercial. Insipid information on countries that the announcers find amusing. Did you know that they call soda something weird there?

GD, July 16, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3630718

OP by DFW:

Everybody join in and sing the Talkin' TSA Blues with me!
I posted this on another thread. I was actually going to record it some day,
if I ever got around to it (maybe TFT will do it). For now, just think up
your own blues background, and imagine you're Ted Kennedy stuck in an airport
somewhere with some pea-brained uniform asking you why you're a bad American,
and sing away.........

THE TALKIN' T S A BLUES (by li'l ol' me)

I booked a little trip to the Florida Keys
A week of sun and a light sea breeze
Grabbed the wife and the luggage, we were on our way
But we didn�t reckon with the T S A!

Made the check-in counter in plenty of time,
Proceeded to the security line,
Took off my belt, took off my shoes,
And then I learned to sing the T S A blues.

They said I�m on a no-fly list
I must be a famous terrorist
Osama must be my best pal,
And I was a Qaeda, �cause my name was Al.

They made me spit into a cup,
And that cleared the confusion up,
They couldn�t match my D N A,
So, �good bye sir, and have a nice day!�

We left to go and catch our plane,
Whispered these guys are insane
A uniform stopped us, hands on hips
Said, �We heard that! We read your lips!�

They called me bad, they called me wicked,
Demanded to know if I had liquid.
I said, �just five quarts of blood.�
�That�s over the limit, you�re busted, Bud!�

Now my poor wife began to cry,
She wondered if we�d ever fly.
A grim-faced man came up and said,
�We have to check. Remove your head.�

I yelled that my head was not removable.
They said they�d let it go if that was provable.
My wife said, �This has gone too far,
�Forget the flight, let�s get the car.�

We got our stuff, and drove back home,
Said, �this looks good, no need to roam!�
Home, sweet home, and you know, what�s more,
No one felt us up on the way to the door.

They say their motives have the utmost purity,
And the whole routine is for our security,
But as long as I am free to choose,
Well, someone tell United the news:
That�s the last time I�ll sing the T S A blues!

GD, July 17, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3636422

On a thread by baghdad_bush:

      Obama on his upcoming Iraq Trip. DON'T GO! I THINK THAT IT'S A SETUP!
Maybe I'm a little paranoid but I fear that it gives the Republicans, like that sneaky TurdBlossom, an opportunity for one of those surprise insurgent attacks to happen!!

Keep in mind that only the liberals get rubbed out.

You see it in the movies all the time.....

JMO

response #3 by Zynx:

      "You see it in the movies all the time...." Yeah, and the apocalypse is depicted
all of the time too. I have yet to be killed by zombies, sucked through a black hole into a satanic dimension, struck by an asteroid, or see the world devolve into a chaotic mess of motorcycle gangs.

response #12 by ieoeja:

      Maybe you just need to get out more? n/t

GDP, July 17, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6511628

On a thread by KamaAina:

Cathedral dig yields finds from 1700s New Orleans
"The first archaeological dig at one of the nation's oldest cathedrals has turned up a mix of new finds in the heart of the French Quarter. Discoveries behind St. Louis Cathedral include a small silver crucifix from the 1770s or 1780s and traces of previously unknown buildings dating back to around the city's founding in 1718.

The crucifix might have belonged to Pere Antoine, a Capuchin monk who was rector of the cathedral which dominates Jackson Square, lead archaeologist Shannon Lee Dawdy told The Associated Press on Tuesday....

Dawdy said the most significant find is probably the foundation of a hut where archaeologists uncovered a mixture of French artifacts from the early 1700s and fragments of Native American pottery, some painted red and others tempered with crushed shells...."

response #2 by Winebrat:

Did they find anything belonging to John McCain?

The Lounge, July 17, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7930744

OP by zbdent:

      Marijuana farm busted on (Girl) Scout camp
http://news.aol.com/article/marijuana-farm-busted-on-scout-camp/86370

and in the Boy Scouts, I was busted for eating Brownies ...

response #1 by libnnc:

      But that is a brilliant business model...
see they make those cookies too.

Genius, really.

response #2 by NightWatcher:

      they were tipped off when that troop sold 180 thousand boxes of thin mints in one month

response #3 by lumberjack_jeff:

      "50 bucks an ounce!? I remember when they sold cookies by the box."

GD, July 17, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3633770

On a thread by FarceOfNature:

      Girl Scout Camp Marijuana Farm Busted
"Police found thousands of marijuana plants being grown in a remote part of a Girl Scout camp, according to court documents and a scout official.

Officials at Camp Ella J. Logan were dismayed when they found out what had happened, said Sherri Weidman, chief executive of the Limberlost Girl Scout Council.

Police found the hidden marijuana farm with plants in various stages of cultivation in a wooded swampy area of Kosciusko County, according to documents filed Monday in U.S. District Court in South Bend. Some of the plants were growing on land belonging to a local resident, while the bulk - about 5,000 plants - were growing on camp land. State troopers in an airplane spotted the plots.

Mario Comacho, 44, Mariano Gonzales, 38, and a juvenile were arrested last week after police found the farm. Comacho and Gonzales, both of Goshen, appeared for an initial hearing Monday in federal court on charges of possession of more than 1,000 marijuana plants with the intent to distribute. Neither man had an attorney, according to court documents..."

response #1 by behave:

      in a related story girl scout cookie sales up 300%

response #2 by PeterU:

      Gives a whole new meaning to Brownies.
:)

response #8 by Imagine In Texas:

      I am sure they
were just trying to earn a gardening badge.

response #10 by EOO:

      So that explains the 40,000 missing boxes of thin mints.

The Lounge, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7932978

OP by swampg8r:

      PUMA PUMA
bo buma
banana fana fo fuma
PUMA

im very tired today
i was a pallbearer for the guy who wrote the "hokey pokey"

response #1 by larissa:

      Gator, stop giving that Republican Hack group free publicity!!
Or we're gonna have to fry up a batch of gator tails..

response #2 by swampg8r:

      im tired from the funeral
all day long
we put his left leg in
we took his left leg out
i thought it would never end

response #7 by 1Hippiechick:

      You sure must be tired - you left a line out of the song!
Puma Puma
bo buma
banana fana fo fuma
Fe-fi-fo-fuma
PUMA

response #11 by Blue_Tires:

      good memory! now do "chuck!"

GDP, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6513330

OP by GloriaSmith:

      That's it. I'm officially pissed at/concerned with the Obama campaign.
Being the patriotic American that I am :patriot:, I'm watching the Colbert Report right now. The fantastic Elizabeth Edwards (hi Elizabeth! :hi:) is on and while the interview goes well, she admits at the very end that the jet ski has not arrived yet. Yes people, let me repeat that for dramatic effect: The jet ski has NOT arrived yet.

I thought the Obama campaign was more organized than this. All John wanted was to get a job as a spy and a jet ski. GIVE JOHN THE DAMN JET SKI ALREADY OR I'M VOTING FOR McCAIN!!!! :grr:

:rofl:

response #2 by gateley:

      He is dead to me. nt

response #3 by GloriaSmith:

      I have started my own organization to bring attention to this madness:
GETS:

Get
Edwards
The
Stuff

I'm off to print flyers and stalk Howard Dean until my temper tantrum works.

GDP, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6513129

On a thread by swampg8r:

      so out we went
... we started in the Suntree area
knocking on the strange doors of strange people
we had 20 copies each of Obamas issue statements from his website
each with web addresses on business size cards stapled onto them
to point those interested to online support...

response #4 by NYC_SKP:

      K&R My dog loves gators...except,
they get stuck in her teeth.

She's nine pounds of twisted steel and out barking at a raccoon, better go get her. Thanks swampg8r!

response #7 by swampg8r:

      hope shes ok
i had a cat once that was sodomized by a racoon
she never really got over it
and the racoon never ever even called her

response #15 by NYC_SKP:

      I can't blame the racoon...
....have you ever smelled cat ass?

GDP, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6513147

OP by elehhhhna:

      Yes, MSM, it's a "horserace", alright...
Barbaro v. a jar of glue, maybe.

response #1 by XemaSab:

      Secretariat versus an antique horsehair sofa
:P

response #2 by gratuitous:

      Give the talking chuckleheads a break
Trying to make McThuselah into a viable presidential candidate is going to take some serious fudging of everything from facts to opinion to reality. The sky may even appear to turn orange or purple for a while. But if they're going to keep their phony baloney jobs and keep pulling down their ridiculously oversized paychecks, they're going to be puffing Straight-Talkin' Johnny Maverick from here to doomsday. And it will now be doubly hard since St. Timothy of the Pumpkinhead has been jack-o-lanterned.

This is not an enviable task.

Heh, heh, heh.

response #3 by 11 Bravo:

      Barbaro being dead, perhaps a better comparison could be made.
:evilgrin:

GD, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3641248

On a thread by cat_girl25:

      Doctor, is my heart strong enough for Sex?

response #1 by tridim:

      Doctor, is my stance wide enough for public restroom sex?

response #3 by Kutjara:

      "Yes, your heart's strong enough, but...
...you're too ugly for sex."

Really, asking this question is just inviting every examining-room comedian to have a laugh at the patient's expense.

response #5 by cat_girl25:

      I guess a way to get around it is to tell the doc that you want to start jogging.
If s/he clears you to jog, then you're okay for sex. :)

response #8 by Kutjara:

      That's a good approach, but what if you're...
...healthy enough for sex, but not for jogging? I mean, you might be too feeble to run a marathon, but still be able to bonk without keeling over.

Maybe what's needed is a "Shagging Equivalency Scale," which would consist of activities that place the same stress on the heart as various types of sexual activity, but don't require the patient to come right out and say, "Doc, can I fuck?"

So you might find a patient asking, "Am I strong enough to hang curtains?" To which the doctor would reply, "Full length or kitchen?" By referring to the SES, the patient could then be assured that he was too unwell for double reverse cowgirl with a twist, but perfectly able to manage light mutual masturbation. And, more importantly, everyone's blushes would be spared.

response #7 by chimpsrsmarter:

      i am so sick of ads for dick problems, can't pee, can't get it up, have a pill.
what do we have, ads for tampons usually set at a volleyball game, yeah when i have cramps playing volleyball is exactly what i want to do.

response #11 by hootinholler:

      I'm never gonna ask, I'll tell him hell yes my heart is strong enough! Why?
Because I want my epitaph to read "He came and he went!"

GD, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3641232

On a thread by kpete:

      Crying girl darts away from Bush at White House tee-ball game
"A little girl became so badly frightened while being introduced to President Bush on Wednesday during a White House tee-ball game that she darted away in tears...

As Bush attempted to offer Emily a baseball, she became spooked by either the president or the chipmunk mascot that was standing several feet away on the other side of the president.

Emily, who appeared to be crying, first attempted to hang back and hide behind the brim of her baseball cap, then succeeded in pulling her hand out of the grasp of the man who was leading her forward and dashed away through a gap in the fence and lost herself in the audience..."

response #10 by marmar:

      She must be the soy-milk drinking progeny of a radical black feminist Muslim-sympathizer mom.......
.... being raised by two gay dads and wearing recycled Al Gore-approved clothing, if she would publicly humiliate President Bush like that.

:think:

response #13 by paparush:

      And a child shall lead them..

GD, July 18, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3640829

And four threads which defy excerpting:

OP by Mobius:

      URGENT - Brett Favre unretires!

The Lounge, July 11, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7911731

OP by Mobius:

      Three word story *FUN!*

The Lounge, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7913567

OP by graywarrior:

      To women who pee all over public toilet seats: I HATE YOU!

The Lounge, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7923303

OP by DangerDave921:

      Marlboro Man?

GDP, July 17, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6511937

On a thread by JeffR:

      Open thread for anyone in GDP not already involved in an argument
C'mon in and mix it up here.

:popcorn:

response #1 by Kurt_and_Hunter:

      STFU

response #2 by cliffordu:

      Bla de blah de blah....Arghhh spittle, belch, rant......
:popcorn:

response #4 by CaliforniaPeggy:

      **Cautiously opens door and peeks in...**
Is it safe in this thread?

There's bodies, sirens, graffiti and god knows what out there... :scared:

response #138 by BushDespiser12:

      Why are you wasting my time with arguing?
I don't have time to respond to stupid posts like this. So, next time, make sure there is something worthy OF MY SPECIALNESS to reply to. People that argue and bluster on internet boards are beyond help, let me tell you!

response #10 by prodn2000:

      Your wish....
Your trolling is tiresome and drab.

I have hit the alert button. I didn't leave a message, but I believe the OP speaks for itself.

:grr:

response #116 by krispos42:

      Locking...
Announcing you've alerted on somebody is against DU rules. Skinner's Secret Service will be at your house momentarily. You can save time, money, and effort by simply sticking a fork in the electrical outlet prior to their arrival, otherwise they'll bill you for the taser batteries.

And thank you for your support.

response #13 by Elrond Hubbard:

      Fuck you and you and you and you and YOU.
Did I get everybody?

response #19 by merh:

      Hey look at it this way
at least the FISA threads have died out.

:hide:

response #36 by arco:

      Obama is planning to vote YES on giving The New Yorker immunity!
See, we can mix it all up! :)

response #34 by scarletwoman:

      May I call someone a fucking dolt?
I wanted so badly to call this one poster a fucking dolt, but I had to backspace and delete what I wrote because I didn't want my whole post to be deleted.

But the fucking asshole really deserved it because he totally WAS a fucking dolt and his stupid fucking arguments were fucking idiotic and he fucking totally pissed me off with his fucking arrogance and all-around jerk-offedness and I really really wanted to call him a fucking dolt as he so richly deserved. But I couldn't, Dammit.

response #41 by mrs_p:

      how can you possibly think that
you must be (take your pick)

(1) an idiot
(2) rw troll
(3) sour from the primaries
(4) a du newbie who doesn't belong here
(5) not a true progressive
(6) not a true democrat
(7) brainwashed from the right (and sometimes left)

i'm sure i missed many - does it always feel like mom and dad are fighting here on DU??

response #44 by laststeamtrain:

      I think Jeff Beck is a better guitarist than Jimi, Jimmy & Eric combined.
& I don't give a flying fuck who knows it.

PS: I like chicken-fried steak. I like it when they serve the gravy under the steak so you have a little control.
I once drove from Seattle to San Diego mostly on 101. I ate Chicken-fried steak everyday. I didn't listen to any Jeff Beck on the road.

response #109 by NanceGreggs:

      Beck? Are you kids crazy?
Beck is the worst RW radio host I've ever heard, and his CNN show is a DISGRACE! I can't imagine that his guitar-playing abilities would be any better than his ability to - oh, did you say Jeff Beck?

I thought you were talking about Glenn Beck.

Oh, well that's different, then.

Nevermind.

response #110 by cliffordu:

      Actually I thought YOU were referring to that folksinger "Beck".....
:rofl:

response #127 by laststeamtrain:

      I'd like to see Glenn Beck with an electric guitar in his hands about to step into a puddle of water.
Zorch his sorry ass from here to eternity.

Condolences to his family & all that...

response #133 by JenniferZ:

      Oh yeah?? He's a rank amateur compared to Stevie Ray Vaughn.
NOBODY beats Stevie Ray. NOBODY.

So you just take your weenie Jeff Beck and stuff it, man.

Well, okay, I guess the plane crash kind of had the upper hand... But still, NOBODY beats Stevie Ray, man. NOBODY.

response #51 by stevil:

      Will all of you please shut up?
I'm trying to watch King Kong.

response #53 by NanceGreggs:

      Okay, smart ass, lets's get down to it ...
This country is going to hell in a handbasket - and I've yet to understand why, in this technological age, we are still even using handbaskets. Shouldn't the country be going to hell in a spacecraft the size of the head of a pin, that can traverse the distance between here and hell at fifty times the speed of light?

And speaking of the heads of pins (of which I was; see above), why do people insist on conjecturing how many angels can dance thereupon? They're ANGELS, for God's sake - is there no room in his Many Mansions for a proper dance-floor, maybe like the one in Saturday Night Fever?

Why are kids still described as being "as cute as a button"? Just how cute is your average button, you might well ask (and I just did). And before buttons were invented, what were kids described as being as cute as?

Where would we be now if Bell's first phone call had resulted in a busy signal? Would he have scrapped the whole idea?

And speaking of phone calls (which again, I just was - and why is no one paying attention?), who are these people with cell-phones talking to all the time? Did they feel this same urgency to yak incessantly before cell-phones were invented? If what they have to say now is so important, why can it only be conveyed while they're standing in the check-out line at the supermarket?

How can news that was "broke" two weeks ago still be late-breaking news today? And who broke it in the first place? Shouldn't important news be handled with more care?

Why do the possible side-effects of certain drugs include sudden, inexplicable death, when the condition they purport to treat has never been known to be fatal?

Now, if anyone here wants to bring it on with respect to the aforementioned, I am ready to argue to the death - or bedtime, whichever comes first.

response #56 by scarletwoman:

      All I want to know is, where the hell are our flying cars? They PROMISED us flying cars!
I WANT MY FLYING CAR!!!!!11!!

And my personal jet pack, while we're at it...

response #66 by cliffordu:

      I WANT MY GODDAMMED PONY!!!!

response #67 by NanceGreggs:

      Not to mention ...
... (but I will mention it, nonetheless), those monorail highways where you could program your car's route, and then play Scrabble with your family as your vehicle delivered you to your destination in extreme safety and comfort.

I suppose it could be argued that we have a version thereof; not only can you play Scrabble, you can catch the latest movie, communicate with your stockbroker, and grill a few T-bones while en route to Grandma's house.

The only thing they left out of the equation was the part where the driver's participation was rendered unnecessary.

response #71 by cliffordu:

      Don't worry about the driver - Jesus really DID take the wheel....

response #75 by NanceGreggs:

      Not for nuthin' ...
... but Jesus turned out to be a very poor driver.

Maybe if he prayed to that little plastic statue of himself on the dashboard, he'd be infused with a much better sense of safe navigational skills.

response #78 by scarletwoman:

      Oh for Christ's sake! How well would YOU drive with your hands nailed to a crossbeam?
Everyone's a critic...

response #87 by trashcanistanista:

      I'm watching Cynthia McKinney on CSPAN.
She's giving her green party nomination speech. Am I allowed to say this here?

response #92 by cbc5g:

      no you're banned for life

response #125 by krispos42:

      You forgot the disclaimer
WARNING: may cause cirrhosis of the liver, inflammation of the
brain, heart damage, pancreatic damage, kidney damage, spleen implosion, thyroid combustion,
severe nasal hair growth, blindness, eruptia, pregnancy, infertility, fecal incontinence,
impotence, loss of genitalia and/or hermaphroditism, hair loss, skin blemishes, bone deformity,
throat cancer, ulcers, hangnails, bladder leakage, sores, scabs, elephantiasis, hepatitis,
conjunctivitis, gingivitis, appendicitis, bronchitis, and athlete's foot. Not recommended for
children, adults, senior citizens, animals, insects, or dead people.

There, now you're legally protected!

:rofl:

response #143 by OPERATIONMINDCRIME:

      I'm An Extremist Hating, Ignorance Slaying, Steak Eating, Cigarette Smoking, SUV Drivin,
Walmart shoppin (occasionally), 80 mph drivin, Hillary lovin, cop respecting (for the most part), mckinney hatin, nader loathing, chavez mocking, second amendment defending douchebag who thinks kucinich is mostly a lunatic and that impeachment, though nice to think about, is a fantasy in the minds of those so ungrounded as to think that it would ever happen to this administration in a million years.

response #144 by Buck Rabbit:

      I was stalked by a PUMA on the board yesterday.
It was kind of fun to play with as fortunately its teeth and claws, among other things, weren't too sharp.

And much more.

GDP, July 14, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6496971

On a locked thread:

Straight Females only: Did you ever go through a "Lesbian phase"?

response #8 by greatauntoftriplets

Locking.
This is what we define as a sex thread on DU. And it is degenerating pretty quickly, so it's time for the padlock.

greatauntoftriplets
DU moderator

The Lounge, July 14, 2008

OP by Ichingcarpenter:

      New Iranian Multiple Missile Shot from Faux News- Watch out World!

GD, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3604211

On a thread by ruggerson:

      McCain: "I don�t e-mail, I�ve never felt the particular need to e-mail,�

response #37 by Occam Bandage

GDP, July 12, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6492244

OP by MrScorpio:

      Typical day in The Lounge... In Pictures

The Lounge, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7916908

OP by lame54:

      Hey Jesse!

GDP, July 13, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6494450

OP by Ichingcarpenter:

      The New Yorker Edits its Cover by Adding McCain

GD, July 14, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3617524

OP by IWantAnyDem:

      McCain's long lost brother found

response #1 by NattPang

response #11 by phrigndumass

response #14 by Maine-i-acs

GDP, July 14, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6499339

OP by zulchzulu:

      Photographic Proof that John McCain "knows how to win wars"

response #8 by zulchzulu

GDP, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x6504561

OP by DuStrange:

      Is it just me, or are these Chick tracts getting a little weird?

The Lounge, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7922471

OP by Maddy McCall:

      Design the cover of the first issue of "The Dee Youer" magazine.

response #7 by Oeditpus Rex

response #8 by Reverend_Smitty

responses #9 & #17 by DS1

response #23 by krispos42

response #34 by Sugar Smack

response #43 by SacredCow

responses #52 & #67 by Call Me Wesley

response #59 by GoPsUx

response #61 by bob_weaver

The Lounge, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x7924568

In a locked thread, response # 320 by NYC_SKP:

      ***CLASS PROJECT GONE WRONG!!!***

GDP, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=132&topic_id=6503045&mesg_id=6504417

On a thread by cboy4:

      It is the end of the nutball Christian right. Here is your proof. To go

response #2 by mcctatas

GD, July 15, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3619825

On a thread by BurtWorm:

      Yeeeuch!

response #1 by Bluebear

response #5 by baldguy

response #6 by TahitiNut

GD, July 17, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3634942

OP by Prisoner_Number_Six:

      Hey, Congress- FISA this.

GD, July 11, 2008: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3602337