My letter to the President

[Aviation Pro]

Dear Mr. President,

Let me first say that I admire the efforts you have made to right the ship since your inauguration. The wreckage left by the previous administration would tax the strongest among us and you have proven your mettle by tackling what can only be described as an Aegean stable.

But now I must speak to you as a father.

My two children, xxxxx, 13, and xxxx, 11, are part of the same generation as Sasha and Malia. We've set their moral compasses and pointed them in the direction of their dreams, their hopes and their goals. Yet, in spite of our best - our greatest - efforts as parents all of our work may be undone by the malfeasance of corporations. The disaster in the Gulf is more than a bellweather it is a call-to-arms and requires decisive action to reign in the terror of corporations. Unlike the average citizen of our great country you, Mr. President, have the power to bring these despoilers to heel.

For the sake of our children, for the sake of the environment we will leave them, you must use all of the tools you have at hand to ensure the future for Sasha, Malia, xxxxx and xxxx as they inherit the Earth.

[LiberalLoner]

1. Powerful. I hope he reads it. n/t

[treestar]

2. Is this "decisive action" constitutional?

[Aviation Pro]

4. Why don't you leave that to the President and his battalion of lawyers?

Unless you're the President.

[treestar]

9. Well you seem to have already told the President

What he should do - though you're a bit vague - so long as it's action and decisive it'll do? Whether it is constitutional or not or does any good or not?

You're starting to sound like Bush. The decider would have done something decisive by now.

[Tansy_Gold]

3. It's not strongly worded enough. Letters need to be strongly worded

It's "Augean" stables. Google is your friend.

"The disaster in the Gulf is more than a bellweather it is a call-to-arms and requires decisive action to reign in the terror of corporations" is a run-on sentence without even the politeness of a comma, and the word is "bellwether" which can be looked up on google so you'll know why it's not "bellweather."

Rein in, not "reign in."

For the sake of your children. . . .



C-.





Tansy Gold

[Aviation Pro]

5. Did you understand the intent?

My answer to you would be no you didn't. Welcome to the ignore list.

[Tansy_Gold]

6. Yes, I understood the intent

But if a person is going to write a letter to the president and expect to get past the first screening, it helps to write an intelligent letter.

Using the phrase "Augean stable(s)" implies that the writer actually knows what the phrase means. It does not mean that the stables are in or on or near the Aegean Sea. Misuse of one word/phrase indicates a possible innocent mistake, but this particular phrase indicates a desire to impress. It's not that weird or unusual a reference, but it's not one used in daily conversation.

The run-on sentence -- it's not even a comma splice of two independent sentences -- indicates the letter writer doesn't know basic English grammar. A concerned parent, yes, but not one who routinely actually writes.

Bellwether is similar to Augean -- often, too often, misused. But it is now the second wrong word in a very very short letter. When the whole rein/reign thing comes into play, this little short letter becomes an exercise in semi-literacy. It would never have received a passing grade in your average junior high in my day which is admittedly many long years ago.

The intent of the letter was to elicit a sense of common purpose and in doing so to prod the president into taking more forceful action against "the corporations," a sentiment I heartily share. But just as the letter writer feels free to criticize the president's actions or inactions, he/she put the letter out here on the DU and thus invites both criticism (constructive or otherwise) and praise. I chose to offer criticism, because there were simply too many errors in too short a letter.

I'm a writer and I've taught writing. I don't usually nitpick the posts on DU, but when the post is a letter and it's intended to go beyond the confines of DU, then I feel I have a right -- and in some cases even an obligation -- to point out the errors.

But hey, if you can't handle criticism. . . . . I could give a fuck less who puts me on ignore and who doesn't, except that I think it's against the rules to announce it.



Tansy Gold

[badgerpup]

8. Not making ANY kind of comparison, OK?

:hi:
But think about much entertainment we get from some of the signs we see.:blush:

I want to make crystal-clear that I agree with this letter, and its intent COMPLETELY...:applause:
It IS well-written and well-worded, and I like the Augean stable reference. Can't think of any other way to describe the mess that Bush & Co left...(unless you choose to use the term "Big Honkin' Clusterfuck"). It just needs a few tweaks spelling-wise to ramp it up a notch or six.

People will take you more seriously and you'll come across more strongly if your LTTE, or to the President, or even the sign you're carrying at a protest is spelled correctly.


Got tagged by "Sign my petition please to get this on the ballot?" guy...pointed out several misspellings in his apparently professionally-produced literature (e.g. 'peice' as opposed to 'piece').
It's a good measure, and I signed...but I did point out the inaccuracy and tried to make the same point I'm making here.

[Tansy_Gold]

10. badgerpup, you make an EXCELLENT point

We do here on DU routinely laugh heartily at the "No Amnety" and "moran" signs. Seems we (or some of us at least) ought not to be throwing stones out of our glass Aegean (sic) houses.

:yourock:



TG

[Dappleganger]

7. Have you ever read any of TG's posts?

This user is one of the most productive writers on DU and although you disagree with TG's point of view wrt to your letter, it's to your detriment to ignore TG.

I say this very humbly.

[Tansy_Gold]

11. I am humbled, dappleganger. Thank you very much.

:hi:


TG