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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsI need a group hug.
Im at my Dads. Hes 90 and a staunch Republican. I cant even tell you about our conversation today because Id be slapped down for spouting Republican talking points. HIS talking points. Everything youve heard, on steroids. When I asked him if itd be okay for any political party to have received help from a foreign government, it took him wading through five tries to say it wouldnt be okay. Other things hed never heard about that. All I can say is hes moved on from Fox to a station called One America News.
I just cant. Ive left the basement where the tv is and am up Im the living room.
So sad.
OAN is fox on conservative steroids, at this point ya might want to think if arguing with him is worth it. Maybe just steer the conversation to something else.
CaliforniaPeggy
(149,593 posts)When you can't talk to your own father, it's terrible.
A hug for you from me:
raging moderate
(4,298 posts)Kirk Lover
(3,608 posts)devolves. Sometimes we do it anyway and it never turns out well. So last time we went away when one of us brought something up the other tried to remind the other and we kept it to only a few blowouts...progress I tell ya.
phylny
(8,380 posts)going to watch Perry Mason. Im heading back down. We have actually had a good time for 99% of my visit to N.Y. I just hate knowing hes been so duped. Thanks,
Rorey
(8,445 posts)I'd say just let it be. He's 90 and he's going to be the way he's going to be.
A few years ago I took my elderly aunts for one last visit to see another aunt. One was a staunch Republican. We started discussing politics. It got pretty animated. Then I got hold of myself, realizing that I wasn't going to feel very good if our argument caused this aunt to have a health event.
I try to be careful about who I choose to have my battles with these days.
no_hypocrisy
(46,086 posts)FOX News at Decibel Level 10. You could hear it upstairs with closed doors in a 14-room house.
Go out for a meal. Dad would rebroadcast the latest quote from Bill O'R, Newt, etc. Several times. Delightedly.
FOX News was an old man's version of the Circus Come To Town.
FWIW, I held my tongue, didn't protest, didn't harangue as I didn't want to be left out of the Will. Well, the joke was on me: Dad disinherited me anyway (estate was worth more than 1.5 million) and left $35,000 to the neighbor across the street.
Sampan
(121 posts)no_hypocrisy
(46,086 posts)Because if Dad were here with me, he'd be on the carpet and I'd have the vacuum on . . . . . .
flying_wahini
(6,589 posts)You just have to remember tha5 he was brainwashed. Complete and utter brainwashing.
no_hypocrisy
(46,086 posts)It really was hell when I was a teen in the Seventies. He screamed at me for having the sheet music for American Pie and he threw it out. (Yeah, I didn't like that, but I fished it out and still have it.) Dad was afraid that I'd run away (wonder why?) and return pregnant with a multiracial bastard baby. I could go on and on. You couldn't last with him for an afternoon.
democrank
(11,093 posts)Take good care of yourself.
Eko
(7,281 posts)Near the end he would talk about stupid things like liberals were trying to take his guns, I would tell him that I was a liberal and I am coming to take your guns like I was talking to a little kid and tickle the mess out of him. He both hated and loved that and I would give anything I could to have that again.
Different Drummer
(7,614 posts)bluestarone
(16,916 posts)It's really hard when family CANNOT SEE THE LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!! Hang in there!! LOTS of friends here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Maraya1969
(22,478 posts)Heartstrings
(7,349 posts)FairDemocrat
(82 posts)I have to start working at the Indiana juvenile prison on Monday as maintenance supervisor
Rhiannon12866
(205,237 posts)And you definitely deserve more than one hug!
phylny
(8,380 posts)irisblue
(32,969 posts)Best wishes on the new job.
Sampan
(121 posts)FairDemocrat
(82 posts)My fathers dad help to start the UAW and General Motors sent thugs down from Detroit to have him killed..The people that worked at the factory would only get 3-4 hours of work each day, and no one could even afford to own a car, they all walked to work...They just wanted a 40 hour work week..
grantcart
(53,061 posts)smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)Ohiogal
(31,983 posts)Believe me, I had close relatives too who spouted this nonsense. It tough. You're not alone. Vent to us any time you like.
raven mad
(4,940 posts)trof
(54,256 posts)Tarc
(10,476 posts)So he could use them out in the backyard gun range for target practice.
Having relatives like this sucks, I feel your pain.
ConnorMarc
(653 posts)I know what I think, but I'm interested to hear your take.
How many in your family are this way?
Tarc
(10,476 posts)They consider almost all non-whites to be less than civilized.
There's 2 in the immediate family. One is pushing 90 but mentally checked out years ago, so, least that voice is silent now. That may sound harsh, but after having my sexuality questioned for ~40 years (male with long hair) on top of the racism, not many tears are being shed.
highplainsdem
(48,973 posts)Ilsa
(61,694 posts)and racist lately, saying the most awful and hateful things because trump set that example.
Hang in there.
ConnorMarc
(653 posts)Or were they always this way before?
Also, what part of the country are you in?
Ilsa
(61,694 posts)My family is scattered around the US, but this person is in NE TX.
phylny
(8,380 posts)Cha
(297,160 posts)Hekate
(90,656 posts)Agree to not talk politics if you can.
phylny
(8,380 posts)irisblue
(32,969 posts)HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUGHUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG HUG
roamer65
(36,745 posts)You will be vindicated.
PoindexterOglethorpe
(25,851 posts)My parents are long gone, and I'm pretty sure neither one of them would have fallen for the Fox garbage.
CaptainTruth
(6,589 posts)Hugs!
kairos12
(12,857 posts)Faux news has broken up more families than alcohol.
secondwind
(16,903 posts)Politics should be put aside. He wants you to accept him the way he is.
phylny
(8,380 posts)dameatball
(7,397 posts)There is no way he is going to change. Just be yourself, if he asks. It is not your job to change him at this point. Sounds like you live in close proximity (same home?), so maybe meeting some like minded friends once or twice a week for coffee or a glass of wine or even a walk, would help. But....what do I know??? Anyway, hugs and good luck
phylny
(8,380 posts)No, we live 8+ hours apart. We talk during the week and I come north weve real times a year. I think my heart just breaks to see him so brainwashed.
dameatball
(7,397 posts)Honeycombe8
(37,648 posts)I refuse to talk politics with him. He tries to bait me sometimes, though. They can't be reasoned with. They get ALL their news through snippets on Fox or some such source. For my father, it's Fox News. Hopeless.
You can't talk to them about reality or facts. They are living in an alternate world.
ConnorMarc
(653 posts)Always the case, or a slow conversion?
Would you say that your dad is racist?
What part of the country is this?
ashling
(25,771 posts)She is 89 and in an assistive care facility. M father in law is also 89 and is in he ground for all I care.
the last time I talked to him on the trip home I felt like going p to every Black person I saw and apologizing and begging their forgiveness for even being related to him.
erronis
(15,241 posts)He was a great man who served in the second War-To-End-All-Wars (hah!) who came back from parachuting into France, crossing the Rhine and down to Italy/Austria. He was not a fan of military wars.
He had voted Republican (note that I spell this as Lincoln might have), until Vietnam and he started to waver. With the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq he became fervently anti-repuglican. He would have cast the pResident as a scoundrel and criminal
However he still liked the fux news. He'd have it on whenever we came to visit but he'd also rail against the nonsense that was spewed. Fux apparently understands how to grab the eyeballs of older people.
There's a lot of complexity in all of our likes and dislikes. We're not easily separated into Yes/No.
ConnorMarc
(653 posts)What part of the country is this?
erronis
(15,241 posts)Blue_true
(31,261 posts)yewberry
(6,530 posts)Do your best to keep away from the subject. Do you have other family that you can make the subject of conversations instead of politics?
My ex-POW Grampa and my dad were both stone-cold liberals, and I thank the stars every day that they didn't live to see this.
BobTheSubgenius
(11,563 posts)phylny
(8,380 posts)and absorbed and felt all of your warm and thoughtful comments. People might complain about this site, but I wont. Heartfelt and loving thanks to my fellow DUers.
gademocrat7
(10,656 posts)Sending you hugs.
tavernier
(12,382 posts)phylny
(8,380 posts)😀 Thanks
tavernier
(12,382 posts)Sorry!
phylny
(8,380 posts)Phyl short for Phyllis. My Grandma Madeline used to call me Phyl and it stuck.
Now I have her hair color 😂
SummerSnow
(12,608 posts)It is praise Trump all day long. The brainwashing is strong there.
sprinkleeninow
(20,237 posts)A and a 💛.
uponit7771
(90,335 posts)coeur_de_lion
(3,676 posts)It's beyond heart breaking. Someone here on DU called it a Cold War -- a cold Civil War.
I can't talk to half of my family. Once in a while I look at my brother in law's Facebook page. I've seen posts that describe Obama as a Muslim terrorist, pro NRA cartoons, and videos claiming trump has done more for the Black community than Obama ever did.
That's just the stuff he says publicly. Privately it's so much worse.
I feel your pain. Maybe we should form a support group. They formed Al-Anon for families of alcoholics. Can't we have the same for Fox News-aholics?
Anyway here's a hug from me.