First Father's Day without my dad.

[mindfulNJ]

We lost him 2 months ago...I knew it this holiday would hurt , but wow...I'm having a hard time today.

Here's to all of you who are missing your Dad.

[malaise]

1. The first one is the hardest

Mine's been gone 35 years but we have lovely memories

[Zoonart]

2. I feel your pain.

Third time around the sun without my dad. It does get better.
Accept a hug from a fellow Jersey (girl) born and bred.

[duforsure]

3. So sorry for your loss,

And I miss my Dad so much, and my wonderful father in law is in his 90's and not doing well at all. I am thankful for the wonderful Dad and father in law, and feel I've been very blessed.

[tazkcmo]

4. Hang in there.

I have the same experience on Mother's Day and my oldest son's birthday.

[MLAA]

5. It is a visceral pain

Dear MindfulNJ,

I lost my mom a few years ago. Something about a loss of one of the two people who have known and loved you the longest. The pain finds a place so deep in you that you didn’t even know you had. At least that was the case for me. Sending you healing thoughts and energy. Not sure it will help, but sending it anyway. 💫❤️⭐️

[Frustratedlady]

6. The firsts are always difficult.

Pay attention. You just might feel him near you.

DU hugs to you and yours.

[mindfulNJ]

7. Thank you all

I know it will get better.

Happy Father's Day

[TNNurse]

9. It will get better, but it will always be tough.

You have many memories to comfort you. There is no comparison to other people's experience. Though mine is quite different as I lost my father as a child, we all share a bond. We all understand.

[TheBlackAdder]

12. I second that.

.

I lost my father back in 1987, when I was 26.

He was a strong man who succumbed to mesothelioma, and withered in weight and was prone to turn in a fetal position.

It took a long time to get over his death, as this was the first close death I've experienced. It was so much different than my aunts, uncles and grandparents. While I had time to prepare, and as I sat by his side as he took his last breath, I can still bring myself to tears when I think deeply--such as now, as I write this. The memories I have are almost as vivid as when I experienced them, though they are buried until a situation recalls them. While he is long gone, it only seems like he's away on a very long business trip.

.

[TNNurse]

15. Just to add a little perspective.

And not to sound sadder than the rest of you: my father died June 26, 1960. He was 50, I was 10. I have episodic memories only. It was time when he had to work several jobs to support us, so there was little "family time". He died suddenly so there was no preparing. While I was working as a nurse I was often asked if I knew or observed the difference in losing someone suddenly or someone after an illness or injury. My reply was this. I did not know he was going to die in his sleep one night. What would a 10 yo have said if they knew? But I have no memories of him being sick and pitiful. My mother died after an extended illness. She was 76, I was 41. I knew she was dying, there are no regrets of things not done or things not said. However, I have memories of her long and miserable decline. The summary is that both are awful but can be seen with positive aspects and that generally we do not get to choose.

I hate Father's Day, I have no memories of one. Mother's Day does not bother me, I have good memories.

Just my thoughts and feelings.

[TheBlackAdder]

13. Happy Father's Day, mindfulNJ. In time, you will come to reflect on this day, and embrace it.

.

I am so sorry that you are going through this pain.

It's a slow recovery process--more than I would have ever thought.


What's worse was, that when my father died, my friends at work did not know how to handle it and distanced themselves from me. I found myself isolated at work, for about two months, while I struggled with the loss of my father. We had a lunch group, and after-work crowd that essentially disappeared. That experience hit me so hard, that I try to make myself available to others who are dealing with the same situation.

I'm around Exit 4, or you can Private Mail me, if you would like to chat.

.

[Purple Mountain Maje]

8. 4th Fathers Day without my dad

And June 29th is his birthday so it makes it an extra tough month for our family

[StepnKretchit]

10. First without mine, too.

2.5 months. My sympathy and prayers to you and your family.

[GaYellowDawg]

11. I'm so sorry. Year 8 for me.

It does get easier. It's not that time heals all wounds. It's that time makes the wounds you have a little easier to live with. 8 years in, I am just putting my head down and trying to stay busy today.

I'm sorry for your loss. No one knows what it's like until they go through it. Hang in there.

[CottonBear]

14. My died died in 1981 when I was 17. It is always a sad day for me.

I am very sorry for your loss. It does get less sad over time.

[JudyM]

16. Right there with you. Lost my dad a month and a half ago.

Engulfed with feelings.