Yeah, Bob, I really would like to go to your cookout except I sort of have this... thing...going on

[Tommy_Carcetti]

It’s this whole Second Civil War thing that they’re making me do.

I know, sucks, right?

I mean, who honestly schedules a Second Civil War right on the Fourth of July, really? It’s like the one day we get off for three months and some numbskull is like, “Hey, let’a wage a totally impromptu and completely unplanned insurrection against half the American people, because that will turn out just great!”

Anyways, go ahead and save me some potato salad in case I somehow happen not to get blown away by a M-180 tank and die a bloody death fighting a rebellion against the United States Government, okay, Bob?

Enjoy the fireworks, Bob.

[struggle4progress]

1. Now, see, this is totally the wrong approach to having a civil war.

I think we are going to need to offer some introductory-level classes on the topic

[ehrnst]

2. Remember to wear the hot weather fatigues!

Link to tweet

[George II]

3. Sorry, I'm busy today, participating in the re-enactment of the Bowling Green Massacre.

Civil War III perhaps?

[dembotoz]

4. saw some folks in town lining the sides of the main street....possible evacuation?

[N_E_1 for Tennis]

5. Bottle rockets at the ready...aim...fire...

Ohhh, ahhh, wow how pretty!


“Sir, I can’t seem to get them to stop building that beer can wall, they just keep chanting “Build the Wall, Build the Wall””.

[amlehn]

6. I'm bringing cauliflower jello salad

Can't wait to be there. But nobody sent the directions. Are we at Bowling Green?

[Aristus]

7. Relax...

......there's no such thing as an M-180 tank.