My Trump supporting sister-in-law may never come back

[KrazyinKS]

I really went after her just now. Her husband is in the VA hospital in town, he is gravely ill. She really is crazy about Trump, I stood up and pointed at her and said I can respect our political differences but supporting Trump I treasonous and as a patriotic American you have to quit supporting him because that is treason. She soon left. I feel bad but I can no longer sit quietly.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. Your message is correct but your timing is pretty bad.

[cwydro]

21. Gotta agree.

Plus I’m not big on pointing at people and telling them what to do.

[handmade34]

2. don't sit quietly

but you could reach out for the sake of her husbands well being... we are angry, but at this time I'm pretty sure you can't change her mind and her opinion will make no difference in the upcoming election... focus on the positive you can do

[AlexSFCA]

3. you did the right thing

and we ever get out of this hole and trump get pinished, she will be the one coming back to you.

[procon]

4. That was very harsh of you.

You hit low and took advantage of her with a completely inappropriate attack when she was suffering through a very tragic and vulnerable situation.

Do the right thing an offer a sincere apology.

Be gracious if she refuses.

[KrazyinKS]

5. You are probably right

I do feel bad, he is very ill. But she has always came out very loud in support of trump.

[RandomAccess]

20. I think the most important thing right now is

don't be too hard on YOURSELF. You may or may not have done the right thing -- but you weren't trying to hurt her. You have feelings too, after all, and she must know your feelings about Trump don't match hers.

It'll probably be good if you decide to be "gracious," and whatever else.

BUT, again, please don't be too hard on yourself. Take it as a life lesson, and then go where your new understanding leads you.

[demmiblue]

6. +1

[wellst0nev0ter]

16. Take note at where her husband is getting care

and how her orange hero is gutting healthcare for the rest of us.

These trumpanzees can go to hell, no mercy.

[procon]

23. Why imitate them if we, as Democrats, find their behavior so reprehensible? nt

[hatrack]

24. Do we now forgive or ignore or dismiss their support of a treasonous president?

To prove how "decent" and "sensible" we are?

Let me ask again - do we forgive or ignore or dismiss their support of a treasonous president because they might find us . . . rude?

[procon]

28. We better than you think because we don't act like them.

Trump attacked a Gold Star family and we condemned his lack of compassion.

Trump attacked the grieving widow of a fallen soldier and we decried his inhumanity.

We are not like Trump, we don't kick people when they're down.

We can pick our battles without letting blind rage make us forget about what we stand for and why we value humanity and compassion. There is a time and place to fight over politics, but beating down on a family member who is dealing with one of the worst lifetime crisis events imaginable, is not a defensible decision.

[wellst0nev0ter]

27. Their stupidity should be painful

If we don't make it painful, those people will never learn.

They and their kind are immune to compassion and empathy, so they deserve neither.

[hatrack]

7. You did what you had to do . ..

What a lot of us are probably going to be doing, sooner or later.

[vercetti2021]

8. Read my post about how eventually we'll call our own blood traitors

https://upload.democraticunderground.com/100210883727

[Raine]

9. Don't let Trump disgust turn you into

someone insensitive and cold especially toward someone whose related and dealing with a loved one's bad health.

[octoberlib]

10. You did the right thing.

[global1]

11. I Would Think That Veterans Would Be Particularly Offended By Trump's.....

treasonous behavior. They fight for freedom and our country and then you have the so-called illegitimate president committing treason in broad daylight for everyone to see.

People that have lost loved ones in wars or combat should be really upset with Trump giving away this country.

[Soxfan58]

12. Fuck politics

Your sister needs you. There will plenty time to argue later.

[liberalnarb]

13. What was the context of the confrontation?

[KrazyinKS]

18. She is loud

When she supports that guy she is very loud. My husband brought up politics when I was cooking. She is not a
soft spoken person. He was in Vietnam and crawled through those tunnels, he is a small guy.

[moriah]

14. No offense, and I don't know who started the argument...

... but right now if her husband is gravely ill, she's probably not in the mood to change.

And if nothing else, remember the lessons from dealing with otherwise dysfunctional family members -- we can't cure/change or control what they do or think and usually didn't cause it unless they're our kids and even then it's not always that simple. But you can still care about them.

Right now, caring might best be shown by avoiding politics. Later, at a different time, it might not be. But there's a time and a place for everything. In my humble opinion from experience with health issues and people who are pretty dysfunctional in many ways, even when you think something like whatever is bad for them (in this case, Trump) making their medical care or other things harder to get might open people's eyes, when they're ill or dealing with a loved one's illness isn't the time they are open.

When they're processing the bills, yeah. That might be a better time.

[Wellstone ruled]

15. Her idol Donnie Trumpy said late today,

going to have to cut Veteran Benefits,spending to much on them.

[JI7]

17. it depends on what she was saying. but i don't think her husband

being gravely ill should give her an excuse if she was going on about trump.

[matt819]

19. My sister is s Republican

I don’t know how she voted. She knows I’m a yellow dog dem. We do not talk politics. It’s better that way.

[suprcali]

22. Sounds like she gets impassioned

After yesterday's blatant betrayal of American norms by the person in the highest office, I don't see how one can just take it. It was there for all to see. Anyone excusing his behavior is complicit.

It's like an abusive relationship. You try to come up with all the "reasons" why you should rationalize or excuse the behavior. It's just not a good time to address it. So you try to keep the peace. From both sides are to blame in the murder at Charlottesville, to shithole countries, to child cages, to trashing American Intelligence for murderer putin. This time it's not just you that's affected. It's​ all of America. Meanwhile, the republican lawmakers are going to do nothing but advance their agenda. How long do you just keep taking it?

You did what you had to do in the moment.

[hughee99]

25. Good for you!

Sure, her husband may be dying but you kept your focus on what is truly important, your sister-in-law’s political beliefs. There’s no bad time to tell someone they’re wrong about politics! Perhaps you could make a trip to the VA hospital if her husband supports Trump too.

[Eko]

26. Growing up my Mom seemed pretty liberal.

We had to use food stamps and live in subsidized housing sometimes, she belly danced, liked good music, would go out sometimes with her friends and didn't take us to church. Later she became very conservative and religious, and remained so until before she died recently. The last political thing we talked about she told me she was never voting for a republican again. She died before she got a chance. I'm glad that even with all the political arguments we had that we never broke apart because of it. There is no moral here, no happy ending, not even a suggestion of what you should or shouldn't do. Just a story.